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| Evensong by Rose Sared | 10 Review(s) |
|---|---|
| TithenFeredir | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 7/14/2005 |
| First you put the reader off guard with the poor, frustrated sentry unable to keep Legolas off the roof, then you follow with Arwen's terrible vision--a nicely startling contrast. I had never thought of Arwen's decline involving her actually aging--that would be horrifying for an elf, as if losing her love so quickly were not enough. I loved the warm, sibling-like relationship between Arwen and Legolas. The two of them and Aragorn seemed like a close-knit family, a loving triangle of familiarity. Gimli's disappearance at the end of the chapter is a nice cliffhanger. And all through this chapter you have scattered little treasures: A wicked breeze probed round the room like a finger in a jar. Arwen saw herself shrink into morbid old age, wrinkled and white-haired, her doom upon and past her leaving her a winter leaf crackled and frail, her husband dead on the mattress behind, the world empty of her kin. Those two gave me a shiver. “Come with us, my lady. A company of elves we would make, and hold back any fell airs with our singing.” I couldn't say why, but that statement brightened the entire scene. Elvish magic, maybe? A flight of agitated ducks clattered out of hiding and into the air...The sudden singing of Legolas’ bow sharpened his attention...all that fell were two of the unfortunate waterfowl. “Dinner.” Legolas was unrepentant. “Show off,” grumbled Gimli. *Chuckle* ...almost all of the company were occupied in unloading and caring for the horses. He needed to stretch his legs after bumping for most of the day on the back of that demon. I love your take on Gimli's POV. Wind that circles a room like a finger in a jar, clattering ducks and land that undulates under its waving grass-hair, the horror of withering with age and loss...your imagery is original and so evocative. It really brings that world to life as a unique, separate place. Wonderful! ~TF Author Reply: TF you do a fine line in reviews! I may have to kidnap you and keep you to be deployed every time I am convinced my writing is complete rubbish (a somewhat frequent happening) I am glad you are enjoying this tale, I am beavering away at the other end of it trying to get my recalcitrant characters to do what I would like and to move the (so called) plot along. Strong minded lot these chappies.Poor old Arwen has not managed to get much of a look in this fic - I can hear her voice nearer the end though. As I said to Daw - imagery is easy, after all I live in New Zealand, although trying to avoid the cliche is rather more difficult(sigh) Thanks very much for the encouragement Rose | |
| Robinscat | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 10/28/2004 |
| Rose, Thank you so much for writing of my favorite elf and dwarf. Well writen stories of Legolas and Gimli are a treasure. And an extra bonus of Aragorn is always nice. Thank you for your gift. Please keep writing. Author Reply: Hi, thanks for your review. I intend to keep writing and Gimli and his elf do tend to take up most of stage centre! Hopefully I will be able to update later this weekend. Look forward to hearing from you again. Rose | |
| Imrahoil | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 10/26/2004 |
| That wasn't a review, this is a review: You really are an original. Legolas- and Frodotorturing is regrettably as common as mud, but relentless Gimlibashing is unprecendented - at least as far as I know, perhaps it's different on Axe & Bow -, in other words, give my favourite character back. Asap and unhurt! Poor Arwen, I liked the way you handled her fears in Cadenza and it doesn't loose its poignancy when worked into the suspense part of a story. By the way, I don't have any idea where/what the story is driving at. I don't like that. I just hate cliffhangers. ;-) I can't stand waiting. Next chapter, please! Oh, "a doom" is correct, will remember the context, so it doesn't happen again, thank you. Author Reply: Ah a review at last, you being so remiss in rewiewing and all:)) Gimlibashing - well he is so much himself in all situations I just love popping him in the midst of things to see what will happen. (You mean I am supposed to know where this story is going -oops!) Axe/Bow does have some good stories, but they are rather remiss on the updates so I don't post there (probably just as well!) Thanks for the attention - appreciated as always. Rose | |
| grumpy | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 10/25/2004 |
| what a great chapter. Loved the thought of Duilin thinking of ways to get the elf off the roof. So kind and understanding of Arwin to let Aragorn get out of the city for awhile, hate the thought of him all couped up. Plus you let halloween in early with whatever was in the mirror, and gone and lost Gimli. looking forward to more Author Reply: Yep those creepy halloween thoughts are a dreadful influence, LOL. Thanks for the review I do appreciate your enjoyment. Rose | |
| lwarren | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 10/25/2004 |
