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Truce by meckinock | 20 Review(s) |
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Agape4Gondor | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 4/23/2008 |
I've read all the chapters... just haven't had as much time as I'd like for putting up reviews... however, this tale is well worth taking a moment. I can well imagine Denethor's horror when contemplating what the consequences would be if the enemy was close and Thorongil made a noise. Yikes! I love that he praised the boy. Even if it came because of guilt. His pride not too strong to see the error of his 'hostile' attitude with the boy. His droll response to Turgon was hysterical. 'I knew I could count on you.' Turgon's 'leading' Denethor to 'use' the weight of his title to get them to Minas Tirith was much needed, as much as he's quite the dolt! :-) Oops - Turgon - not Denethor! I very much like that Thorongil taught his men the ways of healing, but I'm glad Denethor noted it and put the lesson aside for future perusal. As he listened and watched and wondered, a 'lump of worry' grew in my own heart! And the phrase 'startled pigeons' and that whole paragraph was profoundly upsetting! Great writing there! For him to finally decide he had been a fool was difficult to read. Cut yourself some slack, Denethor... the man fooled your father too! And I love Denethor's assessment of the lords and princes of Gondor! Great chapter - all the way around!!! Author Reply: Hi, Agape, Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review. I know your time is limited and you've got your own stories that need your attention. It's always great to hear the lines or scenes that you especially enjoyed. I'm really glad you're enjoying the story. Thanks so much. | |
Larner | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 4/6/2008 |
He'd BEST return that ring, and he has too good an appreciation, I think, for what it stands for. Well, now he knows! As for Turgon--he's a sly one, isn't he? Author Reply: Turgon's a survivor. And Denethor above all wants to prove he's more noble than Thorongil - that alone will keep him fairly honest. | |
Nilmandra | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 3/31/2008 |
Meckinock, you'll have to forgive me for waiting for this chapter for apparently months after it has been up. I thought we were waiting for chapter 3. My bad. Oh well, a treat for me, though as I get two chapters in one day. I like your Denethor - he is practical, cunning and very very smart. Not abusive, not an idiot, not insane. And this feels masculine to me, as how I imagine men would handle the situation. There is emotion - this is a captain who is worth dying for, after all - but it isn't smothering. I love Denethor's assessment 'He will live' - that is great. And I particularly like how Denethor is working out who Thorongil might be. The ring, not a piece of jewelry but an heirloom. The pieces of the puzzle were forming a picture he did not much like - a secret, ancient ring carried by a wandering mercenary from the North, a mercenary who looked like a Dúnadan, spoke like an Elf, and knew Númenorean history as well as he did. Denethor is wise to bring Thorongil with him on the ship, to show him the respect and courtesy he would a kinsman - a brother even - for to do less is obvious. Hold your friends close, your enemies closer! And Turgon... well, he will become a great politician. Author Reply: LOL, it's like having Christmas twice or something. Or not.... I'm glad you like Denethor. The dude is really growing on me, too. LOL about keeping your enemies closer- that is exactly Denethor's thought! And yeah to Turgon the politician LOL. | |
obsidianj | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 1/4/2008 |
Hurrah, you updated. And I didn't even have the time to read it until now. This is another marvelous chapter. I love the way you describe Denethor. A very complex character who I come to like and be repelled off at the same time. He has all the characteristics to be a beloved leader like Thorongil, at least he knows in theory what he should do, but his character flaws put obstacles in the way, and he ends up less than he could be. So, he stands between Thorongil and Turgon as the two extremes of "leaders" and can't decide to be like either of them. His innate honor and feeling of duty stand in the way of being as shallow as Turgon, but he can't bring himself to go the extra mile to be like Thorongil. And he knows it, which makes him feel less than charitable toward Thorongil. I think you made Thorongil and Turgon the perfect foil for different aspects of Denethor's personality. In this chapter Thorongil just had to "be" there doing nothing, to be a thorn in Denethor's side and make him uncomfortable Author Reply: Gosh, I'm sorry, I don't know how I missed the alert for this. Thanks so much for reviewing! I've been having such a good time delving into Denethor's psyche, and it's really wonderful to hear from someone else who enjoys dissecting our flawed hero. I like your observation that Turgon and Aragorn are opposites appealing to Denethor's "good" and "bad" side. | |
