Reviews (321)

perelleth · 9 April 2005 · Chapter 8: Caught in the Ruins

Ob, boy! that was so sad! maybe I'm particularly sad today, but the whole chapter brought tears to my eyes! Anyway, I'm thankful you've been so "swift and clean" in the telling. It was more than clear with such brief strokes, and perhaps the conciseness helped it feel so absolute and so sad. That's how life -and death- is. But poor, poor Legolas, I had to smile at how he had pictured their life together... Galelas disorientation was painful too, how he went back to the other dragon incident and the things that were worrying him then and now coming to surface...poor lad, he truly needed someone's support and praise, and if you don't get that at home, you may become a bitter, resentful and sad creature... I fear Legolas has a long way to recovery...no wonder you were reluctant to get done with this, writting this down must have been a bit difficult, I'd say...mainly to get rid of the mood...I very much like (and apprecciate) that you never wallow in anguish but manage to convey strong feelings with precise characterizations and settings. I'm learning a lot!

Dot · 9 April 2005 · Chapter 8: Caught in the Ruins

Oh lord. I admit it – I skimmed down through it to see Legolas’ reaction. And now I’m having trouble trying to focus on the rest of it…! So please forgive any incoherency and attribute it to your ability to play with my emotions ;-) What a horrific image of the whole place collapsing around him. I found I was struggling a little to breathe myself in reading about the dust and dirt and showering rocks. The sense of confusion throughout the whole chapter was so skilfully written. I’m slightly guilty about it but the person I actually felt most for was Beliond. He must have been frantic at first, not knowing where Legolas was and if he was still alive, and then so worried for Legolas when he heard about Tuilinn. I was just fascinated by Legolas’ train of thought and rather, uh, loose grip on reality. The humour about Beliond and the child learning bad words that would have to be explained to his parents, “assuming, of course, that the child still had parents”, had an almost surreal quality to it. I think my own heart stopped right along with Legolas’ when he spotted Tuilinn’s hand. The next moment was just so very sad. There’s something very poignant about her looking so peaceful in death, but the part that undid me was the way he suddenly realised that he could no longer feel her presence, that she was gone. It’s an amazing, heart-breaking idea too that some part of him seems to try to seek her, wanting her to come back. “I am sorry, Legolas.” *sob* Beliond will suffer right along with him, I think. Oh, how my heart went out to Legolas as he tries to pull himself away from Tuilinn and focus his mind so that he can help Galelas. For a second I was a bit confused too as to what Galelas was talking about!! It’s kind of sad that he still remembers, and in such a bitter way, how Eilian reacted when Legolas was injured all those years ago. At least it helped bring Legolas’ thoughts away from Tuilinn. I was glad to see that in his frustration he reacted to Galelas’ petulance and bitterness with the truth, rather than arguing or brushing him off. Maybe he should have told Galelas that he thought “he was a thousand times better than Tinár”, but Galelas is probably most reassured by what Ithilden, and especially Eilian, think. He’s just witnessed too how Legolas’ world is not always the easy, protected one he seems to think it is. I genuinely still have tears in my eyes reading the part where Legolas allows himself to imagine what life would have been like with Tuilinn. I thought the saddest part was when he pictures Thranduil kissing her brow and welcoming her into their family and home, because that’s exactly what would have happened. It’s such a Thranduil gesture that I can easily imagine it myself. There’s Fyndil! Poor guy. Of course, he must be heartbroken too. But sometimes the closer we are to pain, the harder it is for us to express it. And Legolas is still far too stunned and incapable of dealing with what’s happened. You know, in some ways I’m glad for Beliond that there are so many practicalities to be taken care of – looking after Legolas for now can be a matter of caring for his injuries and getting him out of there. There’ll be time for feelings of helplessness later. But he’s so wonderfully gentle and even when he speaks roughly we all, including a dazed Legolas, know that it’s masking his genuine care for his charge. “And suddenly, tears were washing the grit from his eyes and a shuddering sob shook him. And to his surprise, the thought that was uppermost in his mind was, That poor little boy!” I guess that’s what it takes sometimes, for something else, even something like the image of a small child with no parents and the one who had tried to save him now gone, to allow us to release emotions and free us from the numbness that comes with overwhelming pain and grief. *sigh* I’ve probably missed half of this. I’m feeling rather dazed myself – I’ll have to come back and read it again! It’s a truly great job, daw. And you’re so good to us for posting this so quickly. Would it be too much to ask for more soon?! I’m just dying to see what happens next… :-)

LOTRFaith · 9 April 2005 · Chapter 8: Caught in the Ruins

Oh my gosh... I was nearly bawling all over my keyboard... Poor Legolas. To have found his love and then lost her... I am glad though that Galelas and Legolas have started to come to a reconciliation. (sp?) Sigh... Poor Legolas...

