Title: Merry`s Secret

Author: Anso the Hobbit

Beta: Marigold

Characters: The hobbits, including Bilbo

Timeline: Rivendell SR 1419

Summary: Merry has a secret…

------------------------------------------------------------

Part One: Confession

”Bilbo” Merry said, his eyes downcast and his face contrite. “May I talk to you for a moment?”

“Of course, my lad. What is it?” The old hobbit looked at his young relative with curiosity. Why did Merry voluntarily come to him with such a guilty look upon his face? Had Frodo perhaps sent him to make up for some misdeed? “Come, walk with me. It’s always nice to have a smoke after a good meal, and I’ve had no news of Buckland for ages! Tell me Merry-lad, how’s business going? Is your mother well?” He took Merry by the elbow and steered the two of them towards the gardens. Upon reaching the stairs, Merry gently took his elderly cousin`s arm and helped Bilbo descend to the gardens.

Frodo had been healed to the extent Lord Elrond could manage, and the Council was over and done. All the hobbits were enjoying the waiting time in Rivendell, although with anticipation of upcoming decisions and the journey ahead. Merry and Pippin wandered about the Elven abode and sometimes Frodo and Sam, and on a few occasions, even Bilbo went with them. Most of the talk though, had been about Frodo and the Quest to come, and Bilbo had not had time yet to talk to Merry or Pippin about the goings on of the Tookland or Buckland. So it was with a great deal of anticipation that the old hobbit sat down on a bench in a secluded corner, Merry beside him. They lit their pipes.

“Now, then. What was it you wanted to talk about?” Bilbo asked after they had discussed in depth the delicious luncheon they had just shared with the other hobbits and Merry had satisfied Bilbo`s curiosity about various Buckland business and on-goings.

“I have a confession to make.” Merry finally said. He looked at his old cousin for a moment, but saw no judgement in the warm, brown eyes.

“Is that so, Meriadoc? What have you done now?” Bilbo could not help but ask, amusement and expectations of tales about wild behaviour in his eyes.

Merry laughed and shook his head, then drew a deep breath. “Bilbo…” He suddenly stopped, gathering courage. The tips of his ears grew red and he felt like a little lad again. What would Bilbo say? Merry gathered his thoughts and plunged into it.

“I knew of the Ring before Frodo left. I have known of it since before you left actually.” Merry stopped and looked at Bilbo, trying to discern what the other one might think of this. Merry had pondered how to tell the Ring-finder about his knowledge of the Ring. For some reason he felt that Bilbo had to know. Frodo might have told him, but if he had, he hadn’t told Merry about it. And how would Bilbo react to this information, suddenly talking about the Ring so long after he had given it away? By all accounts the Ring could do strange things to the bearer, and Bilbo had held it long. He wondered suddenly if he should be talking about the Ring with Bilbo at all.

Merry remembered Bilbo as a kind, loving old relative that doled out sweets and pats on the head. Fondly Merry remembered his blackberry tarts and cinnamon biscuits. He almost was hungry again at the thought. Bilbo had patched up scrapes and dried tears, given hugs and when necessary, scolding sternly but fondly. He was an awe-inspiring hobbit that had seen the Outside and told wonderful tales full of elves and men and dragons. And he had led Merry into the secret world of understanding maps. Merry loved his old cousin dearly, and had missed him terribly when he left all those years ago. Now Merry was drawn back into the present by his cousin’s voice.

“How is that possible? How could you have known?” Bilbo said, his voice even, but there was a hint that he did not quite know what to believe before the whole tale was told. “Did Frodo tell you about the Ring?” Bilbo knew that next to himself, Merry was the hobbit Frodo would sit down and serious talk with, but he did not believe his dear Frodo would have told Merry about the Ring, secret as it was.

“No, nothing like that. He tried to hide it, but we caught him in the end.” Merry said with a twinkle in his eye. “I knew about it long ago. I saw you put it on once, and…” Merry cast his eyes down again, blushing slightly. “And I’ve read your book.” Merry cringed away a little, as if expecting a blow he knew his older cousin never had and never would give him.

