Chapter 42. Be Mindful of our Condition

'The leg looks good,' Elladan said in satisfaction.

'I agree,' Elrohir said, and then he looked more closely at his brother. 'Now go and sit down before you fall down.'

Ferdi heard the injured son of Elrond settle into the chair beside the bed. 'What does "looks good" mean?' he asked.

'I cannot tell you, I am averting my eyes,' Pimpernel answered him with a squeeze of his hand. 'I would never have made a good healer, such things make me feel all queer.'

'We cannot have that,' Ferdi said firmly. 'Avert your eyes, Nell, my love.'

'I am nothing if not obedient,' Pimpernel said.

'It means that there is no sign of infection, that all the flesh I can see is healthy, pink, and healing, that the bones are knitting well and have a good blood supply; in other words, master chancellor, I think we can safely say that you will keep your leg,' Elladan said from his place beside the bed.

Ferdi took a deep breath and let it out again. Only the pressure of his hand on Pimpernel's told of the enormity of his relief.

'It also means that we may stitch up the open wound,' Elrohir said. 'But I insist on a sleeping draught before we begin.'

'Have at it,' Ferdi said. 'But how do you expect to stitch if you are asleep?'

'A sleeping draught for you,' Elrohir emphasized, and Ferdi grinned at having been able to tease the son of Elrond. 'The best time would be this evening, I think; then you will simply sleep through until morning, waking refreshed and no worse for the experience.'

'How nice,' Ferdi murmured politely, and Pimpernel gave him a push.

'Knock, knock,' Pippin's voice came from the doorway.

'Enter at your own risk,' Ferdi answered. 'They're talking about needles and sleeping draughts at the moment.'

'You distract them if they go for me, Ferdi, and I will run for help,' Pippin said, advancing into the room. 'I do believe there is a Southron nearby, who enjoys a bit of exercise with his weapon; and failing that, there's always Gimli and his axe.'

'We will leave you for the nonce,' Elrohir said.

'Mentioning Gimli's axe does it every time,' Pippin said in satisfaction.

'Until this evening, then,' Ferdi replied with a casual wave.

'This evening,' Elladan repeated, getting up from his chair.

'Come, have a seat, Pippin,' Ferdi invited.

Pimpernel started to get up from the bed, saying, 'Do you want me to leave?'

'No,' her brother said. 'This concerns you as well, Nelly-lass.'

'What is it?' Ferdi said.

Pippin cleared his throat, but did not speak.

'I am all ears,' Ferdi encouraged.

'This is a bit difficult, Ferdi,' Pippin said. 'I find myself in the invidious position of having to beg.'

'Beg away,' Ferdi answered airily. 'The worst I can say is "No".'

'I am asking...' Pippin said slowly, 'ah, but it is difficult, Ferdi, I do not know what you will think of me when I am finished. I am asking you to give up the Westmarch, consider staying on at the Smials, for I do not know how I can manage without you.'

'You want me to...' Ferdi said, stunned. Pimpernel squeezed his hand.

There was a long silence while Pimpernel and her brother watched Ferdi's face... confusion, dawning understanding, unlooked-for hope...

'You want me to stay on at the Smials?' Ferdi said at last.

'Yes,' Pippin answered, shame-facedly. It was clear from his tone how reluctantly he asked, how strongly he felt he was doing Ferdibrand a disservice.

Ferdi shook his head in wonder. 'You expected me to continue as Warden of Westmarch?' he said incredulously.

'Why, of course,' Pippin said. 'You're the best hobbit for the job.' He sighed. 'There is still much work to be done, more surveys, plans for accepting applications for settlement, deciding how to parcel out the land. The King won't make the gift official, of course, until we have finished all the preliminary work. How long do you think it would take?'

'We'd probably be finished and ready to accept the land from the King sometime next year,' Ferdi said, distracted, but then he was struck anew with amazement. 'You expected me to continue as Warden of Westmarch?' he repeated.

'Of course!' Pippin repeated, sounding annoyed. He hated to repeat himself.

'But I can't see!' Ferdi said.

'What does that have to do with it?' Pippin asked in surprise.

'I... ' Ferdi was at a loss for words. 'You need me?'

'Ferdi,' Pippin said in exasperation. 'I do not know where you got the idea that you can just waltz off without a word to anyone and not be sorely missed.'

'I... ' Ferdi said again.

'As a matter of fact, I have been at my wit's end,' Pippin said. 'Do you know how difficult it has been, to continue as Thain with only half a steward and no chancellor?'

'I... Ferdi said.

'I've been sorely tempted to chuck everything and run off to Gondor, I'll have you know,' Pippin said severely. 'Now, if you please, put me out of my misery. Can I rely on you? Or are you going to insist upon staying in the Westmarch and leave me in the lurch?'

'If you truly need me...' Ferdi began.

'Ferdibrand Took!' Pippin said, as close to shouting as Ferdi had ever heard him. 'What have I been telling you this whole time?'

'Of course I'll give up the Westmarch,' Ferdi said. 'I will stay at the Smials.'

Pippin heaved a great sigh. 'You do not know what a burden you have lifted from my shoulders, cousin,' he said.

'I don't know what to say,' Ferdi answered.

'You might start with "You're welcome",' Pimpernel said. 'I do believe my brother just thanked you.'

'You're welcome,' Ferdi said obediently.

'Not at all,' Pippin said, and rose from his chair. 'I'm glad we had this little talk.' He took out his handkerchief and wiped his forehead. 'I'm famished,' he said. 'I'm going in search of sustenance. Would you like me to bring you anything?'

