Reviews of While Hope Lasts

Linda Hoyland · 11 March 2009 · Chapter 5: Elrondion

Thorondir's death was heartrending. This was an excellent story,which shed new light on these oft told events and felt original.I look forward to more of your stories.

Linda Hoyland · 11 March 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

I'm glad they didn't kill Halpharn and his sister is recovering.It would be an interesting future story if an adukt Aragorn came across the outcast. By the way,if you give an unconcious person a drink,they choke.There is a doctor on LJ who discusses medical errors in stories and that is one she mentions the most often. I'm glad Gilraen is going to take Aragorn to Rivendell.I like your take on it as it seems very plausible.

eldawisdom · 14 February 2009 · Chapter 5: Elrondion

I have read a few thousand fan fics (good, bad, and indifferent)and I have to tell you that you are a brilliant writer. From start to finish, you had my total attention. The interplay of relationships and feelings and the detail of the battles was very intense. You must keep writing. :) Take Care, Teri

Author's reply

Thanks for the wonderful feedback! I'm glad to hear it kept your attention; pacing was one of the things I spent a lot of time on in this story, so it's good to know it paid off in the end. I'm so glad you enjoyed this story. -Brennan

Agape4Gondor · 13 February 2009 · Chapter 5: Elrondion

I wasn't going to leave much of a review as I am still weeping... but seeing that this is the last chapter.... I very much liked this tale. Not only was it well written, it was gripping. The characters were well thought out and believable and the circumstances were all to plausible... I do so hope that we might 'see' some of these folk again in your writings. I'm putting your name in for notification for when you post something again. Many thanks for sharing this with us. *heavy sigh* Still trying to recover from such sorrow.....

Author's reply

Yes, this is not a happy story, though I'd like to think it's a hopeful one. I'm glad you liked it despite the sorrow (or perhaps because of it?). As for the characters, they're all still running around in my head, so odds are good that they'll turn up in something I write in the future. Thanks for all your support. -Brennan

Larner · 12 February 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

I rejoice Halpharn was given the chance to live and hopefully one day redeem himself--and perhaps you will one day write THAT story, too. And Laleth will at least be returned to her family--what remains of it. And one day the masked Man will be found--and dealt with! And the decision has been made, as painful as it is! I, too, have considered that part of the reason for the decision to take Aragorn to Imladris had to do with Dunedain being suborned and coerced to treason. But that they would use children so--all too plausible, I fear. Well done.

Author's reply

Thanks for the awesome review! Yes, things are winding down in this story. I hope to write more with these characters somewhere down the road. A treacherous Ranger was part of the orginal conception for this story. It wasn't till later, as I was brainstorming Gilraen's motivations, that the corruption of a child came into play. I was trying to show Gilraen realizing that there are dangers to Dunedain kids that go beyond the fear that they might be killed. I hope you enjoy the conclusion which should be posted soon. -Brennan

Raksha The Demon · 11 February 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

What a chapter - Halpharn's fate is agonizing to watch, though I cannot blame the Dunedain for exiling him. They simply cannot afford an untrustworthy link in their chain. The boy is lucky; had he been older, he probably would have been executed. But it's terribly sad; he was young and now he'll be an exile all his life; a life that may not be too long. As far as concrit goes, there isn't much to give. The story is mostly riveting and well-written. I have two minor quibbles: (1)you use the adjective little in connection with small children (i.e. Laleth and Aragorn) a bit too often within a paragraph; the reader does not have to be reminded more than once that the child is little. Also, I couldn't understand why Scumbucket Herumor took Laleth with him, especially since she could barely stand up and even he thought that she wouldn't fetch much of a price in slave markets. I know that for the purposes of the plot, Herumor had to take Laleth with him on his horse so she could escape; but I thought there needed to be a better reason for it; since you pretty much established that she had become utterly useless to him. The only reasons I could think of are pretty horrible, but would make more sense to me. I'm so glad that Laleth escaped and will hopefully be reunited with her poor mother. What will Lothiriel think of her son Halpharn's being exiled as a traitor, I wonder? Very sad, but also realistic. I can certainly see why Gilrain wants to bring her little boy to a place that's as protected and peaceful as Imladris; there's only so much the poor young woman can take.

