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Okay, NOW Panic! by Boz4PM	11 Review(s)
miss	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/20/2006
Well I dont understand one thing....why does penny belong in ME? I mean, its such a simple answer to a difficult question. It really bugs me [ in a good way. sorry for this short review, I liked this chapter very much because [for me ] it left more questions than answers Author Reply: Thanks for reviewing, miss. Glad you liked the chapter. As ever, the story is revealed in stages (even if I pick threads long ago laid down) and this is not the last we will here on this issue. ;) Author Reply: Or even 'hear'. sigh (Note to self: try reading replies to reviews before posting) Sorry! lol

AspenJules	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/18/2006
Oh I love this story! I did something this chapter that I don't usually do and I read through all the reviews before writing my own. There are simply so many comments I could make that I have to leave some out because I just don't have time to write them all. This way I can comment on some things that you haven't already heard. I really enjoyed the talk with Gandalf, and I feel like I am right there with Penny. I have been afraid that she would be ending up by going back home because the thoughts of her family were cropping up more and more, but I like better the concept that she is beginning to accept that she won't see them again. The coffin dream especially was poignant in showing her that perhaps they are "putting her to rest" in their own world, and she needs to do the same. She truly will need to grieve for them some, as well as getting past the guilt that she prefers to stay. It's almost an interesting parallel to Arwen's situation. They could maybe have an interesting discussion on the subject, if it is not too painful for Arwen. As for telling them about Saruman... I think if I were her I would confide in Elrond. After all, he is one of the "Wise" and is not, if my memory doesn't fail me, one of those who meets up with Saruman and Grima. (Too bad Eomer wasn't still with them, I'll bet he wouldn't have had too much difficulty deciding what to do with him! grin) Anyway, I think she could have a good discusion of the situation with Elrond and perhaps together they could come up with a decision on the best course of action. On one hand - would Frodo have felt less guilt and ultimately suffered less if the Shire hadn't experienced the worst of the Troubles? Or would the other three hobbits have had a more difficult time when Frodo left without the confidence they gained in dealing with it themselves? Ack, this is long nonetheless... However, I just have to add that I like the way the relationship between Penny and Halladan is developing. He is learning that she can hold her tongue, that she is trustworthy as well as caring, and that she does have more knowledge and understanding of life than might be immediately noticeable. It appears to me that he is coming to respect her, as well as care about her as more than just a pleasant responsibility. They are at least becoming friends, the best kind of friends who can share everything and depend on each other. Of course... those make the best kinds of spouses...... Grins unrepentantly and fights a fierce but ultimately successful battle to hold her tongue on any other suggestions or comments. As always, Boz... thanks trainloads for sharing this product of your imagination, intelligence, knowledge and research with us. I know I am richer for it. Author Reply: Thank you for such a long and detailed review! :) I had not thought of the parallel to Arwen, actually - thank you for pointing that out to me. I shall go away and ponder on that, because there was likely to be a conversation at some point with Arwen that may or may not have touched on the subject of Arwen's choice in more detail (given the 'farewell scene' between Elrond and Arwen that will occur in Rohan). Your idea about Elrond is a good one except he is one of those that meets Saruman. The only one is not there is Aragorn since he only travels as far as the Gap of Rohan with them. And think you are exactly right: Eomer would not think twice! lol I am not sure Frodo would have suffered much less, in truth. The hobbits never fully understood or appreciated what he had done and that was in spite of what happened right under their noses as an effect of the War and upheaval. Frodo was changed by his wounds and what he had been through as much as anything - and that accounted for his melancholy as much if not more than anything else IMHO. For all the destruction, much good came out of the Scouring of the Shire - especially in establishing the reputations of Merry, Pippin and Sam, let alone the realisation finally hitting the hobbits that something momentous and terrible had been happening. I'm so glad you find the relationship between Halladan and Penny to be realistic and to have the kind of depth you described. They are indeed becoming firm friends, and she needs a few of those who are not elves (and thus likely to leave any time soon), I think.

Lindelea	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/18/2006
whew. Once again you have left me limp with reaction. Such a lot of emotion to get through! I will go on to lighter fare: I am an ellon, Pen-ii, I am allowed to be inconsistent in my storytelling if I so choose. LOL! What an excuse! No doubt he would be along later if his adoring public could spare him. Ah, Merry, living up to your name, how nice. Japes? What are japes? I would have left a review last night but was interrupted before I even began to read (sleepy child out of bed). Had a little bit of time this afternoon and finished. Whew. So, it looks as if, so far as we can tell, Penny will stay. And perhaps her family has "buried" her in some way, back where she came from. I find myself pondering various sci-fi possibilities. That some part of her remained in her old life, perhaps in a coma, or that her persona split in two and part still carries on in modern time while the other carries on in M-e? That she was "translated" whole from one world to the other, and so is a "missing person"? (Which would be more likely scenario for her to be yanked out of M-e when her mission is done. But putting down roots makes that less likely.) Hmm. Will have much metaphysical to ponder while going on with the housework. Aargh! Looked at clock and I only have about an hour to do three hours' work! And so, farewell, and looking forward as always to more. Author Reply: Well, I think we're allowed a little emotion - many chapters of this fic so far have been travelling and sight-seeing. ;D 'Japes' are listed in the online dictionary (my huge OED is not in easy reach at the moment) as 'gags' or 'jokes' or 'fun times'. I shall check my OED because in everyday usage it has more the meaning of 'fun times' that usually involve pranks and/or high jinks. So playing a light-hearted trick on someone, or having a bit of boisterous fun that may end in disaster but everyone can laugh about it - so the kind of thing young hobbits may well do quite a bit of, basically. lol at you pondering on the metaphysical dilemma of Penny while you dust! Ah, well, you can't say I don't give you something to think about. ;D Thanks for taking time out to review - glad you enjoyed this chapter. :)