Shock filled Bilbo`s eyes, before he nodded slowly. That he had known of the Ring before Frodo left, did not surprise Bilbo. He knew Merry. But that Merry had known of it before he had left himself, now that was news to Bilbo. But, he asked himself, should he really have been surprised? In his opinion, Frodo was the best hobbit in the Shire, but he had always counted young Merry a close second. The line of the Masters of Buckland were known for their sharp minds, and the lad’s grandfather, Rory, and his father, Saradoc, were Brandybucks through and through and Merry had inherited more than just the Brandybuck features. And his mother was a Took, and a very Tookish one at that. A combination to be reckoned with, and Bilbo had noticed even when Merry was very small that the lad possessed many of the best qualities of both bloodlines. No, if anyone in the Shire were to have discovered the existence of the Ring, he might have guessed it would be Meriadoc.

 “I might have known. It seems that you are quite thorough in your investigations my lad. I suspect you planned this current conspiracy too?

Merry nodded. “I had good help in Sam and Pip, though.” Bilbo had been told some of the tale about how the conspiracy came to be, but how Merry first came to know about the Ring had been left out. “I first told Frodo that I knew of the Ring at Crickhollow.” Merry continued. “He was quite shocked to learn that I knew of its existence.” Bilbo shook his head, and looked back at Merry.

“So tell me Meriadoc. How did you come to know of my old Ring then?” Bilbo said, adventure and mischief dancing in his old eyes. There was a tale to be told, and this time Bilbo was the listener and not the storyteller.

Part Two: Bilbo`s Secret

“I was in Hobbiton on a combined errand for my father and to visit you and Frodo.” Merry said, remembering the day he had seen Bilbo put on the Ring. “It was a warm and sunny summer day, and I was quite happy because Da had sent me to see to that a shipment of ropes and tiles were sent back to Buckland as arranged. I was only 18, and I thought it a great responsibility. It was on my way back towards Bag End that I saw you.”

 “I remember. You had visited on your own of course, but that was the first time you had come on Brandybuck business.”

“Yes. I remember that my father had given me a stern talk before I left about being careful and not do anything I was not supposed to.”  Merry chuckled. “He had nothing to fear of course, I would not ruin this by some adventurous escapade. That could wait until I had finished my errand.”

“All right, you saw me on the road, but why did you not come up to me then?”

“Because I saw someone further up the road that I did not want to bump into, and knowing you, neither would you. They were why you put on the Ring.”

“The Sackville-Bagginses?”

“Yes.” Merry said.

“Well. What did you do then?”

“It was just by the Cotton`s farm and if you remember they have a hedge going alongside the fields.” Merry waited for Bilbo to remember. He nodded.

“I got over my surprise at seeing you disappear and slipped inside the hedge and walked along the road on the inside. You were still on the road, standing still I believe. It was not long before the Sackville-Bagginses passed by, and they did not see either of us. They walked past where you stood and after a few moments you reappeared, and from my hiding point I saw something glinting gold.”

“Then what happened?”

“You walked towards Bag End on the road, and I went back into the road after a little while and followed along behind. I wasn’t sure what to say to you, so I didn’t try to catch you up immediately. I finally met up with you on the Hill - I remember Frodo was happy to have both of us home at the same time because he had made his wonderful potato and mushroom pie.”

“Hmm…” Bilbo said, thinking this over. “What did you think when I suddenly disappeared from your sight?”

“I was shocked. I had never seen anything like it, and at first, while I was trying to hide myself properly, I thought there was some truth in what people said about Mad Baggins. But I had heard too many of your stories to believe that there could not be some magic involved. I remember that I did not sleep much that night and Frodo asking me if I was all right the next morning. I had used the night to think, and must have looked a wretch. I understood that it had something to do with your old stories and I got very curious about the business.” He blushed. “I must confess I started to spy on you.”

“What?” Bilbo looked at Merry in amazement. This was almost too much for an old hobbit to manage. “Is nothing safe?” He cried.

Merry couldn`t answer that, and continued with his story. “I admit I spied on both you and Frodo. Remember, this was approximately a year before you left the Shire, and that means that you must have started thinking about leaving soon. It would not be long before Frodo came of age, and you could leave Bag End to him, and be off – here.” Merry said with a gesture towards their surroundings.

