In Deep Water by Grey Wonderer
Pearl Took · 18 October 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
Wow! A totally engrossing story! I thought it was excellent that you had it be Merimas who rescued Pip and that it then worked out well because he was also not one of the strong lads, so Pippin could relate to him. And I loved the ending - Pippin did get to be a rescuer, and his sisters could finally be glad of his ability to swim. Most Excellently Well Done, GW!
Author's reply
Thank you for reading and I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Pearl Took · 18 October 2008 · Chapter 0: Once upon a time...
I loved the story of your coming here and ending up being one of our best Hobbit authors. Pippinfan is a dear, as are you, and I'm glad that you two have each other as good, close friends. May your friendship never dim! Hugs to you both! Pearl
Author's reply
I am hardly one of the best Hobbit authors. I just have fun with it but thank you all the same.
Andrea · 30 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
Well, I would have loved to quote all my favourite parts in this story, but then it would have been the whole story. And since the story is already presented in italics and therefore "quoted" (in a way), I'll just leave it like it is ;-) The first part was very suspenseful and I liked it that Merimas was Pippin's rescuer, not Merry or Frodo. That's something new! I very much enjoyed how Esmie won the argument with her nephew. Pippin gulped. Never argue with a Took lass when she is angry. Very true :) I also loved how Merry played along with Pippin's illness. Tricksy Brandybuck! But in the end poor Pippin was frightened even more. Merimas' approach was more successful, because he showed Pippin that he was not alone in doing something for the very first time and that it was never wrong to be prepared. And that last part proved that he was right! I don't think Vinca is too old to learn how to swim, but I think Ivy should learn it as soon as possible. She's just like her uncle! Thank you very much G.W.!
Author's reply
LOL Those italics would NOT do what I wanted them to do. I only wanted them for the first paragraph but they insisted on being used for the entire story or none of the story. I am not a format expert it would seem. I didn't realize that Merimas was to be such a huge part of this one until it sort of came to me during the writing of this one. I had planned for Frodo to be the one to save Pippin. Now that it's turned out like it did, I'm glad it was Merimas. I'm glad you enjoyed that too. Merry did get carried away with his group of healers didn't he? LOL I am quite certain that Ivy will get her swimming lessons if Pippin has any say in it and Pervinca just might want lessons after this experience. Thank you for reading as always!
Primula_Baggins at LJ · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
Thanks for this delightful and touching story. I loved how clever little Pippin was in arguing with his cousins about why he "couldn't" swim! And I was touched by how he saved Ivy when he was grown. Prim
Author's reply
Thank you so much for reading. I'm glad you enjoyed Pippin's logic as well as his rescue. Thanks so much for the lovely review.
PIppinfan1988 · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
Don't feel bad, GW -- I'm proof that even the Beta needs a beta. And I rather like the Italics! I have to tell you, the first time I read through this exquisite story (in two sessions, lol), I couldn't have quit the first half even if my flat was on fire! The suspense was gripping, intense. I felt like Merimas by the time I could peel my eyes away from it, lol. I realized towards the end of that scene that I'd been holding my breath! Speaking of Merimas, as you know, I've peppered my own tales with my version of his character, but I really love how you've portrayed him in this story (and others, too!). I absolutely adore your Merry -- but this was a nice change in that the "hero" was someone other than him. I know Merry is always ready to protect that which is dearest to him, but it is sweet to know our beloved Pippin has other friends who care about him, too. And then the middle part where Pippin does his utmost to manipulate his Auntie and Uncle to do his will was pure delight. Pippin concentrating on making himself look ill was hilarious -- and he is so innocent in believing he truly could do it. I'll say it many times over: I LOVE your Pippin and Merry. And for the last part -- the part that brings it all to full-circle. Now *Pippin* is the Rescuer, saving his own niece from drowning and advocating swim lessons for his sisters. More gripping suspense! But it was all so GOOD! I fell in love with your world of hobbits from the very first story I read of yours -- "Thinking of You", and it grew from there. Don't balk! I love each and every one of those tales! You have a special talent for suspense and making readers laugh, my friend. And that is a gift, just like your friendship. :-)
Author's reply
Hey, the Italics turned out to be impossible to get rid of so I am very glad you liked them. LOL I am so glad you enjoyed this but next time, breath while reading and whatever you do, don't ignore fire! That could be worse than drowning. This is the first time the Merimas has really had much to say to me. I was surprised when he became so talkative. I've always enjoyed your version of him but I never suspected that he would turn up in one of my stories other then in a very minor way. I could see Pippin believing that he had made himself look sick enough to frighten Merry. I like to think that Pippin has quite an imagination. Most of the time I don't do gripping suspense so I was glad it turned out. Sometimes when I go away from humor it just doesn't work at all. I'm glad to know that this was suspense-ful. (Beta that, will you?) As always, you are entirely too good to me. Thank you for your friendship and the beta and for just being you! Happy Birthday!
