Poor Eilian. He might not be as shadowed as Gelmir, but he's certainly not far from it. That Shadow is so ... tangible, and polluting. And being in the midst of such a clutch of it as poor Fithral was dragged to a fate that left him so small ... it must have made his death so much worse than simple death in battle. The tunnels beneath the trees are such a likely - and horrible - idea. And I'm glad Eilian came independently to a decision that wouldn't infuriate Maltanaur. While he showed yet again how close he is to the forest - he almost smells shifts in the currents of air - and this must make its darkening hurt him. Yet he knows himself well enough to be genuinely glad not to be burdened with Ithilden's role.
His mother is so good for him. She asks him for support - even though he knows that she is also providing it - and he expands in her presence. It's not surprising that he got on better with Thranduil with Lorellin to act as buffer. And she knows to offer him Legolas, too. Her littlest adores his big brother and has total faith in him - and Eilian does need that.
Sad, though, that that little good boy already knows the song of mourning. Inevitable, but still sad. I love Legolas's literal understanding of what is explained to him. And his desire for his mother's stories. And his plans for Eilian. (Which might be more fun than Ithilden's plans!)
Lorellin is just such a big part of their lives. It's a wonder they managed to cobble themselves together again after she died - and no surprise that there were scars.
Author's reply
I couldn't bear to think about Fithral's death from Fithral's POV. It was bad enough from Eilian's. Actually, I feel the same way about Lorellin's.
Eilian is still young enough to need the support of his family, and I think he draws it even from Thranduil here. His mother's death deprived him of her support and also his father's in a way, because they couldn't really reach out to one another as well afterwards.
Death is pretty baffling to human children. I can't even imagine what it would be like for an elf child trying to make sense of it. Of course, they have that certain knowledge of re-embodiment in Valinor, but still.
Thanks for the review, Bodkin.
meckinock
· 17 March 2007
· Chapter 2: Funeral
Eilian's insights into his family were entertaining. I especially liked him not envying Ithilden's ramrod-straight back.
The scene where Fithral is pulled below is truly horrific. I think there must be nothing worse for a warrior (or anyone) than to see a friend taken by the enemy and be helpless to stop what's happening to him. I imagine that scene will haunt Eilian for a long time.
It was nice seeing Thranduil more relaxed with Eilian than we typically see him, even though Eilian was not really on his best behavior.
And yes, I am where I told you I would be :-)
Author's reply
I was sort of trying to map out Eilian's view of everyone in his family in that scene. He has a lot of respect for his father and brother, even though he doesn't necessarily get along with them all the time and sure wouldn't want to be them.
Fithral's death was about as nasty as I could stand to make it. Just for some variety's sake, I was trying to figure out where the orcs could hide other than a cave, and I thought about Vietnam and the fact that the Viet Cong traveled through tunnels. And then I got these really grim pictures of what could happen. I actually toned that down.
I thought Thranduil and Eilian probably did a little better together before Lorellin died. She prodded both of them into better understanding.
And yes, I am where I told you I would be :-)
Sucks to be you.
Jay of Lasgalen
· 17 March 2007
· Chapter 2: Funeral
:(
Poor Eilian. And poor Fithral, too. What a horrible way to die, and how awful for the others to see him slaughtered before their eyes and be quite helpless. They must all know very well that it could just as easily have been one of them.
Despite his strenuous denial - or more likely, because of it - it's clear Eilian is suffering from Shadow, but it's hardly surprising. You did a wonderful job of conveying the pervasive evil. My skin crawled just like Eilian's as the darkness clung to them.
I hope someone will make Eilian see sense, and make him stay at home like Gelmir. Time spent playing with Legolas will help him enormously, and bring them even closer.
Author's reply
That death gave me the creeps to write and I actually toned it down a little. And yeah, it could have been any of them. It was just one of those things.
I figure Eilian is touched by Shadow but not able to recognize it well. I also figure he's better at dealing with it than most people are because of his naturally optimistic temperament. He may need less healing time than Gelmir does. And time with Legolas will definitely help him. The kid amuses me no end.
Agape4Gondor
· 17 March 2007
· Chapter 2: Funeral
Beautiful line - "You may lean on me any time, Naneth, though to me, it still feels the other way around."