“What did you think then, that night when you could not sleep?” Bilbo asked. “You remember everything else quite clearly, surely you remember that too?” He was a little disconcerted by Merry`s tale, but at the same time it amused him to get the knowledge of how Merry had come to know about his Ring. He had been careful with using it, and always looked back and forth and to the sides if he put it on in public. No doubt he had been in such a hurry to escape the S.B.’s that day that he had not looked around carefully enough.

“Yes, I remember that sleepless night.” Merry said. “I thought about the glint of gold that I had seen in the road, and I recalled seeing you fiddle on occasion with a shiny gold ring that you always kept safely on a chain fastened to your waistcoat. A ring that you would tuck away when you realised that you were not alone. I remember that I retold all your stories to myself to see if this ring of yours had ever been mentioned, and it had not. I remembered your riddle game with Gollum and that you never actually told us what you had in your pockets. I realised that it might be that ring. Also, I remembered that you never explained exactly how you floated unseen down to Lake Town in that barrel. The answer seemed simple to me after seeing you vanish in the road. You had a ring that made you disappear!”

“Reasoned out like a true Brandybuck!” Bilbo laughed a little before he became serious again.  “You said you spied on me?”

“Yes. After that day on the road I spied on you, and later on Frodo too, or else I would not have been here. I followed your moves more closely after that day. And as I said, I read your secret book. Just a quick glimpse, but what I saw was wonderful!” Merry`s whole face lit up at the memory. Oh, how he would like another glimpse - or better yet - a thorough read of that book! He wasn`t sure Bilbo would grant him that though, now that he knew all about Merry`s spying and secret reading. On the other hand – maybe Bilbo would let him have his read so that he really knew and stopped guessing.

“Perhaps I’ll let you have a good look at it, now you are here…” Bilbo mused, before fixing his eyes on his young cousin again. “You never told me you had seen the Ring.”

Yes! Merry thought happily to himself, before focusing on the conversation again. “Of course not. It was your secret, and not mine to tell, and I thought it quite exciting to know one of your secrets. I didn`t tell Frodo I knew of the Ring until the night before we left Crickhollow. You were clever in hiding it and in hiding your decision about going off. Frodo wasn`t that clever about it. He kept saying ‘Will I ever look upon that valley again?’ and such things. We could see it wearing on him. He got a sad, faraway look in his eyes, and when we tramped around he drank it all in; the woods and meadows and fields and villages. Your escape was more concealed, and Gandalf tricked everyone with his flash of light when you disappeared at the Party. I remember Grandfather Rory saying that he had suspected you would be going off soon. But because I knew about the Ring, I was probably the only one except Frodo and Gandalf that actually knew what had happened.”

“Hmmm…” Bilbo had not heard much about what happened at the end of the Party, but he knew of course of Gandalf`s dazzling flash of light as it had caught him quite off guard himself.

The old Baggins and the young Brandybuck sat smoking for a while, thinking about days long past, before Bilbo finally broke the silence again.

“Come Merry-lad, tell me about how you discovered my secret book and what you found there! Surely this must be another exciting tale?” Bilbo said, and wriggled in to a more comfortable position on the bench. It would soon be time for tea, but he had to hear this first.

Part Three: The Secret Book

Merry shook out his pipe and filled it again. A good tale was always better with a pipe; he had learned that from Bilbo. He lit the pipe and puffed contentedly for a few moments, gathering his thoughts.

“I didn’t actually manage to read very much, and to be honest, what I did read left me with more questions than answers. I had to figure out a whole lot on my own, and a good deal of what I read that day left me with unanswered questions until we formed the conspiracy to follow Frodo and I was able to learn some things from Sam.” Merry said.

“But you read enough to understand what happened when I left and later what Frodo was planning.” Bilbo said, not letting himself be fooled by Merry trying to be contrite.

“Yes. That I did. Though I understood what Frodo was planning because I know him so well. He didn’t manage to pull the wool over my eyes the way that you managed to do. I know Frodo better than I had known you after all. I knew that he would follow after you someday, and I always meant to go with him when he did, so I kept my eyes open. ” Merry said.

