Chapter 3. Getting Acquainted

Father and son watched in awe as the newest additions to the family nursed contentedly. Diamond had managed to position them so that both could eat at the same time, much better than listening to one wail while feeding the other, she imagined.

'How do they know to do that?' Faramir whispered. His mother smiled at him, then looked back down at the babes.

'They're made to do that,' Pippin answered softly. 'They're proper hobbits, after all. First thing they did when they came into the world was to sing, the next was to eat...' One of the tiny fists waved briefly. 'And look now, the next thing they're learning is how to dance.'

'And how to love,' Diamond murmured, as one of the babes snuggled close to her and fell asleep.

Pippin gave the lad a nudge. 'Take another blanket and cover your mother,' he said. 'She'll be catching her death...'

Diamond chuckled, 'Besides which it's unseemly for me to be uncovered, even though you've seen about all there is to be seen.' She flushed and dropped her eyes, and the smile left her face.

'I didn't see anything,' Faramir said. 'I was too busy pretending you were a pony.'

Pippin coughed, and Diamond nodded at her partly consumed bottle of brandy. Faramir picked it up and handed it to his father. 'We're going to have to uncork another one soon,' he said.

'Why, did you want some more?' his father said, and chuckled.

'Now, don't you get him started! He'll be as drunk as a Brandybuck before you know it,' Diamond scolded.

'No thank you, I'm warm enough,' Faramir answered, and rose to throw more wood on the fire.

'What could be keeping Ferdibrand?' Diamond fretted. 'It's full dark and he's not back yet.'

'Maybe he got lost,' Pippin said, upending the bottle.

'On a road?'

'O aye, I forgot about that...' the Thain said. 'Well, if this were a story in Frodo's book, he would have got chased by wolves, or caught up with elves who'd feed him but say neither yea nor nay when he asked for help, or carried off by eagles...'

'Or caught by orcs,' Faramir said, in the spirit of things.

His father sobered abruptly, and Diamond said quickly. 'There are no orcs in the Shire, you know that. It's all right, love.'*

'Ummm, he ran into a pack of dwarves needing a burglar and got hauled off on an adventure,' Faramir said hastily.

'That's right,' Diamond chuckled. 'More grist for the mill, Mayor Sam will have to start a whole new book.'

'I'm hungry,' Faramir said suddenly. 'Got any apples in your pockets, Father?'

The Thain smiled. 'Sorry, Son, I'm fresh out,' he said. 'Gave Merry my last one whilst we were waiting for the Ferry.'

'As if he needed it!' Diamond said huffily. When Pippin looked at her in surprise, she went on, 'He's filling out nicely, with all that good cooking and the way Estella shamelessly stuffs him, while you've no meat on your bones!'

'And to think I could have married her,' Pippin sighed. 'Every time Merry opens his mouth to say something, she pops more food in.' He shuddered. 'I could be as wide as Gimli the dwarf by now. Would you still love me if I were twice the hobbit I am?'

'I would still love you if you were half the hobbit you are,' Diamond said fondly.

Pippin closed his eyes. 'That's reassuring,' he sighed.

'What is it, love?' Diamond said, feeling a stab of worry.

He shook his head, but she insisted. Finally meeting her eyes, he said, 'I cannot feel my legs, love. They've been numb for some hours now.'

'Perhaps the coach is pressing down on them, they're just asleep is all,' she said.

He closed his eyes again. 'O aye,' he said. 'Then I can look forward to the pins and needles once we haul the carriage off. Probably enough to supply all the seamstresses and tailors in the Shire.' Opening his eyes, he smiled and said, 'Are you going to keep those little ones all to yourself then? Hand one of them over, at least!' Faramir silently took up one of the babes from his mother and settled it in his father's arms.

Pippin sighed, pushing back the blanket slightly to peer into the tiny face. 'I forget how tiny babes are,' he breathed. 'Look at that! She's got all her parts in place. Have you ever seen such tiny eyelashes?' He brushed the little brow with his lips. 'What'll we call her, then?'

'I was thinking... Forget-me-nots are my favourite flowers, you know,' Diamond said.

'Forget-me-not,' Pippin murmured. 'Such a big name for such a wee lass.'

'What would we call her for short?' Faramir asked.

Pippin gazed deep into Diamond's eyes. 'How about "Ruby",' he said softly, 'After your sister? We'll never forget her, after all.' Diamond smiled, bending over the other twin to hide her tears.

Faramir spoke up to distract his mother. 'And what about my brother? He needs a proper name.'

Diamond laughed through her tears. 'We cannot call him Meriadoc,' she said, renewing an old argument.

'Whyever not?' Pippin retorted.

'It is just not Tookish enough! It is too much of a Brandybuck name,' she laughed.

'Just plain "Merry" then,' he said.

'No, that is not fancy enough to befit a son of the Thain,' she admonished. 'He's not a farmer, after all.'

'He's a farmer's grandson,' The Thain chided.

'Still. He'll be the Thain's brother someday, and needs a proper name!'

'Merianard? Merianald?* How in the world do we make "Merry" sound Tookish?'

'Either of those names will work,' Diamond smiled. 'And we can still call him "Merry".'

'Thank goodness for small mercies!' Pippin muttered fervently.

Diamond smiled down into the small eyes that had opened, staring up at her, unfocused. 'Hello, little Merry,' she said. 'Pleased to make your acquaintance.' The babe began to nuzzle and search. 'How about another drink?' his mother said.

'Sounds like a good idea to me,' his father said. Faramir pulled the cork from another bottle of brandy and handed it to his father.

***

Author's Notes:

*This refers to an episode in "Seeing the Forest for the Trees"

*The story of Diamond's sister Ruby is told in "Jewels"

*While researching for a later story, I realised that these names are all wrong. However, it messes up a nice little bit of humour in a later chapter, to change them, so I left "Merianard", "Merianald" and "Meriabrand" intact... just be assured, fellow nit-pickers, that I realise they do not fit the established order of naming hobbits...