Flowers, Gems And Estella - Chapter XXII
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It was four days after Estella had been rescued from the forest that she looked out the circular window of the Brandybucks’ living room to see a traveler making their way to the hole – he was on horseback, a cocoa-brown colored pony that Estella recognized as her brother’s, and she gave an excited gasp when she realized who it was. Fredegar dismounted the pony without hitching it up, leaving it to graze in the front lawn and to be retrieved later in the onion patch by Doderic and Ilberic – he made his way to the house and entered immediately after knocking sharply on the door.
“What in the name of the Shire are you doing gallivanting out in the Old Forest at night?” he asked of her while holding her in a strong hug, “Thank goodness Celandine had the sense to write to me, especially since you didn’t feel it necessary to tell your own brother how you were doing!” He had a stern look on his face, but his eyes were alight with love, and he was obviously very happy to his sister after so long.
“It’s my own fault, I admit,” she said, smiling guiltily and shrugging her shoulders, “But nonetheless, it’s made you come to visit me, so this can’t be all bad,” she said, pointing down at her bandaged ankle. She stood slowly, gingerly testing it – it had healed much, and was making excellent progress, and she hobbled across, wincing only once in miniscule pain.
“Well, I was planning to come for Merry’s birthday party, and since it’s just in a couple days, I might as well stay here in Buckland until then – I’ll probably go over to see Merry tomorrow, to thank him for rescuing my sister from the jaws of death,” he said smiling, and patted Estella softly on the shoulder.
“Oh, yes,” Celandine now said, speaking up for the first time since Fredegar had come through the door, “Yes, Merry was quite brave to rescue Estella, and I know that, like us, he wouldn’t want to lose her, as he’s very fond of her, you see.”
“Eh?” Fredegar said, looking from Celandine to Estella, “And what exactly does this mean, my little sister?”
Estella shoved Celandine jovially, and grabbed Fredegar by the arm, steering him towards the door. “Thank you, Celandine,” she said, and shut the door behind them.
Outside it was warm, with the summer sun beating down on them, playing light tricks with the gently running stream and reflecting waves on the faces of the two hobbits who came to sit beside it.
“I haven’t seen Mentha or Melilot since I’ve been here – I figured they’d follow you around like little lost puppies,” Fredegar said to her.
“Well, I think they’ve been distracted recently – by whom, I’m not sure – but I haven’t seen too much of them. Perhaps they’ve got a lad over at their house, but I wouldn’t know – I’ve been here ever since I sprained my ankle.”
“And it was Merry who bravely came to your rescue, because he – how did she put it – is fond of you?” he said slyly, laughter in his eyes.
She too smiled at this, nudging him softly in the shoulder. “Well, you would have done the same for me, wouldn’t you? Aren’t you at all fond of me?”
“Of course I would rescue you, and of course I am fond of you – but I am your brother, I have to be as such or Mother will punish me – not to mention the guilt that my conscience will bear,” he said, laying his head back on the grass, “But seeing as how Merry is not your brother, to say that he is fond of you may bring to mind other implications of the phrase, if you know what I mean.”
“Well, I suppose it all has to do with – with something that Celandine said to me, a while back.”
“And that would be?” he asked pensively.
“At the Midsummer’s Festival, she got drunk – Doderic and Ilberic switched her mug though!” she said quickly, noting the look on her brother’s face, “It really wasn’t her fault at all – but she told me something, something I don’t think she would have said if she were sober.”
“About Merry.”
Estella nodded. “About Merry, yes. She said that he – that he liked me. Really liked me.”
“As in – in love with you?”
Estella nodded, saying nothing. Fredegar fell silent as well, then asked her, “How do you feel about it?” in a calm tone.
“You mean you’re not upset – at him?”
“Why would I be?”
“Well, I’m your only sister, and I’d have thought that you wanted to protect me – not that I need protection in this situation. But I guess it’s that – well, in a lot of books that I’ve read, stories about love and romance, that when a lad falls in love with a lass, her brother usually doesn’t approve of it.”
“Do you want me to be angry about it?”
“No! I mean I am very glad that you’re taking this well, and not storming off to chop his head off or something – it just surprised me was all.”
“Yes, I can see how it might – but in those stories, the brother usually does not know the lad whose heart his sister owns. Of course, I am wondering why Merry hasn’t spoken to me about it – perhaps afraid I might tell you, in which case in would not matter since you already know – but I am in no way angry about it. I mean you don’t despise the lasses I mingle with, do you? I couldn’t possibly be angry and call myself your brother. How could I expect you to like the lasses I court, if I didn’t do the same for the lads you like?”
“I didn’t say I liked him as well.”
“But that’s beyond my point, of course – I know Merry, and I know he has good intentions deep down, even if he doesn’t show them on the surface. Now the question is, how do you feel about it?”
Estella fell silent here, looking out over the landscape in though. “At first, I suppose, I said I didn’t like him that way – only as a friend. I felt bad, because I knew it would hurt his feelings, but no matter what that wouldn’t be a reason for returning those feelings, if I ever did.”
“That’s very profound of you.”
“Doderic and Ilberic told me that. But it was in the forest, when I was alone and cold, and injured – I felt so afraid. Like there was no hope left at all in the world, and a fog of dread was permanently suspended over my vision. And when he came – well, when you and Papa hug me, I feel safe, and loved, because the two of you do love me, of course. It was like that when Merry came to rescue me – the fog lifted away, and I saw him for what he really was. Not a juvenile miscreant – but a kind lad, with a good heart, who was only looking out for me – someone who loved me, because there was no other way for him to feel. I felt safe with him, and I felt as if there were no other way for me to feel either, than to love him for who he was, and what he was doing at that moment, which was putting his life in danger to rescue mine.” Her eyes were shrouded over in with fog – feelings and memories that her brother knew she was contemplating.
“Fredegar,” she said next, “I don’t think it’s because I feel sorry – no, that’s wrong. I don’t think, I know. I know that I love him, and I know that it’s not because I feel sorry for him, but because I find it impossible to feel sorry for him – because to do so would taint him, and his sense of bravery and honor that override all other emotions.” Her voice trailed off, and Fredegar knew that nothing now lay between her and the truth.
“Now doesn’t it feel good to get that off your chest?” he asked.
“Extremely,” she said, her voice carrying a sense of relief, as if a great weight had been removed from her shoulders, “And I suppose the next thing you’re going to say is that I should tell him?”
“Well, you don’t have to – but if you really want to, my suggestion would be at the upcoming birthday party in his name. The colored decorations should make for quite the backdrop for your declaration of undying love,” he said dramatically, “My sentiments to the both of you, in the hopes that you live a happy and prosperous life together.”
“Now, Fatty, I think it’s a bit early to be sending out the wedding invitations just yet – who knows if it’ll even last that long? He may not even want to be married,” she said.
“Ah, Estella, you offend yourself, for how could any lad look upon your divine beauty and not be overcome by the urge to add his name onto your own?” he said standing up, his hand upon the chest to achieve the full theatrical effect of his statement. He took her hand and pulled her up to stand beside him. “Seriously though, what you say is untrue – Merry is a good lad, and if his intentions were so uncouth I would feel no regret to smite him where he stands! Which I don’t have any plans to do, mind you – you only bring yourself down by saying such things, Estella. Give love a chance and you will be rewarded tenfold.”
“You really have that much faith in a relationship that has yet to exist?”
“I couldn’t call myself your brother if I didn’t.” They trekked back to the hole together, watching the sun slowly set over the beautiful expanse.