Author's reply

Thanks for a wonderful review and some great concrit! Word repetition is one of the major things I struggle with in my writing, maybe because I write in short bursts and then forget to go back and make everything cohesive. As for Herumor taking Laleth, I wish I had taken more time to develop that, but I didn't want to weigh the plotline down. My thinking at the time was that he wanted a hostage in case the Rangers caught up with him--they'd be less likely to shoot at him if there was a danger of killing one of their own kids. Though, he is twisted enough to take pleasure in more horrible uses that I can't bring myself to describe here. I'm glad you enjoyed this chap! Thanks for all the feedback! -Brennan

Agape4Gondor · 11 February 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

Hmmmm - great chapter and I loved Gilraen's final reason for taking Aragorn to Imladris.... I'm not sure if the boy really could have survived the branding without becoming unconscious and I really cannot see the pain easing so quickly - no matter Ranger remedies... even an iron burn on the hand lasts forever... at least IMHO. I think the poor boy should have been executed - for mercy's sake. To leave him in the wild and banished.... just my own feeling. Great chapter as I said above. Well worth reading!

Author's reply

Thanks for another wonderful review! Yes, the remedy was a small example of reality sacrificed on the altar of plot development. To get the tone of the scene right, it was important that he leave at that point, and I couldn't see Rangers banishing a child--even a traitor--if he were seriously hurt. On the other hand, there is evidence that ancients had much higher pain threshold that we novacaine-pampered people, so that, coupled with his heritage as a Dunedain (hardiest of all living Men) may explain how he bounced back so quickly. I wondered, as well, whether an execution might have been more plausible, but in the end I couldn't see them doing it. Not to a child; there is always hope for a child. I tried to write him as being *almost* at the age of self-sufficiency. As a Ranger-to-be, he would have received lots of training in wilderness survival and navigation. So, while he won't have a fun time, they weren't sending him to a slow death out there. Thanks again for a great, thought-provoking review! -Brennan

Agape4Gondor · 11 February 2009 · Chapter 3: Casualty

Though my heart goes out to Gilraen - it is totally taken in concern for the two children.............. Yikes!

Author's reply

Yes, I did put them in quite a spot, didn't I? Though, as you saw in the next chap, I could quite bring myself to completely destroy them. I love my characters, but I wouldn't be surprised if they hate me most of the time. Thanks for reading! -Brennan

Envinyatar · 11 February 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

I'm loving this. You've really brought Gilraen to life, and your original characters are very convincing. The judgment scene was well done. I could feel Arandur's pain at what seems to be the only possible verdict. Dare we hope that Aragorn might encounter Halpharn at some later date... Looking forward to the end of this and many more stories from you.

Author's reply

Thanks for the lovely review! I'm glad you're enjoying these characters, especially the slew of OC's. Re Aragorn meeting Halpharn . . . that would be an interesting meeting, wouldn't it? The muse has been stewing over it for a while, so we'll see if anything comes of it. Thanks again for the support, and I hope you keep reading! -Brennan

Samara · 10 February 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

Aaaaaaaaand...you made me cry again. God, that poor girl, and although I cannot look favorably upon his actions, that boy did what he did in defense of her. It's an unpleasant business all round I do suppose. I cannot wait for the next chapter. Things are moving swiftly now and I am eager to see how they are concluded. Magnificent job.

Author's reply

Aw, don't cry! Well, okay, maybe cry--I did when I was writing this. It is indeed an unpleasant business, but I see it as one of those harsh realities the Dunedain have to face. Editing is moving swiftly as well, so I may have the conclusion up as early as tomorrow. I hope you enjoy! -Brennan

Samara · 10 February 2009 · Chapter 3: Casualty

Once again. Amazing. Things seem to really be winding up. My guess is that that poor, sweet little girl is not dead. Haramir will regret not going after her if such is the case. I hope to the Valar she does not die. No child, no little girl or boy should deserve that fate. Yet it does much to make this story realistic and enthralling. Keep up the incredible work.

Author's reply

Thank you for another wonderful review! Things are winding up a bit, yes, but there's more action to be had before all are safe and sound. Poor Laleth's fate was one of the last things I decided when plotting this story. I'm glad she drew you in. Thanks so much for the wonderful encouragement. -Brennan

Samara · 10 February 2009 · Chapter 2: Of Flames and Flight

My God. You are such a joy to read. I love the way you are pacing this fic. It is perfectly well done. You always give us a little more, yet leave us yearning to read more as well. Again, I cannot even begin to tell you how much your imagery touches me. I am severely sight impaired. I had better sight when I was small, though it never was full sight. Your imagery brings back the scenes and memories of seeing things better. You make me see again, and that more than anything makes me adore you. I always respect great authors, and I respect you for this incredible tale.

