About Us News Resources Login Become a member Help Search | |
By The Hands of Another by Estelle | 2 Review(s) |
---|---|
Lady Jaina | Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 10/16/2003 |
This is looking good, I'll read it all when I have the chance! Grr...evil school...nasty teachers...Gol--Okay, I got a little carried away. Great job on the first chapter, I'll finish the whole thing as soon as I get a spare moment. Author Reply: Thank you for the review. I hope you'll like the other chapters :) | |
LKK | Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 9/12/2003 |
Good start! I loved the scene with the butterflies. Very amusing. :-) One piece of constructive criticism offered in friendship -- Your words work to establish setting and mood quite effectively. But every once and a while a very modern word will sneak in, yanking me out of Middle Earth and slamming me back into the 21st Century. For example: when Aragorn calls Legolas a "sleazy elf". The word "sleazy" is jarring because the rest of your language is so appropriate to the world of ME. That criticism aside, though, I'm looking forward to more of this story! Author Reply: Ahh, I know someone will catch that word eventually. LOL! I have no idea how to insult an elf so I threw in a word from the 21st Century. Hehehe. This is my first piece of so-called full length fic and I'm sure I've made a lot of other mistakes along the way. My descriptive skill sucks and I'm seriously trying to work on it. But thanks for your constructive criticism. :) I'll try to make it less modern and more ME. :) | |