Garnet Took · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
This was fantastic, GW. Poor Pippin sinking beneath the water was frightening, and Merimas coming to the rescue, wow! The whole exchange at Pippin's first swimming lesson was priceless.:) I somehow suspected that Pippin might get the chance to put the lessons to good use. It was very sweet that it was his neice that he saved. She'll be hero-worshipping him for a long time.
Author's reply
Thank you so much for reading. I know how busy you are with work now. I'm very glad that you enjoyed it. I started to write the actual swimming lesson but I decided that the build up to it was more my style and most folks know what a swimming lesson is like. My hobbits just have to talk and it's hard to talk while learning to swim. : ) There was actually a bit more of this after the rescue but it just didn't work with this part and it was running on too long. As my beta pointed out, it was really a second story and maybe, at some point, it will be.
Andrea · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 0: Once upon a time...
Grand prologue, G.W.! My thanks to you both for your wonderful story additions to this precious little kingdom! Shouldn't it be "and they WROTE happily ever after" ;-) And now to the story...
Author's reply
Thank you for reading my prologue! And perhaps it should really be "and they wrote happily every after" but they also 'read happily ever after' and some of the really nice ones, like you, 'review happily ever after.' : )
Lindelea · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 0: Once upon a time...
Another GW prologue arrives in my mailbox, and of course I must drop everything to write a review. I'm not reading fanfic at the moment, but I'm storing it up on my "want to read" list for when life slows down, if only a little. What a treat to read this, even in a stolen moment. Honestly, your prologues are just as fun to read as any other chapter...
Author's reply
Real Life kept me away from writing and reading for a while there so I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes we have other, more important things to see to. Thank you for stopping by to read the prologue. It's lovely to hear that you enjoyed it as much as you might a chapter. I keep telling people that I might just quit writing the story portion altogether and become a prologue writer. I wonder if there is such a thing as a 'stand-alone' prologue?
shirebound · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
Where ever Merry was taking him would be fine. He was safe now. Awwww, I love little moments like that. This is such a wonderful story, full of wisdom and love. Pippin nodded and then began trying to unbutton his shirt. “What I really want to learn is how buttons work,” Pippin said absently. Buttons were stubborn and were probably invented by a Brandybuck. They didn’t work properly at all unless you struggled with them and worked hard at lining them up. Awwww. :)
Author's reply
Even though Merry didn't do the actual rescue, I couldn't resist letting him carry Pippin back to the Hall. Glad you approve. Pippin's button issue, which I have mentioned before in one or two other stories, comes from real life experience. I'm not willing to say, whose real life experience, but it is actually based on something that I, er, that someone I know experienced. hehehe
Celeritas · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
This story was loads of fun to read, from the tense rescue to Merry's evil streak and amazing deadpan (while Frodo and Berilac, as well as most of your readers, lose it!). Plus a hundred bonus points for not mentioning eyecolor! (Describing book characters according to movieverse always throws me for a loop when I read, which means that fics that don't do that are always more pleasurable for me. Just a personal thing.)
Author's reply
I was hoping for a bit of laughter with Merry's evil streak. I'd let things get a bit tense there during the first bit and so I did want a few laughs along the way. I'm very glad you enjoyed it. (I know Frodo and Berilac did.) Really? Bonus points? I didn't know I could get bonus points! It's funny what will throw a person out of a story but I do think that everyone has something like that. I'm glad you enjoyed this one and I thank you for my bonus points. I don't think I've ever received a bonus before! Thank you for the lovely review too!
Dreamflower · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
This is excellent, GW! One of your best ever! I loved the beginning, when Pippin just assumed that because he had watched Merry and the others, that he knew how to swim. So very Pippin. Your description of him going under, and Merimas' struggles to reach him in time actually had me worried that the story was AU. I kept thinking "No, GW wouldn't ever do that, would she?" But you really racked up the suspense. And Saradoc and Esme being so stern with him, Merry's handling of Pippin's "sick ploy"--now that was truly funny. I was giggling along with Frodo and Berry when Merry got to the "two healers" part, LOL! But Merimas' conversation was what turned the trick, and now you are going to have to write more about that hobbit, because you have really turned him into a great character! When Frodo thought about his parents, and Merry picked up on it... And then the ending, when Pippin saves his little niece--yes, indeed he found himself in exactly the same position that Merimas had talked about, but because he could swim, he was able to help! I'll bet he *does* teach Pervinca to swim; and I also bet he writes a 'thank you' note to Merimas. Wonderful wonderful story, dear!!
Author's reply
I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I could see Pippin deciding that he knew all there was to know about swimming just from watching. Glad you agree. No, I could never drowned Pippin. I can do AU, but I have to have my happy ending. I just had to let Merry go a bit too far with his 'healers'. He was enjoying it too much and it was breaking Frodo and Berilac up completely so it would be like Merry to continue. That is the first time that Merimas has decided to say anything important to me and so I am hoping he will turn up with more information at some point. I'm glad you liked him. I didn't want to have Frodo dwell on things but I did think it would be only natural and I just knew that Merry would pick up on it. I may just have to write a thank you note to Merimas. He was a very big help in this story. Thank you for reading and for your friendship!
