Well I knew that snake was trouble even if it was not really to blame
What a harsh way for the two brothers to recognise their own shortcomings and more importantly strengths
it was heartbreaking to see Ithilden thinking he had failed another member of his family what a burden of guilt to carry
And Legolas realising how frightned he was and how much he needed his brother but still conquering his fear
when Adar teaches something it obviously stays taught
stunning terrifying and wonderful
thank you
Author's reply
The practical joke went very wrong indeed, and the consequences went beyond the fact that Ithilden got mad.
"What a harsh way for the two brothers to recognise their own shortcomings and more importantly strengths" -- I thought this was very perceptive. Yes, they are each seeing some strengths and in themselves and in one another too. I love brave Legolas!
Dot
· 12 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
Omigod! I'm utterly freaked out, daw. I was expecting a spider or two at some stage but nothing that scary. Considering that I start shaking if I see even a tiny one in the house, you can imagine the state of me after reading that!
I have to say, I'm so impressed by our two elves, though. So brave...
I loved the start, with Legolas going over the previous day's events again. It's as though he *almost* realises how frightened Ithilden was and that was why he acted as he did, but he just can't quite seem to get past the humiliation of having his dagger taken and then being spanked!
I was definitely starting to get worried when the Home Guard turned up with more warriors than usual. It must have been difficult for Ithilden to remain and continue this trip when he knows what's happening and would probably much rather be at home where he can hear regular reports. I'm glad he apologised to Legolas. It had probably been troubling him that he lost his temper to that extent. I had to laugh at Legolas searching for something he was sorry for and picking "shut up"!
"There could be no harm in just following the tracks for a short distance." Ah, see, this is where I should have just scrolled down and read the last line!
What can I say? It was all amazingly and grotesquely well written! I'm glad you kept your spiders so similar to Tolkien's - even if it does freak me out more to know that they can even think, let alone talk!
I like the way "not a child" Legolas suddenly realised that he desperately wanted to stay near the comforting presence of his big brother. How horrifically frightening it must have been for him. Then when Ithilden's leg gave out...I think my heart stopped.
“I was making room for the snake, and I took out the things on top.” NO! Talk about a practical joke gone wrong! And to think that after the first chapter I thought it might be something to do with the flet. But no - Ithilden gets bitten by a spider and the antidote is back at camp. I can't cope with this at all...;)
I LOVE the way Legolas always talks to himself in Thranduil's voice when he is trying to calm himself down. I wonder does he still do it as an adult. Anyway, it seems to work! Legolas was incredibly brave in this chapter. He must have been petrified, yet he still obeys everything he's told when he really needs to.
Actually, I really admire the way Ithilden kept so calm in front of Legolas and issued him clear instructions and is more worried about frightening Legolas than about himself. I know he is a warrior but still, no-one wants to be lying half-dead under trees full of spiders. It seems to have taught him a little about what he can and cannot control, although it still nearly broke my heart when he remembers his mother and wonders if he's failed again.
Oh, look - Legolas' dagger came in handy! And yay, Legolas killed the spider!He's certainly well-trained if he's apologising to Ithilden for shooting so near him. It struck me as hilarious that Ithilden knows that Penntalion probably said this more to protect himself than anything else!
Wow, he took a lot of antidote. Is that going to knock him out? I really liked the end, with Ithilden suddenly seeing clearly that his brother is still just a child, not one of his warriors. It's quite sad, though, to think that he realises this and knows that this child is now going to have to take responsiblity for him.
Right, I have to go - why is lunch the shortest hour of the day?? So, what happens next?! If Thranduil senses that something is wrong with Ithilden, he must be frantic. I wouldn't be surprised if he appears through the trees in a minute. And his two guards, of course. Seriously, I can't wait to see how Legolas is going to get Ithilden back to camp and if poor Ithilden will be o.k. As long as there are no more spiders! *shudder*
Author's reply
You are so right! Legolas comes close but he doesn't quite get Ithilden yet, which is OK. He's a kid. He knows it was rude to tell Ithilden to shut up and that's what he settle for. Ithilden, on the other hand, had more ability to assess his own behavior. He just has to learn to be patient with Legolas, who is not so good at it yet.