And this one - humour in the midst of sorrow - "I do have some experience of combat, you know..."
"Eilian would be able to lead the search without his keeper's glare prodding his spine at every step he took."
I love how you write each of Thranduil's sons so very differently and yet I can feel that they are brothers. Very nice job.
One question - I thought Elves kind of 'dissipated' into the air when they died? Read it somewhere - but can't remember so I was surprised by the burning of his hroar.
Again - great chapter - suspenseful, fun, and serious at all the same time. Family dynamics, as always, are awesome.
Author's reply
I'm working on trying to develop a different narrative voice for each POV character. It's an interesting challenge.
As for elves dissipating, I think Tolkien tells us that Feanor did that so fast they found no body, and the fact that he comments on it suggests to me that most of them dissipated more slowly. As I recall, Glorfindel was buried after his death from Balrog burn. But like you, I think of their bodies as sort of drying out and dwindling.
In this case too, the only thing there was bones. I fear the orcs dined on Fithral.
elliska
· 16 March 2007
· Chapter 2: Funeral
Little Legolas's "I was good" was so cute and I needed it. I agreed with Eilian how sad it was that Legolas knew the song, even when he didn't understand why Fithral was there. Poor little thing. He will understand this concept all too well much sooner than he should.
Ok, the way Fithral died was just awful. I don't see how you could have made that nastier/scarier. But as usual, I loved Eilian's connection with the forest and I thought you showed that really well.
And Eilian and Thranduil are having a very rare moment here--you can really see Lorellin's influence. I almost feel sorrier for him than I do Legolas, seeing how important nana was.
Great chapter. Powerful.
Author's reply
The part about Fithral's death was the reason I decided to rate this PG13. It was about as grim as I could stand to make it. And it's sad that in this case, Eilian's connection with the forest causes him suffering because of the spread of the Shadow.
I had to really think about how Thranduil and Eilian would get along here, and I remembered once writing from Thranduil's pov that things between them grew troubled when Eilian was an adolescent and again when his mother died. So I decided that things were a little better at the time of this story. Nana helped. She helped Thranduil to help Eilian, and she served as someone Eilian wanted to please and drew comfort from.
Thanks for the review, Elliska.
ziggy
· 16 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
I love the way you do this with perspective and in this, it is the serious events viewed Legolas' child's innocence- he doesnt know what the horse carries but picks up on tiny details - Ithildne looking down at the ground etc- viewing events through other characters' eyes- like you did with your last story with the woman meeting Ithilden and co. ooh- his voice can sound like fur yummy.Sorry- all overcome for a minute!
And Eilian almost never argues doing warrior things! Almost.I think your protrayla of Thranduil is one of the best- it is symapthetic but doesnt let him off the hook, critical and challenging but also understanding. Like Lorellin herself. Hope this has a nice ending... but then, all this has that tinge of sadness becasue every time one of them says how much he needs her, you know she will not be there for much longer. Gives all this such a sense of depth and gentl humour has that slight edge of sadness.
Author's reply
Thanks, Ziggy. I always think of little kids as being sort of like dogs, not quite understanding, but sensitive to mood and picking up little clues the grownup doesn't even know he's sending.
I'm actually struggling a little trying to figure out how Thranduil and Lorellin would be as joint parents in this time of growing shadow, but when tragedy has not yet struck. And I want them both to be basically strong and good, but flawed. It's fun. :-)
PS. Ithilden is flattered. Flustered, but flattered.
lwarren
· 16 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Daw! I read this story, loving every minute of it and hating for it to end, until I came to the last and saw the best three letters in the alphabet...TBC! I would have left a one word review like that other person - YAY! - but I'm too gabby for that!
I liked meeting Lorellin and seeing the interaction between her and her family, especially Eilian. It is very evident how she acted as a buffer between him and Thranduil. Also, seeing things through the eyes of little Legolas was a treat - such a visual, tactile age! (He's so sweet - I hate what's coming...for all of them!) I particularly liked the pictures of the Queen with each son and how each pose reflected the personality of the child.
