My Dear Bandobras by Le Rouret
RogerGamgee · 20 August 2004 · Chapter 22
Legolas as midwife...that image is priceless! LOL....good to see that elven maidens are not the only ones smitten by Legolas' charms. I'm afraid, though, that he STILL doesn't see how bad this match is. I've been torn myself between the urge to throttle this girl or simply push her off the nearest cliff. Send Bandobras to him quickly so he can change Legolas' mind about this, please! A well written chapter...keep up the great writing!
Aislynn Crowdaughter · 19 August 2004 · Chapter 21
Hmmm. Interesting conversation. The question that I contemplate now is: who wrote it down and put the parchment into that scroll in the library? didn't Laustaire wrote in her letter that she is occupying herself with reading in the library if she can not find anything else to do (like playing with her pony, and avoiding important meetings, and so on)? So, maybe, she will find some quite unwelcome lecture there, next time she looks for entertainment in reading scrolls... only that Seimiels and Durfinwens names are on the parchment, and so she may make a scene in demanding them punished for their impertinence. Of course, that would be a good thing, because it would give her away, and Legolas or Galas may finally see what a hopeless lackwit that girl is, and postpone the wedding. I hope. One thing is for sure, Laustaire is not gaining friends there. Aislynn
Nymh · 19 August 2004 · Chapter 21
Meh heh heh! The Infant is frolicking with her pony. Beautiful. But poor Seimiel ... I'm with Bodkin. Quickly, artist! Truss up the useless creature in a frou-frou gown, in fetching shades of True Colors.
Joana · 19 August 2004 · Chapter 21
A very interesting conversation and fortunately preserved on paper. More soon please! :)
Aislynn Crowdaughter · 19 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Hi! So, finally we hear the Bride-to-bes point of view. ouch! What a silly, haughty goose! She can admire her betrrothed and his great deed in the war of the ring, but she can feel slighted by the many Dwarven visitors of Legolas Dwarf-Friend? What did she learn about her groom to be, if she does not know that much about him, that he is infamus for befirnding and living among other races, and especially of his great friendship with guimli of Aglarond and Aragorn, king of Gondor? And she can't see the necessity to care properly for the demesne, because she herself apparently never did so befiore and thinks herself more important? And she will put a stop to Legolas gouing to everybody of his mortal friends and aquaintances,wenever they need him? I don't think so. methinks the girl has to learn a lot before she is ready to marry anyone, especially Legolas. Perhaps bandorbas counsel should be heeded and the wedding should be postponed a few yeaers, so that she could learn either to accept her betrothed openess to uncouth dwarves and mortals and learn more about what is asked from her by her future role of sharing into the ruling of Legolas fiefdom. Otherwise I see no great future for this wedding... and I hope they will both learn their mistake befor it is too late, or Legolas will be bound to a brainless chicken to the end of Arda, and said brainless chicken will be unhappily bound to him. Legolas needs an Elf-lady of his own age and experience and openness of mind, not a fifty-something princess on the proverbial pea! Oh, well, I sincerely hope he will not marry her in the end, it would be too ill-destined to contemplate! Aislynn
Duchess · 19 August 2004 · Chapter 21
You read my mind in wanting to hear from Seimiel's point of view and here we are. I just wish it weren't so short, but my, my, my, it IS telling. I definitely detect a secret love there. *sigh* Wish Legolas had noticed it long before now! "The Infant" is a scarily appropriate nickname for this lackwit, but degrading to actual infants at the same time. LOL Anyway, the Ladies made a mistake in not burning this bit of parchment, didn't they? I fear it will come to light at an entirely inauspicious moment, most especially since their names are on it. *worried sigh*
Ms. Whatsit · 19 August 2004 · Chapter 21
Heh. This is a tough style to pull off and I'm impressed that you managed it. Legolas will be humiliated, like it or not. But Seimiel and Durfinwen to the rescue! Something's got to give at this point. It would be nice if Laustairë suffered a quick and tragic death, but things seldom happen so neatly.
Lamiel · 19 August 2004 · Chapter 21
"The Infant." Maha! Excellent title for her, though personally I like "tramp," "nitwit," or "shameless spoiled hussy" even better. So all are not ignorant of the lady's true qualities. Hallelujah - there is hope! And I particularly like the line about Legolas becoming more like Thranduil with the passing years. Excellent.
Bodkin · 19 August 2004 · Chapter 21
You can't stop there!!!! Next chapter now!! I want to know the outcome.
Erin · 18 August 2004 · Chapter 20
I love Gimli's voice here. Personally, I think you should kidnap Bandy, his mother, Pippin, Diamons, and the rest of the Hobbits. Transplant the whole Shire! That would certainly shake up the young, twitterpated, ignorant goose. And I don't like her maid. Much too determined to saddle Legolas with her charge.