I am so glad you found the spiders scary. Poor Legolas. I could see him digging his fingers into Ithilden's tunic and not letting go. But then he had to and he was so brave! Fellowship Legolas coming up (in a few hundred years!). It must have about killed Ithilden to send him off on his own. He is such a control freak.
I think that Thranduil is probably the central influence in the lives of all his sons. When Eilian was wounded in "Sacrifice under Shadow," Legolas used a "Thranduil voice" to make him leave the snow on his wounded leg, for instance.
My son had archery classes at school when he was maybe 9 or 10 and I concluded that the archery teacher was the bravest person I knew! Imagine putting bows and arrows in the hands of a bunch of kids. My son described one kid firing it up in the air and the arrow landing in the ground about 6 inches from the teacher's foot.
Jay of Lasgalen
· 12 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
Poor Ithilden! I knew spiders were going to be involved somehow - all those references to the antidote. Thank God Legolas didn't just throw the packets away, or forget where he'd put them!
I hope, for both their sakes, that the patrol returns quickly. Is Legolas about to save his other brother's life?
Jay
Author's reply
I was afraid I'd given myself away with all the references to antidote, but I had to do them to set things up. Karri's challenge was to write about a practical joke that went wrong, and this was about as wrong as I could think of.
Elena Tiriel
· 12 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
Oh, dear...
I don't think I should have read that chapter just before going to bed... going to have serious nightmares!
You really know how to get a person anxious!
- Barbara
Author's reply
You know Ted Nasmith who does the LOTR calendars? He has a truly horrible picture of Mirkwood spiders. For some reason, I can't get the link directly to that picture, but here's the link to the Nasmith site: http://www.tednasmith.com/main.html
That should take you to the page for The Hobbit. Then click on the second little picture from the left at the top of the page. It's scary!
vic
· 12 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
Dear Daw,
ARRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!!
How could you do this to me??? How could you???
Excuse me for a second, while my heart leaps back into my chest. What a chapter. I've been incredibly busy with work and uni, but I just had to spare a few minutes to send you a very quick review. Poor Ithilden, it must have been a tough night for him. I think he began to see that children, unlike warriors, do not obey simple commands. I'm sure when he's better, he will appreciate the job his Adar has done, all the more. I'm sure that Legolas will prove his worth, and show his older brother, and also his father, what he is really made of. He has a huge responsibility on his shoulders to care for his ailing brother, but I think he'll be great.
Ok, better go back to reading Ulysses... or may be I should re-read this chapter again... and again...and again...
Vic
Author's reply
I read "Ulysses"! I even liked reading "Ulysses." I assume we're talking Joyce and not Homer here, although I'm looking forward to seeing "Troy" some time soon. But it was a tough read, so you should be glad I got your heart pumping!
You're right that Ithilden is gaining far more appreciation for the good job Thranduil does with Legolas. It's true they need more time together, but Thranduil at least understands that Legolas is a child who needs something beyond simple commands to guide him.
My university finished its exams last week. I am doing the happy dance!!!
erunyauve
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
I love your spiders - they certainly act like Tolkien spiders! And it is certainly ironic that Ithilden has his moment of clarity in the midst of a crisis. I can imagine how frightening the situation would be for both of them - with Ithilden mostly concerned with protecting his little brother and Legolas wanting to be grown-up and yet terrified at the same time. This certainly isn't anything he is ready to face.
Author's reply
Nilmandra encouraged me to have the spiders talk. I was afraid it would be so incongruous that readers would laugh. That's OK for The Hobbit, which is a gloriously funny book, but it's not what I wanted here. People seem suitably freaked out, though.
Legolas isn't ready for this indeed. But when you put him and Ithilden together, they really do support one another, even in their present shaken condition.
French Pony
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
Goodness, Legolas does indeed spend quite a bit of time schlepping injured brothers around, doesn't he? This would explain why he was so relatively calm about dealing with Eilian and the poisoned hip wound, I suppose.
One thing about adolescents, they make a great deal of noise. Even adolescent Elves. Ithilden shouldn't worry about losing track of Legolas. Of course, he's got lots more to worry about now. And of course, now that he is forcibly slowed down, it occurs to him that Legolas is Just A Kid. Irony of ironies. You think Legolas picked up a few hints from a month in the infirmary? He's a smart cookie (if a noisy one), and listening to the healers was probably a good distraction from the smell of vomit.
