(From Dreamdeer) I almost missed out on an exquisite reading experience, based on this prologue. Unnecessary passive voice made me fear that the whole story would plod. Yet the content intrigued me enough to give the first chapter a chance, and by then I was so hooked, in fact so utterly enchanted in the oldest sense of the word, that after I wrote a 10+ review for MEFA I decided to go back and read this all over again, giving my views chapter by chapter (as I prefer done with my own work, when I can get it.)
So, let's get this little quibble out of the way. Passive voice means anything with a conjugation of the verb, "to be". The more you can weed it out, the more active and engaging your story becomes. (JK Rowling did make a notable exception, in that all of her house-elves speak in passive voice, to underline their helplessness under the spell laid upon them from birth.)
For an example, I took a segment out of this prologue: "...it seems as though year by year I am watching the dying gasps of the remnants of the Faithful, and it tears at my heart. Time is weighing heavily on me..." Notice that "tears my heart" has the most power in the section. Now, compare the vigor of a very slight rewrite: "it seems as though year by year I watch the dying gasps of the remnants of the Faithful, and it tears at my heart. Time weighs heavily on me..." Can you feel the difference? Subtle, perhaps, but it can accumulate.
Keep in mind that I only nitpick like this for the worthiest of stories, and writers worth the time. You have tremendously impressed me overall.
Already the prologue caught my interest with its hint of backstory, and the knowledge that it begins with Aragorn already weary.
More on the next chapter.
Author's reply
I'm sorry the use of passive voice in the prologue threw you... I don't use it very often (or at least, I hope I don't let too much slip in) but sometimes I do, deliberately. Aragorn here is hurrying along, writing a letter to Lord Elrond, and grammar and the like are not something he's particularly concerned with as much as pouring his heart out... and then retracting it for fear Elrond will worry too much over him. But I appreciate your comments. It's always a good reminder to doublecheck things like that and no matter how many times you revise, things slip through. I hope you didn't find the rest of the story too clogged with passive voice. I don't care for it myself and try to keep it to a minimum.
But mostly I thank you for the kind comments about the story itself. It's been a subject that intrigued me since reading Strider's reactions to the Nazgul in FOTR. Thank you for taking the time to review here *and* at MEFA... wow. A 10 pointer! Thank you so much. :)
Lady Telcontar
· 16 July 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
I am unable to say just how much I enjoyed reading this most excellent story. Throughout all of the story, I felt stuck to the screen by some unnamed power, forcing me to read the next chapter and the next and the next...
This tale will most certainly stay in my memory forever as one of the best Aragorn-centric stories ever and surely the most heartwrenching one.
You have the talent to make your readers feel exactly what Aragorn feels, to make everything seem real, like painting pictures with words. And that is what in my opinion makes this story so touching and realistic.
To think, that after much suffering and at the edge of Hope, at a point where one can fall no lower, one can get up again and become even sronger than before...
For that is what Aragorn did.
Author's reply
Thank you so much, Lady Telcontar! My goodness, what a glowing review you've left me. I'm so glad you enjoyed the story. My chief goal in writing it was exactly as you put it--to show that a man can fall to the very brink of destruction yet still find the strength to climb back up, and afterward, though not without scars, find himself stronger than he was. Tolkien left that compelling glimpse of Aragorn's reaction as he spoke of the Nazgul to the Hobbits in Bree, and like so many writers, I wanted to explore it and find a reason why, so many years later, he would still find himself in a cold sweat simply speaking about them. It would have taken quite a lot to cause a man as strong as Aragorn to feel that sort of long-term lingering fear. I'm very glad you found the tale realistic and touching.
Thanks again for the lovely review!
Stefania
· 2 June 2009
· Chapter 7: For the Dead of Bracken's Ferry
Whew! That was just stunning. Aragorn versus a Nazgul. Because I am reading this some months after its first posting, I could read others' reviews and your comments to find out who rescued Aragorn. I thought it might be Elrond's sons or one of the Istari. Gandalf would be too obvious. That Aragorn was rescued by his own men rather than a more powerful creature is a simple explanation, perhaps, but a better one. I was expecting a deus ex machina coming but instead our boy was rescued by his comrades--a more realistic approach.