Duchess · 18 August 2004 · Chapter 20
Whoa! For Gimli to speak so plainly, things really MUST be awful and he's only going by what he's heard from his people. Sheesh! YES! Wonderful idea! Go kidnap Bandy AND his mother and let the lovely Pearl show the airhead up. LOL And when Bandy is encouraged to sit on Legolas' lap in front of Laustaire I hope the Elf sees her facial expression, if she's stupid enough to give herself away and she IS vapid enough, I dare say. Now about Nardane... If Seimiel says she is cunning in how she is convincing everyone of Laustaire's fitness to be Legolas' bride then I want HER killed off too! (Are there any more hungry Wargs around? On second thought, they might get indigestion from eating those two and I hate to see an animal in pain.) She'd better not DARE try to do anything bad to little Bandobras or Legolas will hurt her, female or not. Better yet, let Seimiel and the rest of the Ladies of the realm deal with those two pit vipers. No one will ever be bothered with them again, I warrant. LOL
Ms. Whatsit · 18 August 2004 · Chapter 20
I'm laughing at the notion of a hobbit Lady of Dol Galenehtar. I loved this letter! Gimli's tone and voice is perfect and I liked the way you showed his real feelings first, then his attempt to get reconciled to the situation. And I liked his admitting to missing Bandy at the end. *hugs Gimli* Now, I asked you before if this was going to be an unhappy Legomance, and you replied that you weren't into Legomances. This could mean a couple of things: 1)you're not into Legomances so you're going to write a miserable non-Legomance wherein Legolas doesn't love the girl, 2)you're not into Legomances so these two won't get married at all. Hmm. I hope it's the latter! And all my sympathies for having to write from Laustairë's POV.
Lamiel · 18 August 2004 · Chapter 20
Yay Gimli! I was wondering when we'd hear from him. This clan war he refers to intrigues me - a device to keep him away when Legolas needs him, I suppose, much like Thranduil's trolls, but it has interesting possibilities nonetheless. Alas, it seems that Nardane has a more sinister role in all of this than I had thought. A pity - she at least seemed to see her charge for what she is, but that she sees it and still conspires to entrap Legolas with the brat is unforgivable. It isn't surprising that the men of the court don't see it - they're liable to be blinded by the tramp's wiles, since manipulating men is, after all, the one thing she seems to be good at. They probably have no idea how much work goes into making things run smoothly day to day, and so having the lady lie about and preen to herself seems like the proper course of action to them. But what about Galelas? Surely he must be aware of what a burden she is. I like Gimli's idea of kidnapping Bandy's mother. Seems like the best course of action available, apart from my suggestion about the cliff.
Bodkin · 18 August 2004 · Chapter 20
Gimli might well be right that Bandobras would be the biggest help in getting rid of the bimbo. (Said bimbo clearly doesn't feel that she has to make any effort when it comes to impressing a) females and b) inferior races, does she?) Shame Legolas's mother's arrival is delayed - although the bimbo might try a bit harder to impress her. 'Seimiel did say unto Fríma and Ónin both that if she were constrained to listen yet one time more of Laustairë's wedding gown she would cut out the girl's tongue.' - Interesting idea - could it be arranged? 'Laustairë embodied to her the worst aspects of maidenhood, being childish, obtuse, unwise, vain, thoughtless, simple-minded, arrogant and tittery' -fairly comprehensive list of down-points. I especially love 'tittery'. Poor Gimli - not a lot of fun to watch the train running down the tracks, knowing the bridge has been washed out.
Ms. Whatsit · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Forgot to add that I like the way you show Laustairë's obliviousness--by having her report quite seriously what Nardanë said, while totally missing the insult therein!
Ms. Whatsit · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Ack! Horrible airhead! We need Bandy and Gimli to the rescue! >>It is most unseemly for Elves to labor in this fashion and when I am lady I shall impose a lighter rule and easier yoke upon them, and we shall have naught but feasts and parties and dances all the time. Oh no! How can Legolas be resigning himself to this, I wonder. I suppose she doesn't share all her dirty little thoughts with him, and so he can try to convince himself that he's ok with all of this even though he's not. I sense things coming to a head soon, though, now that it's been proven how wrong for Legolas this girl is.
