This story was originally written for Marigold's Challenge # 28.  Besides at least one nekkid hobbit, my elements that had to be included are a letter or parcel from far away and any sort of collection.

DISCLAIMER: The characters all belong to the amazing world of Middle-earth created by the genius of J.R.R. Tolkien. I just borrowed them for a little while.

A/N: Thanks as always to Dreamflower and Marigold for beta-reading this story.

THE LETTER

6 Thrimidge, S.R. 1419

It was late afternoon when Frodo, Merry, and Sam returned to the guesthouse that had been arranged for the hobbits during their stay in Minas Tirith after their return from the Field of Cormallen.

"Ah, Pippin! You are off duty then. Good!" exclaimed Merry. "You’re in time for afternoon tea."

Pippin was seated at the oak desk by a window of the sitting room angrily crumpling up a piece of paper and growling under his breath. From the set of Pippin’s shoulders and the looks of the desk and floor near where he sat, Frodo knew it was not the first piece of paper to receive Pippin’s wrath. Frodo frowned and raised his hand to still Merry.

"I do not think Pippin has just returned from duty, Merry.” said Frodo. “What is it, Pip?" His eyes were trained on his youngest cousin as he looked at him with concern.

Pippin turned to look at them, running one hand through his chestnut curls. He paused a moment and opened his mouth as if to speak before raising both his hands up, motioning helplessly about him at the crumpled papers, and sighing heavily.

"I don’t know what to say!" Pippin exclaimed in frustration.

Merry raised one eyebrow at his younger cousin. "Would you care to elaborate, Pip? You don’t know what to say about what?"

"What is it you are trying to write, Mr. Pippin?" asked Sam.

"A letter to my parents! I have not written to them since we left Bag End and I thought that now that we are all on the mend, I could write to them and at least let them know that we are all alive," Pippin explained.

"That’s a right fine idea, Mr. Pippin!" said Sam cheerily. "I ought to be writing home to my folks, too!"

Frodo and Merry exchanged glances and grinned.

“I should write to Mum and Da, too. No doubt they are worried sick,” added Merry.

"It is an excellent idea, Pippin." Frodo commented, sadly. "I think we should all write home now that we are able. I’m sure Fatty would like to know what befell us after our departure." A faraway look came into Frodo’s eyes as he thought of his two younger cousins and the danger they had faced because of him. Perhaps a word to Paladin and to Uncle Saradoc would not be amiss either. Ever since they had left Crickhollow, Frodo had wanted to apologise to his cousins for allowing their only sons to go with him.

Merry knew that tone in Frodo’s voice and distant expression in his eyes and did not like it one bit. He turned his steely grey eyes on his older cousin and glared at him accusatorily.

If Merry knew Frodo well, then Pippin knew Merry even better. Instead of glancing at Merry, whose jaw Pippin knew without looking was squared with mounting anger, Pippin stared up at Frodo and read the distant appearance in his sad blue eyes. Pippin felt his own anger rising toward his oldest cousin.

“I thought we had this all settled before we ever left the Shire,” Merry began through gritted teeth, his hands set firmly on his hips. “You have nothing to apologise for. There is nothing you could have done to stop Pippin or me from going with you and it would have been silly of you to even try. The best way you had to protect us was to take us with you, otherwise we would have followed you and surely been in more danger.”

“For someone who is supposed to be such a bright hobbit, you certainly are behaving like an ass,” Pippin scowled.

Frodo looked from one cousin to the other. One thing Merry and Pippin had in common was their determination.

“No, I don’t suppose I could have stopped you at that,” said Frodo with resignation. Merry was the most stubborn Brandybuck Frodo had ever encountered and though Pippin had not a drop of Brandybuck blood in him, he gave a pretty fair imitation of Brandybuck stubbornness once he got an idea stuck in his head. “Just the same, I’d still feel better if I wrote those letters to your folks.”

Pippin sighed again as he looked at the crumpled wad in his hand. "Well, I hope you have more luck than I am having, Frodo, because I am getting nowhere!"

"Pippin! At your age, I am sure you are capable of writing to your parents!" exclaimed Merry. "You can’t tell me that you could best a troll but not a letter to Uncle Paladin and Aunt Eglantine!"

Pippin rolled his eyes at Merry in exasperation.

"Merry, I cannot just write ‘Sorry we left with no warning or explanation and have not written, but Frodo was in mortal peril and so we had to flee without saying a word. We hadn’t got far before a rather grumpy old tree in the Old Forest swallowed up Merry and me. Once the tree spat us back out, we were almost killed by a barrow-wright, but we got free of it and have been chased by a bunch of Black Riders who turned out to be Ringwraiths the entire time we’ve been gone. Frodo was stabbed within an inch of his life because he had this horribly evil ring that the Ringwraiths desperately wanted but that we had to destroy because nobody else in all of Middle-earth would and if we didn’t destroy it then the Shire and all of Middle-earth would have been worse than destroyed."

