Uh oh....I have a feeling that the map won't be right and if that's the case...They're *all* dead and I'm willing to bet Elrond will commission Glorfindel to do it too. After all, if he can take on a Balrog...On second thought, the way things are going, even he might not make it out alive. :oD
This is just such a fantastic story. I was so happy to see an update in my Inbox tonight. Sorry to hear you've been busy, but I know all about that. This summer's been wild around here too. Looking forward to the next installment.
Poor Elrond had better have a full stock of those herbs. I have a feeling he's going to need them. ;o)
Author's reply
Mwahaha, I'm feeling quite wicked with this story. Elrond's ire is growing, and everyone needs to watch out. Big time.
I'm hoping to get the next chapter posted soon. Things are finally calming down!
Shieldmaiden of Rohan
· 21 August 2005
· Chapter 11: Chapter Eleven: Venting
I loved the argument between Elrond and Gandalf about whether Merry and Pippin would go. Though I would think, after that, that Elrond would want them as far away from him as possible! Aragorn's reaction was quite amusing as well. And Pippin's jealousy that Merry was being the melodramatic one. :D
Author's reply
Lol, I was writing the beginning of the chapter, and the scene from the book where Elrond feels that Merry and Pippin shouldn't go along, but Gandalf supports them, popped into my head and I went "Bingo!" Funny how that worked out. ^_^
Pippin is feeling very put-upon. Merry keeps dragging him into havoc and then panicking, and Pippin doesn't like it. Let's hope he doesn't decide to retaliate on Merry, too!
"Elrond sighed and rubbed his temples. Gandalf opened a window." Poor Elrond. He's venting in more ways than one. I still can't believe Legolas hasn't retaliated in some way for the exploding privy. I guess order will have to be restored in Imladris sometime, and it looks like Gandalf will get to the bottom of things. ...Unless he gets caught in the crossfire like Elrond! :-D ~TF
Author's reply
I have a LiveJournal icon that shows Elrond rubbing his temples with the caption, "As long as you all get out of my house, you know, whatever." I swear, it pops into my head everytime I write Elrond in this fic. The poor elf desperately needs some rest and relaxation.
Legolas is biding his time. He has a long time in the baths to contemplate revenge, and he rightly guesses who's idea the exploding privy was. Stay tuned. :)
I think Gandalf is an Untouchable. He has the power to reduce them all to small, slimy creatures if he wishes, which makes him an ideal go-between for both parties. Although I will admit to being tempted to quote Monty Python in this!
Andrea
· 21 August 2005
· Chapter 11: Chapter Eleven: Venting
This story continues to make me laugh :)
I liked this bit of dialogue:
“Very good. And inform Merry and Pippin that they are not going on the Quest.”
“Yes, they are.”
“No, they are not.”
[...]
Gandalf rolled his eyes as he left the room. “Yes, they are.”
Gandalf knows now about the map, but I have the feeling that knows more. Is there something "special" about this "certain" map?
Author's reply
The map is definitely key. You may be on to something. I'm glad you like it!
Wow, & I thought the last chapter was hyspertical!!! Whenever I need a laugh now, I can just picture an angry Elrond bashing the hell out his herbs, farting, while Gandalf nonchalantly opens a window to get some air.
Liked Pippin's "I'm the baby of the family, therefore I should be the melodramatic one" and Aragorn's new-found respect for the younger hobbits.
I can't wait for more!!!
Author's reply
Poor Elrond. I can just see him wilting with relief once the Fellowship is out of the valley.
Pippin is feeling quite put-upon. The others had better be careful.
Aragorn has to concede that the hobbits have guts. He's not going to be so amused soon, though!
Ah, Gandalf is finally going to get to the heart of the matter! And this is hysterical -- finally we know why Legolas was chosen as one of Frodo's companions!
"Legolas taunted the bubbles? Well, that settles the question of which Elf belongs in the Fellowship. It will be best for him to get as far from her as possible,” Elrond sighed. At least he had one concern taken care of.
Author's reply
Yes, I thought it might be funny to have Legolas on the Quest for his own protection. Mordor hath no fury like Arwen scorned, after all. ^_^
I'm glad Gandalf got round to asking the cause of the problem. It just goes to show that being a zillion year old Istar does qualify him to lead the Fellowship - at least until he decides to go diving in the chasms of Moria with a really hot creature.
Merry thinks he and Pippin are about to become fish food, does he? Perhaps Elrond should work on maintaining that impression for a while. I think Elrond has a bigger problem with the strawberry-bubble-bathed Arwen. She's known her adar long enough to realise that he isn't about to terminate her existence - or that of her beloved, because he's just too gosh-darned reasonable.
Of course, he could join in the fun. . . No, he wouldn't do something like that. He's too busy worrying about saving the world.
Author's reply
Gandalf is a good go-between because he can turn them all into newts if he wants. This, of course, makes me desperately want to quote Monty Python: "He turned me into a newt!" Lol.
I feel bad for Elrond. His peaceful city is going wild, and his daughter is being crazy about bubble bath. I really am going to have to explain that one.
You know, I can just see Elrond throwing them all out of Rivendell onto the Quest just to get some peace and quiet back. Poor guy. :)
Oh no! That infamous map! Tell me *why* I am suddenly regarding it with utmost suspicion?
And I loved this bit:
We are most certainly dead. We should never have started this,” Merry moaned, pulling at his hair. He lay on his bed, writhing. “Do you suppose that they will torture us before they kill us, or just throw us off one of the waterfalls?”