I continue to be impressed by your story. It's an excellent example of how to write action.
- Steff
Author's reply
Thank you so much! I'm glad you like how I write action... it's something I enjoy doing very much, so I'm glad it comes across as both realistic (well, as realistic as fantasy can be) and believable. And yes, I do try to avoid the "out of the blue" rescues when I can--the Rangers at this point had no one around to help them, and desperation breeds all kinds of inventions, hence Halbarad's grabbing up the flaming brands like he did. I figure he probably had heard stories of Glorfindel driving off the Witch King in the past and likely that helped him make the almost instinctive decision to grab for the flaming brands. Certainly he didn't have much time to sit and ponder!
I hope you continue enjoying the story. Thanks for the review!
Stefania
· 1 June 2009
· Chapter 6: Unexpected
Hey Cairistiona -
I just wanted to leave a little note to tell you I am loving this story so far. The language you have used to described difficult feelings and angsty moments is spot on. Not only that, the tough situations haven't become maudlin and over the top so far. Good job. I'm off to the next chapter.
- Steff
Author's reply
Thank you, Steff! I'm glad you're enjoying the story and especially appreciate your comment that the tough situations haven't become maudlin. That's something I really do hope to avoid in my stories, so that's encouraging to hear. Hope you enjoy the rest of the story and thanks for the review!
Raksha The Demon
· 2 May 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
A fine ending to this excellent thrill-and-chill ride. Aragorn has regained his hope and initiative, despite continued memory of the Nazgul horrors. It's good that he got to see his mother as well. Aragorn seems to have emerged from his ordeal even stronger than before, if a bit sadder.
Author's reply
Thank you, Raksha! I'm so glad you like how this tale finished up. Yes, Aragorn is sadder but stronger, which seems to be the pattern for his life before the war... that grimness we see in his face from Tolkien's description really does reflect a life filled with hardships. But there's always a wellspring of hope and that did not truly diminish even with the struggles he went through here. I like to think if anything he discovered even greater depths of hope within himself, once Elrond straightened him out. Thank you so much for reading this entire tale and for all your faithful reviews--they mean the world!
Raksha The Demon
· 2 May 2009
· Chapter 25: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 1
A lovely epilogue - Aragorn really needed this time to relax and rest and recover. The thoughts about his big feet were funny; I'm sure he'd have long feet and hands. And poor Glorfindel got to play Chase-A-Wraith, but not Whack-A-Wraith (which would have pleased him more).
Author's reply
Thank you, Raksha! Yes, poor Glorfindel never got his chance to truly win at Whack-A-Wraith but at least he made sure it was gone for the time being. And I'm sure that pleased him well enough for the moment. And I do wonder sometimes just what Aragorn's boot size was! :) Thanks for the review!
Linda Hoyland
· 1 May 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
Thank you for a story that every chapter left me eagerly awaiting more. If this were in the shops, I'd rush out to buy a copy.
I liked the way you had Aragorn decide to find Gollum and in doing so finds purpose again.
I eagerly await your next story.
Thank you for a great read.
Author's reply
Thank you so much, Linda! I'm so glad that you found this tale worthy of ever actually putting down cold hard cash to buy! It was definitely a labor of love and one that while I'm sorry is finished now allows me to explore new stories, not least of which is Aragorn's hunt for Gollum. There are so many, many stories to tell about Aragorn--hopefully I'll be writing for a long time. Thank you again for this and for all the reviews you've left. They're greatly appreciated. :)
Estelcontar
· 28 April 2009
· Chapter 999999: Acknowledgements
I should be the one thanking you for providing me with such delightful hours of reading by being the test reader for your wonderful story.
I'm soooooooooo glad to hear that more stories will be forthcoming. I will love to read more of your Aragorn gap fillers be they about the hunt, about Aragorn's sojourns with his people, in Rivendell, or his exploits in Wild. And I wouldn't mind reading your take on our Elessar's reign either, mind you.