“How did you find the book? I never left it lying about, and I don`t think Frodo spoke to you about it either. Come to that, how did you even know that it existed?”

 “It was your love of books and tales that made me start to wonder if perhaps you might have been writing a book of your own, long before I ever had that glimpse of the ring. Your stories were too good not to be passed on, and I thought that you would want to preserve them for us younger hobbits, especially as I always felt that you would leave the Shire someday. You would speak of your adventures sometimes with such longing that I knew that the Shire wouldn’t always be able to hold you.  You were often locked for hours in your study, and when you came out your fingers were almost always stained with ink. And you put your elven translations and your poems in books – why not your stories? After I saw you vanish on the road, I reasoned that if you were writing a book, then a magic ring that made you disappear would be certain to be in it.”

Bilbo laughed. “Logical and insightful! Just like a Brandybuck. And how did you manage to find it?”

“I had another clue. Whenever I was allowed in your study, I couldn’t help but notice that, no matter how many papers and books were strewn about, there was always a cleared space of a certain size on your desk, just the right size for an opened book. As I had never seen you carry the book out with you when you left the study, I decided that you must keep it in there. I was ready to look for it under your bed though, if I didn`t find it where I thought it would be.” Merry smiled and looked at Bilbo, hoping the elder hobbit wouldn`t think too ill of him after the whole tale was told. He had after all snooped around in quite private matters. Merry stood and started pacing. A few elves and men could be seen in the distance, but none of them were coming in the hobbits` direction. Even if the council were done and over with, there were still several large groups of delegates that had not yet left Rivendell.

“Meriadoc my boy. Stop that pacing and continue with your story.” Bilbo drew Merry`s attention back to the storytelling. Merry sat down again, resuming his tale.

“I think it was a few days after I had seen you put the Ring on that I reached the conclusion that to learn about your secret ring, I must find your secret book. It wasn`t easy you know, getting access to your study without you or Frodo being there. Both you and Frodo spent much time there. Pip had come up from the Smials too, which did not make the task easier. Not in the least.”

Bilbo laughed. “No I should think not. That lad is a handful at the best of times. Just as you are.”

Merry smiled. “Yes.”

“How did you manage it then?” Bilbo pressed on.

“I was quite determined I remember, and once I even tried to find it in the middle of the night!” Merry laughed a little at his own desperation. “But typically enough, Frodo couldn`t sleep that particular night and was roaming the kitchen for something to eat and heard me coming. Luckily he just assumed that I was hungry too. And I didn`t know exactly what I was looking for. I knew it was a book or at the very least notes, but that study was so filled with notes and books that it was almost impossible to find anything with everything lying about and no order to things. It`s a wonder to me how you never failed to find what you were looking for in that mess. I remember even trying to pry information out of Frodo asking him about any special books you might be writing rather than translating and how you worked. I had to stop though, because he became suspicious.”

“Frodo didn`t know that much himself then. He knew I was writing everything down, but he had hardly seen the book himself.” Bilbo said.

“Once I set my mind to finding it nothing coud stop me and there were only a few times when I got a brief opportunity to look for the book. When I finally found it – hidden in a chest and under some papers – I was almost discovered and had to put it back quickly. It was very disappointing! I didn’t even have the opportunity to open it. I finally managed to get some minutes in the study alone, when I knew that both you and Frodo were otherwise occupied. The Gaffer had called you out to the garden to look at something and Frodo was bathing Pip I think. I may have found where you kept the book, but I didn’t know just where in it to look to find information about your ring. I think you must have written most of your travels in that book by then, as I found several stories I recognised.”

“But how then did you find the story about my Ring?” Bilbo said eagerly. Now they were coming to it.

“I scanned through the text as fast as I could, not knowing when you might be finished talking to the Gaffer or Frodo would finish bathing Pip. It was sheer luck really, that I came upon your description of how you were able to slip past the goblins, when you lost your buttons. But once I found a reference to the Ring I scarcely had time to read more than a few sentences before I suddenly heard the back door close and put the book back real quick. You came into the study silent as any hobbit and I had a hard time trying to explain what I was doing there. Do you remember?”

