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| In the Hands of the Enemy by meckinock | 10 Review(s) |
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| lindahoyland | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 8/20/2005 |
| I just had to read some more ! Another unexpected twist though I can't say I trust the boy and I wish that Gandalf would find Aragorn as he is obviously in a bad way.One minor quibble as a British reader "pants leg" is jarring to me,I think Tolkien would have used trousers or breeches.To the British ,pants are underwear ! Totally gripping, I can't resist another chapter ! Author Reply: Yikes. Don't want Aragorn caught in his jockey shorts. Thanks. I will fix. | |
| Leaward | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 6/4/2005 |
| I steeled myself and began reading again .. you're such an inspiration and frightening at the same time because you make me feel so inadequate in my own writing. I LOVE the details you manage to think of and describe! "Aragorn cleared his throat. Family and friends had been inspired to call him many things these past weeks. ‘Stubborn Dúnadan’ had been a favorite, of course, along with ‘Arrogant Númenorean.’ Elrohir had been especially proud of ‘Obstinate, stiff-necked, self-absorbed offspring of Arvedui’- LMAO! I love this line, it's one that will stay with me for a while. Author Reply: Thanks, Leaward. I don't feel like much of an inspiration most of the time! I struggle with the details a lot. Sometimes I have to go back over a draft I actually had reservations about the name-calling, so it's good to hear you liked it. | |
| Orophins Dottir | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 1/27/2004 |
| OK, Mangy One, I am back! And here, you thought you were safe! Shining example of elven reviewer picks up her quill: First comment *Elf bows in admiration, salutes Ranger, nibbles at fruit delicately and all without spilling a drop of her ink. Smirks at memory of human klutz and begins to scratch her quill across the page*: Your powers of description are wonderful. I could really see the whole scene before me. *Elf ponders whether, what with decapitation and all that copious blood, this is a good thing. Decides it is. Vivid is good. Despite blood.* Admirable. I am quite jealous of this. Do you have a correspondence course I could take? Also, many nice turnings of phrases: ". . .watching for the signature head cock which would signal that something useful had finally been dredged from the depths of the innkeeper's beleaguered memory." Love that "beleagured memory" idea for Butterbur. What pleases me most here about your writing is this characterization of the boy. I find it most intriguing. You tell me a little and make me want to know more, which is rotten for elven reader but quite a nice thing for a writer to be able to do. Umm, finally: These people are not very tidy, are they? No standards of cleanliness. All that blood and dirt. Are all humans this way? *Laughing hysterically, elf skitters off. By the time Mangy Ranger has loosed her sword "Emily" from her worn scabbard, light-footed elf will be safely back in Taur-E-Ndaedelos. Attending to her laundry.* Humble Scribe to his Majesty Thranduil P. S. As she runs gracefully out of reach of the irate ranger, elf calls back, "Small typo in first line, Fair One? Should it not be "streambed"? Ruffians and rangers do not seem like the sauna types." *Toodles her long fingers at the noble Meckinock and increases her pace. The human appears to be gaining on her. Not good at all.* Author Reply: Figures that the person who had Thranduil slitting his own son's throat would appreciate the decapitation scene! My dear Elf, you do not need lessons in Vivid. As far as tidiness is concerned, it pretty much goes downhill from here. We Rangers do not have much opportunity to bathe, except on rare occasions when we allow ourselves the luxury of our steam beds. | |
| Raquel | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 1/19/2004 |
| Fantastic story! Great plot, great character development and enough twists to leave anyone hooked! But, talking about twists, I have reread your story many times and I still don't understand Aragorn's reference to Rolly's lie about a stone. I missed it. While waiting to ambush Aragorn, Rolly absently picks up another round stone. But later, I saw no description or reference to him discarding the stone or Aragorn inquiring about it. So, when Aragorn finally understands that Rolly is behind the whole mess and tell Rolly that he never trusted him fully because he lied about the stone... This is driving me nuts! Please, tell me what I missed (or where). By the way, any chance you will continue this story? Halbarad is my new hero, thanks to you. | |
| grumpy | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| wow this story just keeps getting better and better, last chapter was great. Amazing the amount of weapons on Aragorn, and a few the boy didn't get. Reading so far about the boy i wouldn't trust him, but then Aragorn has not read this. I love some of the names the Strider has picked up, the best being "Obstinate, Stiff-necked, self-absorbed. . ." And if wasn't bad enough that it was raining now it is snowing. Hate the white stuff myself. Really looking forward to more Author Reply: Thanks, now you've given me a challenge - I can't let you down! Aragorn does have a lot of weapons, but since he has no stereo equipment he has to make up for it somehow. I'm glad you enjoyed the, uh, names he recalled having heard a time or two - I'm sure they were meant very affectionately, though... Never fear - tomorrow will be bright and sunny! | |