Cairistiona | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 1/3/2008 |
I'm so glad you're working on this story again! And that I finally found the time to start reading it. What can I say, it's vintage meckinock. :) Denethor is not exactly a character I'm drawn to, but I'm loving the complexity you've given him. He's part noble, part knave, and inarguably human in all his strengths and weaknesses. I can see so many of the seeds that will eventually lead to his downfall being planted in this story. I get such a sense of melancholy as I read him, that forlorn feeling of "if only he'd had the strength to overcome his weaknesses, how might his fate have changed" . . . but of course, his doom is before him and unless you go completely AU, all we can do is watch the trainwreck unfold. And you are certainly guiding said train in a very believable and entertaining fashion. And then there's Turgin . . . oh, what an annoying creep! But what a realistic creep. As much as I dislike him, he keeps pulling reluctant laughter out of me. He reminds me of some of the nasty officers in Bernard Cornwell's Richard Sharpe books (yeah, I know . . . there she goes on and on about Sharpe again, but you really ought to read one, since your writing is so reminiscent of his!). Okay, sorry, got a little off track there . . . excellent story, glad you're back and can't wait to read more. ;) cairistiona Author Reply: Hey, I'll have you know I watched "Sharpe's Rangers" and "Sharpe's Siege" over the holidays! I hope yours were enjoyable. I guess you must be recovered from them, anyway, if you're finding time to read fanfiction I could go on and on about Denethor (and have, I'm embarrassed to say, in previous review replies). I'm glad you found him compelling and interesting. And Turgon is, yes, a creep, but I try to make him an entertaining one :-) Thanks for reading and reviewing. I'm glad you're enjoying the story. I hope to update much quicker this time...but I always say that. I have faith that 2008 will be a better year. | |
Casso | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/21/2007 |
OK, OK, I know i should have read this story on this site and not over at that other one, and then when i left a review i would have seen Rays Dog's reworking of this chapter (got to luv that dog.) Anyway here's the review I left at that other site - wouldn't want you to miss it. As usual you have managed to inflict serious harm on Aragorn. I love it. (is that a bit sick) I hope the wrist and collar bone aren't his sword arm, he'll need that to run something sharp thru Denethor. Poor Denethor just can't help himself can he, what a shame he won't just aknowledge Aragorn as the King and both of them could get on with saving Gondor et al. He would have had a much more pleasant life I'm sure. Love seeing new stuff from you. Keep writing. Author Reply: Hi, Casso, Listen, you read the story on any site you want, and leave a review anyplace you want, or no place, whatever you want. Leaving one in two places is above and beyond the call of duty, bless your heart. I'm very happy to hear you're enjoying the story, though. Actually I did see the comment over on HASA and was just thrilled, but it's been so long since I received a comment over there I couldn't figure out how to reply - I was still working out whether I had to just leave a new comment for my own story to acknowledge a commment someone else left when you left this review here and spared me the agony (well, not really since someone else left a comment on the same site that I still want to acknowledge). Denethor's limitations are intriguing to think about. Acknowledging Aragorn as king would defy his nature, I think. Thanks so much for reviewing (twice!) And I luv that dog, too :-) | |
Dot | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/21/2007 |
That opening was so tense! I was getting very worried about what might be heading towards them and was nearly as relieved as Denethor when it turned out to be Turgon & co. I suppose at least Denethor can be proud of the fact that his men know how to move quickly and quietly... I loved that moment when they approached : the faint, unavoidable noises of movement – the dull jingle of a bridle, the creak of leather; the clink of a scabbard against a stirrup. Very atmospheric! Cirion is an interesting character. At times he seems like just a petrified boy and is clearly very attached to Thorongil but he must possess a lot of courage and presence of mind if he managed to cut the rope, get the slave on the horse and bring the lads back to