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| Swan-song by Lady Bluejay | 36 Review(s) |
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| Erulisse (one L) | Reviewed Chapter: 16 on 9/24/2011 |
| I am delighted to see another chapter in this tale. You've woven a beautiful tapestry of Rohan life here, with characters that I love. But despite my familiarity with the characters, you have found a new approach and new aspects to focus on and have enriched them. Well done. I look forward to more chapters. - Erulisse (one L) Author Reply: Thank you. I am afraid it might be a few weeks before I am able to post again as I am having some hospital treatment. The story is all in my mind though, just have to get it down. LBJ | |
| Elflingimp | Reviewed Chapter: 15 on 9/12/2011 |
| Wow! Really looking to see what the outcome of this is. I can see no easy solution.......will be waiting for some more of your excellent writing! Hugs The Imp Author Reply: Lots of situations n life offer to easy solution and need some kind of compromise. Thanks a lot taking the time to review.LBJ | |
| Gimli for the win | Reviewed Chapter: 12 on 9/1/2011 |
| To be honest the relationship with Bergit was actually where the story arc started to go bad for me. I thought the plot was a flat out cruel thing to do to someone in that condition and to a fellow soldier, and was generally a low thing to do no matter the strain of the situation or his feelings for the woman - it just felt traitorous and pathetic. And I'll also admit that I didn't like Guleth either (and this isn't because I cannot bare to see Eomer with anyone but Lothririel- that Eomer had relationships before her just makes it more realistic to me), I could kind of see what was coming, and reading this chapter I couldn't help but think that Guleth will either want her son to think her dead husband was his father, or Lothiriel will either be completely supportive of his decisions or insist on Eomer claiming the boy as his son. And that's nice and all, but I just wish she would somewhere get a little annoyed or angry, or assert herself and not be the perfect wife all the time (seeing as Eomer seems to be very much playing the imperfect husband - for example his - albeit briefly - even contemplating 'breaking trust' with Lothiriel in the first chapter). In any other situation, a woman would at the very least feel a little sad that her husband's first born child was not her own. I totally understand and somewhat applaud how you write your character as real people with flaws, and it does seem entirely possible that royalty could have offspring without them being aware of it. All I'm saying is that for me, in this instance, it has taken something away from the characters, and any romance or genuine warmth between Eomer and Lothiriel is steadily being zapped out of the story for me. I'd also like to mention that despite the impression my above comments may give, I think you're a very talented writer, and you're one of the few writers that made me take such an interest in this pair. Reading a story like this by anyone else, I would role my eyes and move on without comment. It's only because I enjoy your writing so much that I was frustrated enough to leave a comment, if that makes sense? Author Reply: Well, I have a bit of sympathy with you over Bergit and Edwick. But I feel that he would never have done it had Bergit not made the first move. And the fact that he let his friend down affected him in the years after. I think I had him say somewhere that he would never break a trust again. I think we all do things we regret and imagine Éomer is no different – although he has learnt from it. And the scene in Harad was only a thought flitting through his mind having a tantalizing woman dance in front of him. Quite understandable to me. Sorry you don’t like Guleth. I see her as taking the opportunity when she could. And I have sympathy with her starting a relationship with someone like Éomer – as I think I said – opportunities like that come once in a lifetime. Be assured they are still romantic together – I will have to show that a bit more. Thanks for voicing your views – they do help me see things from a reader's perspective as sometime all that is in my mind does not get put down on the page. LBJ | |
| Gimli for th win | Reviewed Chapter: 12 on 9/1/2011 |
| I know you're probably trying to write these characters as realistic people, but wth every story I just like Eomer less and less. And where has Lothloriel's backbone gone? | |
| AzureSkye | Reviewed Chapter: 12 on 8/27/2011 |
| Mmh, yes, I'd wondered about that in 'Drummer'. Well, on to see how this affects things.... Thank you for the family lists! Now I can refer back to here when I get confused again... :) Wonderful chapter as always! Author Reply: Thanks. And thnks for your suggestion about the family trees. LBJ | |
| Erulisse (one L) | Reviewed Chapter: 12 on 8/17/2011 |
