Title: “Farewell”

Author: Fan81981

Disclaimer: All recognisable LOTR characters belong to the Tolkien Foundation. All unrecognisable characters are probably my fault so you may blame me. Unfortunately I am not making any money off this.

Rating: G

Summary: There are goodbyes and then there are farewells. This is not much of a plot or a summary but I guess it is how Celeborn said farewell to Galadriel. Set at the end of the Third Age.

I know Celeborn was not mentioned in the party of Elves but I figures he was there. If he was not then please excuse me.

For the purpose of this fic: // … // denotes telepathy. I didn’t know a better word to describe the mind-to-mind speak that elves indulge in.

*~ …~* denotes thought. It is like the deeper layer of thought that elves cannot easily sense, unlike the telepathy thoughts. Though, if the emotion behind a thought is strong enough even these thoughts may be sensed them is strong enough.

This ficlet is dedicated to Nilmandra – it started off as something I cobbled together in frustration. Whatever it has ended up as is her fault – er to her credit. ;) Any mistakes are mine, any praise is hers.

I like opinions – I think I finally hit the right tone with this one. *fingers crossed*

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Elves were strange – though beautiful creatures – Master Samwise Gamgee decided. He did not think he would ever understand them, not that he had much time left to do so. Soon most of the elves would be gone - gone to some fabled land where sorrow did not exist – and they were taking his Mr. Frodo with them.

As he stood on the shores of the Grey Havens, watching Mr. Frodo say goodbye to his cousins, Sam thought that it was a good thing after all that he did not understand these ethereal creatures. What thoughts hid behind those placid faces? What sorrows did those sweet smiles hide? Sam decided that it was best he did not know – after all, the thoughts of immortals were far beyond those of mere mortals – especially simple gardeners such as himself.

There stood the Lady Galadriel, so beautiful, so fair and so confusing. Sam was not sure whether she was happy to be leaving or not. It was said that she was returning home, to the Undying Lands, to the place where she had been born. Home was a good place to be, Sam agreed with that – but why had she stayed away so long. He was not sure how long she had been away but it seemed like a long time, too long for the Hobbit.

It sounded so very impressive – the Undying Lands, where all the beautiful elves lived in eternal joy with the mighty Valar. But why was she not more excited?   She stood in the shadow of the great white ship, standing there silently next to Lord Celeborn, her face carefully blank. Her grace and brilliance still rendered him speechless. But even the Hobbit knew that her calm façade was just that – a mask that covered a multitude of different emotions. Maybe she would miss her husband, Sam knew that if it was him, he would be terribly unhappy to be leaving Rose. At least, they did not have children like him and Rosie did – or maybe they did? Sam could not remember – maybe their children were all grown up and did not need their parents – a strange concept to the Gardener, but then Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn were not Hobbits.

Sam frowned, why did she not speak to him? Why did he not go with her? Would he not miss her? Sam doubted that – even elves were not that different. Maybe they had nothing to say to each other – after all they were old, they must have already said what they needed to. Sam was not a Hobbit of many words and could well understand the inadequacy of words. It was best to remain silent when you had nothing good to say. Still, Sam could not help but wonder.

Lady Galadriel, going home but leaving her husband behind. Was she as unhappy as Sam to be losing a loved one? Was her joy at the prospect of finally finding peace mingled with bitterness, as Mr. Frodo’s was? Sam shrugged, who could hope to understand what elves thought?

As Sam watched, he saw Lord Celeborn lean closer to his Lady. Sam shook his head, here he was wondering about people’s private thoughts while he was standing there gawking at them. The Gaffer would have been ashamed at Sam’s rudeness. The little
Hobbit quickly turned away. The elves were welcome to their thoughts – and their privacy.

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// The little gardener watches us, my Lord. //

// The Hobbit watches you, my Lady. Not that I can blame him. As always, you are a light in my world. I am pleased that my last glimpse of you will be one of such beauty. //

// I am pleased that you approve of my appearance, my Lord. I took great care for you today. //

Celeborn glanced at his wife, looking deep into her blue eyes. He did not have to touch her physically to caress her. Even standing by her side, his mind lightly touched hers – gentle thoughts stroking her much like the gentle fingers of a long-time lover.