where Thorongil fell. I suspect that might be inner strength honed by Thorongil, hence the attachment. I can understand Denethor asking him why he’d disappeared, though – I’d probably have asked the same! Now Turgon, he has no shame. Luckily Denethor can see through him even though he has to put up with him! Of course, seeing Turgon as he is and knowing that Turgon cheerfully accepts and embraces his own faults could come in useful for Denethor. I can really feel Denethor’s unease as he becomes conscious of how many people are around when he’s still wearing Thorongil’s ring. He’s after getting himself into a situation now that he can’t get out of. He strikes me as someone who has a pretty good heart but whose pride and insecurities mean he gets deeper into situations than he intends rather than backing away. In fact, it’s probably the awareness that he’s doing something wrong that makes him feel worse so he has to find someone else to blame rather than himself. For some reason I really liked the fact that Thorongil has trained his men in healing. He’s obviously generous with his skills - and look how handy it’s come in. Of course, another reason for his popularity isn’t exactly going to go down well with Denethor. Though Denethor is probably too busy trying to piece the mystery together. The pieces of the puzzle were forming a picture he did not much like - a secret, ancient ring carried by a wandering mercenary from the North, a mercenary who looked like a Dúnadan, spoke like an Elf, and knew Númenorean history as well as he did. Oh boy. What a pity the ring wasn’t found by someone a lot more dense than Denethor. I can’t wait to see where this goes. Still, at least the stories and legends are more or less just that to the people of Gondor – I mean, who’d ever expect the king to turn up in their time? Oh, before I forget – this line was fantastic: fragments of ancient tales, long-dismissed and half-forgotten, rushed like startled pigeons to flutter against the walls of his mind. What a wonderful description. Though he derived no pleasure from seeing Thorongil indisposed, he could not help but note that the poppy would dull Thorongil’s memory of the journey, permitting, perhaps, a reconstructed version of events to be impressed upon him, should that be required later. Well! It’s fascinating to see how his mind works – very cunning, every option possible covered, just incase. And yet it all sounds so logical. I nearly found myself nodding along!! whose berths were not already spoken for by holiday travelers or holiday geese. ROTFL! Sorry, but that did make me laugh… I did feel quite sorry for Denethor as he watches the lights of the farmhouses from the boat. That mountain of fire is quite a burden for him to bear. He’s so constantly aware of its presence and it’s almost as though he can’t be completely free as long as it’s there. In a way he reminds me of Aragorn in how he carries this weight that dictates his choices and in a way limits his freedom. I though the little scene between Denethor and Turgon on the boat was interesting. Even as they bicker, Denethor is sharing his flask of brandy. He and Turgon are clearly closer than Denethor might admit. Or perhaps he’s just keeping Turgon close. Now there’s a person you’d rather was on your side than against you. Denethor seems very self-aware too. He knows he leads by respect. And there’s nothing wrong with that – undoubtedly he has many of the qualities of a good leader. But it’s a rare man who can lead by love. Turgon’s thoughts are also intriguing. I can see where he’s coming from, just as I can see why he doesn’t understand Denethor. It shows too why their king will be someone who not only comes from a humble, albeit noble, background but who, after being protected and nurtured, chooses to go and spent his life among Men, learning from them, fighting alongside them and then fighting for them. And that’s why Denethor might not be wrong about why they don’t have a king yet but he’s wrong about what a king will be. It must be odd waiting for something to happen that you don’t really believe ever will and yet feeling that little prickling of fear that perhaps it might. And then this mysterious stranger arrives with a hidden heirloom, a gift for gaining the love of those he leads and with the shadows of legend in his wake. Ok, I just realised I was rambling again instead of reviewing. Well, I really enjoyed it! And I was thrilled to see you posting again. I can’t wait for more but I’ll try and sit here patiently and let the poking and prodding up to other people… :-) Author Reply: Denethor's life would have been so perfect if Thorongil hadn't come along, wouldn't it? He had it all worked out. I think he also had a messiah complex, one that couldn't perceive of anyone but him as the savior of Gondor. Denethor never would have been able to step out of his