The whole chapter is bittersweet because you make it so very clear how the family is centered around Lorellin. Thranduil's poetry spouting made me want to cry - he will lose that lighter side of himself, won't he? The decision to take Legolas to the funeral of the fallen warrior is chilling - now I realize how he knew what would happen and it explains his reaction (from an earlier story) to his mother's funeral (I don't think he's allowed to attend hers, is he?). It is so very sad to know what is coming. Wonderful chapter, daw, and thanks for letting us get to know Lorellin. I can't wait to see more!
Linda (I love spring break, too, and it's almost over *sobs*)
Author's reply
I hear you about spring break. I can't believe it's Friday already.
I haven't written a multi-chapter story in a while, but this one needs a little space. Not much, mind you. Maybe six to eight chapters, although Nilmandra always says I underestimate.
Writing from a little kid's pov is interesting, especially since I want readers to understand things he doesn't, but what I hope really comes through is how Nana is the center of his world. Of course, he's about to branch out and make some friends too. :-)
Thranduil does lose that poetic side of himself when Lorellin dies. Poor guy. I like to think he got in back in Valinor one day.
I'll probably post chapter 2 within a day or two, depending on what my beta says, but then I have to go to a conference in NYC next week, so I'm not sure how speedy I'll be on this.
Thanks for your review, Linda.
ponypetter
· 15 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Well, this is different. I think we've seen snippets of Lorellin before, but we never got such a glimpse at how different everyone's life was when she was still with them. I thought at first Thranduil seemed overly warm compared to how you normally portray him (we don't normally see him so affectionate!), but I realized later how well it works. We still see his personality, in his expectations of both Eilian and Legolas, but we can see how the pressures of duty and doing right by his sons is softened by the partnership he has with his wife. I think it actually makes his personality in "later" stories even more realistic.
Author's reply
I do think this family's life was different with Lorellin around, and would have continued to be different if she lived. I think Thranduil would have been less burdened, despite the terrible times, because he had someone to share the burden with. And that poetic, soft side of him vanished when she died. Although I do think he's a gentler parent with Legolas than he was with the other two because with them, he could leave the nurturing with Lorellin and attend to developing their characters.
Thanks for the review, Ponypetter.
elliska
· 15 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Ooo what a Spring Break treat. I totally did not expect to see this when I came back to SoA for more reading! And with Lorellin and not in flashbacks! Excellent!
Legolas is so sweet in this. So very young that he doesn't understand. That is actually very nice to see. And I thought it was a very effective POV for the sad goings on there. I also enjoyed seeing him see his future best friend. That was a neat touch.
But I loved this: "As I have already said, I trust your expertise," Thranduil said. "Do what you think best, but do it quickly please."
And Lorellin to the rescue. Perfect! I loved this interaction.
This is a great beginning. Looking forward to more.
Author's reply
Glad you liked it, Elliska. I haven't written a little kid POV for a while and I had to get into it again. But I've made so much of how Legolas's mother's death affected him, that I wanted to show how his world revolves around her. It's also fun to try to communicate things to the reader that Legolas doesn't understand.
And for Thranduil too, it's like the world just got better because she arrived.
So I'm having a good time. :-)
Bodkin
· 15 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
This is just wonderful. I love the Legolas who is still so young that he is only beginning to look outside his family - to whom his parents and brothers are all he needs - all of them revolving round the lynch pin of a small child's world: his mother. And of course Ada's rules don't apply to Nana - she's a great shining star in all their worlds. Legolas is so beautifully written - his point of view is so straightforward and focuses on all the really important things in his life - Nana, nature, boys, Nana, brothers, food, horses, Nana, a pony ... I love his response to the angry river and the spring trees. His very sensory response to the tones of Ithilden's voice is great. His admiration for both his brothers - and his instinctive recognition that Eilian finds it easier to separate elf from warrior than Ithilden, who is always on duty. And that Eilian doesn't usually argue when a warrior - only Eilian! (I hope he is just distressed at Fithral's death rather than feeling responsible for it.) Legolas has such total trust in and admiration for Eilian - and I can only see this brother having a talking horse. Ithilden wouldn't indulge in fairy tales for his little brother's amusement - not unless the child knew they were simply stories.
