Chapter 2:  discussions we never wanted to have

Dawn was just creeping over the encircling mountains shielding the valley of Imladris from unfriendly eyes when the door to Lord Elrond’s private suite banged open and his eldest son stormed into the room closely followed by his brother.

Irritated, the Elf-Lord looked up and directed a questioning gaze at his sons. The look that made many a subject quaver made the older twin slow his hurried steps and after a short flashing of eyes Elladan lowered his head.

Acting on a nod from his father toward the open door Elrohir hurried to close it. “I’m sorry, father,” Elladan finally said. However, as soon as the Elf-lord’s features had softened, the older twin stepped closer. “We have to go now. We cannot waste any more time…..”

“Elladan!”

The sharp command stopped the string of words effectively. Elladan shut his mouth; quick-witted enough to not glare at his father. Elrohir held his breath. Rarely did their father use such a tone with them.

Elrond in contrast took a deep breath. They had already held this discussion two hours before. Shortly after Thalan had died, Elladan had demanded to ride out at once to bring the dead members of the patrol home.

Elrond had made his opinion on this decision clear. As much as he wished the same, he would not send out another patrol or anyone else who might fall victim to whatever unknown was threatening them. He would certainly not send anyone in the dead of night.

Whatever had killed Glorfindel and his well trained patrol was still out there. The light of day would give them some protection. Elladan had argued that the light of day had not sheltered the warriors of the previous patrol but Elrond had been adamant and was not to be moved.

Elladan had been furious and only his respect for his father and his fear of the wrath that he would bring down upon himself by disobeying a clear order had prevented him from storming off. This insight had only lasted until now however and the Elf-lord was not willing to discuss everything all over again.

Waiting until both of his sons looked at him again Elrond continued. “You need not demand, the preparations are nearly finished,” he said with a sweep of his hand towards the packed bags on his bed.

Only now truly noticing what their stormy entrance had interrupted Elladan’s eyes lit up and with a slight bow he turned; nearly running over his brother who was right behind him. The sharp intake of breath from his father however froze him on the spot.

“But,” the Elf-lord said with deliberate slowness until he had the undivided attention of both of his sons. “I’m not sure if you two will go with the party.”

“What?” was the expected cry and this time it was Elrohir who had stepped in front of his brother. When his father did not react to the outburst Elrohir took a deep breath.

“But, Ada,” he said with a much more controlled voice. Elrohir knew exactly how to approach his angered father. Elrond was after all hurting as much as they were and his nerves were as taut as everyone else’s in the house right now.

“You cannot deny us the right to ride out with the search party. Glorfindel was as dear as….” his voice faltered and he lowered his eyes. Elrond sighed and his heart went out to his tender-hearted son. He knew that the death of Glorfindel had struck the boys nearly as hard as when their mother had left.

Stepping closer the healer laid a gentle hand on Elrohir’s shoulder until he looked up again. “I know, my son, and that’s the reason why you two should not come.”

Accepting defeat Elrohir took a ragged breath, not so Elladan. He stepped around his brother and Elrohir realized with dread that his twin had now overstepped his boundaries.

His father’s taut posture said as much. To his surprise however, Elladan restrained his anger and lowered his voice.

“Ada, please, we are no longer children. We appreciate your wish to protect us from the cruel sight that will surely await us. Alas we’ve already seen so much cruelty done in our long years on the road, that we are sure we can face this.” Taking a deep breath Elladan looked at his brother for support.

Elrohir stepped next to his brother and waited until their father’s attention had shifted toward him. “Ada we want to be there to give our friend the last escort he deserves. Please, do not ask us to stay.”

Closing his eyes briefly the Elf-lord took sighed.

His sons were right. His reluctance to let them come stemmed from the desire to protect them from seeing loved ones and long time friends brutally killed. Yet, Elladan was also right that they had seen more brutality than he cared to ever learn.

The Elf-lord opened his eyes and although the brothers could see that they had won the argument they were also appalled by the pain this agreement caused their father.

“Very well. But I will be in command of this trip and I expect you to follow my orders precisely. When I ask you to stay away I expect you to do it. Have I made myself clear?”

“Yes, my Lord!” the twins answered in unison, aware now that they had maybe not thought about what they had asked for. Nonetheless they would face this trial; they were Lords of this house after all and not known for cowardice. They would give a renowned Lord his final honour regardless of the pain it would bring to their hearts.

When a nod released them the twins turned and opened the door. Elrohir quickly shoved his brother out into the corridor so that he would not forfeit the victory they had just gained.

