A/N: Written for Lily as a holiday request ficlet.

Bedbugs

Frodo shut his eyes tightly as Pippin's shrieks and squeals grew louder. After a day of running after his young cousin and trying to think of new and interesting ways to keep him occupied, Frodo was exhausted and wanted only to sleep. But before he could do that, he needed to get Pippin settled for the night, and his cousin simply refused to cooperate.

"Pippin," he called once, but his cousin ignored him as he continued to jump on the bed, laughing gleefully. Frodo's head throbbed more with every loud, creaking bounce and he thought quickly. He needed something to distract his cousin.

"Pippin!" Frodo said again, raising his voice in desperation. "You must stop that jumping right now! Have you forgotten about the bedbugs?"

Freezing in mid-jump, Pippin crashed down to the bed with a noisy thump "Bedbugs," he repeated, trying out the word. He eyed his cousin critically. "I've never heard of them before, Frodo. Are they real or something made up?"

"Of course they're real," Frodo replied quickly. "I can't believe that you have never heard of them. Everyone knows about bedbugs."

Pippin wrinkled his nose, obviously trying to remember if anyone had ever told him about bedbugs before, and finally deciding that they had not. "Please tell me about them, Frodo," he said at last. "Are they scary?" he added, glancing warily at his bed.

"It depends on whether you think tiny, slimy bugs with lots of sharp, little teeth are scary," Frodo said, hiding a grin as Pippin's eyes grew wide. "I'd imagine that some little lads might find them interesting."

"And…and they live in beds?" Pippin asked, his voice wavering.

Frodo nodded solemnly. "Most of the time they just sleep, but if they're disturbed by lots of tossing and turning…or jumping…" His voice trailed off, and Frodo shook his head gravely.

Pippin stiffened. "What happens? What do they do?" he whispered.

"They bite," Frodo replied. He knew it was mean of him, but it was just so much fun to tease Pippin, who always seemed to believe everything he said.

Tonight was no exception. Pippin shivered as he looked at his pillows and blankets, rumpled from his vigorous jumping. "Why haven't I ever seen a bedbug?" he asked at last, trying to sound brave and failing miserably.

"They're so small that they are nearly impossible to see, especially in the dark," Frodo replied. "They can be anywhere." The look of sheer disgust on Pippin's face forced Frodo to stifle a laugh with a fake, enormous yawn.

"It's getting late, and I'm very sleepy," Frodo said. He bent down to kiss his cousin on the forehead. "Goodnight. You had better get to sleep before you disturb any other strange creatures."

Pippin shuddered, but nonetheless put on a brave face as he shifted awkwardly. It seemed that he was trying to burrow in his blankets without actually touching them. "Goodnight," he squeaked, squeezing his eyes shut.

"Goodnight," Frodo said with a smile. "Sleep tight, and don't let the bedbugs bite," he added as an afterthought, feeling quite pleased with his rhyming, before he took the candle from the bedside table and fled to his room for a good, long laugh.

Still smirking, Frodo changed into his nightshirt and crawled into bed before blowing out the candle and snuggling deep in the blankets, content.

At least, he would be content if only his arm were not so itchy. And his leg, Frodo thought, scratching absently behind his knee. His scalp felt prickly as well, and Frodo scratched his head before flopping onto his back, trying to get comfortable somehow.

A few moments later, Frodo tiptoed into Pippin's room. His young cousin was sound asleep, a fact Frodo noticed with chagrin as he carefully slipped beneath the blankets.

"Frodo?" Pippin said groggily, opening one bleary, yet immediately mischievous eye. "Did you find a bedbug? I haven't seen any yet."

"Hush up," Frodo grumbled, burrowing close to his cousin, who giggled in the darkness.