// You do not touch me, my Lord. Why? //

// I am always touching you, my lady. I do not have to be in contact to do that. //

// Even so, why do you not do what you desire? As always, I would welcome your kiss. //

// I would not scandalise our little gardener. He watches you with such awe. It would not do for him to see you give in to such a common display of emotions. //

Galadriel laughed deep inside Celeborn’s mind, filling his senses with the rich sound. It still overwhelmed him, the sheer perfection of her voice. Perhaps it was the rarity of the sound which made it so precious or maybe it was the love that accompanied it. Or perhaps it was that Celeborn adored anything and everything about his Lady.

// Are you sure you would not like to make the Hobbit blush? // Galadriel moved closer to Celeborn, her arm gently touching his.

Celeborn did not allow his body to shudder at that little contact but he could not stop his wife from reading the extent of emotions running through his mind. He could feel her smile, a little smugly. She knew perfectly well the affect she had on him.

// Perhaps I would, my wife. It would be good for him, do you not think so? // Galadriel nodded, moving a little closer. Though it was not obvious, her breathing became a little faster as Celeborn leaned in towards her. Even after all their years together, those grey eyes could still hold her spellbound.

// Then again, it might not be. // Celeborn straightened, ignoring the flash of regret in his wife’s eyes. He knew perfectly well how he effected her.

// Come walk with me, my Lord. Maybe we can find a more private location where you will not be worried about the sensibilities of onlookers. //

// As my Lady wishes. // Celeborn clasped the delicate white hand in his own, strong fingers closing over their equally strong counterparts. Such strength in those hands, such deceptive fragility. How he loved those hands, even when one of them wore the reason for his sorrow – Nenya.

“Come with me, my Lord.”

Celeborn looked up when he heard that beloved voice, // Such impatience. //  “We had better find that spot you wished for, my Lady. We would not want to delay Círdan more than necessary.”

Galadriel let Celeborn avoid the deeper meaning of her request. There was not much she would refuse him. There was not much that she was capable of denying him. Whatever he wished, whenever he wished, she would do for him.

// And I for you, my Love. //

// Naturally.   //

Celeborn smiled as he led Galadriel away from the ship where most of the Elves were gathered. His eyes scanned the area, looking for some secluded spot where he could properly bid his wife farewell. He did not want others to witness his final few moments with her – they were his, only his. For once, he would not share his wife. There would be time enough for others, now belonged to him – it was the precious, the little time left to bid her goodbye.

//This is not goodbye, beloved. This is just another parting which we will bear as we have borne all others. //

// Will we, love?//

Galadriel did not like the doubt in Celeborn’s voice. It did not suit him and it hurt her. // Do you doubt it? You have overcome greater adversity before. //

// I have grown used to having you by my side. I know not what I will do when you are not with me – when the Sea parts our minds as it does our bodies. // And therein lay the problem, unlike before Celeborn knew this parting to be more final – more pervasive. Before he had always had her thoughts with him to warm him, to hold him when he was weary. Now he would lose even that comfort.

// Our feä will always be bound, dear heart. Nothing can change that. // Galadriel stopped walking and turned to face her chosen mate. Her hand came up to cradle his familiar face, allowing him the rest he would deny himself.

// I will miss this, my Lady. // Celeborn smiled at his lover, his partner - his wife. // I will miss you, more than you can imagine. //

Galadriel swallowed – this was her fault. Her fault that Celeborn hurt. His pain was the price she had to pay for doing her duty – for protecting her people. When she had chosen to put on Nenya and fight the Shadow, she had known that one day a reckoning would come. It was not possible to deplete herself as she had done, without becoming world-weary and dispirited. For all of that she had been prepared and even had a solution for – Valinor. But in the midst of all that calculation she had forgotten that she would have to lose a lot more than herself – she would have to lose Celeborn.

 Sometimes the price for valour seemed too high to her.