………………………………..

Shortly after the twins had left his rooms another knock sounded on the door and Elrond looked up in surprise. His sons would surely not bother him again for fear that he would change his mind at the last moment. He was still not sure if he had made the right decision by allowing them to come. The brothers were smart enough to know this.

Yet he could guess who demanded his attention now and he was not up to another unwanted discussion.

“Enter”, he called after he had arranged the last packed bag which only held items he would carry personally near the table. Elrond allowed himself a small smile when Erestor entered. His guess had been right.

Elrond inclined his head after observing his advisor. The normally self-controlled councillor seemed agitated. The stormy grey eyes were narrowed and he panted as if he had run to get here.

“What can I do for you?” Elrond asked with a forcefully calm voice, having no desire to placate another in these dark hours. He was in dire need of some tranquillity himself, yet he knew that he would not get it any time soon.

“My Lord,” Erestor returned quickly because he could clearly sense his Lord’s impatience. “I’ve come across your sons. They are preparing to ride out with the search party and told me you have consented to it. They are not telling the truth, of course.”

Being tired, grieving and on the edge of his nerves himself, he attributed those same feelings to the other members of his household.  The Master of lore sighed and responded in a low voice. 

“Erestor, they told you the truth. I am allowing them to come.” The incredulous look on the dark haired elf’s face would have amused the healer had it happened under other circumstances.

“But, Elrond, you cannot be serious. They… ” Elrond’s eyes flashed dangerously.

“Erestor!”

The same sharp command that had stopped his son’s impertinence silenced his advisor now. Although Erestor was not in the least intimidated, he quickly remembered his manners.

“I’m sorry, my Lord. I forgot my place.”

Regretting his harsh reaction already Elrond sighed. But he was not in the mood to respond like he usually would.

“Never mind, Erestor. Is there anything else you want to…?”

Seeing the fixed gaze of his advisor on his packed bags Elrond closed his mouth and prepared himself for the worst yet to come. He did not have to read his councillor’s mind to know what would come next and he did not have to wait long.

“Elrond, you are not considering going yourself?” Erestor asked and the calm Elrond had missed earlier in the councillor’s voice was now back, with much too great a force.

Stepping forward and indicating the two comfortable chairs Elrond bade his visitor to sit.

Only sitting on the edge of his seat Erestor was not to be deterred.

“But, Elrond….”

When the healer held up his hand the dark haired elf finally consented and leaned back, pressing his fingertips together; a clear sign that he was most displeased with the situation.

“Yes, Erestor I intend to go and furthermore I will be in charge of the warriors going with me and in command of the whole trip.”

When Erestor started to protest again Elrond held his hand up again and was able to restrain his friend a second time.

“Erestor, I’ve allowed my sons to come for the same reason I want to go. We cannot let him be retrieved by anyone else…..” now it was his voice that faltered and Erestor swallowed himself. “And maybe someone is in need of a healer.” Elrond added.

Erestor looked up irritated. Seeing the strange look Elrond rose and laid a gentle hand on the taut shoulder. “I did not mean a member of the patrol of course but maybe a member of the rescue party.”

Letting out his breath slowly Erestor nodded and looked up. “Very well, my Lord, but then you must allow me to come too. Someone has to see to your safety, after all. Who knows? Maybe even a great healer will be in need of a shoulder to lean on.

Elrond smiled and this time it was genuine. Knowing that Erestor did not mean it literally he appreciated it nonetheless.

“I had hoped that you would say that,” he answered and Erestor squeezed the arm of the healer comfortingly before he left.

Elrond smiled after his councillor had closed the door. Erestor had quickly but unconsciously stepped into Glorfindel’s role to remind him mercilessly when he endangered his life. As sad as this development was, Elrond appreciated it even more.

…………………………………………

With a frown directed towards the darkening sky, Master Elrond stepped outside the front door and observed the hustle in the courtyard. The members of the rescue party had already gathered there. Many helpers hastened about to deliver requested items.

The elves in the party had packed a huge wagon they intended to bring with them. Elrohir and Erestor were taking inventory of the things already on board while Elladan paced impatiently up and down the front porch making the helpers nervous.

The nerves of everyone involved were already on edge and many a harshly exchanged word could be heard. Elrond briefly closed his eyes when he witnessed a sharp command from his son toward a stable hand. The poor boy had not tethered the horses quickly enough for the older twin’s liking.

The Elf-lord did not intervene because he knew that his son would apologize when he realized that he was not the only one grieving. If not, he would make sure of it.