role like Aragorn did, forsaking the Ring and playing the part of bait while a mere hobbit saved the world. And so, gifted and talented and genuinely, deeply committed to the destruction of Mordor, he was doomed to fail from the beginning. And there was something of a martyr complex there, too, I think, so that he would have not necessarily minded that - so long as he led the resistance, he could have gone down confident that everything had been done. Constrained by his conviction that it's his personal destiny to lead Gondor in its darkest hour, and his insight that it's a doomed mission, he's constitutionally incapable of imagining a King succeeding where he would fail. I wonder how much of Denethor's downfall Tolkien would have attributed to his character flaws and how much to simple destiny. Interesting. But I just realized I'm rambling instead of answering your lovely review! Now twice today I've thanked someone for going above and beyond the call of duty. You really did not need to leave a second review - Yaaaay was plenty. But I thank you so much for it! Turgon is a hoot because I can imbue him with so many annoying qualities - a very healthy entitlement mentality, for one - while sparing him some truly nasty ones - like self-deceit. He's a happy little socialite for the most part. Although I wonder how he'd be if things didn't go quite so well for him. Hmmm....maybe in another story... Whenever I fly at night, over farm country where the lights from the houses are so far apart, separated by acres and acres of blackness, I find myself wondering about the people who live down there. I know it's not Thanksgiving where you are, Dot, but you've given me one more thing to be thankful for today. | |
phyloxena | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/19/2007 |
Poor Denethor. I love the story and the way you treat characters. Too smart for everyone's good Denethor, perfect but immobilized Thorongil, and Turgon, too. I cannot imagine Denethor thirty years later tolerating Turgon, but he(Turgon) will, probably, learn to behave by the time. "Mithrandir's pet project" theory was very close :) I cannot believe Denethor almost spilled his suspicion. Author Reply: Hi, Phyloxena, I'm so glad to hear you're enjoying the story. "Too smart for everyone's good Denethor" indeed! I think he finds Turgon distasteful but useful, as well as unavoidable (being married to his sister). I think you're right that he'll be less tolerant of his excesses in the future - he's too good a leader to be snowed by a sycophant like Turgon (as many are). Unfortunately at the moment he needs him. He might need him still more before this is over :-) | |
The Karenator | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/19/2007 |
The PI tapped his muddy boot with the tankard he'd nearly emptied while he listened to the boy's disjointed story. A dirt clod as big as Gomer Pyle's head crumbled when it hit the floor. He glanced between his knees to the wide planks where the lumps were half-buried in powder puffs of dust and hardened food bits, then wondered if Mr. Clean could erase that. Finally he turned his eyes back up to the scrawny kid. "How did you come by this information?" Shoulders no wider than a girl's picked at the boy's thin shirt like a clothes hanger hooked to the bottom of his skull. The knobs above his arms jerked upward in a shrug. "I know this guy down at Pelargir that hauls cargo for UPS--the Unhappy Pelargir Servant Company. He told me." Johnny Halbarad beckoned the buxom brunette waiting tables with a flick of his hand. She sashayed over, rocked out an ample hip, then planted a hand with glittery blue nails that made her look like a hawk with Cover Girl stock. "Hi, my name is Loretta. What lynn I do for you?" When she laughed, her eyes closed up tighter than Hollywood during a writer's strike. "Get it. Loretta Lynn." The PI snorted and pushed his mug across the table toward her. "Yeah, sweetheart. And my name is Johnny. How about getting me another draft?" She howled with glee. "You're pulling my leg!" She snatched up the empty tankard and wobbled off through the smoky blue haze still chuckling to herself. "Johnny!" she said so loud half the room turned to see who she was calling. "So Johnny, will that be cash?" She shook from behind at her own joke, like a double-wide with a bad wheel. The PI slapped the gaping kid on the front of his chest to break the wiggling-hip-induced trance that held him tighter than a dime store garter. "Start from the beginning. Tell me what this UPS guy told you." "Okay, okay," the kid said. He wiped the drool from his lips on the arm of his dirty shirt. The PI didn't know if he could trust the kid or not. He hoped for the boss's sake the kid wasn't running one of those Gondorian Fishnet scams. Gondorians? Distant kin? That made the PI spit further than Laura Ingalls when she