While Pippin paused and took a deep breath, Frodo, Merry, and Sam glanced at each other. Years of experience had taught them that it was fruitless to try to get a word in until after Pippin had said all that was on his mind.

"Oh,” Pippin continued, “We saw Bilbo and a bunch of Elves and became part of a Company along with Gandalf, an Elf, a Dwarf, and two Men,” continued Pippin. “We didn’t almost die again until we were on an extremely high mountain and were caught in a horrible blizzard that was so cold we almost froze to death so after being attacked by Wolves, we had to make our way to some hidden tunnels where a horrible many-tentacled creature at the entrance tried to eat us, but we stopped it by running into the tunnel before the creature made the entrance collapse, trapping us inside, where, after I tossed a stone I had no business tossing, goblins, a cave troll, and a foul beast from the depths of Middle-earth tried to kill us and threw Gandalf down an abyss, but there’s no need to worry about Gandalf since, incredibly for anyone but Gandalf, he came back to life."

Pippin took another breath. "Let’s see, what else?" He began ticking items off on his fingers as he continued his litany, his voice growing ever louder.

"We rather lost track of time for a month in a mystical land outside regular time before being chased by some orcs who killed one of our Company and took Merry and me prisoners about the same time Frodo and Sam left the rest of our party to go to Mordor to destroy that ring on their own, but they didn’t kill us, the orcs, I mean, not Frodo and Sam, only tied us up and tortured us until we got free and met a big, giant talking treeherder who helped us overcome an evil wizard, which is when I did something so Tookishly foolish as to look into a Palantir and had a seriously dark and powerful lord force his mind upon me and torture my mind so that what was left of our Company was forced to get me away from there with all haste and that’s how I came into the service of a once great and noble lord who had become so demented that he tried to burn his own son alive, but only managed to burn himself to death in front of my eyes and when that was over, I helped watch over Merry who was grievously wounded while stabbing a powerful Witch-King, the one from the old wars when the Tooks sent the archers that never came back … did I mention that poor Merry was left all alone in a kingdom of horse-lords? Anyway, Merry would have died if a Ranger who turned out to secretly be a king hadn’t saved him, but I couldn’t stay with him while he recovered because I had to represent the entire Shire and go to battle against the dark lord at the gates of Mordor itself where I killed a huge troll which fell on top of me and came so close to suffocating me that I thought that I was dead, but the king who saved Merry also tended to my injuries and saved my life when he wasn’t busy saving Frodo and Sam who managed to throw that ring in the fiery river of Mount Doom and save the Shire and all of Middle-earth after all. Frodo lost a finger. Oh, and by the way, you remember the phrase ‘until the king comes back?’ Well, you can forget about saying it anymore!"

Frodo’s eyes were glazed over, as were Merry’s and Sam’s as they stared at Pippin in amazement.

"I couldn’t say all of that to Mother and Father in a letter!" Pippin took another deep breath. "It would give them such a fright, especially to know that their still tweenaged son went through all of that!"

"I see what you mean, Pip," agreed Merry finally. "I couldn’t say that in a letter to my folks either."

Sam shook his head, imagining Marigold or Rosie reading such a letter to his Gaffer. His old dad would think he had gone completely daft.

Frodo put a sympathetic arm about his youngest cousin. "No, I don’t suppose any of us could say that in a letter. Perhaps a simple letter to let them know you were sorry you couldn’t write before and that although we were injured, we are all well on the road to recovery now and quite safe. And that we will be back in the Shire as soon as we are able, though we know not when that will be."

Pippin gave Frodo a weak smile and nodded.

It wasn’t until well after dinner and several crumpled pieces of paper later that Pippin was finally satisfied with his letter.

"I suppose that will have to do for now."

*******************************************

28 Wedmath, S.R. 1419

Paladin was soaking in the tub, readying himself for the start of another day, when he heard the muffled sounds of his wife crying out his name loudly as she ran down the corridor.

"Paladin! Paladin!" Eglantine dashed into the bathing room and quickly closed the door behind her. Her cheeks were all flushed with excitement as she tried to catch her breath.

"What is it? Have the Ruffians got into Tookland again?" Paladin’s heart was racing wildly in fear of what would happen to the Shire if that were the case. All colour drained from his face. He immediately began to rise from the tub and reach for a towel, but was halted by Eglantine.

"Stay yourself, Paladin!" Eglantine managed through the tears she allowed to flow freely down her cheeks. "It’s nothing like that!"

"Then what is it, dear?" asked Paladin, limply easing himself back into the tub with Eglantine’s guidance.