Author's reply

Every once in a while, I wonder why I devote so many hours of my life to telling these tales. Then, I get a review like this, and it makes it all worth it. I'm incredibly moved and humbled that you think so highly of my work. It truly is a labor of love for me, despite the difficult moments, and it's wonderful to know that this story somehow moved you. I truly cannot thank you enough for these wonderful reviews. Gotta go before I make myself cry. I wish you all the best, and hope you enjoy the conclusion of this story. peace, -Brennan

curiouswombat · 10 February 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

It continues to be a very powerful story, this. I want to weep for poor Halpharn, and hope he, too finds shelter and someone to care for him.

Author's reply

Thanks for the wonderful review. I'm very touched that so many readers have come to care for Halpharn as much as I myself do. I can say without giving anything away that his part in this story is over. This was meant to be a very focused story dealing with Gilraen and her immediate family, so Halpharn finding his place in the world had to be pushed to a later story. I haven't decided for certain what I'm going to do with him--whether he'll get his own story or just a small part in a larger work--but I'm not done with him yet. The conclusion to Gilraen's story should be up soon. I hope you enjoy! -Brennan

Raksha The Demon · 10 February 2009 · Chapter 2: Of Flames and Flight

Minor concrit: The young woman had told Arandur how she had given up hope of seeing her tiny sons again when Gilraen walked, soot-streaked and shell-shocked, into the makeshift camp with both children in tow. - the term shell-shocked is much too modern for the story, at least in my opinion; it speaks to me too much of World Wars I and II; not to mention that I think shell references bullets, which are not prevalent in Middle-earth in the late Third Age. I really like this story; it's such a good portrayal of the very difficult and endangered lives of the Northern Dunedain. Arandur's discussion of the Dunedain's purpose is quite interesting; I wonder what he and the others thought of the Elf-raised Estel when Aragorn returned to their people, and later, when Aragorn seemed to be off wandering more than he was ruling as Chieftain. I'm not sure that the Southern Dunedain would agree that their main purpose in life was to protect the exiled king, though! Would there be more Dunedain in Aragorn's time if they had been less devoted to maintaining Isildur's line, or allowed sister-sons to inherit?

Author's reply

Thanks for the concrit. "Shell-shock" Gheeze. I have a bad habit of writing whatever word pops into my head first without pausing to think about the connotations. Thanks for such a thoughtful review as well. I think you've put your finger on the difference between Northern and Southern Dunedain. Yes, there might be more in the North if they hadn't devoted so much to protecting their chieftain. On the other hand, might there not be a king of Anarion's line still in the South had they focused more on protecting the bloodline? -Brennan

Elflingimp · 10 February 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

You are definetly doing it right as far as I am concerned,I felt so bad for the little girl and for her brother, for all he cared for her he will probably never see her again, but I understood he could not be trusted again, I wonder in the future how Aragorn when he is older will feel about this boy who caused Arathorns death. Hugs The Imp

Author's reply

Yeah, I wonder too . . . Thanks for the great review! The feedback means a lot to me, especially since this was such a difficult chapter to write. -Brennan

eliza61 · 10 February 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

Now this is just wonderful, I am having an absolute horrid day (through no fault of my own) with my kids acting like little orcs when suddenly one of my favorite stories has a new chapter. Hooray!! Only to be left with a cliffee.. I would say that, that was evil but this is simply too marvelous a story. You are doing a marvelous job. I love how you fleshed out your supporting stories and really like your portrayal of Gilraen. Her interaction with her brother and Aragorn are great. *sighs* Now I have to hang on until my next update. back to my little orcies.

Author's reply

Glad you enjoyed it! Sorry about the cliffee. The conclusion should be up soon, after which I promise at least *fewer* loose ends. Thanks for all the wonderful feedback! Hope things are going well with the orclings. -Brennan

Jay of Lasgalen · 10 February 2009 · Chapter 4: Somebody's Child

*Sigh* Poor Halpharn. What he did was so terribly wrong, yet I feel sorry for him. But what else could Arandur do? I'm glad Gilraen has finally seen sense and is taking young Aragorn to Imladris. I hope they arrive without incident - but I don't like your note of foreboding for Thorondir.