Bodkin · 9 April 2005 · Chapter 8: Caught in the Ruins

Boy, is it fortunate that Beliond was so insistent - and that Galelas was hurt and needed help, because I think young Legolas was on the point of drifting away from us there for a moment. It's probably also a good thing that his bond with Tuilinn was not yet any deeper - or his attempt to find her might well have led him to Mandos's Halls. It's good to see that crisis and shock and despair enabled Legolas to say some things to Galelas that, if he remembers them, might well serve to improve their relationship. And, unfortunately, seeing Legolas heart-broken by Tuilinn's death will prove to Galelas that being a golden boy doesn't save him from pain. And thank goodness for Beliond. He may be cranky, but he's just what you need when your world has ended.

perelleth · 8 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

I'm breathless! And sore, for sitting at the edge of my chair for the whole chapter! I re-read "the hobbit" just some weeks ago, when I got to "Tangled Web", and this time, the ruins of Dale caught my attention particularly. Maybe because since last time I had read "the hobbit" I have seen things that could resemble that (settlements after a virulent volcanic eruption...) and I tried to picture that whole scene... You did a wonderful and detailed job! I loved it when the dwarf turned out to be Thror!. Legolas was smart, recognizing the power around this dwarf and bowing to him, and then I liked how he was able to see him as a creature who had lost that much! Thoughtful Legolas! Then the bells ringing, and Girion's eldest son so dutifully and bravely taking charge, the chaos and confusion, it was wonderfully done, at least for me! I think that apart from Eilian, I may be the only other person who likes Galelas a bit... I'm glad he's behaving. As you say, he and Legolas will never be buddies (YOU did not give him time to get to that, hehe..) but... he's not altogether evil, only in Legolas' presence. And then, the building collapses! How long do you think they can hold on without fresh air? I mean, I've been away for the most part of this week but...I don't think they can resist for far longer...;-) Eagerly waiting for more, as usual! ;-)

Brazgirl · 7 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

OH MY GOD! WHAT A CRUEL CLIFF!!! oh... Right. Wow, this chapter was full of action, and angst. I know you kill your characters when you plan and I am so nervous about Tuilinn... I wonder what will happen now! I so want to know! Anyway, very well written chapter. I could imagine people's despair and the burnt city. Legolas was a crazy elf there, when the dragon approached! No wonder Beliond cried after him. Oh Daw! I am a curious woman!!!

White Wolf · 7 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

You did a good job of describing the devastation wrought by the dragon. You could just feel the peoples' terror and Legolas's anxiety over wanting to find Tuilinn. Beliond must have had a near heart attack when Legolas darted out after her. Great action chapter. That was a nice little cliffy you left.

Alkja · 7 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Great chapter, Daw! Reading the parts about the fleeing populace of Dale was almost like seeing a documentary. Your descriptions are so powerful! I am pretty worried about Tuilinn's fate, the odds are not much in her favor. Though I admit I am worried more for Legolas's possible heartbreak then for her life itself: it's not I don't like her, because I do (even though Legomances usually make me run for the hills), it's just that Legolas is Legolas while I don't really know Tuilinn all that well yet. Does this make me a horrible person? Poor Beliond! And he thought that love makes a warrior more careful! I'll bet he doesn't think so now... Still, it was great seeing him in Ada-mode. And what is the rest of the family going to say? They thought the new post would be all about relax... and "the baby" of the family has managed to fall in love and in mortal danger in the blink of an eye! Write fast, you can't leave us with a cliffhanger like this! Alkja

LOTR lover · 7 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Good action! You really scored on this one, daw. The action is smooth and Legolas's emotions are well written. His interactions with the Dwarves, with his own Elves and with Gwigon ring very true, as does his fear for Tuilinn. Beliond's reaction to Legolas's leap out of cover is priceless. And of course the cliffhanger is just the perfect place to stop. You know I'm waiting with bated breath for the next chapter, don't you?