Elrond’s thoughts were occupied otherwise, and he did not want to interrupt what was progressing smoothly enough without his presence. He would make use of the remaining time before departing to do his duty as Master of this valley. Sadly he had performed this duty much too often in the long years their haven had existed.

With a sedate pace he crossed the lawn where his gaze was fixed on a humble house not far from the main cluster of buildings in the centre of the valley. The rain clouds overhead matched his mood. He hardened his heart against the storm of emotions that would shortly assault him.

Not that he minded, and the newly widowed elf had every reason to cry out her sorrow, but he always felt powerless to assuage the pain and the words of condolence sounded hollow. He had already sent a trained healer of his staff ahead to inform the family.

Nonetheless it was his duty to bring words of reassurance and to express his sympathy. He knew that his words held no meaning at the moment and yet they were expected and appreciated later.

Straightening his shoulders and emptying his mind the Elf-lord knocked on the door. He could hear no sound behind the closed door, apart from quiet footfalls until the door was opened a crack. Selinde, his most trusted healer smiled sadly and opened the door wider so he could slip inside.

Elrond thanked her with a silent nod and looked around while the healer closed the door quietly. The little living room was neatly arranged and looked cosy. A few wooden toys were turned over and forgotten on the floor. The Elf-lord swallowed. Captain Thalan’s son was just about ten years old. Glorfindel had often talked about him with affection after visiting his second in command. How eager the little elfling already was to step into his father’s boots. The little boy adored Glorfindel and could not wait to come of age.

Glorfindel had always teased him that he would be the youngest warrior in his ranks. Maybe his wish would sadly come true much too fast. Lost in his thoughts Elrond started when Selinde touched his elbow. “My Lord I’ve given her a slight sedative but she’s awake now. I have sent the boy to their neighbour’s next door.”

Elrond nodded while squeezing her hand in gratitude and walked toward the door where she was pointing. Selinde stayed back. She knew him all too well. This he had to do alone. He was glad that he had no witness of his anguish. He had hidden behind his mask and was sad that he could not share the burden.

Knocking softly on the door to the little sleeping room Elrond did not wait for an invitation. He knew that it would not come. Too often he had experienced this very moment.

He stepped around the door and walked deliberately slowly toward the woman sitting on the bed. As expected she did not look up; her gaze forlornly directed at nothing. With cramped fingers she clutched a tunic to her chest; according to the size undoubtedly belonging to her husband.

The healer briefly closed his eyes when the familiar ache of desperation burned against his fea. He could understand her only too well but that was not what she wanted to hear…what she needed to hear.

Slowly he sat beside her on the bed. Even now she did not look up but he knew that she had acknowledged him by the ragged breath she took. He gently pried the cold fingers away from the fabric and replaced the token with a stuffed horse he had snatched from a cabinet near the door.

At first reluctantly but then with a fierce grip she clutched the toy and pressed it against her chest. With red rimmed eyes she finally looked up and Elrond hoped that she caught the meaning.

While she searched his eyes Elrond recognized some strength in her gaze that nurtured his hope that she would not fade after her loss and would endeavour to stay in Middle Earth if only for her little son.

Taking both of her hands into his, he sent healing energy into the grief-wracked body. “Lady Liriel, I’ve come to express my heart-felt sorrow over the death of your husband. Thalan had done great service to this realm; he was a beloved member of our community and a cherished husband and father. For you and your son, I’m so sorry for your loss.”

When she swallowed and did not burst into tears again, Elrond carefully broke the contact to her fea. “I hope that you can find the strength to remain here in Middle-earth. Your son is a delight and I would be glad to see him reach his majority.  But if you decide to sail you will get any help I’m able to provide.”

With gratitude in her eyes she nodded bravely. “Thank you, Master Elrond, but right now I cannot decide what to do. First I have to tell my son what….what happened to his father and that will be hard enough.”

Laying a hand on her shoulder in sympathy and imparting comfort again Elrond rose. “However you decide; I will support your decision. If you need anything you have but to ask.”

“Thank you, my Lord,” she whispered and rose also. Elrond squeezed her hand before he opened the door.

Selinde was already standing there and slipped inside as soon as the Elf-lord had left the room. “I will take care of her” the healer whispered quietly.

When Elrond had taken a deep breath and just rounded the cluster of bushes fencing the little house he heard a childish cry. “Nana, Nana, I’m back. Aunt Nindé gave me some honey cakes. When does Ada come back?”

Elrond closed his eyes. Thank the Valar that he did not have to answer that question.

To be continued…………