Pippin shrugged and didn’t answer. He rather resented Merry’s attack of melodrama; he felt it was his place, as the baby of the family, to be the one with the attack of the vapors. *snicker* That is *so* Merry&Pippin!
Author's reply
You do right to regard it with suspicion. Many heads will be hitting desks because of that map. *evil grin*
Merry and Pippin are so much fun to write. I just love those two. :)
Wow, magnificent idea, that of a true mischeif lover! I can't wait to read more.
-Your Fellow Author
Hai Took
· 6 August 2005
· Chapter 10: Chapter Ten: Farting Powder
HaHaHa! That was great! I do hope Lord Elrond won't be seeking revenge...of course that would be an awfully quick end to this story. I thoughg perhaps they had were about to embarrass Lady Arwen and they were going to be an ally short! But this was so much better! Looking forward to more!
ROTFLMAO!
Ok, I have small children so bodily noises are considered very funny in my household.
Poor Elrond this time. Can't wait to see what happens next.
You know, if you need ideas for pranks, come talk to me. I was a really rotten kid. I can't remember the name of it right off the top of my head, but there's this kind of mild acid that will eat through fabric but not plastic or wood. Really interesting if it's put on someone's seat. They don't notice until it's too late. It's a great way to em-bare-ass a target.
You can also use chemicals, such as would be found in a wizard's possession or in a healer's, to chemically etch words or pictures into wood, brick, or stone when you apply fire to them.
Small pieces of wood, such as toothpicks, when dampened and inserted into locks then broken off make it necessary to replace the lock.
The possibilities are endless.
Needless to say, I'm really enjoying this story.
Aragorn laughed. “I must say I am glad that it is you and not me. Hold on, Legolas, we’re getting to you as fast as we can.”
Wow, nothing like sincere sympathy from your friends when your dignity is already in the...privy. Legolas seems a bit too calm. Maybe he's on a slow burn. I have a feeling Arwen and the hobbits are in for it. I LOVE this story!
~TF
Somehow I missed the last three chapters. ...And you blew up Legolas in the privy??? Oh my gosh! That is hilarious! No one is safe! I have to go on to the next chapter now and see the rest. ~TF
eliza
· 6 August 2005
· Chapter 10: Chapter Ten: Farting Powder
Thank you for the story, I'm reading this chapter at work & it's hard to keep my laughter down to a dull roar. Of course I'm rooting for Merry & Pippin. As with every parent who has every considered strangling their offspring, I bet Elrond is wishing he'd sail for the west already. All your characters are great. Tell Boromir, I suggest he's stay out of it.
Until next time,
Eliza
How I managed to miss this gem up until now I'll never know. Very well done!
And poor Legolas! Having less than fond memories of my great-grandmother's old two-holer in the middle of summer, my sympathies are firmly with the elf at the moment. Doesn't mean I wasn't laughing like a fool through the entire chapter, but Legolas definitely needs a hug after this one. As soon as he bathes, of course. :-p
Can't wait to see what happens next.
ROTFLMAO!!!!!! This chapter most defintely deserves a review as it brought tears of laughter to my eyes. I knew I loved Bilbo!!!!(I wonder if he ever used his special powder in anything he ever served the Sackville-Bagginses--hmm there's another story idea)!!! At first I thought Merry put it into Arwen's cup, but Elrond's was even better. And Frodo just sitting back and taking it all in . . . I can't wait to see what you have in store next.I would absolutely LOVE to hear Elrond's conversation with Gandalf after this little incident.
Andrea
· 6 August 2005
· Chapter 10: Chapter Ten: Farting Powder
ROFL! Farting powder! A capital idea.
“Merry,” Pippin whispered. “We’re in trouble. More trouble than before, I think.” - I should think so, though I really don't know what could possibly happen, when Lord Elrond gets very, very angry!
“Here’s to Rivendell. May it’s winds never be unsullied.” Frodo enjoys these pranks very much, but he should be wary, too. In this story, everything is possible ;-)
I joined Arwen in laughing until I cried. What I would give to see this scene in the movie!!!!
I am feeling a tiny bit sorry for the Hobbits, however. I would not want Elrond to be plotting against me.
Sweet ERU!! ROFL!!! of all the people on Arda...I would ummm...back away really really slowly...yeah...ummm maybe go hide out in moria...Im sure the balrogs great protection against extremely furious elf-lords..hehehe..
Faith,the Sue Slayer
Proud member of IMSGSET and the Sue Squad
Ohmigosh! I am *howling*! This is the best yet! *FARTING POWDER*
Oh golly! Oh gee whiz! *wipes eyes*chuckle*snicker*grin*
And *Bilbo* giving it to them! And of course, they put it into *Elrond's* cup! Oh gosh!!
*clears throat* Ahem! Uh, that was very crude, *snicker*giggle* and uh, *chuckle* I hope that Elrond speaks very sternly to the culprits...uh-huh.
*snort*
Ohhhh...Now *that* was brilliant!! I can just see that entire scene in my head so perfectly. The elegant, serene, all wise Elven Lord at dinner w/his foster son and his daughter and then...Pffft!!! ROTFLOL!!!
They. Are. So. Dead.
I can't wait for more!! :oD
Bwahahahaha! Oh dear....
Let me guess; Elrond is going to retaliate? I imagine having lived do long he's probably got some pretty good tricks up his sleeve.