Alice · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Very, very exciting chapter. It was tense and suspenseful all the way through. The sense of destruction and just what a catastrophe Smaug's attack was are really strong. So, good chapter even if you did end it with a cliff hanger. Legolas is about to take a hard blow isn't he? No don't tell me, I'll just find out when you update, which hopefully will be soon. Though I have to admit I'm somewhat relunctant for you to update, because as long as you haven't, I can still hope about Tuilinn's fate. This has been a very dramatic story for us long time readers. We all have a very good idea of what is going to happen, and yet none of us can bear to look away. It's making the story tense. I enjoyed the last chapter also, the calm before the storm. I love Eilian's letters. I'm also enjoying hearing about the settlers who we met in Spring Awakenings. Rodion joining the training sessions would not surprise me one bit. Hopefully the settlers will never have to use their new skills though. And hopefully Celuwen won't find out about the training sessions. I suspect these are foolish hopes however. Oh, and it's really nice seeing Galelas and Legolas grow. They're actually sort of having peaceful moments. Not many, but they're there. There was a grateful glance! And a compliment! Also a no doubt revealing overheard conversation. Progress is being made. Which is no doubt a relief to Elorfin. I look forward to the next chapter greatly. Not only is this one of your more exciting stories to date, it also has some of my favorite original characters in it. I'm loving Sinnarn here. Poor "Young one". Bet that gets old after the first century or so of life. Update soon!

meckinock · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

This chapter came with a soundtrack. I can still hear the screams and the swoosh of the dragon's wings and the roar of the fire. Very vivid. The chaos and terror were palpable. Ow, and a screaming maiden snatched up by the dragon -- you didn't pull any punches, did you? I felt sorry for Legolas. He really just has one thing on his mind, but he's working hard to do his duty anyway. I liked his belated realization that he should have offered the Dwarves a little more sympathy. Another thing I liked was his observation that normally he would have taken offense at the Man's disdain of the size of his patrol. Six Elven warriors can do a lot of damage, indeed. Galelas was nicely underplayed. He's all business when the chips are down. But geez, it had to be Tuilinn running right down the middle of the street in the flight path of the dragon, and carrying a baby, yet! Beliond must have had a heart attack when Legolas jumped out to grab her. You know you can't kill the baby, right, Daw?

Effigy · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

I thought your story started off "Oh snap" for some reason. That's quite a cliffhanger you left us with. I hope everyone is ok. Especially Galelas. I have to say that he is one of my favorite OCs you have. I don't know why. It's cute how Legolas rushes to save Tuilinn, but it's sad that this won't turn out well for him. There, there Legolas. Don't be sad. It's ok. I'll take care of you. Sure you can stay the night. You'll find someone better soon. ;-) Very well written.

sofia · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

This chapter has had me so so worried about Tuilinn and Fyndil! I am glad that he found Tuilinn but what happened to Fyndil, and I hope they are all alright after the roof collapsed on them. Can't wait for more!!! -sofia

Ms. Whatsit · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Oh, no! I was afraid of something like this happening. I like the image of Galelas firing arrows at the dragons despite all odds, though. And Beliond thinking he was a fool.

Jay of Lasgalen · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Oh my word, Daw - that was tense!! I'll start at the beginning. I liked Beliond admitting he didn't know what was happening, but actually letting Legolas do his job. He's come a long way. Next, I liked this line: 'The bearing of the Dwarf in the lead looked familiar to Legolas, and suddenly he realized that it reminded him of Thranduil’s.' What would Thranduil say to that? Being compared to a dwarf? Once they get to Dale, the action is amazing. And Galelas gives Legolas a grateful look? Wonders will never cease! I do hope you're not going to kill young Vanduil as well. I like him. I'm glad that Legolas got to see Tuilinn again, but I can't help thinking of the poor girl carried off by Smaug, who was keeping him 'busy' :( Good ending - you don't usually do cliff hangers - but I need to know if the next chapter needs a tissue warning! Jay

Alison H · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

I read this heart-stopping chapter before going to work and I couldn't wait to get home to read it again! The tension throughout was relentless and I loved every minute! Legolas was in command despite being scared almost out of his wits thinking about Tuillion and he was good for the other elves, I think.He was the leader they needed. Ahh, the roof caved in! How could you leave it like that, Daw! I will be biting my nails until the next update when, hopefully, a certain other son of Thranduill, may make an appearance--please? Wonderful story! Ali.