If Legolas doesn't yet know the way to Annael's house, I'm hoping he has a while yet before he loses his nana, because I've always thought they were friends before her death. - And, he doesn't yet even recognise Turgon ... well, Thranduil doesn't know his good fortune. But he'll learn.
I love seeing this world through Legolas's eyes - before the sun goes in.
And then - Lorellin! How wonderful to see through her eyes. Of course Thranduil is impetuous and poetic - he recognised her as soon as he saw her and began his campaign to win her heart. (I hope Lorellin's parents were there in Valinor when she left Namo's Halls - just as she was there when Thranduil gave in to the inevitable and sailed.) And, for all she has to control her good wood elf impulses to behave like his queen, I'm sure she is able to get almost anything she wants from her husband! While her advice to listen rather than talk - it's a shame that didn't stick rather more firmly in Thranduil's head. I think Eilian needed some pretty intense listening over his more difficult years. And she's still trying to get Ithilden to lighten up. If he didn't adore her so, he would find it truly exasperating to be on the receiving end of her mission to find him a bride!
I love the pictures - and they do show her sons' characters so precisely.
And I suppose it is a good thing that little Legolas, in his role as his father's son, should begin to build walls between himself and the hard outside world. We wouldn't want his mother's funeral to be his first.
This just catches him at that perfect point where the innocent, family-centredness of babyhood begins to look outwards and it's beautiful to see. But transitory. And we know where it's going to end up.
Author's reply
Thanks, Bodkin. I love POV as a tool to explore character and the way the look of the world changes. And I have so few chances to write about Lorellin, that I'm trying to include how she looks to her family and then how she and they look from inside her head too. If she had lived, this family's future would have been different. I can see both Eilian and Ithilden bonded sooner, not because she pushed them, but because she counselled them and smoothed their ways.
This story will NOT go all the way to Lorellin's death. It's there in the future, and if readers have read my other stories, they'll see it on the horizon and read these events in its light, but I haven't the heart to write about it. Still, it's interesting to see how knowing characters' future affects our reading of their present. I think that's one of the reasons I like writing about these pre-Quest years.
I hope to write some about Turgon. He's always a hoot. My big problem with him is my inability to just cut loose and let him have his head while not making the adults all into sitcom characters.
Dot
· 14 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
“She is dead, Eilian. Nana is dead. And Ada burned her. He would not let me see her, and then he burned her. How can she come back if she is all burned up?”
Gosh, I always read that differently than you meant it until you explained it just now! No wonder the child was traumatised!
Author's reply
Wouldn't that be terrible? I can't bear to think of it.
Dot
· 14 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
I love Spring Break!!
I was just thrilled to see a new story from you. And good lord, it’s Lorellin! I know you’ve written Legolas as a child lots of times but I’m so impressed by how you’ve captured his voice at this age. You really let us see the world through a child’s eyes. We see what he’s seeing but at the same time we can make sense of things that he can’t.
I love the descriptions of the river. They’re wonderful. And Lorellin seems to have the same easy charm that Eilian does. The guards certainly seem fond of her :-) I thought it was a nice touch that she seems to know little details like Tolas having a problem with his roof.
Legolas’ world really does revolve just around his family, doesn’t it? Clearly his mother makes everything right in his world but even the thought of seeing his brothers seems to entice him more than the sight of other elflings. And he did not know the other boy at all. LOL!! Is that Turgon? Legolas’ family will be so pleased when he befriends him.
Sometimes Ithilden's voice sounded the way fur felt, but not now. Now it stung like nettles. Ooh, excellent description! I love how he differentiates between what makes him feel good and bad. And that first part made me melt a little…
"Your adar is lucky to have you managing things so competently, but you must save time for me too. I miss you when you are off seeing to your patrols." Tsk. There’s a line between sweet-talking and guilt-tripping, Lorellin. I think Ithilden could have a point, though, about the way she’d manage the troops. Every male in Mirkwood would want to be a warrior! Poor Legolas, of course, takes the whole thing literally. I’m cheerfully ignoring the foreboding music in the background at the idea that neither Legolas nor Thranduil want Lorellin to go away :-)
I just loved the little moment between Lorellin and Eilian that Legolas didn’t quite understand. I was beginning to wonder who the missing rider was. He looked sad, so Legolas took his hand. But Legolas will still offer comfort where he thinks it’s needed. That was a real aww moment. I particularly like the way you show the slight increase in tension in this scene, with Eilian and Ithilden’s reactions and the way no-one seems to notice Legolas when he’s used to their attention. But you made me smile when Legolas thinks about Eilian in his roles as brother and warrior. Though those lines will become a bit more blurred in future, I think… And I notice he doesn’t see quite so easy a distinction in Ithilden! LOL at Legolas frowning at Maltanaur! Those two are just not going to be pals.
