Disclaimer: I don’t own them, and I’ll put them back safely when I’m done.

Author’s Note: Wow, I’m really amazed at the response this fic has gotten. I hope this chapter lives up to your expectations. Enjoy!

Chapter Two: Red Hot Chili Pepper

Pippin sat at the laden breakfast table and worried. Things were far too normal to be good. Aragorn sat at the high table, talking to Lady Arwen and one of the sons of Elrond. He had bidden Pippin a cheery ‘good morning’ when he had walked in, which disconcerted the tweenager mightily. He had expected Strider to be grudging, even angry, but not normal. It was terribly confusing.

Sighing worriedly, Pippin dug into his hotcakes. They were paper-thin and filled with chocolate sauce and some strange fruit called bananas, which Pippin adored. Today, however, he could not properly enjoy the food. It had dawned on him that Strider was a Ranger, and Rangers might fight back. But that was not possible, was it? How could Strider possibly know that Merry and Pippin had put the frog in his bed? He should just put it out of his head and get on with his breakfast.

“Hullo, Pippin.”

The voice in his ear was soft and velvety, and just slightly sinister. Pippin jumped a foot high and yelped. The speaker laughed and sat down beside him; Pippin relaxed greatly when he saw that it was Legolas. The elf helped himself to some of the rich cakes and smiled at him.

“Did I frighten you? I am sorry,” Legolas said.

Pippin shook his head, trying to calm his racing heart. “No, no, no! I’m fine, really. Fine. Perfectly fine.” Aware that he was babbling, Pippin bit down on his lip. On second thought, he shoved a forkful of food in his mouth. If anything would keep him quiet, the chocolaty hotcakes would.

Legolas took his time spreading a thin cake flat and filling it with strawberries and cream. If he had not been so agitated, Pippin would have been interested; he had never seen that mixture on hotcakes before. Still, he could not shake the feeling that Legolas was sitting by him for more reason than camaraderie. His suspicions were confirmed as Legolas set down the bowl of strawberries.

“Did you hear what happened to Aragorn last night? There was a bullfrog in his bed,” Legolas said, his voice light.

“Oh?” squeaked Pippin. Where was Merry, he wondered frantically? He was so much braver when Merry was around! “What happened?”

“Well, nothing,” Legolas replied. “Aragorn changed the sheets and went to his rest. I wonder how the frog got there.”

Pippin shrugged and forced himself to swallow another bite. The hotcakes had turned to stone in his stomach, though. He wondered desperately what Legolas was about.

“I-I really must see to Frodo, Legolas,” he said, abandoning his breakfast and jumping up. “Sam will be needing to come eat himself. Food, I mean, Sam couldn’t possibly eat himself. I mean, I suppose it’s possibly, but I doubt he would actually do it, I mean Sam is so sensible...”

Pippin turned and fled. Legolas stared after him, trying not to choke on his laughter. Amazing, how the lad had gone from giggles to terror in one night. Aragorn just might have something on them. Legolas took a bite of his breakfast and snickered to himself. Perhaps his stay in Rivendell would not be as dull as he had originally thought.

*****

“Legolas knows!” howled Pippin, throwing himself facedown on Merry’s bed. His cousin paused in brushing his hair and stared at him. “I was eating hotcakes and Legolas came up and said good morning all smoothly, like father when he knows we broke into the pantry, and then he told me about the frog! Merry, I’m scared!”

Merry dropped his brush and used a pillow to whack his cousin gently. “Pull yourself together, Pippin! He’s an Elf! Elves do not pull pranks! It’s against their code, or something. So even if he knows, Legolas probably won’t act on it. We have nothing to fear.”

Pippin hugged the pillow to his chest and gave Merry a soulful look. “How do we know that for certain? Who told you that elves don’t play pranks?”

Merry blinked. Well, elves were elves. They were the Elder Race, beings of serenity and light. Surely they were too serene to indulge in mortal entertainments. Weren’t they?

“Let’s go join Frodo,” Merry said at last, dodging Pippin’s question. “No one can get us in his room.”

It was better, after all, to be safe than sorry.

*****

Aragorn looked down at his handiwork speculatively. He reached out and nudged a cup slightly to the left. There. Everything was perfectly aligned.

He had taken a great deal of care putting together this tea tray. It held a pot of tea, a plate of sandwiches, a plate of biscuits, and two teacups. Everything a hobbit would require for tea.

Grinning diabolically, Aragorn picked up the tray and took it to one of the kitchen staff, the elf maiden responsible for taking the hobbits their tea. Luinil gazed at the smug Ranger drily for a moment, than took the tray. She had had far too much experience with this particular mortal to not know when he was up to something.

“I hope this does not have anything to do with the frog found in your bed, Estel,” she said.

Aragorn adopted a totally innocent expression, saw Luinil raise an eyebrow, and sighed. “Only a little, I promise. Please just take it to them.”

Luinil rolled her eyes to the heavens. “Mortals. Children, all of them. Very well, you young cad. Now get on with ye.”

Aragorn nodded his thanks and bowed himself out of the kitchen. Why was it that he could never pull the wool over Luinil’s eyes? She treated him the way Frodo treated Pippin: like a young lad that must be indulged. Interesting.

*****

Merry idly wondered if it was a pitying look he saw on the elf maiden’s face as she put the tea tray down beside him. No, it couldn’t be, she looked far too serene.

“Thank you,” he said, and helped himself to the tea.

“Pour me some, Merry,” Pippin commanded, picking up a teacup and presenting it to his cousin. “Thanks.”

Merry poured two fragrant cups and inhaled the steam deeply. The maiden left the room, shutting the door quietly behind her so as not to disturb Frodo, who was dozing on his bed, and Bilbo, who was dozing in his chair.

Merry raised his glass to Pippin. “To us, for managing to avoid Strider all day,” he said.

“Here, here!” Pippin cheered softly.

The hobbits put their cups to their lips and gulped the warm tea. Both felt their throats close as something hot seared their mouths. Both choked on their tea as they fell over, coughing and gagging, wailing at the pain of whatever had been put in their tea.

*****

Aragorn, sitting out in the garden nearby, cackled to himself quietly. He had taken the liberty of adding a certain spice to Merry and Pippin’s tea, a certain spice known in the common speech as red-hot chili pepper.

TBC