Dot · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Um, I think there may be something wrong with SOA because I’m not seeing the whole chapter… I just know you didn’t mean to leave it there…;-) This is incredible! My pulse is still racing. Legolas must have been just sick with fear. How far are they from the rest of the patrol? I was surprised that there was no suggestion that they should get the rest of them. I do like the way they all immediately, unquestioningly, follow Legolas in the face of such a horrific sight before them. And those Dwarves! My heart went out to them. I’d never have remembered about Thorin fleeing with his family. I take it he’s one of the Dwarf-children? I vaguely remember something about Balin being there too. I really like Thrór here. I thought it was a great moment when Legolas recognises a certain regal bearing to him and speaks to him with appropriate respect. Thrór’s courtesy in the midst of such a disaster was quite touching too. How unspeakably terrible for them to be experiencing this after being driven from their home by dragons before. Poor Legolas doesn’t seem to be able to think very straight, although he’s still doing a good job as lieutenant. I thought his almost overwhelming fear really came across when he realises that he simply can’t think about anyone else’s loss right now, so great is his worry and apprehension. I don’t know what to say about the scenes they encountered coming towards Dale and in the town itself. It was all so amazingly, horrible vivid. I don’t think my brain even took in half of it. Apart from the overall sense of destruction and panic, I thought you did such a great job in showing the terror of the people and the dreadful impact of what was happening in the little encounters with some of the people of Dale. The hysterical woman, the distressed man, the older man who wouldn’t let go of his wife’s shawl… It almost felt wrong to be watching such anguish and desperation, but I was glued to it. I can see why Sinnarn was so upset at the sight of the woman’s grief. I must say, I thought the descriptions of the sounds around them were particularly effective. There’s such a sense of chaos to it all. Poor Vanduil. He seems completely overcome by all this. He’s lucky he has Galelas and even Legolas can step back from his own worries and take a moment to reassure him. He’s not doing too badly, though. But if he survives this – and I couldn’t cope with the thought of Galelas losing him – he’ll need to be sent home on a long leave, I think… I like Gwigon too. He seems very calm and an experienced soldier. At least someone appears to be thinking clearly. Pity he doesn’t survive. Or I presume he doesn’t. But at least the mother and younger brother are on their way to safety or we’d have no Bard! Tuilinn! Legolas seemed so sure that he felt her presence that I kept waiting for her to appear. Of course, she has to have a child with her! My heart was in my mouth when Legolas made a dash for her. What a brave, foolish thing to do. Beliond must be at his wits end trying to deal with a frantic, unpredictable Legolas, who seems to be taking absolutely no notice of him whatsoever. I laughed, slightly hysterically, when Legolas shoved the child into his arms. It was an almost surreal moment to see Beliond’s ada instinct take over. The roof fell in?? And is Galelas still outside?? Are Sinnarn and Nithron safe down by the river? Where’s Fyndil? Aargh. How can you leave it there?!!

Nilmandra · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Well, this is one of those times when I am extremely glad to only read and write about Middle-earth, and not live in it. Dragons roasting a town and carrying off maidens is a very unpleasant thought. I do like how calm Gwigon was - he came across as a tried and true soldier, one doing all he can despite the hopelessness of it, thinking rationally and with pirorities intact about how to save their people. I do like the image of Beliond crooning and jiggling the child.

thechevin · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Oh but this was so terrifying I found I could not bear to read it but couldn't stop either I was so caught up in the horror of the attack and Legolas' worry. You have managed to make the whole terrifying thing so real the panic and pain tremendous writing and then just when I am thinking things could not get worse you leave us with our hearts in our mouths yet again!