harrowcat	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/18/2006
Oh wow Penny! That was a truly impassioned speech on the futility of war. And I am so glad that she and Halladan are still communicating Author Reply: Thanks. I don't know that Penny sees all war as futile - after all she does mention that sometimes you HAVE to fight (such as they had to against Sauron, or against Morgoth before him), and even in modern times such things have been known. That said, she is making it clear that for all she has not lived through war herself, she understands its brutality and horror to a certain extent and that in modern times we have seen a huge amount of it, including wars that did not serve a 'greater good' or 'higher purpose' - the First World War being one of those since it quickly became a bloody quagmire (and of course the consequences were far-reaching given the lead, directly, to the Second World War thanks to the reparations German was forced to pay, etc, etc). So it was more an example of how some wars can be futile (and all wars horrific), if you see what I mean.

Joana	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/17/2006
Uau, this fiction got me hooked! :D I must admit I didn't start reading it from the beginning, but at certain point I couldn't stop and read one chapter after another. Some chapters were amusing and hilarious, others were serious and thought provoking... sometimes I don't like reading about characters created by the author but this was definitly not the case! I love Halladan (and I'm sure Penny does too cough - sorry, I'm silly when it comes to romance), Rhimlath, Istdor, etc. and even Sidhwen. I don't think there was a part in the story I didn't enjoy, honestly. Sorry I'm not good at writing reviews (there were many things I wanted to say but which I can't remember now) but I still wanted to make an effort because I think you deserve more than simply: "Go on! It's very good! Please post next chapter tomorrow!" And never apologize for writing large chapters - those are great and I hope there are many more to come. :) Author Reply: Thank you so much for taking time out to review. I'm thrilled that you have enjoyed it all the way through - and it's quite some undertaking to read it all in one go these days given how long it's all getting, so kudos to you for that! :)

Pearl Took	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/16/2006
This really is such a masterpiece, Boz. A story with much more depth than many fanfic pieces. Thank you so much :) Author Reply: Thank you. I am very pleased you think so. :)

Mopsy	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/16/2006
Absolutely extraordinary...the sheer depth of this fic is amazing. From the coffin dream to the war-talk...then the chat with Gandalf. All linked together by little moments of fun, like the boar story, and hobbit songs. I really like Celebdor and Mireth, and I love the way you can infuse so much personality into even the minor characters like Faelon, Meresel and co. And the wise in this story really ARE wise - I love the thing Gandalf said to Penny about not letting fear prevent her from choosing happiness. And I'm really anxious about her decision - I'm hopeful about Halladan, that he's healing already and falling in love with her - but even if that happens, where will they live? Author Reply: Thank you. :) The minor characters have a habit of running away with me (witness Rhimlath has being a classic example). I am always worried they'll come over as flat since it's rare I have any kind of advance idea of their characters, their personalities, and yet as I start to write they take up a voice in my head, an attitude and they write themselves a lot of the time. Thank you for your comment about the wise. I get very nervous writing Gandalf, Galadriel, et al, because I worry I cannot truly do them justice precisely in those terms of wisdom and insight - I procrastinated over the Galadriel chapter in Lothlorien for ages for exactly those reasons. lol