// Regret my love, does not suit you. //

// It is not regret – it is anger. I do not want to leave you. //

// You knew this day would come. Even if you consciously denied it, you knew that this was the price you would have to pay. //

Galadriel nodded but her thoughts were tinged with melancholy. // I just wish beloved, that you did not have to pay alongside with me. //

// I too made a choice when I decided to love you. I decided that whatever price I had to pay to be with you was worth it. You were worth it – you are worth it. // Celeborn gathered his wife in his arms, not caring if people could see them. Some things were even more important than privacy.

// I knew I chose well when I chose you, my Lord. //

Celeborn chuckled, // So proud, my beautiful love. Still you are so enamoured of victory. //

// I won you, my Lord. After that, victory became a habit. //

Celeborn tipped Galadriel’s face up so that he could look at her fully, tracing the shape of her face with his eyes and fingers - the strong bones, the stubborn mouth and the ever-defiant set of her jaw. All Celeborn knew like a well-loved poem – and poetry she was, his Lady of Light. His fingers rubbed her smooth skin, memorising the feel of it for the long years ahead. He knew that he would remember this moment for the rest of his immortal life   – the way her eyes glowed, the way her lips invited his touch – the way everything about her loved him.

The way her brow arched in a silent, but pert question. // Will you deny me for much longer, my Lord? //

Celeborn did not bother replying to the question. He bent his head forward, mouth gently   seeking hers. Her lips parted, inviting him to deepen the kiss – challenging him to do so.

// You will not ask me to stay, will you? //

// No, I will not, my Lady. You feä needs the rest of Valinor. I can feel its need in my own heart. I love you too much to ask you to stay. //

// I would stay for you, Celeborn. No matter what, I would stay for you. //

// Which is why I will not ask you to. I love you enough to let you go. //

// And if I wish to stay? Here?… With you? //

// Then I would tell you to leave. I cannot see you in more pain. I have spent an Age watching Nenya drain you.   I cannot do that anymore. Please do not ask me to. //

Galadriel wound her arms around Celeborn’s neck, mouth never leaving his. Her hands curled in his silver hair, holding him to her as if she would lose him.

// While I understand why you must stay, I cannot help but wish that you were coming with me. It will be hard to do this without you. Through long years of solitude, I despaired ever finding someone to love as I love you. You were a revelation to me – silver elf of mine. //

// My people need me. // Celeborn’s thoughts were full of the sorrow he kept from his words. Either way, he lost something – his wife or himself.

//I know, dear heart. I know. I can understand why they would want you here – you are difficult to do without. And then – there are the grandchildren.//

Celeborn smiled at the thought of his children – their children. // They will miss you. //

// Then it is – good, that you are here. You will love them enough for both of us. //

Celeborn ignored the way Galadriel’s thoughts caught on the word ‘good’, he could feel her pain, her sorrow at this parting. He did not need to be told how deep the grief ran, the same emotions throbbed inside him as well. He laid his head on top of hers, not saying anything – letting the love he felt for her wash through him and into her.

 *~ I need you with me, Celeborn. Nothing is complete without you, fey elf of mine. You have changed me – do not expect me to change back without you. ~*

// I am sorry, my Galadriel, my Light. I have to stay here – with my people. They need me, our grandchildren need me. //

// You were not meant to hear that. //

// I know, but you should have learnt not to underestimate me. //

// And I am called proud! //

Galadriel shook her head before resting it on Celeborn’s chest, listening to the beat of his heart. They had discussed this before and he had explained the reasons behind his decision. She understood and even admired his dedication. She loved him all the more because he was Celeborn the Wise – he had never shirked those in need, and never would. How could she blame him for something she fell in love with in the first place?

Of course, none of this made it any easier.

Galadriel followed the vein in Celeborn’s neck to the base of his neck – where she could feel the pulse beneath her fingers. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, lips brushing against that life pulse. As she felt his arms enfold her she thanked all the powers that had watched over her for giving her Celeborn. For that alone, she would be forever in their debt.

Somewhere in the background they could hear Círdan’s voice calling Galadriel. It was time to leave – the ship would sail soon. Celeborn’s arms tightened around it wife, holding her close one last time.