Dreamflower · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 0: Once upon a time...
And the kingdom is much the richer for the presence of said stranger, who has proved her worth through many delightful tales!!
Author's reply
Awww, thank you, dear friend.
Mum's the Word · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
This was just wonderful, GW! The changes in viewpoint were masterfully done, and I loved the courageous heroism of a minor character. Merimas was perfect in reasoning with Pippin, not only because he had saved Pip, but because he knew what it was like to be not quite as strong or fast as the other two cousins. And bringing Merimas's words, and the story, full circle so that Pippin actually did save another hobbit -- and a beloved niece at that -- was just perfect. I almost expected Aunt Esme to confess that she'd learned to swim, but having Merimas do the convincing was even better. And who knows, maybe she has learned and will be the one to teach Pippin's sisters! In any case, hurrah for brave cousins and for brave chickens who grow into great heroes! Well done, kudos, and more brownies!
Author's reply
Why thank you! When I first wrote this one I was a bit worried about all of the different view points that I was putting in. There really isn't a clear POV for the story and I was afraid that it might be too confusing. I'm so glad that you enjoyed that part. I wanted all of them to share their thoughts, especially during the rescue. Merimas turned into a real hero not only in the water, but also as the voice of reason. I wasn't expecting that. I thought Merry or Frodo would rescue Pippin but the further into this I went the more it seemed to be Merimas's story. I almost let Esme confess that she could swim and then I decided that since she had come to Buckland as an adult she might be less likely to have learned to swim. Thank you for reading and for bringing brownies! You know how much I love them!
Mum's the Word · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 0: Once upon a time...
I always love your prologues, but this one is especially wonderful! Stories of Arda is a treasure of a kingdom, and its "empress" is indeed most benevolent and praiseworthy! And I, for one, am ever so glad that you ventured into the realm of writing; your stories are delightful and full of humor. I'm very thankful for Stories of Arda, and for you and your stories! Hugs, brownies, and blessings!
Author's reply
Thank you. The 'empress' here has always been very kind to me and my little fictions. I'm glad you enjoy my little fictions. Having Stories of Arda to visit and both read and post here makes writing all the more enjoyable. And having folks stop by, review and bring brownies and hugs is indeed a huge blessing! Thank you, Mum!
PIppinfan1988 · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 0: Once upon a time...
What a wonderful gift to wake up to! You do have the most creative Prologues! Loved this wee little Kingdom story. :-) So sorry, GW! Apparently, I missed some stuff. :-( But...thanks for the Birthday present. I will savour the thought of reading your magnificent story until after prison/work. :-) It will give me something to look forward to and make the Manic Monday go faster. ;-)
Author's reply
I really do hope you have an excellent birthday and I'm glad you liked the prologue. I meant every word. I think what happened is that I got in a hurry and missed a few of your corrections. I looked back through it and I think the mistakes were mine. I got annoyed because I couldn't get the Italic feature to work and I think I lost track of things. LOL Sorry about that, dear Beta.
Larner · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
Oh, the poor little lass! She has had a time of it! But Pippin has learned his lesson thoroughly, and has taken to heart what Merimas was trying to tell him. I'm so glad Sara insisted Pippin learn to swim in spite of himself. And I loved how Pippin and Merry were both laying it on thick! So perfect! Loved this! To italicize just a bit, post the story here, then highlight only the portion you want in italics and then click on the I button at the top of the text editor box and it will go into italics.
Author's reply
Thanks for reading and I'm glad you enjoyed it. Sadly, I tried that for the italics. I tried putting the text in italics on Word and then doing a copy and paste and I tried highlighting on site and clicking italics. Then, for a final attempt, I tried using the html symbols and that's when it decided to make the entire story italic! Go figure.
Larner · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 0: Once upon a time...
What a wonderful dedication, GW!
Author's reply
She is a very good friend. Glad you enjoyed this part.
harrowcat · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 1: In Deep Water
(Frodo) Harrowcatliz patted (Merimas) GW on the back and said, “That was very impressive, (Merimas)GW.” You know that bit in your prologue about other people helping to improve your writing? Offered very humbly..... that he could extent to Merimas ....(extend) “Your chicken.” ....(you're) He’d nearly drown(ed) only two days ago “Well, what if you were sitting here by the pond like Frodo was the other day when you nearly drown(ed)?” Merimas said. Pippin objected not wanting to think that he could have actually drown(ed).
Author's reply
All corrected. Thanks. I must have messed up some of my dear beta's corrections while transferring the story over. I was trying to fix a problem with the italics which never worked and I may have transferred a few of my original mistakes in doing so. You just gotta love format issues!
harrowcat · 29 September 2008 · Chapter 0: Once upon a time...
I do love your prologues.....now on to the tale! :)
Author's reply
Thank you. I like to play with them a bit so I'm glad you enjoy them.