Eglantine’s eyes were twinkling merrily as she grinned widely and shoved a piece of paper in front of him. "It’s Pippin! He’s alive! Our Peregrin is alive! All four of them are! Folco Boffin managed to get these through to us during the night! He’s having a spot of first breakfast now. Folco had met up with a messenger from Bree who had a whole collection of letters from the lads, including letters for us from Pippin, Merry, and Frodo. Folco said that since Freddy was in the Lockholes, he had taken it on himself to try and slip through to deliver the letters to Saradoc and Esme and to us since the Ruffians have stopped the post and Tookland is sealed off. Paladin, the lads! They’re all safe!"

“What? Bless me!" Paladin grabbed the piece of paper from her and read it under his breath.

6 Thrimidge, S.R. 1419

Dear Mother and Father,

I am sorry that we all left without any word of explanation and without bidding you farewell, but it was necessary, for Frodo was in grave danger and had to leave the Shire in total secrecy at once and Sam, Merry, and I were not about to let him go without us there to protect him.

However, I want to assure you that all four of us are alive and safe now in the White City of Minas Tirith, in the realm of Gondor. There was a great evil in the land that had to be destroyed. Though we were injured, we are all healed now and doing much better. Be at ease though, Mother and Father, for the Enemy has been destroyed and all is well now thanks to Frodo.

“Injured! ” Paladin exclaimed. “Our lad was injured?”

“Aye, I was none too pleased to read that either. But he says they are all healed now,” replied Eglantine.

“Hmm… it is what he is not saying that concerns me.”

Eglantine nodded. “Keep reading,” she whispered.

I wish I could tell you the tale of our journey since we left Bag End, but it is best that some things be explained in person. You must trust to our judgment on this, for Frodo, Merry, Sam, and I discussed the matter and we are all of us agreed. Ink upon paper will not suffice.

I have missed both of you as well as my sisters so very much since we left. There have been so many times that I have wanted to write you and at least let you know that we were safe, but had neither the time to do so nor any way to send such a message. And even if I did, I still could not, lest we endanger Frodo and his mission. Mother and Father, it nearly broke my heart knowing what this must have been doing to you, but it had to be so. Although I am indeed a fool of a Took, as Gandalf is wont to say, I assure you that this was no lark or fool adventure that we undertook.

Father, I do not understand how so many Tooks could have enjoyed leaving the Shire on adventures. Although we have seen a great many things while we have been away, the one constant all of us longed for more than anything was to be back home, safe in the Shire. Our love for our families and the Shire is what made all of these months among evil bearable. Many was the time I dreamt of all of you back home in the Great Smials and been fortified to know that you were all safe and sound and that the Shire was unscathed.

Paladin lowered the letter and glanced at Eglantine, careful not to put it in the bath in which he was still soaking. The water had long ago grown cold, but he gave it no heed as he shared a worried look with his wife.

"The lads don’t know about the Ruffians," Eglantine whispered, her eyes round with concern.

Paladin lifted the letter again and continued reading.

Merry and Sam are also writing to their parents and Frodo says he is writing to Fatty Bolger, but I expect you will want to share the news that we are safe with them just the same. It is all right to tell them now as the need for secrecy has passed.

We will all be returning as soon as possible, though we know not yet when that might be, but we hope it will be soon. The days cannot fly swiftly enough until I see you again.

Please give my love to my sisters and to Uncle Saradoc and Aunt Esme as well.

Your loving but errant son,

Pippin

Paladin brushed tears from his eyes and opened his mouth to speak, but found no words. He looked at the letter in his hands again and the two letters Eglantine was still holding as if to make sure it was really true. 6 Thrimidge, S.R. 1419. He thought for a moment; it had taken Pippin’s letter almost four months to reach them. Gondor… he had listened to Bilbo’s stories and legends ever since he was a lad … where did Bilbo say Gondor was? It was far away … down south, if he recalled correctly. Pippin had gone all the way down there? And Merry and Frodo, too, along with Sam Gamgee? It was no wonder their letters took so long to reach the Shire! Peregrin truly was well named after all.

Four months ago. Had the danger truly passed? How could it with so much trouble right here in the Shire? What if things were worse here than what Pippin had encountered? Or if there were more danger on their way home? Paladin didn’t think he could bear it to know that his son had survived so long amongst the dangers of the world only to lose him on his way home.

But Pippin had said that the danger was gone and that they were all safe and looking forward to returning to the Shire.

Despite Pippin’s having said in his letter that they did not know when they would be returning, Paladin found it impossible not to get his hopes up. Somehow, he knew that they would all come back to the Shire safely.

When at last Paladin found his voice, he was so choked up with joy that Eglantine could barely hear him. "Home. Our lad is coming home."