Bodkin · 6 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Can you feel all the pulses racing as your readers rush through this chapter? It's wonderful - and is a perfect counterpoint to the serenity of some of the earlier part of the tale. Legolas would have raced to Dale on his own, regardless - so it's just as well that he is the lieutenant and his duty also leads him to find out what has happened on the mountain. And to meet Dwarves - that would have been hard enough, considering his last experience with the race and dragons, but to realise that, with Vanduil exchanged for Amdir, he was with warriors who were there then must have been chilling. I love it that he can recognise authority at a glance - and that he and Thror are both wary enough to keep some of the party back. 'For a second, Legolas looked after him, seeing not a member of an untrustworthy race, but someone who had lost nearly everything he had.' Good -I'm glad he had that moment of vision: hopefully it will come back to him later. (And maybe it contributes to Sinnarn's interest in dwarves. Until after the Event with 13 of the little blighters, which might well have soured him on the race.) I love the song of the bells echoing in the town, warning of danger, the steam, the fires - it's so dramatic to see and smell and feel and hear. Appeals to all the senses in just the right proportions. Vanduil has a tendency to freeze at inconvenient moments - which I hope he will overcome QUICKLY - or the fate of the curled-up hedgehog in the headlights of a car might well be his. And the maiden! Not only horrifying in itself, but raising a very real fear in Legolas's mind. (How do you think dragons react if they discover they are not maidens? Do you think he spits them out?) Gwigon shouldn't dismiss the half dozen Wood Elves too quickly - he is, after all, facing one of the few (if not only) people in Middle Earth who has actually killed a dragon. The desolation of Dale is frightening - knowing how few survive and seeing how helpless they are against Smaug. 'his nephew’s distressed face as Sinnarn put out a hand to try to soothe the hysterical woman' Has Sinnarn just developed a mission to protect the weak and defend the defenceless? His determined light-heartedness and frivolous behaviour has been almost because he refused to see what he could do against the forces that the Wood Elves face. But this kind of traumatic event makes it essential to take a stand of some sort, and I can see it changing him. And Tuilinn - she would come running down the street with a maiden-hungry dragon in the air and a child in her arms. Just as Legolas would leap to the rescue and tuck her into as much shelter as they can find. But the roof? Oh dear. It doesn't look good. Although I'm sure she has plenty of other opportunities to get herself into trouble. But Galelas! The lad is performing well. He's protecting Vanduil and defending Eilian's little brother - and almost looking at Legolas approvingly as the king's youngest shows that he's not such a bad leader. But Beliond (and Nithron) must be having kittens. This was not what Ithilden or Thranduil had in mind when they tucked the two youngest away in the Northern patrol. I hope you don't have too much on at work at the moment - this is not a story that will be better stretched over a long period. More. Soon. Please.

esamen · 5 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Oh, I was so happy to see that you had updated! And what a fantastic ride this chapter takes us on! Wow, woman, you can write. Every word is perfectly placed. The action, description -- everything is just amazing. I can't stop praising every little detail -- Thror, the dragon, the bowshots, Legolas's tenuous mental bond with Tuillin, everything. I'm sure that everyone else is hollering in frustration at the nerve-wracking ending! But I am laughing my head off, because in my own story I'm stopped at a cliffhanger moment as well. In fact, some walls come down on my own characters in my story. It was just too funny to read such a similar scene in yours. I will email you my new chapter tomorrow and you'll see what I mean. The chapter's only halfway written, but this section ends on a cliffhanger, and it is only fair to make you read it after what you have done to all of us. Oh, please post the next chapter soon, and I hope that Legolas comes in for lots of heroic, sacrificial action and heartfelt h/c before the story is over. Have I ever said that before? Just reminding you. :-P Happy typing!

Frodo3791 · 5 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

I probably should be used to this with you, but... ah! The cliffhangers! They hurt! This was a very exciting chapter, and you definitly left it in the midst of an excitement. Just when I got over my surprise that Tuilinn was still alive, rocks fall down on her... and everybody else! I can't wait for you to continue! -Micah

Elemmíre · 5 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Aghhhhh! You do know how to write a cliffhanger! This is a great story, I hope we get the next chapter soon! Elemmíre

Vanyalindie · 5 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Arrghh! Nooo! Dont stop yet! Oh gosh, daw! How can you do this! In my anxiousness I sent off a review before I had typed anything into it! lol Im a long-time lurker-reader of yours, and I simply had to leave a review (quick and short) for you this time. The sense of urgency in this chapter is very evident and well-paced in my opinion. I thought it a little odd that Legolas would meet Thror, but it gave a nice twist to things, I think I like it. lol I also like how you've described the victims'reactions and fear, Legolas especially. I feel terribly sorry for him and I am right along with him searching for Tuilinn right now lol. Now, I simply wish that you'd hurry up and resolve this before I go mad! :D Great chapter, ~vanya (VG)

Yanic · 5 April 2005 · Chapter 7: Dale

Oh my gosh! I was actually on the edge of my seat! Reading that chapter was like watching a movie in my head, I could feel the panic of the people, it felt like I was actually there. Well done! I loved the interaction with the dwarves and the townspeople, it really enhanced the chapter. I see Tuilinn is still alive... no blonde elflings then. I really liked how Legolas ran to save her, though. He completely ignored his own safety for her. It was touching. And Beliond with the baby! Oh it was great, the old crank-pot is too cute with kids! Loved it! I do hope you update soon though, it seems Legolas always gets trapped in rubble when dragons come, I can only hope he isn't oo badly banged up. I know I'm gushing a bit but its always a treasure to read a new chapter, in fact I'm off to read it again!