Author's reply

Yes. This was a situation where there was really no right answer--just one outcome that sucks slightly less than the others. Re getting to Imladris . . . well, I hope World Peace is achieved by next Tuesday, but I don't think it's likely;-) And on that cheerful note, the conclusion will probably be up tomorrow! Thanks so much for all your support, and I hope you enjoy the last chap! peace, -Brennan

Samara · 10 February 2009 · Chapter 1: To Slay a Legend

My God. You had me bawling like a baby during this first chapter. Your writing is phenominal. Your imagery is beautiful, the descriptions of emotion are heart rending and the conflicts presented are true and terrible. I don't know what I would do if I were ever presented with a decision as poor Gilraen has been, especially not after such a tragedy as that. I also must say, you write little Aragorn wonderfully. He's at that age where he doesn't really understand but does at the same time, and you capture his confusion and grief beautifully. You have a talent and a gift. Never, ever give it up.

Author's reply

I'm incredibly touched by this review and your encouragement. This story deals with a lot of difficult subject matter. I guess all I could do was portray it honestly and hope that, as they say, "beauty is truth." Thanks so much for taking the time to leave such wonderful feedback. -Brennan

Larner · 7 February 2009 · Chapter 3: Casualty

Perhaps two are now saved, if badly damaged. I hope they find this Herumor--I find I don't like him!

Author's reply

Perhaps . . . You don't like Herumor? Can't imagine why not . . . ;) The next chapter will be up tomorrow. In it, things will get better . . . and worse. And that's all I'm saying now. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! I hope you keep reading. -Brennan

Larner · 6 February 2009 · Chapter 2: Of Flames and Flight

So, that's what happened to the missing girl, and why the brother disappeared when he did--blackmail! And whether or not she likes the idea, Gilraen is on her way to Rivendell, even if the plan isn't yet formed!

Author's reply

Thanks for the review! It's good to see readers are picking up on the little details. As for Gilraen and Rivendell, more detail will be up in the next chapter (probably tomorrow). This is a gapfiller, not AU, so you know how it's all going to end, but the manner of her arrival is (hopefully) significant to my interpretation of her character. I hope you keep reading! -Brennan

Larner · 6 February 2009 · Chapter 1: To Slay a Legend

Yes, the descendants of Valandil were fostered in Rivendell, but not until they were older. Aragorn was most likely the first to be brought there as a toddler since perhaps Valandil's own day, the rest most likely coming in their early adolescence; and the only one to be considered a child of the house. But your reasoning is sound.

Author's reply

Thanks for the clarification. Sorting out all the details of Tolkien's canon will probably take me a lifetime.

Jancy · 4 February 2009 · Chapter 3: Casualty

Wow, so many good stories today. I havent read much Gilraen stories. This one has a nice suspense to it.

Author's reply

Thanks for the lovely review! I've read a few stories by different authors featuring Gilraen. For this one, I tried to mix external action with emotional tension. There are only a few chaps left in this tale, so I hope you enjoy where it goes. -Brennan

Elentarri · 3 February 2009 · Chapter 3: Casualty

Lovely story. A nice original take on this part of Tolkien's work. The writing is also nice and clean. Please update very soon :-) E

Author's reply

Thanks for the wonderful review! I'm glad you're enjoying this tale. The next chapter should be posted within the next day or so. -Brennan

Linda Hoyland · 2 February 2009 · Chapter 3: Casualty

Poor Gilraen.I hope she does find the safety of Rivendell.

Author's reply

Yes, things are looking quite bleak for her at the moment. I will say, though, that this is *not* AU. More should be up soon. I hope you keep reading! -Brennan

grumpy · 2 February 2009 · Chapter 2: Of Flames and Flight

What a great story, I just love the way you have the Dunadan village. The first chapter was just wonderful and so is this one. The Dunadan want to protect Aragorn, but just do not have the means. Poor Halpharn, I think I know what is being held over him. looking forward to more.

Author's reply

Thanks for the wonderful review! It's great to know you're enjoying this story. The next chap should be up soon.

Reviews (37)