won her famous expectorating contest with Nelly. The guys over in Gondor thought they were tough. He'd heard all about them. Especially that kid of the Steward. Denny, the thorn. Yeah, that was his name. The guy had a reputation that preceded him like British Sterling on an adolescent runt. Speaking of peewees, he leveled his gaze on the kid like Steve Austin zooming in on a target. The kid leaned forward. "So this is what I heard, but I can't swear how much of it ain't been doctored up like a patient of Marcus Welby. That man you wanted to know about, the shirt guy that's related to the bad weather guy, Arrow Gore...." "Aragorn," the PI said. "But that's not the name he's going by. If I ever hear you say that name again, I'll knock you into outer space so fast, you'll pass the Enterprise like it's standing still. It's Thorongil. His name is Thorongil." The kid pulled one side of his lip up in an Elvis sneer while he digested this threat like a fried banana sandwich. "I like Arrow better than The Wrong Deal. I mean, what does this guy do? Sell broken swords or something?" Halbarad massaged the bridge of his nose where the throbbing went as fast as Lindsay Lohan's jail time. "Just tell me, okay?" "So," the boy said again, "this guy I know tells me this bunch of soldiers come riding up with this buckboard wagon with The Wrong Deal guy laid out on flour sacks like Dolly Madison waiting for her old man. He's pretty beat up. The Wrong Deal not Dolly's husband. He's got like this broken leg or something and he's bandaged up like The Mummy. He overhears this guy from Gondor tell somebody else from Gondor that The Mummy ain't gonna die, but he might wish he had before they got through jostling him all over the lower forty." The PI held up his hand. "Wait! Who were the guys from Gondor?" Hanger-shoulders bent again like flimsy wire. "This guy I know said he thought one of the Gondorians was the son of the kingpin..." "Stop!" Halbarad felt his face burn hotter than a Farrah Fawcett poster. "Gondor has no kingpin! Gondor needs no kingpin!" "Then one of the guys was the son of the..." "Steward." "The Steward. Fine. Can I get on with my story?" The PI nodded. "Okay, so this guy I know is listening to the son of the Steward and some other guy this guy I know thought might be his brother or brother-in-law or something, because they fussed more than Wally and the Beav. They had to be family. The family guy says to the Steward guy that he, the Steward guy, ought to dump The Wrong Deal on a slow boat to Mordor, then do a Jetson's back to Minas Tirith so he could spread the word that he beat back the Narcs single-handed. But the Steward guy said he couldn't do that because then it would look like he was trying to pull a fast one, sort of like that Harry Mudd guy who tried to pass off those women as babes when they were really just Jell-o poppers. He told the family guy that he was remarkably too subtitled to be to a courier." The kid gulped from his tankard, then thumped it back on the table. "I guess that meant he could read the family guy like the TV Guide." The PI scratched his head. "Go on." "Okay," the kid said then looked over his shoulder. "Ain't Loretta going to bring us a couple of more brews?" Loretta, Halbarad noted, was now singing karaoke with some guys wearing rhinestone shirts and cowboy hats. "In a minute," he said. "Keep going." "Well, this guy I know then got a job on this boat this other guy was taking up to Minas Tirith. The Steward guy and the family guy flashed some change in the captain's face and got them and The Wrong Deal a room on it. So this guy I know is now watching them real close because he thinks there's something stranger about them than Rod Sterling on the tea cup ride at Disney." The kid leaned in again as if to tell the PI something he didn't want anybody else's ears scooping up. "This guy I know saw the Steward guy looking at this ring before the boat shoved off. It was some kind of weird ring with two snakes wrapped around a corn dog and," he said, "it had glowing eyes." A lump the size of The Rock's biceps knotted in Halbarad's stomach, bounced up like the little white ball on 'Sing Along with Mitch' to clobber him in the brain. He ran his hand over his face to try and catch it before he lost an eye. "What color? What color were the stones?" After digging in his greasy hair for a few seconds, the kid picked at his fingernail. "Green, I think. Yeah, green. It was like all glowing and stuff." The kid locked eyeball to eyeball with Halbarad for an instant, then went on. "So when this guy I know got offered a gig on the boat, he took it. Then he watched the Steward guy and the family guy and kept an eye out for The Wrong Deal. "Then, on the boat, he heard the Steward guy and the family guy talking. The Steward guy must be planning some sort of boxing tournament or something because