Rogue never talked to Legolas the way he did to Eilian, but he listened, and Legolas hoped someday he might decide to talk while Legolas was there. ROTFL!! Has Eilian been spinning tales for his baby brother?!
I’m rolling my eyes at Lorellin and her matchmaking. She’d drive me scatty if she was my mother. But I’ll forgive her because I rather suspect she was rambling on to stop Eilian thinking too much and she did make him laugh… ;-)
I really enjoyed the second part of the chapter. Lorellin’s POV brings something so new to the story. And wow, what a glimpse of Thranduil we get! The Thranduil I know would have put Sathien in his place with just a look long before he followed him. I don’t recall Sathien – does he appear again or can I assume he failed in his Elf Path duties at some stage and got eaten by a spider? And oh my gosh, Thranduil spouts poetic nonsense! I love that side of him!! That’s one of the saddest things to me, that this part of him disappears. Hmmm, I bet that’s where Ithilden gets his inclination to write romantic songs.
Very interesting discussion about Legolas attending the funeral. Thranduil’s right, I think, but it’s sad to see such a duty expected of a young child. And really, I doubt anyone would expect them to bring Legolas. But then, I suppose you’re never too young to learn what it means to be the king’s son :-/ It’s doubly interesting because Thranduil doesn’t let Legolas go to his mother’s funeral. But then, he’d hardly have stood respectfully silent at that. I’m half dreading the idea of Thranduil and Eilian having a talk, even though Lorellin is around to try and make Thranduil understand their son. It’s just that if Eilian is touched by shadow as well as grief, who knows what’ll happen. Well, you do ;-) A warrior has to channel his grief and anger into action against the enemy, rather than let it eat his heart. I think he’s right there, though. And even though I’m avoiding thinking about what happens to Lorellin, I thought that was nicely in-character line considering what we know he does as soon as her funeral is over. It was good too to see a real discussion about their sons rather than Thranduil angry or Ithilden tiptoeing around trying to talk about Eilian or Legolas.
I really loved following Lorellin’s thoughts – from Thranduil to worry about what they suspected, to her baby being plunged into duty, to her own role and back to Thranduil again. Her own father had ridden away with Oropher when she was too young to remember him, and her mother had never learned to live happily without him. She had waited only to see Lorellin settled in the Stronghold before she sailed West, hoping to find her love waiting for her. LOL! I know I shouldn’t laugh at that but I did because so many people have been wanting to know for so long about Legolas’ grandparents and you’ve just calmly slipped in the fact that they’re long gone! Granted I’d suspected it since it’s cousins and aunts who seem to be around but still, it made me laugh.
When you came down to it, the difference was that Thranduil had been raised to send his sons into danger as his father had sent him, while her every instinct was to protect them from any harm that might threaten a hair on one of their heads. Oh, now that’s wonderfully well expressed. And they both suffer, I think. But I’m glad she realises that Thranduil worries about them even as he does send them into danger. I’d have hated her if she didn’t… Thranduil, of course, will find it a lot harder to let their last child go.
You have to smile at Legolas’ childish delight. He’s a good tonic for Eilian because he loves unquestioningly. Lorellin might treasure and understand her middle son but Legolas just adores him.
TBC Hurrah!
Author's reply
I love Spring Break too. It's major problem is that it isn't long enough. However, it's warm enough that most of the snow is gone from my yard so it really does feel like spring.
One of the things I was excited about with this story was the chance to write from Lorellin's pov and thus get to know her a little better. I decided she thinks in terms of her family a lot, and also, of course, she's a wood elf--less wise and more dangerous, as Tolkien says. So I knew it would be different seeing through her eyes, but I was surprised by how different Thranduil when she saw him. I didn't even really think about it until reviewers commented and then I could see they were right.