Somehow, the spiders are even more horrible because they talk. I keep forgetting that they can talk, and it's a really creepy effect when they do.
Author's reply
I'm sitting here trying to think if I've ever had Legolas be the one who was seriously wounded and I just realized that I don't think I have. It's always been the brothers. How odd, given that he's younger and less experienced. I'll have to remedy that!
I expect that Legolas learned enough in the infirmary that he knew that big dose of antidote was unusual. And he's seen people with spider bites. Poor thing.
I was worried that the talking spiders would actually seem funny, which was NOT the effect I wanted, so I'm glad they're horrible.
Duchess
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
Whoa! Poor Legolas getting all caught up in the hunt and doing exactly what he wasn't supposed to do, again, and grabbed by spiders. *insert heebie jeebie fit here* I HATE spiders, awful things! Yuck!
Poor Ithilden too, getting bitten twice and worrying about his baby brother so. *shaking my head* So how do they get out of this one? I hope Legolas has to take care of Ithilden and does it well for as long as they have to wait on the Home Guard. :)
That's just my two cents worth though, you're the author and can do whatever you like. Just in case you're in doubt, I'm sure I'll like it too. lol
Author's reply
I don't even like the itsy bitsy spiders that wander into my house once in a while. Can you imagine facing a giant one? Ack! Tolkien sure knew what he was doing when he made up that horror. I wonder how he felt about spider?
Ithilden's has gulped down a mega-dose of antidote and did it almost immediately after the second bite. Maybe that will help. ;-)
rikki
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
Now the light bulb comes on! Ithilden finally realizes that Legolas is a child and this modifies his relationship to his brother as he speaks in the last paragraph. Legolas, on the other hand, goes from bratty little brother to find that strength and courage of a responsible elf to get to camp and back to his brother with the antidote and to shoot the spider that is attacking Ithilden. How interesting that Legolas calms down as he imagines his father's voice in his head.
I feel sorry for Ithilden, he is going to be one sick elf. And a ten year old elfling is basically going to have to move a dead weight adult to get his brother back to camp and then provide support until some of the Guard check on them. Now would be a good time for Thranduil to have a feeling that his two sons need help.
Author's reply
Poor Ithilden. He is so competent in most things but he's really been having trouble with his little brother and now he's physically helpless. Legolas, on the other hand, can still move around, but he's got a kid's brain and is scared to death. Fortunately for them both, he's brave. This is Legolas of the Fellowship in a teeny form. :-)
Manderly
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
Wow! You've left me breathless. Even though I've been expecting something to do with spiders (all those previous references to spider venom antidote surely were not put in to fill up the page), you still got my heart pounding. The poor brothers, what a way to strengthen the bond between them. I bet both of them will have nightmares after this. I still have to laugh at Ithilen though - bitten by a spider and he's worried about losing control over the situation. Talk about a control freak! Great chapter!
Author's reply
Yes! Your heart was pounding! Excellent!
Ithilden just can't help himself. He IS a control freak. It must kill him to send Legolas into danger on his own. Serves him right!
nessie
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
I KNEW one of them was going to get hurt! Aww, poor Legolas, having to see his poor oldest brother get attacked by spiders, and also poor him for getting caught in a web. Poor Ithilden for thinking something horrible happened to Legolas when he screamed. Lucky he was there in time to save him... I could just imagine how guilty Ithilden would have been if something happened to him. Poor princes of Mirkwood. I wonder what's going to happen now? You gotta update asap! The suspense is killing me!
~nessie~
Author's reply
It is hard to imagine how Ithilden would have coped if the spiders had killed Legolas. He already seems to feel responsible for everything under the sun! They both are in scary situations here.
And, Nessie, I *always* update asap. ;-)
Nilmandra
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
Does you husband know that there is a rebellious ten year old inside of you trying to get out? Legolas is very realistic in this whole chapter - his persepctive in the beginning all the way to the fear and panic we see with the spiders.
Ithilden's sudden reminder that Legolas is not a small warrior to be commanded was also well done. He is a disobedient, bratty......child. Now is when both brothers will find out what the other is made of.
Author's reply
That's a really good way to put it: the brothers will find out what the other is made of.