he's tired of looking for Don King. He said if King was going to come, he could have showed up in the last thousand years, but he ain't. But, he says, everybody in Gondor is still laying down bets because they think he's going to turn up and put his antenna on top of the sheet on the White Tower. I guess it's because they got sheets up there that they call it the White Tower. Maybe it's the laundry mat. So anyway, the family guy says his family has been working on getting in a Deer for all those years and he'd hate it if Don King shows up with boxing and people stop going to tractor pulls. Then the Steward guy said he was glad to hear that because he might need the family guy's low loader too somewhere down the road. When the family guy asked why the Steward guy might need his low loader, the Steward guy said something had happened to his duel fenders and he was going to have to answer for it." The kid fell silent. Halbarad's mouth felt as dry as Chad and Jeremy's record sells. Loretta warbled into her third tune with the rhinestone cowboys. She was as hopeless as a Monkees reunion tour. With a sigh, he prodded the boy to talk again. "What else?" "That's it," the kid said. "This guy I know is still sneaking around like Maxwell Smart on Dramamine." He grimaced. "He gets a little sick when the floor rocks like Jimi Hendrix at the Fillmore. But he's buttering up some guy named Big Leg so he can sign on with the Gondor guys when they get to Minas Tirith. He's going to send me some e-mails later when he finds out more." "E-mails?" "Yeah," the kid said with a smile he could have sold to Ipana. "They've got this really cool system, you see. When the egg guys leave early every morning to deliver eggs, they pass letters from one egg guy to another all over the country. You got a letter you give them in the morning, it's passed all the way to the ford by afternoon. Get your eggs, get your mail. And nothing don't stop them. Through all kinds of weather too. Them hens keep laying them eggs and the egg guys got to move them. It won't take more than a couple of days to get a letter up here." The PI shook his head. Man, the boss had done it this time. Aragorn had got mixed up with the mob in Gondor and getting help to him depended on a mail system as fragile as Marilyn Monroe's bra strap. That, however, would be least of his worries if the boss found out he was keeping tabs on him. Aragorn would lay his own egg. Ray's Dog Human reviewer: What a good chapter. The dialogue flowed and the imagery was outstanding. You know, I've developed a real fondness for Denethor and even wormy Turgon. They're both such good characters. You've given Denethor a complex personality that makes him sympathetic, and makes him a bit of a heel. He stole Aragorn's ring! Or at least, he borrowed it without permission. And Turgon knows he's a shallow, self-serving twerp, so I can't help but find some humor in his honesty. He might not be the most honorable guy in Minas Tirith, but he has so much personality, I love reading him. This is way too long, so I'll just end it with how I began: What a great chapter. Ray's Dog's human Author Reply: Oh, thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you! Author Reply: You know, Ray's dog outdid himself (Marilyn Monroe's bra straps!) but what really put a lump in my throat was the idea of Halbarad checking up on the boss from afar. God, I love that P.I. Author Reply: And Turgon knows he's a shallow, self-serving twerp, so I can't help but find some humor in his honesty. Yeah, the honesty puts him head and shoulders above most of the shallow, self-serving twerps I know :-) | |
perelleth | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/18/2007 |
Worth the wait! I was sure that you would manage something for Karen's birthday! I have to stop and remind myself from time to time that this is a young Denethor... I think that you have nailed him so well that he sounds and acts as we would expect from bookDenethor, of course! And then there is that almost youthful light-heartedness of his exchanges with Turgon and I have to remmeber that they are two relatively young officers expecting to wield more power in the future and wavering between honour and ambitions and a wounded would-be-usurper. This story is greatly done, from the details -the clink of a scabbard against a stirrup! I really loved that moment with all that imagery, to the intriguing plot line. Now I am wondering how is Denethor to solve up this while keeping his honour intact! :-) Author Reply: Denethor at this point in his life is interesting to examine because the basic elements of his character are in place but they haven't been kindled by 30-odd years of growing despair, personal grief, and the pressure of the Palantir. And almost all of his character traits are admirable, even heroic. He's such a tragic alter ego of Aragorn. | |