Joana · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Well, there's not much I can add to other reviews so I'll just limit myself to support the general view on the matter. eheh Write as soon as you can! -Joana
Duchess · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Quoting your story... Well Nardanë has just come in with my gown, for she has as I requested of her added the other ribbons, and assures me no other lady in the assembly shall be dressed as ornately as I shall be; she can be so flattering when it pleases her! This ninny is so dense she doesn't recognize sarcasm when it slaps her in the face, does she? I do believe I see it here, or at least I hope I do. LOL Just read your other reviews to this chapter and I'm glad I'm not the only one who wants her dead. *giggle* We're clamoring for her blood, how will you react to this with story I wonder. Will you give us what we ask for, or will you turn the tables on us and make us feel sorry for the idiotic little drama queen? Please answer these questions with story as I really don't expect you to give me spoilers... Though I wouldn't turn my nose up at them! *snicker*
Nymh · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
I'm constrained by this chapter to leave lurkdom and beg. Please, oh please, dear author - off the trollop. Brilliant story. You've plainly hooked us all. *stalks off to plead with Bandobras's mother*
sheraiah · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Oh sweet Eru! This is proof positive that human males aren't the only ones who occasionally think with their genetalia! Legolas, honey, use the head on your shoulders instead of the one in your leggings before it's too late! On a more serious note, I'm really into this story. I've not yet read the prequel but have been motivated to do so simply by how well done this one is. Bravo, and keep up the good work! sheraiah
Lackwit · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Hmm- so Legolas will have to choose between Laustaire and Gimli. What I don't get is why Aragorn and Faramir, who "can see into the hearts of men", actually wholeheartedly support this marriage?! Ok, so she is a female Elf and not a man, but still-! The hobbits all realize their friend won't necessarily be happy. Foolish, foolish men. Is it primarily the political aspects that are attractive to them? BTW, does Legolas have the sea longing in your universe yet?
Lamiel · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Oh ho, so the little tramp speaks for herself for once! And lo, she proves verily the old saying of Mark Twain's: it is better to keep one's mouth shut and be suspected of stupidity, than to open it and remove all doubt. Not only is she feather-brained and vain (which we knew already) it is now clear that she's lazy, dense, spoiled, self-centered, and rude. "It is pleasant for me to sit back and watch his vassals as they scurry to and fro . . . everyone here is so busy, Kalamiril, so that even watching them I am exhausted and need to take to my couch." Oh, poor baby! So it is more obvious than ever that this twit is not only completely unqualified to oversee a kingdom, she has no intention of ever learning the skill. What was Cirdan thinking? Even Legolas' mother couldn't possible believe this brat is suitable for Legolas. She'll just add to the workload of everyone else, and not help in the slightest. Honestly, these schoolgirl fantasies of sitting up on the dais and looking pretty in front of everyone . . . which just goes to show how she really has not the slightest clue about who Legolas is, if she fancies for a moment that he would consent to that. Although, granted, the Elf worship was very nice. Especially the bit about his hands . . . I confess to having a weakness for his hands. But it isn't worth it! If only Gimli and Bandobras would show up, I'm sure she'd be so rude that she'd give herself away, and even Legolas' fogged brain would be forced to recognize her for what she is. Tramp.
Duchess · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Oh my gosh... One of your other reviewers was so RIGHT. This Laustaire needs to be pushed off a cliff. Is there no bad guy left that can come along and do this for us? The little Twit would be MUCH happier in the Halls of Mandos, really, it would be doing her (and all of Arda) a favor! What an absolutely self absorbed, spoiled, vain, delusional and RACIST moron!!! Legolas CANNOT marry her, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease let his mother come along and see how lacking this nitwit is and put a stop to it? Bandy could get her to see the faults, I'm sure and tying dear Legolas down to THAT will only ADD to all his burdens, not relieve him of any! If she is reacting that badly to the men and Dwarves, how in the world will she react to the exuberant hugs Bandobras will get and the fact that Legolas will want to sing the Hobbit to sleep like he used to when he comes back to be by his master's side? Oh, I can see it now, she'll try to treat him like a slave or something and that will just be the last straw... won't it? *whimper* *wanting to strangle the character now* You are doing a marvelous job of making your readers hate this, this... I WILL not call her an Elf because she certain is NOT worthy of being considered a member of that wonderful race. Ugh!
LOTR lover · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Le Rouret, please rescue Legolas from this horrible fate! He's a hero, for pity's sake--don't let this childish creature ruin his life. You're the author--do something!
Bodkin · 17 August 2004 · Chapter 19
Is there a single word that describes how mind-numbingly shallow and conceited this little piece of fluff is? Come, you little brain-dead moron, mortally insult Gimli, Aragorn, Faramir, Bandobras and all the other important people in Legolas's life, so he can see you for the insignificant twerp that you are before it is too late. Spend all his life in fancy clothing, dancing and singing the bimbo's praises - I can't see that satisfying Legolas for too long.