And Legolas, of course, is still so small that she's the center of his world. At first I had him not going to the funeral, but Nilmandra pointed out I was talking about the duties of the king's son and this would probably be one of them. Poor baby. Did I really not have him at his mother's funeral? I'd have to go look. I thought Thranduil kept him from seeing the body but took him to the funeral where it would be wrapped.
The unknown child is indeed Turgon, and now I have to think about how to introduce him well and show why he fascinates Legolas.
So a matchmaking Nana is not your idea of a good time? Come on! Ithilden needs help. He's not Mr. Smooth, you know. If Lorellin had lived, he and Alfirin would have been married before Alfirin got up the courage to call him by name. :-)
Kate
· 14 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
I'm speechless! Not only did you start another story, it’s “In Progress” and, best of all Nana! (I’m doing a ridiculous looking dance right now…)
I absolutely loved this chapter. I’ve always been interested in Lorellin and how they all interacted with her. Some of my favorite lines were:
“He thought maybe Ada's rules did not apply to Nana because, after all, she was Nana.”
LOL! I’m imagining Ada telling Nana she couldn’t talk to the guards…
“And he did not know the other boy at all.”
Turgon has yet to be unleashed on the royal family?! This should be interesting.
The bit about if Nana became the Troop Commander was funny and sad. You’ve done an amazing job of showing just how much they all need her.
The interaction between Legolas, Eilian and, Ithilden was as always a joy to read.
“Eilian must still be doing warrior things then. When he was being a warrior, he almost never argued.”
I had to smile at that. I would bet that Thranduil sometimes wishes Eilian was a “warrior” at home.
Aww, Nana matchmaking for Ithilden. Does she suspect at this point that Eilian and Celuwen will bond?
I love the interaction between mother and sons but Thranduil steals the show. The love between these two… It’s so different, seeing this side of Thranduil, I really enjoyed that.
“"If you want to help Eilian, you will listen to him, not talk to him."”
I like how you brough up this line. I’m looking forward to the interaction between Eilian and Thranduil with Lorellin there as a buffer.
“His tense posture eased. "His naneth is the hearth at which I warm myself when the world grows cold. I will not hear a word against her."
She laughed. "When I first came to know you, I think it was your capacity for poetic nonsense that surprised me most."” Can I second that?
Wonderful. My intention was simply to read one of your older stories, I had no idea you started a new one. I’m so happy you did! I’ve missed reading about your OCs! The way you’re writing this is fantastic. I liked the commentary by Legolas but I particularly like it from Lorellin’s point of view. You really haven’t done that before, have you? Her insights add a very interesting element. The bit about the drawings was great.
One final comment,
“Her own father had ridden away with Oropher when she was too young to remember him, and her mother had never learned to live happily without him. She had waited only to see Lorellin settled in the Stronghold before she sailed West, hoping to find her love waiting for her. Lorellin prayed it had been so.”
I’ve wondered what happened to her parents, thank you for explaining that.
As always, looking forward to more!
Author's reply
Oh you're the first reviewer to comment on Turgon's initial appearance! Yes, Legolas is about to make a new friend. Not until chapter 3, I think, since Adar and Eilian have to talk first.
Sometimes jumping around in my time line is a pain because I've boxed myself in, but sometimes it's useful. Because readers know what happens to Nana, and that it happens soon, they read all this differently, I think, so it's sad when Legolas says he doesn't want Nana to go away all the time. Poor baby.
When I made notes for this story, I had to sort through my faulty memory and try to remember what the state of affairs was between Eilian and Celuwen. She's gone to live in the settlement with her family and their romance doesn't bloom again until after Nana dies. But Eilian and Celuwen were tentative lovers before she left, and I'll bet Nana knew it and approved. If she'd lived, those two would have been bonded much sooner. Nana would have taken care of Celuwen's father!
It wasn't until I read reviews that I realized how different Thranduil is with Lorellin. No poetic nonsense for the boys!
