Title: Darkness on a Bright Morning

Rating: PG (just to be safe I guess)

Thank you to Budgielover for beta-ing for me and suggesting such wonderful things!

Written for Marigold’s Challenge 14 write a story where at least part of it takes place in a designated place. For this one it is a pasture full of sheep.

Merry lay back on the soft grass eyes closed against the midday sun. He breathed in deeply the smells of new grass and new life. The grass cushioned him and the soft ground seemed to mold itself beneath him into a comfortable bed. The only sound was that of the sheep bleating, calling to a young one or just in what seemed pleasant conversation. Merry let out a breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding. It was a pity that spring was tainted with so many evil memories.

Merry had slipped out of Crickhollow soon after breakfast. Pippin hadn’t asked any questions, just let him go. For which he was grateful. It was soon to be a year since they had moved into the little house, and it was the first time they had spent the anniversaries together.

Life had been comfortable at Crickhollow; the two cousins had been able to live easily without concerned relatives hovering in every corner. Merry had no worries about putting Pippin out and Pippin would come to him if he were having problems. Hard nights were spent in each other’s company and if either was melancholy about a recent memory or remembered date, they were able to let it dissipate without answering questions. They understood one another without explaining and life had been pleasant. Merry knew the anniversaries would be bad but he hadn’t expected them to get as out of hand as they had.

Merry pushed against the soft lamb that nibbled on his curls and she moved on to find more satisfying grass. Pippin had woken nearly ten nights ago screaming about a message to Saruman and he wasn’t consolable until the early morning when he finally emerged from the dark dreams. Pippin’s hands had then looked burned for the next couple of days. A frightening reminded of what had happened. And then there was last night. He had been lucky enough to be camping between Buckland and Budgeford and only caused a minor upset when he arrived a day later than expected, last year.

This time he had been home, just he and Pippin. That was why he had left rather early … he couldn’t stand looking at his cousin. Caught in a torrent of dark dreams and memories Merry had lashed out, and Pippin had caught it. Now a brilliantly colored bruise discolored Pippin’s right eye. Pip had been trying to sooth the dreams as he so often did. But the dreams had been stronger last night and Merry had harmed his dear little cousin, closer than brother, a fact he was very much ashamed of.

Merry dozed lightly off and on with nothing but the wind’s lullaby and the sheep’s singing to ease him. He had not brought any food and it was approaching mid afternoon when he began to think to go in search of a meal. But he lay still when he felt, rather than heard, the soft foot falls. He could hear them shuffle around and then stop, just a few feet away. He didn’t need to open his eyes to know Pippin was now beside him.

Merry hoped in vain that Pippin would think him asleep and leave. Such hopes were useless, Merry realized, when Pippin took a seat next to him. “I thought perhaps I’d find you here,” said Pippin quietly. “It’s a nice place to be to see the new life and wonders of this world.”

Merry did not say anything but kept his eyes closed. Though he did squeeze them tighter against the tears that suddenly pricked his eyelids.

Pippin laughed softly. “Did you know on my way over here, I saw a couple of small lads playing? Well, I did. They were running about on the banks of the Brandywine.” Pippin stopped and Merry could feel his eyes on him. “Children don’t pay much heed to the fears many adults have of the river. The older yelled for the younger to stop. But he wasn’t paying much mind to him and tripped over a bit of a ledge. He fell into the river, stole my breath away for a moment. But the older, you know, he jumped in as swift as could be and hauled the younger out. He scolded the younger one and marched him back home.” Pippin’s voice was soft and Merry was not startled when his cousin laid his hand on his arm.

Merry remained still not yet opening his eyes, but listening intently to Pippin’s soft lilting voice. So mature and wise for all he wasn’t even considered an adult yet. Merry could picture his cousin years ago when they when they were young and all that mattered was their parents didn’t find out about their latest scrape. He ignored the lamb that licked his face.

“Those lad are best friends, and there isn’t much that will separate them,” said Pippin. “I hope they fight, and I hope that they make up. I hope they see hard times for I know they will be able to overcome them. Love will allow them to overcome anything.”

Finally Merry opened his eyes and gazed solemnly into Pippin’s green ones. One now ringed in dark blue and purple. “Pippin, I don’t doubt your ability to forgive and love to conquer.”

Pippin smiled sadly. “No, I think it is your own love you are doubting. You are afraid your love can’t pull you through and allow you to forgive yourself. Merry, I don’t mind that you hit me. You didn’t mean to. Yes, it hurt but only for a moment. I of all people know what it’s like to be trapped in nightmares, unable to wake.”

Merry sat up and pushed the persistent lamb back from his chest and shook his head. “Pippin, I hurt you and you couldn’t stop it and you are the only one who could hope to be strong enough to stop me. What if, what if I hurt Estella? We will be married in a little over a year! She can’t hope to soothe such a fit.”

Pippin sighed. “I don’t know, Merry. Maybe you will have to come stay with me a couple of weeks out of the year. Maybe the dreams will lessen. Mayhap we should just deal with that problem as it comes along.”

Merry bent his head and tried to keep the tears from falling, but when Pippin reached over to squeeze his shoulder he couldn’t help it. His throat tightened and the dam burst allowing the tears to fall in quick succession.

Pippin snuggled closer, seeking comfort as way of comforting. He also pushed a baby lamb into Merry’s lap, and the tears soon subsided. Merry stroked the perfect little creature as it latched onto his finger trying to nurse. Merry lay his head against Pippin’s sighing softly

“You can’t stop things from happening,” said Pippin. “No one can. All we can do is deal with it as it comes along. But there is always the chance of a brighter tomorrow, as long as the sun rises, there is hope. I know you’ve already spoken to Estella about what happened on the Quest and that she understands your fears and nightmares. I also know that her love is strong, perhaps the strongest you will ever have to guide you through. We’ll make it, all right?”

Merry continued to stroke the lamb as it settled contentedly in his lap. He looked up at Pippin once more, noticing his eyes were damp as well. “I know, and I’ll always have you to help me through. With you and Estella, there’s not much more I can hope for to pull me through, is there?”

Pippin smiled. “Well then, if that’s all settled, let’s go home. I’m starving!” Pippin stood up and offered Merry his hand.

“Always thinking of your stomach,” Merry’s own stomach rumbled rather loudly as he put the lamb down on the grass encouraging it to go in search of its mother.

“And you’re neglecting yours!” cried Pippin, pulling Merry to his feet. “No need to go without decent meals when we’re in civilized places!”

Merry laughed and draped an arm around Pippin’s shoulders. If anything could get him through the nightmares, it would be love and laughter, and he knew he could always find plenty of both at home, in the Shire