'Certainly,' Ferdi answered. 'I'll take whatever they have going.'

'Very well,' Pippin said, and left the room.

***

That evening, Ferdi obediently drank the sleeping draught, while Pimpernel sat beside him, arm about his shoulders. As Elrohir and Elessar pulled away the supporting pillows and eased him back on the bed, his wife lay down beside him and wrapped her arms about him.

'Nell, my own?' he murmured sleepily as the draught took effect.

'I am here, Ferdi, my love,' Pimpernel whispered in his ear. He took a deep breath, and she felt him relax. 'I think we are ready,' she said softly.

Elrohir washed the leg with something, and then probed with an experimental needle, but Ferdi made no sign of feeling, she saw before closing her eyes and snuggling closer. She listened for a while to the quiet conversation, Elladan occasionally contributing a comment from his chair, but the warm security of her husband nestled in her arms combined with the soft voices speaking in a lilting tongue to beguile her into sleep.

At length the stitchery was finished. Elessar stepped back to survey the leg, then nodded. 'We will leave it suspended for the rest of the night,' he said, 'and watch for signs of infection, though I doubt we will see any.'

'It appears to be healing rapidly,' Elrohir said. 'These halflings are amazing creatures; they mend so much more quickly than Man or Elf.'

'I would have said that the leg could not be saved at all,' Elladan added. 'I am very glad I listened to your counsel, Elfstone, and made the attempt.'

The King inclined his head. 'I had seen such healing in hopeless cause before,' he said. 'As you have. Remember the Ring-bearer and his companion after Mount Doom, as well as the Thain after they pulled him from under the troll...'

'Indeed,' Elladan said. 'I thought it a fluke, that perhaps Mithrandir had lent you some of his powers to save the little ones. But now...' he looked to the small figures in the bed and shook his head in wonder.

There was a rustle at the door and a messenger said, 'King Elessar, Cirdan wishes to see you, if you are finished here.'

'We will watch with him, Elfstone,' Elrohir said. 'You go ahead.'

The King nodded and took his leave.

Elrohir sat down in one of the other chairs, and the brothers watched for a long time without speaking. At one point, Ferdi seemed to rouse slightly; one questing hand found his wife's hair and stroked it gently, then both his arms went around her and he sighed and slept again, while her grasp on him tightened.

Elrohir looked to Elladan and surprised a curious look on his brother's face. 'What is it?' he asked.

Elladan took a deep breath and did not answer for a span of time, but of course, Elves had time and to spare, so Elrohir was used to such silences. Finally Elladan spoke. 'I find myself... in envy of mortals,' he said at last.

Elrohir allowed his surprise to show on his face.

Elladan saw, and continued. 'Look at them, brother, the depth of love between them, all the sweeter because of their doom--the gift of Eru. They sustain one another; you can almost see the force of life flowing from one to the other.' He sighed. 'Had our mother been a halfling, she would never have left our father.'

'A curious thought,' Elrohir said, his eyes on the entwined couple. Pimpernel had settled with her head against Ferdi's chest, his heartbeat in her ear, while Ferdi, in his sleep, nuzzled her curls. 'Had our mother been a halfling, they never would have married.'

His brother looked at him with exasperation clear on his face. 'You know exactly what I mean,' he said. 'Do not put up a shield to evade the issue.'

'As if it were a sword to strike me down,' Elrohir said practically.

His brother looked at him thoughtfully. 'It is a sword, brother.' He took another deep breath, as if testing the air. 'I have made my choice.'

'What have you chosen?' Elrohir said, curious.

His twin regarded him solemnly. 'I think you already know,' he said softly. They spoke no more that night.

***

Notes from original posting:

Notes to Readers:

Thanks for the reviews! Very helpful, quite motivating.

Am feeling better, thank you for the good wishes. The Muse is back from vacation but feeling a bit rusty; the writing goes, but does not flow as usual. At least the clouds have lifted. I go through this on a regular basis, so thanks for bearing with me.

FantasyFan, yes, Ferdi might suspect that it is a sop to a blind, pathetic hobbit, except for the fact that Pippin really does need him, and shows it as they continue to work together. And Everard, sadly, is in the background in this story, and will continue as a matter of mention by other characters, kind of like an actor in a continuing television series who goes missing from a few episodes for personal reasons. But do not worry, Ev'ard's fine and will appear in upcoming stories, I'm sure.

Bookworm, yes, but Ferdi's only lost the use of his eyes. He still has his ears, his brain, his wit... I could go on and on but won't.

Xena, I am touched by your confidence. I hope I usually know what I'm doing. Sometimes I have to just trust the Muse and keep writing until we get through a situation, and then it turns out that we did know what we were doing after all... I am not sure how hobbits capture folk's hearts, but I do know they've a firm grip on mine.

Poiniard, welcome to the parlour. Just take the books off that chair over there, put them on the floor, someone will sort them out later. How do you like your tea? You cannot believe a hobbit would resent other hobbits? I dunno. I look at Lobelia, and the miller Sandyman, and the hobbits who reputedly were in league with the ruffians, and I come to the conclusion that they were capable of resentment and envy.

Aemilia Rose, do not give it away, now! *smile*. O, and Ferdi told me to tell you he appreciates your support.

Look for a new chapter to this story, if ff.net agrees, in two days. Angst forecast: we are in happier times in both stories (this one and "Flames"), fairly clear sailing from here on out, as I recall.
 
Look for the newest chapter to "Flames", in case you are following that story, on the morrow. Thank you for your patience.