el_esteleth	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/16/2006
bounces and grins Yay!!! A new Penny chapter. :D I greatly enjoyed this chapter. I think that you handled the things between Halladan and Penny and the things between Penny and Gandalf very well. I agree with Penny's assessment of her situation with Halladan that she's helping him by getting him involved in things, distracting him from difficult memories, etc. I think you've done a very good job with the emotional aspects of such profound trauma. I really admire you for attempting anything of the sort at all. I honestly don't remember if I got involved in the discussion about PTSD at the end of the last chapter, but I did read most everything that was posted. I think you've done very well with portraying something that's difficult to put into words. I was really pleased that Penny had the chance to talk to Gandalf about whether or not she'd stay in Middle Earth or not. I think that was a very important conversation between them, and a good thing for Penny to realize--that she needed to live her life as if she'd always be there. Honestly, that's what we do every day anyway. Penny's just had a very real representation of how random and chaotic life can be. From one day to the next we really don't know if we're going to still be around. So basically it's a philosophy of plan for tomorrow, live for today. I think you do a very admirable job of bringing things like that into stories. Thank you for sharing your stories with us. I really like reading them because there's always something in every chapter that provokes thought. Thank you again. hugs Es. Author Reply: Thank you. :) I'm glad you feel I managed to resolve things with Halladan and Penny and get their friendship moving, as it were. They've 'found their level' with each other, I think, and their frienship can only strengthen from this point on. She's had to live her life as if she was staying here - in that she has not allowed herself to consider she could disappear in a puff of blue smoke at any minute since she would have gone crazy if she had that constantly in her head - but now she can do so with the (relatively) sure knowledge that she is not lying to herself or ignoring a huge 'what if..?' or 'but' in doing so. That can only be a positive thing. :)

Kitty	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/16/2006
It is so very sweet of all of them to distract Penny so careful from the alley where it happened. And it's good to know the story they told her wasn't only at the expense of Halladan, but of Celebdor's as well. At the moment I feel so protective of Halladan. Poor Penny, it was probably not easy to tell them just how bad the men in our days truly are, how many wars they fought - and still fight - for petty reasons. One wonders what they think of that - they fought so long against Sauron to get peace at last, and then the races of men turn against each other. And the terribly losses of WWI and WWII are nearly unimaginable even for us - how much more difficult is it for the elves to understand? The more so as they still fought man against man, not with the modern weapons of mass destruction? On the other hand, maybe Halladan now can understand better that Penny knows of what she talks and that she has enough knowledge to be right - he has to talk with someone. Maybe their conversation in the night was a little beginning, even if it was not much. And I am glad Penny and Halladan are spending so much time with each other. And this time not so much because I hope they come to love each other, but because I have somehow the feeling maybe Penny will be in the end the one to whom he is able to open up, as she will understand even though she herself never witnessed war. I truly love the way they look after each other and how each tries to help the other with his/her problems. Finally Penny had her talk with Gandalf, too. It was about time, though it is understandable she feared his answers as much as she wanted them. Hm, so she will probably stay in Middle-earth? Good. I think Gandalf is right - she belongs there, is in spite of everything that is burdening her more happy than in our time. The bit about Saruman was interesting. I hadn't seen it this way before, but you are probably right - only after they found the original Elendilmir they could truly understand how far Saruman's treachery reached, though they must've known he had betrayed them for some time already. That was a thought-provoking chapter, Boz, and wonderful done. Author Reply: I think on some level they would not be surprised and also utterly appalled and shocked at what she has told them. And she has made it clear it is not the worst of it by a long chalk when she referred to WWII and the general bloodiness of the last century. They're shocked and yet they know what she has described is only the beginning. I think she may talk more of this to some of them, though I may not write it or write it in detail. There are many long nights ahead to be filled with talk and chatter and I do not doubt that the subject will come up again, probably more than once. On the other hand, maybe Halladan now can understand better that Penny knows of what she talks and that she has enough knowledge to be right - he has* to talk with someone.* Exactly, and their talk in the night is almost like a meeting in the middle - an acceptance that she knows his secret and he's accepting of it and will just have to get over being uncomfortable about it. Knowing that she has understanding of the processes, of what causes it and is not judgemental in the least will help will all of that. The bit about Saruman was interesting. I hadn't seen it this way before, but you are probably right - only after they found the original Elendilmir they could truly understand how far Saruman's treachery reached, though they must've known he had betrayed them for some time already. Oh, I think they did, but not even Gandalf realised how far he had gone and how long before. UT is very clear on that - which is why I love it so, for all the depth it feeds back into LOTR. The discovery of the Elendilmir and the locket for the Ring were truly shocking because of all the implications it held. Thank you for taking time out to comment and review - much appreciated. :)

Inglor	Reviewed Chapter: 34 on 7/16/2006
The scene where she was telling about WWI and II has joined the "Balrog" scene in my head. The way you capture and communicate the shock and awe of the Lords and Ladies... It is like I am sitting there next to Penny, not really sharing her emotions, but able to feel that what she said has such a profound and disconcerting effect. And she isn't even telling them the truly nasty stuff. She is sheilding them. This is gratifying in a way that I have rarely felt while reading. Like looking at a painting or sculpture and wanting to thank the artist because it is so beautiful. Reading this is such a singular experience. Letting me visit ME in such a personal way. You have written things so differently than I would have but very closely to how I (and anyone who is honest with themselves) would have acted had I been in her place. I know I gush everytime I review but I can't help but say what a work of art this is. I don't really care what Penny does next, just as long as you let us read it. Author Reply: Thank you for letting know your response to this chapter, and I am so very pleased that you have felt like you are there with Penny, can understand if not sympathise with her reactions and thought processes. It means a lot - thank you. :)

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