I love getting into kid Legolas's head. Not as much as into Celuwen's, but still!
LOTRFaith
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 5: A Brother's Help
ok now you are scaring me! lol..... Ithilden and Legolas.... Will Eilian come to the rescue? :-P Very interesting:-)
Author's reply
I can't let Eilian into this story because if I do he will steal it! He had his stage time in the last story. Ithilden and Legolas are going to have to cope on their own here. Scared is good!
Any
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
Phew! Poor Legolas, poor Ithilden! Legolas was so happy when they started out on this journey - finally some freedom for our favourite little elfling! No Ada commanding him around, no extra lessons for the prince while his friends are playing outside and no one who forbids him to sleep beneath the stars! And then he must learn that his brother is just as bossy as his Ada - setting rules and being overprotective and certainly overreacting here and there.
But poor Ithilden, too - After four years of hard work he's finally on leave, and surely he thought he'd be able to spend some quality time with his little brother. Certainly he didn't expect there'd be such a struggle for control. I feel sorry for him. But not too much, to be honest. I mean, hey, it is kinda funny that he waved off Thranduil's "warnings" and now he's experiencing first hand how difficult it can be to deal with a child. Hehe... ;)
I must say, that I can understand why Legolas is behaving so maddeningly. I wouldn't like being commanded around by my elder brother, either. Legolas wants to be free, he wants to have a normal childhood. But he hasn't. I mean, hey, shouldn't he normally have been thaught by his own Ada how to clean a fish? It must be so hard for him to see how many thing he misses in comparison to his friends just because his Ada is the king. And now, that he can finally have a bit of "normal family time" Ithilden constantly stops him and scolds him like a father. It must be so frustrating for Legolas that his family treats him like a baby, really. Okay, Legolas' way to express his frustration probably isn't the best or luckiest one, but, hey, he's a child after all. He's still learning...
Can't wait to read how they'll make peace now. :)
~Any
Author's reply
These two were fated to butt heads. I could see both their sides when I was writing. And yet, you are so right! Ithilden was just wrong, so very wrong, about how easy it would be to take care of a child. It was easy to be critical of Thranduil until he'd been responsible for Legolas for about 24 hours.
And I felt so bad. They were having such a good time fishing and then Legolas got to clean the fish and cook. And they had fun swimming together, but on the whole, they both wound up unhappy.
Make peace? Well, I guess eventually. ;-)
LKK
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
Bring on chapter 4.
LKK
*resigned to feeling turmoily*
Apparently, I'm so turmoiled that I can't even count straight! LOL I should have said, "Bring on chapter 5."
Author's reply
That's what I thought you meant. It's mostly drafted. I just have to ship it to Nilmandra the Cruel and let her abuse me for a while.
LKK
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
~sigh~
Real life is all turmoily for me right now. I keep telling myself that I don't need to add to the stress by knowingly reading something that will add to the stress. I know you write stressful stories; I suspect Legolas is going to behave extremely badly and Ithilien is going to get very angry at him. More family turmoil to come is what I predict. But I can't *not* read your story. No matter how much I tell myself that I should save it for a less overwhelmed time.
~sigh~
You're too good a writer for my own good, daw. I'm hooked again. Bring on chapter 4.
LKK
*resigned to feeling turmoily*
Author's reply
OK. I know it's wrong of me, but this made me laugh. I'm sorry!! I hope you feel better!
The thing is, I think of myself as writing these sort of domestic tales of family love, not the big epic things some other folks write. So I am actually pleased that someone finds the plots tense. (And again, I say I'm sorry!!)
White Wolf
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
Ups and downs, indeed. Legolas and Ithilden were so happy while they were swimming. And now things have gotten very tense between them. Of course, I know what a handful Legolas can be.
Author's reply
It must be very frustrating for them to have these good moments and then see them evaporate. Legolas is a handful indeed, as Ithilden is discovering. We'll have to see what he thinks now about how hard elflings are to manage vs. warriors,
insignia
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
Hi Daw
Really enjoyed your portrayal of siblings of (considerably) different ages and how they "work things out", or don't! You are very good at presenting sympathetically and realistically their own very different perspectives on the events which take place (I speak as no 2 of a family of 4).
Also enjoyed your version of how to hunt deer, not an area where I have any expertise at all so I was impressed by the detail you were able to provide.