And no, I haven't used Lorellin's POV before. One of the things I didn't realize when I started writing was what a powerful thing POV is. Being inside her head makes the world look quite different.
Thanks for the review, Kate.
White Wolf
· 14 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
I always smile when I see a story with your name on it. I know it will be a treat involving this wonderful elven family you've created.
I love little Legolas stories, especially when he's this young. I particularly like this one, because it not only includes Lorellin but is from her POV. It's so obvious why her family loves her so deeply and vice versa.
I'm looking forward to more.
Author's reply
People think writing about kids is easy but I find it tricky. It's so tempting to sentimentalize, and it's hard to get the language patterns right. Of course, I guess elflings learned to talk early so they may have mastered things like complex sentences early too.
But I've made so much of how he suffered at his mother's death that I wanted to show how, for him, the world revolves around her. To a lesser extent, it does for the rest of them too.
Glad you liked it.
pipinheart
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Lovely...
Its nice to see a story with Lorellin in it. You can see how everyone adored her, and you see a different Thranduil in it one who very much loves his wife. Of course, as a mother she is worried about her children and would protect them. You can tell she tries to calm the waters between Elian and his father. And little Legolas is adorable here, and his nana wants to protect him from all harm. Loved the comparision of her looking at the pictures done of each of her sons and how different in personality they were.
great read...please update soon...
Author's reply
If Nana had lived, I think this family's future would have been easier. Shadow would still have spread, but home would have been a less tense place sometimes for all of them.
I've been trying to figure Nana out and one thing I decided was that her family was central to her, so she's protective and thinks about them a lot.
Jess
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Fantastic. I think I am not the only one that was thrilled to see that "TBC" at the end of this chapter. Lorellin's POV is proving to be very fascinating so far, she definately provides some intriguing insights into the other characters that we haven't really experienced yet.
By the way, would you happen to know offhand which story of yours contained a flashback to the few days immediately following Lorellin's death? I hope I am not imagining this, but I seem to remember a scene with Eilian returning home after from patrol after hearing of his mother's demise only to find Thranduil and Ithilden have already left to hunt down the orc behind the attack. I think he stopped for a momenent with Legolas also, before taking off after his father and brother. I have been skimming through your other works but can't seen to find the scene I am thinking of.
Author's reply
Thanks, Jess. I haven't written a multi-chapter story in a while. Not that this will be terribly long, but then my stories almost never are.
That scene is well hidden. It's in chapter 4 of "See the Stars," the first story I ever wrote. Not too long ago, I looked at that story and let my finger hover over the delete key for a while before deciding not to do it. I think I've learned some stuff about writing since then!
Gwynhyffar
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Awwwwww, I'm so glad you decided to write this. As sad as coming events may be, it's so nice to see Thranduil et al together and appreciating each other - even with poetic nonsense... or rather, especially with poetic nonsense. I really enjoyed the interaction between Thranduil and Lorellin. They fit each other well and she is a good balance to him - and he to her. I like her glaring at Thranduil. I like her suggesting that he needs to listen and not talk. Maybe he needs to talk with and not at. hmmm. I also liked the reference to the drawings of her with each of the boys when they were small. It's always nice to see links to other stories.
Author's reply
From reading some of the reviews, it's only just occurred to me how different Thranduil looks when he's with her. He's not spouting poetic nonsense at the boys! And they keep their glares to themselves, if they know what's good for them. This part of him disappeared when she died.
I like linking to other stories too. They all feel like one big story to me.
meckinock
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
I can't decide which was my favorite line - Lorellin telling Ithilden to chill out or telling Thranduil he had a gift for spouting poetic nonsense. It's cool that you're writing in her POV.
Author's reply
I love POV. It's a means by which I can surprise myself. I'm still working on Lorellin's though she feels familiar from the way her family remembered her. When I write about the sons, they don't get to see Adar's poetic nonsense side. :-)
vaske
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Yay, another story with your wonderful charcters! My favourite part was seeing Lorellin interacting with her sons. My second favourite part was the story's 'in progress' status...
Author's reply
I'm excited about writing from Lorellin's point of view because I haven't done it before. To me, she and Eilian are alike, and she sometimes finds Ithilden as maddening as Thranduil finds Eilian. I hope you like it.