Besides, I want to keep on meeting your Halbarad, Denlad, Galadh and Eledh. *grin*
Author's reply
A mutual thanking society, the two of us, then! LOL Seriously, your assistance was invaluable and I do thank you. :)
I probably have more story ideas than time to write in my lifetime... or at least I hope! I'm so glad, especially, that you want to keep on with the exploits of Denlad, Galadh and Eledh... OC's are always a risk in any fandom and I'm glad my three fellows have received such a warm welcome. And Halbarad, oh yes, we'll see lots more of him and Aragorn. And hmm, Elessar--yes, I may have an idea or two for him as well. ;)
This story has been such fun, I'm sorry to see it end, but there'll be more to come. Thanks again!
Elflingimp
· 28 April 2009
· Chapter 999999: Acknowledgements
I will follow(you bet I will!),how could I not, this is the best story I have read in a long while and thou I don't review every chapter Please know I am reading. Hugs The Imp
Author's reply
Thank you so much for your kind words and all the reviews you left. I'm glad you enjoyed the story!
Elentarri
· 28 April 2009
· Chapter 999999: Acknowledgements
Brilliant! Well done.
Author's reply
Thank you, Elentarri! Glad you enjoyed the story. :)
Linda Hoyland
· 28 April 2009
· Chapter 25: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 1
I love the way you show aragorn's gradual recovery here.His frustration, but also slowly returning hope are very vividly conveyed.I love the way you use the "Trotter" tale!
Author's reply
Thank you, Linda! Glad you liked the epilogue and it's journal style. It seemed the only way to concisely show an entire year's worth of healing, and really show intimately what Aragorn was thinking about the entire ordeal. And yes, Elrond probably had all kinds of fun telling everyone about Trotter--I do find myself wondering what the twins may have done once they were reminded of that. *grin* Thanks for the review!
Silivren Tinu
· 28 April 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
I like this ending even more than what I thought to be the ending. ;-) You are right, in a way FotR could be seen as a sequel to this story, but I still wouldn't mind at all hearing some of Aragorn's adventures while hunting Gollum from you. I also hope that Gandalf will appear in your stories again - I like the way you write my favourite wizard. *g*
It was really nice to see that Aragorn is now able to listen to Halbarad and Elrond (and himself ;-) and spend some time in Rivendell when he needs it.
Aragorn's visit to his mother was heartwarming. I think he could really use the comfort she had to offer him. I loved Aragorn's reunion with his rangers. I can't blame him for feeling insecure and I could have hugged all of them for greeting him the way they did.
I very much enjoyed the conversation between Aragorn and Gandalf. Poor Aragorn - you definitely have to be a very patient man to enjoy a conversation with a Maia. *g* What followed reminded me of the scene where Gandalf tells Frodo about the Ring for the first time (I love that scene). It's always both exciting and frightening to hear about Gandalf's discovery, or, at this stage, theory. The way you ended the story makes me want to read FotR again right away. :D
Once again thank you for sharing this tale with us - I hope there will be many more to come! :)
Almut
Author's reply
Thanks, Almut! I'm so glad you liked the "second" ending. *grin* And wow, it makes you want to read FOTR! That to me is exactly what fanfic should do... inspire people to dig deeper into the original. Gandalf will definitely appear again, and I'll follow Aragorn on his hunt for Gollum as well. And yes, wasn't it sweet of the Rangers to basically throw a big party upon Aragorn's return? (Makes me wonder what they must have done when he finally came back after all his years south as Thorongil).
Still more stories to come--these characters still jostling and elbowing me for attention. *grin* Thank you for all your wonderfully encouraging reviews throughout this big long epic. They're very much appreciated!
Lily Baggins
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
Well, I have to say that this has been one of THE most mesmerizing stories I’ve encountered in my seven years of reading LOTR fanfic. It was absolutely wonderful, every element, and I hope you’ll be writing of Aragorn’s ventures for many years to come.
I must say that the last part was thoroughly Aragorn---home in Rivendell to seek solace and at the behest of Halbarad, and yet the moment Gandalf indicates that Aragorn is urgently needed for a cause, he's outta there the next day! Talk about not letting the grass grow under your feet!