So ... we have now had the practical joke - should I be linking the availability of antidote for spider venom with an open cut on Legolas's hand?
Looking forward, as ever, to the next chapter ...
insignia
Author's reply
It turns out there's a ton of stuff about bow hunting for deer on the internet. I have this thick notebook of stuff like that, because I am a city girl and have never eaten venison.
I'm glad you sympathized with both brothers. I was writing through Ithilden's eyes, but I wanted them both to be plausible from their own perspective. Readers seem to be unable to decide who's to blame, so I guess I succeeded. Yay!
Erendis
· 11 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
Ah, now we see how Legolas earned his title of "brat". ;) I like how truthfully you expose the joys and tensions of the little trip. It reminds me of my own family camping. We go from hysterical laughter and having the best of time, to harsh words, brooding and yelling. :P
But, we do learn some valuable lessons, and I guess that's what both of these royal siblings will be getting soon enough.
Good writing, daw.
Author's reply
See, I knew there was a reason I was horrified at the idea of camping. My department chair once drove his entire family (wife and five kids) in a van from Iowa to Alaska for a "vacation," camping along the way. If that had been us, Mounties would have found our dead bodies in the campsite with our hands around one another's throats.
Ah, yes. Lessons. What you get when you were hoping for something else!
Justafan
· 10 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
Heh, I'm loving it! Legolas is behaving so brattily towards Ithilden, but in his defense, Ithilden is rather overprotective and Legolas is just being a child. The grass snake part was a humorous touch :D
Author's reply
I'm glad you thought the snake was funny, Justafan! Ithilden disagrees with you, I'm afraid. Neither one of them had a very good time, sad to say.
sofia
· 10 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
Oh! Trouble in paradise... But do we even call it pardise, when they have been argueing just about the whole time?
Author's reply
Not the whole time! They had some nice moments fishing and cooking and swimming. But it sure seems like things went downhill fast, doesn't it?
tigerlily713
· 10 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
Legolas is quite the devil, isn't he? Poor kid! And poor Ithilden. But I suppose he's got to learn to be a father sometime, he might as well practice now. Wonderfully done; I eagerly await more! Lily
Author's reply
I like it that your sympathies go both ways, Lily. Both of them are having a hard time. And Ithilden's son should thank his lucky stars that Legolas (and presumably Eilian) were around before he was. Otherwise, neither he nor Ithilden might have survived his childhood.
tigerlily713
· 10 May 2004
· Chapter 3: Brothers
Legolas is being a bit of a nuisance, isn't he? I remember being that age and feeling like I was entitled to certain priviledges. Great chapter! Lily
Author's reply
Yes, it's the age. Nuisance is a nice mild word for it.
Ithildin
· 10 May 2004
· Chapter 4: Ups and Downs
Re: the interaction between bossy Ithilden and bratty Legolas: all I can say (as mom of nine, from young adults to little kids) is - you really pegged that scene. As unsatisfying as it is that they are at odds at the moment, it certainly was true-to-life. Well done.
___________________
“I am going to have to let him be a warrior, just as I did Eilian, Ithilden thought unhappily, but not yet. For now, I am going to keep him safe whether he likes it or not.”
___________________
Ai, this one hit home. I sometimes have thoughts like this myself when I’m watching my five-year-old – especially when he wants to play at soldier, like his big brother in the Air Force…
Keep writing,
Ithildin *(
Author's reply
A mother of nine?!!! I have to lie down just thinking about it. I once lived in a neighborhood with big old houses and big Catholic families. Across the street from us were three houses in a row with 11 kids, 12 kids, and 9 kids respectively. 30 kids in three houses. When we had a block party, we really had a party!! I have an only child. I can't imagine dealing with adolescence that many times.
And Ithilden is about to decide he can't do it once (or maybe twice, counting Eilian).
I like the little symbol by your name. Very appropriate.
tigerlily713
· 10 May 2004
· Chapter 2: Struggling with Weapons
Poor Ithilden. Alfirin was no doubt unimpressed my his display, and Pentallion is likely not so pleased either. Great chapter. I've got more to read if I want to catch up! Lily
Author's reply
Well now, Alfirin might have been impressed by *part* of his display! I know I was!