Manderly
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
What a wonderful surprise to see a new story from you, Daw, though I guess I shouldn't be as I remember you mentioning that you were working on a new storyline a while back. All the same, my heart did a little happy flip when I saw this.
Baby Legolas and his nana, all in the same story. This can't get any better! Other than a few brief glimpses, we've never had this double treat before and I am looking forward to reading every word of this story.
Author's reply
A couple of years back, I was moaning about how I couldn't write from Nana's POV because I needed Legolas in the story (that was back when I wouldn't do an all OC story--good times), and JastaElf suggested I write about this time frame. It seemed so obvious when she said it! Anyway, I put it on my list of possible stories and here it is. It's fun trying to figure out how Nana would think and react to Thranduil, her children, the situation of the Realm. I hope you enjoy it.
Agape4Gondor
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Great start as always, Daw.... I particularly liked the two sides of being the King's wife...
Author's reply
Thanks, Agape. I think the House of Oropher ruled by serving the Woodland Realm and were probably about as far from modern royalty as you can get. That's my theory, anyway, and I'm sticking to it. :-)
Lianna
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
I read this about an hour ago, and I found myself thinking, "Yes, that sounds like Lorellin." I couldn't understand why I felt that way, though, since you've only written about her from a distance.
Then I realized what happened. You didn't write about her, but Bodkin did, in her Valinor story using your characters. Lorellin's voice and perspective here seem very consistent with the Lorellin we met in Valinor.
It's nice to be able to pay another visit to your Mirkwood. I didn't know whether you would be writing multichapter stories about this world anymore.
Author's reply
I actually had to go look to be sure, but Bodkin didn't write from Lorellin's POV either. So far as I know, she's untouched territory. :-)
However, I have to say I'm pleased you sort of recognized her from the glimpses we've had of her in her family's memories. I'm feeling my way along with her, because she's a new POV for me.
I wasn't sure I'd be writing multichapter fanfic stories anymore either, but I have time right now, and I really do enjoy it. It's such a terrific chance to experiment and see how readers react to various things.
Jay of Lasgalen
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
It's great to see another story of the Thranduilionath! There are some lovely glimpses into Eilian's character here: 'When he was being a warrior, he almost never argued.' I like the 'almost'!! And: "If you want to help Eilian, you will listen to him, not talk to him." Lorellin had a profound insight into her middle son, but I don't think Thranduil ever quite saw him the same way.
I like this line as well: 'Rogue never talked to Legolas the way he did to Eilian, but he listened, and Legolas hoped someday he might decide to talk while Legolas was there.'That says a lot about Legolas, and Eilian, and the relationship between them.
A great story, and I can't wait to see more!
Author's reply
I do think Lorellin understood Eilian in a way Thranduil never did, but then she had trouble understanding Ithilden, love him though she did.
Legolas trusts Eilian absolutely. If Eilian says Rogue talked, he did!
Thanks, Jay.
French Pony
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Hmmm. Is this the first time we've been inside Lorellin's head? What a great opportunity to learn about what makes this legendary woman tick. Ithilden is probably right that Lorellin would have made an excellent troop commander. She has charisma by the bucketful, and she seems to be more of a natural leader than her husband is. Thranduil leads by shining example and intimidation, but Lorellin's skills are more subtle than that. She doesn't tell people what to do, she makes them want to do it to please her. She could have been a major power in the Woodland Realm if she had lived.
Author's reply
I think it is the first time I've written from her POV. I might have forgotten something, but I believe I've mostly written flashbacks that use her family's memories of her, so they can't go inside her head. What a great discipline and useful tool POV is.
obsidianj
· 13 March 2007
· Chapter 1: Homecoming
Oh, another longer story in your special Woodland realm. Finally, I get to know Lorellin. I have heard much about her in later stories, but here she shows up herself. You describe little!Legolas so well, him racing ahead and skipping along the adults seeing everything without quite understanding what is going on. And Eilian and Ithilden make an appearance, too. All I need from a story from you.
Author's reply
Thanks, Obsidianj. It's interesting to try to write from a kid's POV, not sentimentalize him, show how things would look to him, and yet convey stuff he doesn't understand to the reader.