// Promise me, my Lord that you will come back to me. //

// My Love … I …// Celeborn held her even closer to him, knowing that he really did not want to refuse her. He could not, she held too much of his heart for him to be truly happy without her.

// Promise me that you will return to me – leave me that hope again. When you tire of this land, and the children do not need you any longer then bring your people with you – to me. We will make a new home, where we will never be parted. //

// That is a nice dream, my Lady. And if I never tire of this land? //

// Then remember that there is one in Aman who loves you desperately. If, for nothing else than pity’s sake, remember her. Remember that she aches for you. Return to her.   I do not ask you to come now – but eventually? // Galadriel smiled for Celeborn, telling him without words, that whatever he did, it would be right – she had faith in him. She loved him – and if need be she would love him alone.  

// Eventually. // Celeborn agreed, allowing his heart to make the decision for him. If and when he needed her he would not deny himself or her that comfort. Why should he not be with her if that is what he so wished? When Lord Celeborn was no longer needed, he would return to her, when the ties that bound him to Middle Earth weakened he would come - when Celeborn was finally free to do as he wished, he would be with her.

Galadriel looked up at Celeborn, eyes blazing. With raw power in her voice she demanded, “Do you so swear, my Lord?”

“So I vow, my wife. I will return to you.”

// Then I am content. I will wait for you. Do not make me wait for long. // Galadriel rested comfortably in Celeborn’s arms – he would not fade. Someday, no matter how long it would take, he would be in her arms again. Till then she would endure – till then she would hope.

// I would not dare. One does not cross the Lady of Light. //

// Unless one is Celeborn the Wise. I love you. //

Celeborn bent down and kissed her again – one last time.

// No! Till the next time. // Galadriel pulled him closer.

// Till the next time. // Celeborn had to agree with her, he would not have been able to let her go otherwise.

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As the White Ship sailed out of the harbour, Galadriel watched Celeborn until the Havens faded from sight. Even though she was returning home, even though she was returning to all that she had once given up – she could feel a part of her break. It was then she knew that she would find peace in Valinor but she would never be complete until he returned to her. Celeborn – her love, her mate – her home.

// You promised me, my Lord. Return to me. //

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Celeborn watched as his wife sailed away, leaving behind Middle Earth, pain, strife – and him. He wanted to be happy for her, she was going back to her people, to the place that was her home as Arda could never be. But all he felt was this emptiness where Galadriel once was. How he loved her, and how inadequate those words sounded, even to him. He was bound to her in ways no other creature could understand – forever bound until she had become a part of him. So intrinsically bound that he could feel himself being torn apart as she sailed away.

// Wait for me, my Lady. I will come back to you. //

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Sam waved one last time to Mr. Frodo, sad to watch his friend leave these shores – never to return. Things would never be the same again. As he turned to return to the waiting Merry and Pippin, his eyes fell on the silent elven Lord.

He swallowed, unable to breath. There was such pain on the elf’s face – pain that no creature should have to suffer. Sam cautiously approached the elf, for Celeborn still frightened him, the age in those eyes was not easy to bear. “Your lordship?”

Celeborn looked down at the small Hobbit, face carefully blank. Sam wondered if he had imagined the hurt on the Eldar’s face. “Yes, Master Gamgee?”

“I … I was just wondering if you were all right?”

Celeborn raised an eyebrow at the Hobbit, causing Sam to stutter, “Meaning no disrespect, sir. But I was wondering if I could do anything for you?”

Celeborn smiled, “Be happy, little one. This world needs that. Be happy for those who cannot.”

*~ Is that an answer to my question? ~*

That stray thought made Celeborn laugh, which only further puzzled Sam. Had he said something to make the elf-lord laugh? What had he said? Sam quickly went through the conversation but could not find anything vaguely amusing in it. Was the elf-lord laughing at him?

“Even I would not dare such a thing, brave Hobbit. Be well, little one. And be happy.” With that Celeborn bowed and was off, leaving behind a very confused Samwise.

Yes, elves were strange creatures.

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