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| Twice Blessed by MJ | 4 Review(s) |
|---|---|
| Larner | Reviewed Chapter: 8 on 12/22/2010 |
| I think he answered her pettiness quite well, actually. And I think that, in the same situation, I, too, would prefer the night in the rain by the water rather than to spend it in company with her childish tantrums. She could have done as he did had she tried! | |
| Erulisse (one L) | Reviewed Chapter: 8 on 12/21/2010 |
| As always, your skill as a storyteller comes through with brilliant colors. When I see that I have a chapter (or two) update from you, I try and clear my calendar for an hour's uninterrupted enjoyment. Chapters 7 and 8 were no exception. The relationships are deepening and the reasons for the split between Olorin and his "ex" are also becomming clear. (One small suggestion - when you have the elfling ask about his circlet and his response, you may want to put a link to the earlier story or mention it with a link at the bottom of the chapter in case your reader(s) have not read the prequel.) I can't wait for the next few days of this "short, seven-day journey". I have a feeling that it could turn into one of the longest journeys of Olorin's life. - Erulisse (one L) Author Reply: I'm glad you're enjoying the story (and I really, REALLY hope that darned block will thaw so that I'll finally be able to finish it!). I like your reference to Aránayel as Olorin's "ex" -- it's an amusing way to think of it, though since they never really had a relationship, one has to wonder "ex-what?" :) The idea of a link to the previous story... I'll have to think about it. Since my longer stories are usually all part of a larger story arc, I could wind up with a lot of links like that. I do make sure to mention that it's a sequel, so I hope people will start by reading the previous story. If I get enough requests or comments asking for such clarification, though, I will certainly consider it. Better footnotes and links that long, long recaps of what happened in the previous story! Thanks for the review, and the suggestion! | |
| Aiwen | Reviewed Chapter: 8 on 12/20/2010 |
| Someone more inappropriate for Olorin than a certain female maia would be hard to imagine. The woman is maddening! Author Reply: Maddening. Yes, maddening. And possibly a few stronger descriptions that would blow the PG rating out of the water! | |
| FantasyFan | Reviewed Chapter: 8 on 12/20/2010 |
| There is a discussion of the value of patience, when what you are waiting for is something of worth, immediately followed by an example of the loss of patience, when the thing to be desired will never come without a more direct approach. I'm glad he gave her a dressing-down, and served notice that he is neither her inferior nor there for her comfort, and that she has pushed him as far as she can, indeed further than she should have. Though, when he leaves to sit under the trees in the rain, and he's back to wondering how to deal with her and if he can survive the seven-day trip, I think he's just made a big step forward in dealing with her. She's an emotional bully, and the last thing a bully wants is to be stood up to. Perhaps, as a result, if she can't say something nice, maybe she will not say anything at all. I also loved to see Olorin working here. He's spoken privately to her, urging her to be cooperative, and also to the twins, urging them to be pleasant - the peacemaker at work. Gandalf gets some work done as well, lighting the little fire, and then the larger task of drying the wet goods (and himself). He doesn't notice that the exercise of power makes the crystals of his circlet glow. If anyone needed a last reminder of Eru's favor, it's an obvious one. Author Reply: Do you really think she will say nothing at all? | |