| Oh yeah, back to your old tricks, I see! Leaving poor unsuspecting readers dangling by their poor tired fingernails from a high cliff over a bottomless chasm!! (oooo, drama queen in residence right now...sorry RS!). "Dinner." Legolas was unrepentant. "Show off," grumbled Gimli. I do LOVE an unrepentant elf!!! :-) (Had to get that quote in before memory failed!) This was a very tricksy chapter, RS. I was all set for an elven concert from LG and AU and what happens but Fright Night! That was very well done...and you leave lots of hints and unanswered questions and clues and...not all of it's good! Legolas' cut not closing as it should (did that have something to do with the very atmosphere in the room when that "fell spirit" entered?) The creepy visions in Arwen's mirror - and how convenient was it that the evil preyed on her most distressing and everpresent fear? Gimli's vision is now taking on some substance...and the threat grows more dangerous and deadly by the minute. So the guys are off to save the world...and Arwen's off to reform her grandkids (take it from me...such reformations are NOT permanent...and the little darlings hold it against you...HOW RUDE IS THAT?) ;-) Ducks, and missing Dwarfs! Must find the dwarf soon, RS! (Which means, m'dear, thou must update ASAP! hehehehehe!) uh oh, must go...fingernail is breaking off due to lack of concentration! Great chapter...really, more please! linda Author Reply: No, no go get the nail glue - must hang on for just a little longer. Sorry about the damage to the manicure (insincere laugh) Off to see the nixies next chapter - Gimli giving his friends even more grey hairs. Do love your reviews, thanks so much. Rose | |
| Imrahoil | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 10/25/2004 |
| AHAH, a new chapter, Imrahoil pounces gleefully upon the printout and retreats into her corner munching happily on the paper. Review comes as soon as the content is digested. First hiccup: Is "a doom" correct?! Author Reply: Ah, yes, in this case. Arwen is perfectly aware of the end of her and Aragorn's life together, of the mortal grief that will afflict her, even though she does not know the exact date of that end. So the doom that awaits is quite specific, and therefor 'the'. Thanks, as ever, for the review, I love nitpicks, never fear. Rose | |
| Bodkin | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 10/25/2004 |
| I just had a look at Adagio Chapter 2 as mentioned, and it has reminded me just how much I love Tolman. He needs more exposure - he is just such a great character. Elf-bane! So funny. I hope Aragorn now carries it beside the athelas to use on Legolas when the sea-longing hits. Author Reply: Oh no, the cast of thousands are advancing on me even as we speak, all with their hand up wanting a "speaking part" if you please. The hobbit is nearly as bad as the pesky girlfriend for popping up unexpectedly, but is not on the horizon just yet. We will have to see what happens in later chapters, Rose. | |
| daw the minstrel | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 10/24/2004 |
| I wasn't expecting that vision of Arwen's. I wonder what's up? And where's Gimli? It can't have taken him hours to dress some birds. Author Reply: And then he left them behind? Strange aye? Still the magical forces behind M/E may have met their match with my favorite dwarf. Ch6 asap. Rose | |
| Jay of Lasgalen | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 10/24/2004 |
| There are some lovely images and similes in this story. I like the idea of elves on the rooftops despite the guards' best efforts, and Duilin glaring at the ceiling ' like one of the palace cats swearing vilely at blackbirds that taunted from near but too far branches. Wonderful. Arwen's vision is horrifying, though - and clearly the evil is widespread. Duilin's reactions were amazing - he must have been incredibly fast to cut Legolas! And what has happened to Gimli? :( Jay Author Reply: The trouble with Duilin is that he is a tad unpredictable - even for our favorite elf. Verrrrrry loyal but.(for why have a look at ch2 Adagio) Glad you are enjoying the ride, I have had my head buried in books of mythology all week trying to make the next ch fly - we will see. Rose | |
| Bodkin | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 10/24/2004 |
| Oh, good, good, good. Poor Arwen - unsurprisingly she finds the whole age and death thing to be seriously distressing. It was such a lovely start - the singing and the elf on the roof, only to descend into horror. And Legolas's cut refusing to heal - all very ominous. I hope Arwen will be all right in Pelargir. I love the humouring of Aragorn - very wise of her to let him go and play with the boys for a while, providing nothing goes amiss. 'I saw a blue stone and an ancient being, drawing all to itself, until the earth is drained.' Oh dear. Has Arwen a touch of the Galadriel foresight? Doesn't sound good. And what has become of Gimli? He had time to deal with the ducks - so how long has he been gone? Is Minuial going to feature at all in this story? Author Reply: Minuial has a way of insinuating herself into my fics whether I want her there or not - her way of keeping dibs on his highness I think :> (weird, I am not wierd) Anyhoo,Gimli is going to confuound the spirits of M/E and probably shorten his friends life with anxiety in the meantime. I don't see why Arwen should miss out on her heritage - with Galadrial as Gran and Elrond as Pa she was always fated to have forsight. (Now if only she could give some to me!) On to Ch6 Rose | |