Bilbo had leaned forward, eager to hear more of Merry`s story, but sat back in his seat, thinking. “No… Wait. Yes! Yes, I remember you saying that Pip wanted a story while taking his bath. You knew very well that the books with children’s stories were not in my study but in the sitting room. You said that he had grown tired of those books and wanted something else.”

Merry laughed. “Did you suspect anything? You was quite shocked earlier today when I told you I`d found your book.”

“If I suspected anything, I forgot about it quickly. There was no reason for me to think that you knew anything. I reasoned that if you were up to some sort of mischief that I’d find out about it sooner or later, as indeed, I finally have! ” Bilbo said.

“I was quite desperate Bilbo, and I even offered to dust the study, hoping to get another look. Both you and Frodo were shocked at that. But as it happened, that was my only glimpse of the book. I have hungered for more to this day.”

“Why didn`t you just ask me what happened when I disappeared?” Bilbo asked, after thinking a little about Merry’s tale.

“Judging from how you had behaved on the road I didn`t think you would answer me. I could tell you considered it a secret, and I know that I should not have acted as I did, but I was only a teen and just couldn’t bear not knowing.” Merry said.

“Well, after going to all of that effort what did you think? Did it meet your approval?” Bilbo was curious of the younger hobbit`s reaction to his story.

“It was a whole new experience seeing your adventures set out in a book compared to hearing the stories told by you of course. And your drawings – beautiful! You left out some very juicy details when you told us your tales; things that would have frightened the most adventurous hobbit lad!”

Bilbo just laughed.

“So, what exactly did you learn about the Ring?”

“You found it in the caves in the mountains, where Gollum was. But you did not know its purpose then?”

“I didn’t know what the ring really was at that point, nor did Gandalf. Certainly had I known the ring’s true nature I never would have burdened poor Frodo with it.” Bilbo sighed resentfully and emptied his pipe and put it back in his pocket. He squinted his eyes against the autumn sun. “Well, Meriadoc. I should say it`s time for tea, don`t you think? All this talking makes a hobbit hungry.” Bilbo rose and straightened his weskit.

“Tea it is, Cousin Bilbo” Merry said, and together they walked towards the Last Homely House.

Part Four: Epilogue

“There they are!” Pippin was all exuberant joy as he called to his cousin. “Frodo! They`re coming now.”

“And on time too. We talked about sending out a search team. You`ve been gone for hours you know.” Frodo and Pippin was long since finished with their game of chess, and had enjoyed a pipe themselves, talking to Gimli and his father Gloin, who still stayed in Rivendell as Gimli was chosen to be one of the Fellowship.

“What kept you so long?” Frodo asked.

Merry walked up to Frodo, giving him a hug. “I`m sorry Frodo, but there were things to talk about. Now, how did your game go? Did you best the Baggins, Pip?” Merry had transferred his hug to Pippin by now.

“Merry! No one beats a Baggins at chess. You know that.” Bilbo said.

“I equalled him though.” Pippin said.

Walking towards the House, Bilbo drew Merry aside. He had not overcome his amazement over the fact that Merry actually had spied on him, snuck into his study and read his … diary! “I must say, Meriadoc, that you`re quite the cheeky one. I`m not sure if I ought to be angry with you for this or grateful for all you`ve just told me.”

“I`m sorry Bilbo, if I sound like thief roaming your house, but I must admit I was beside myself with curiosity, and I never meant any harm.”

“I know you didn`t Merry, you never do. And besides, it was probably for the best, when we look back on it now, don`t you think? I am glad you found a way to find information on your own.”

“Yes. That might be. At least it was a help in helping Frodo here.”

“At any rate, I am glad you did what you did now. And I`m all the more grateful that I have my Frodo here – that I have all of you lads here. The path before him is perilous but you`re going with him and I think that is for the best, everything considered. I wish there was more I could do.”

“You`ve done your part, Bilbo. You gave the Ring to Frodo, and he must do what he can now. All we can do is hope.”

THE END