You have no idea how I will miss looking forward to installments of this story. It's been the bright spot of my week for a long time now. I'm so glad you have other ideas for future fics, and I am going to grovel/beg/plead/pray that you're still planning to post some "deleted scenes" to this story. I'm so looking forward to them!
In the meantime, I'll be re-reading this over and over, you can be sure of that. It will definitely always remain one of my all-time favorites. Thank you so much for giving us this story.
Author's reply
Thank you so much, Lily! I'm so glad the story held up for you to the very end, and yes, this story may be finished but I do have more to come, including the "deleted scene" ones, the first of which I'll post next week. I'm putting them up separately under the title "At Hope's Edge: The Appendices" just because they are a bit different in some of the detail than what eventually ended up in At Hope's Edge. But still fun to read, I hope. :) There's 4 one- and two-shots for this. So grovel no more... they'll be coming. *grin* And I have more stories coming besides, although maybe not as big or epic as the scope of this one was.
Yes, Aragorn certainly didn't let much grass grow under his feet--and he really didn't need to hang out in Imladris too long the second time around. Just enough to get some reassurances from his ada and a bit of R&R.
I'm honored you consider this one of the better ones you've ever read and thank you so much for all the lovely reviews you've left!
jgmsccc
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 999999: Acknowledgements
Thank you for a terrifc story. I lvoed every minute of it.
Author's reply
You're very welcome, and my thanks to you for your kind words, jgmsccc! I'm glad you enjoyed the story.
Estelcontar
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
That is indeed a great ending. Aragorn's determination and reckless joy are the right note to strike at the end of such a wonderful story as yours is. Congratulations.
I must confess I wouldn't mind reading in the future your take on the hunt for Gollum. *grin*
Author's reply
Thank you, Estelcontar! I do think that Aragorn likely would have that sort of "battle song" in his veins that you read about in various takes on warriors, and it finally came back to him in the end. And yes, I do intend to do some stories based on his hunt. Not sure they'll be big epics like this one, unless I somehow figure out a way to cover all, what was it, 16 years?, in one go! *That* would be an epic tale, methinks! Thanks for all your help with this and all your lovely reviews... I couldn't have done this without your encouragement, dear!
Minerva Organa
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
*applause* Oh, what a fantastic ending!!! Aragorn has found hope again, the hunt begins, and all is right with the world...or as much as it will ever be in this period of the Third Age.
The bit with Aragorn and Gilraen was so wonderful. And Gandalf was great, always makes me laugh.
This has been such an amazing, amazing story. Your characters are beautiful and your plots are brilliant. I would take my hat off to you, if I had one! =D
Author's reply
Thank you, Minerva! I'm so glad you enjoyed this... and gosh, plots are my weak point so to hear anyone say they're brilliant really puts me at risk of overinflated ego! LOL And you're right... things are as right as they can be at this point in Aragorn's life. There's still so many challenges ahead of him (lots of fodder for fics). I'm glad you liked the bit with Aragorn's mother--I feel sometimes that I forget about her and at that point in time she was still alive and living back with her people. So having him visit her just made sense to me. One of these days I'll address her and his relationship to her in his later years more fully, I think. And yes, Gandalf! He and Aragorn are so fun together... such an interesting pair of characters. I want to explore them more, as well. So... hopefully more stories to come! Thanks for reading this and for all your lovely reviews! :)
Laikwalâssê
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 999999: Acknowledgements
I´ve just dicovered this wonderful story and read it in one rush and I too must express my admiration of such amazing work. Aragorn is so moving described here that I really felt all the despair he had to face. Thank you for so much insight in the hard life of a ranger. The scene between Aragorn and his father was so touching and Aragorn can be glad to have such a family. Thank you so much. Lai
Author's reply
Thank you, Lai! I'm glad you enjoyed this story and were able to read it all in one shot like that. The Rangers did have a very hard life, didn't they? Thank you for the kind words!