| I was so pleased to see that you had posted another chapter to this charming story. In Fourth Age Middle Earth, Eomer and Lothiriel are among my favorite subjects, and you work with the entire Dol Amroth family so very well. I love the addition of Inayah to the DA crew. She's fitting in well and seems to be able to hold her own in that over-the-top family. I look forward to the next chapter. - Erulisse (one L) Author Reply: Over the top Family! LOL. That just about sums it up. Glad you are enjoying and thanks for the review. LBJ | |
| AzureSkye | Reviewed Chapter: 12 on 8/15/2011 |
| I want Inayah's outfit. Seriously, it sounds gorgeous. On another note, I think I need family trees...I'm loosing track of children. I'm so happy for Inayah, I think she's going to find her place in Dol Amroth, and be very happy. And have gorgeous children, of course. Can't wait to see the wedding, I'm so excited! I apologize for the rather bouncy review, but I've had a little too much sugar tonight. Wonderful as always! Author Reply: Well, good news and bad -- I will put up details of marriages and children. But there won't be much more about the wedding. Sorry, but I have done so many. Still I will make sure you know what 'the dress' was like. Thanks so much for reviewing. LBJ | |
| demeter d | Reviewed Chapter: 11 on 7/29/2011 |
| Chapter short, yes, but very sweet and to the point. Growing up in Imrahil's household, of course Erchirion would have learned about the customs and manners of their allies and enemies, even if diplomacy was not personally his greatest talent. And imagine what it must have been like for a war-widow with no future prospects besides being the companion to her brother's wife and helping her with any of her future children to have the handsome if rough Gondorian prince save her life and then woo her. And say that he valued her for herself, not just as a brood mare for heirs. I'd say that would be a heady romantic brew for most females. When she was talking to Inayah in the last chapter, Lothy noticed Inayah's eyes sparkling, and what might have been a smile under that veil. And Inayah said they were sisters, now, and, "But it is all right". I think perhaps Amal was looking out for his sister's welfare as much as he could in the limitaions of their culture. As much so as the way most writer's ascribe some foresight for his daughter's potential as well as a union between Gondor and Rohan to Imrahil. The tough warrior Erchirion as a father? Hmm. This could be good. Lotherial calls him her toughest but most "malleble" brother. Like Amroth, he needs to have a daughter with her mother's big eyes, who can tie him around her little fingers, and attract the kind of young men he once was. Hmm! Author Reply: Weel, Lothiriel will find out what is in Inayah's mind in the next chapter. Not sure if its a daughter yet, though! LBJ | |
| demeter d | Reviewed Chapter: 10 on 7/29/2011 |
| Oh, you have given us many good clues here! Inayah remembers noticing the "big, handsome Gondorian commander" noticing her. She heads out for the healer's tent, sees him turn away and thinks he did not notice her. Then she wonders why Amal has brought his new young wife with him to a battle zone just before she remembers her own husband being killed before she could conceive a child, and being stigmatized as barren even though her husband's second wife also never conceived. Based on Amal's respectful treatment both of his sister and Lotherial, I think he was trying to ensure that even if he got himself killed in that violent little police action, he bettered the chance of leaving his young wife pregnant, and thus reserving a place of honor in the eyes of their people. You have established a tradition now for your Princes of Dol Amroth. As young men, they are handsome lady magnets, but when they fall, they fall quite romantically, and quite hard. Erchirion has just saved Inayah from a single, real snake, not a band of two legged ones, like his Father and brothers. But save her he has. I even see parallels between Inayah and Aerin. We first meet both of them as the literate, cultured companions and protectors of younger, less self-confident women. And at the last, she tells Lotherial, "really, it is all right." I think she has fallen as much in love as the tough older brother has! And, her late husband was the barren one, not his wives. It may sometime become an issue between them that her husband was killed fighting against an army which Erchirion and his brothers were part of. Unless, of course, her husband really was just an arrangement out of duty! Hmm. This could get interesting. Author Reply: You have found all the clues, and picked up on parallels I had not thought of! Thanks for your great review.LBJ | |
| AzureSkye | Reviewed Chapter: 11 on 7/29/2011 |
| *grin* Lothi's going to have fun with that bombshell isn't she? I'm glad Erchi's finally found someone who he's fallen for. And can talk to! I agree with Lothi, him merely talking to her seems slightly alien. This seems to be shaping up to be as cute as all your other love stories. I'm liking Inayah more and more. Hope she can be happy in Dol Amroth, and I'm sure she'll be ecstatic when she learns she pregnant! Author Reply: Yes, Inayah has a surprise coming to her. Thanks a lot for reviewing.LBJ | |