| fliewatuet | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| That battlefield must have been a gruesome sight indeed. Rolly seems like a tough fellow to me, in spite of his tender age. His 'cleaning up' was quite efficient, and maybe even mercyful given Kergelen's pityful state. Aragorn, as always, was marvellous! Even tired, wet, wounded and barely conscious he is a most formidable warrior. Pretending to be unconscious so as to trick Rolly was no small feat. Neither was their march to find at least some semblance of shelter. But you did not spare them aught! After fighting a battle (BTW will you give us some more details about that battle Aragorn and Halbarad fought prior to the events of your story?), travelling injured in the constant rain, being ambushed and knocked out, you have to add snow to Aragorn's misery? (Okay, I should not complain ...) But he at least was granted a warming fire. As far as Rolly is concerned, I still don't know where to place him. He did neither try to tie Aragorn's hands nor try to kill him, but I am still not sure that he is to be completely trusted. He did knock out Aragorn, after all. Finally, I loved that Gandalf-Butterbur scene! Butterbur groping for an answer to Gandalf's question, his digression and Gandalf trying to turn his focus back on topic! Wonderful! Author Reply: Thanks, oh you master of driving Aragorn past the brink of exhaustion (At least I haven't given him broken ribs yet). I'm actually not sure at what point he regained consciousness - I think the sternal rub might have had something to do with it. References to the battle will continue to occur, since something happened there which really shook Aragorn. Aragorn isn't sure Rolly should be trusted, either... Glad you enjoyed Butterbur's cameo. There will be more attempts at comic relief to come! | |
| daw the minstrel | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| This is just so well written that I can't get over it. There's enough description of setting to give a real physical sense of the place, but not so much that it gets tedious. There are real characters and a well controlled switching between their perspectives. There is a plot. I want to know what happens! And there is the honesty it takes to describe the deaths of the thieves. I can't wait for more. Author Reply: Thanks for the extremely gracious comments, I'm thrilled you think I succeeded in striking a balance - this was a real challenge for me, especially since I wrote parts of the story at different times. I had to take a six-month break for a job transfer when I was about halfway done and I have since gone back and done a lot of editing, because some parts I wrote earlier went ON AND ON AND ON about the scenery (including Chapter 3, which was the first chaper I wrote)... Peter Jackson's comments about why he cut the scenes he eventually re-inserted into the FOTR extended edition were also instructive - the message I got was - KEEP THE STORY MOVING. Perspective was also tricky - despite the fact that every writer's bible dictates against it, I actually enjoy shifting perspective, but making sure the transitions were clear and not too distracting continues to give me migraines - thanks for the reassurance. | |
| Nilmandra | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| Friend or foe is the question, isn't it? This 'boy' just cruelly killed in cold blood; has lied and seems to continue to do so, and yet has also been bested by the ranger rather unexpectedly....but when he could finish Strider off, he does not do so. Which rather leads me to believe there is danger waiting ahead that he is leading Strider into.... Nice suspense, nice writing... Author Reply: Thanks - Aragorn's weakness is that even if he knows the boy has been corrupted by bad company, he will still see something in him worth saving - is he right? | |
| The Karenator | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| I'm beginning to think this boy is the one that needs watching. We already know he was with the outlaws, but then he lied to Aragorn about Aragorn's head injury. I want to jump to conclusions and decide who he is, but in order not to make a complete fool of myself, I'll wait...and try to be patient. I don't think Aragorn trust him at all. I should hope not anyway. The kid is certainly a mysterious sort....he puts up a good front though. I doubt he would want to meet Gandalf, but I am hoping that the wizard goes after Aragron. Your characterizations remain strong and the plot thickens. I loved the descriptions of Butterbur. This is such a great line..."In all the long years he’d known Barley, he’d never been able to decide if his memory lapses were a genuine character trait or merely the useful affectation of a career bartender." I'm glad you're updating at a good rate. I just hate being left in the dark! :>) I'm looking forward to the next chapter. Good show, meckinock. :>) Karen Author Reply: You are such a fanatastic reviewer - I am unworthy! Gandalf will indeed be going after Aragorn - with a little help. Glad you liked the portrayal of Butterbur - he is such a teddy bear - I never envisioned writing him but he is just so easy to write... The story is supposedly finished at 15 chapters (at least I thought so before I started posting it); I intend to keep posting on Tues-Thurs-Sat-Sun, unless I decide to change something too drastically (as it is, I am unexpectedly finding myself spending six hours a day changing happys to glads). | |
| Elemmire | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| I loved this bit - Rocks. Rocks poking into his ribcage. He buried his head further beneath the blanket. Dampness seeping into his trousers. Outside, he finally conceded with dismay. ;), Elemmire Author Reply: This is why I can never ever post as I go (immnse admiration for those of you who can!) I have had this chapter pretty much ready to go for two months but was never totally happy with it; I added this sequence five minutes before I hit the "publish" button... Glad you enjoyed it! | |