Fantasia
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
So, this is the end, I'm sad that it is finished, I have enjoyed this story a lot...Denlad married, I like that guy, in fact, I like all his Rangers' group, so I'm glad that you didn't kill more of them. Well, he is recovered, ready for more battles, hurts and heartbreaking experiences; fortunately he will have a great reward. I haven't review for a while, but RL has been very demanding, but I do appreciate your stories and I hope to read more of them in the future.
Thanks, Fantasia
Author's reply
Thank you, Fantasia! I certainly understand how RL overtakes you. I'm just glad you were still reading and enjoying. Yes, it's a bit sad to see this come to an end, but as you say, Aragorn's all healed up and ready for whatever else comes his way. Thank you for reading and for all your lovely reviews!
Larner
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 999999: Acknowledgements
My first true love, Aragorn son of Arathorn; it is ever a joy to read his adventures!
Thank you so!
Author's reply
I'm so glad you enjoyed this particular adventure (although I think Aragorn would call it "torture"! LOL). Thanks for reading and leaving so many wonderful reviews. :)
Larner
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
And the hunt begins! Wonderful, and oh, so likely!
Author's reply
Thanks, Larner... yes, the timing ended up being perfect to end on the "let's go hunting" theme. Wasn't planned that way but hey, it worked. LOL Thanks for the review!
Calenlass
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 999999: Acknowledgements
I'm sad to see this end.
It's been great, reading this twice a week. You've reminded me of all the reason why I love Aragorn's character and personality. You've also made me like Halbarad more. :)
Thanks for writing!
~Cal
Author's reply
Thanks, Cal... you know, I'm kind of sad to see it end, too. I'm so glad, though, that you enjoyed the story and also that you ended up liking Halbarad more! That was part of my mission. *grin* And thank you for all the faithful reviews you've left.
Inzilbeth
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 999999: Acknowledgements
You are most welcome, it was an absolute pleasure to beta your fabulous story for you. And as for canon, as I've said to you before, you'll soon catch me up on that but I won't ever write the way you do! Very, very, well done. And I greatly look forward to whatever else is coming along!
Author's reply
Hmm, catch up with you on canon? I don't think so! LOL But your own writing is unique and wonderful. I'm in turn looking forward to whatever else comes along from you. :) As for what's coming from me... *eyeing WIPs* Ummm... at this point, there's no telling, but something's sure to come along, one way or another.
Inzilbeth
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
Ah, this is a wonderful conclusion to your most excellent story. It's been a triumph from start to finish and one of the best long Aragorn stories around. Many congratulations!
Author's reply
Thank you, Inzilbeth! I'm so glad you enjoyed this story... it was so much fun to write and to think about. I'm actually going to miss it. But it does feel good to have it done at last. Thank you for all the support and the reviews and straightening me out when my story strayed from canon. :)
Ainu Laire
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
Awesome ending! You inspired me to write a few words- despite the horrible time of night *sigh*. You, you, you...
Still, I loved it. Closure for this story, opening for another...
Author's reply
Thanks, Laire... glad you liked the ending! Sounds like you had one of those nights like mine, up when no decent person should be. Ah well. I'm glad I gave you something to do. ;) And yes, closure finally for Aragorn here, and new adventures waiting. Thanks for reading and for all the reviews you left--they mean the world!
Jay of Lasgalen
· 27 April 2009
· Chapter 26: Epilogue - The Year That Followed, Part 2
And thus starts the hunt for Gollum ...
This is a wonderful chapter, and a great ending to the story. I'm glad to see the villages being rebuilt, even if they won't flourish. Most of all I'm glad to see Aragorn no longer torn between his two worlds: 'I am wealthy beyond measure in having two homes, one here in Imladris, and one out in the lands of the Dúnedain. Few men are so blessed.'
Oh, and Gandalf is wonderfully enigmatic!
Author's reply
Thank you, Jay! Yes, isn't Gandalf fun? I love it when he, like Aragorn says, turns incomprehensible. *grin* And it was nice to show Aragorn at peace with things at last. He's had a hard journey through this story. Thanks for reading and for all your reviews!