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A Perilous Journey to Lorien by LadyJaina | 2 Review(s) |
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periannore | Reviewed Chapter: 2 on 5/31/2022 |
This chapter begins with your apt characterization of Legolas acting his elvish age, being impulsive like Pippin. What would thranduil say about his son deliberately making himself a target with 5 enemies and three arrows? Later you refer to the uninjured Legolas's merriment. Tolkien established the elves Merriment early on. I was sorry he didn't work it more into the dialogue as the trilogy continued instead of leaving most of the levity to the hobbits. When I have these thoughts I feel even more compassion for Tolkien who wished he could have made the trilogy way, way, longer. You use Tolkien's setting as you quoted it as a springboard and augmented it with phrases like: Young birches grew sparsely and Legolas used them like great walking staffs, letting them brace him as he made his way down., which allow us to visualize the setting in more detail. Nice writing. Legolas's world of hurt is just beginning. In this chapter it's reassuring that Gimli, Aragorn and Boromir show such sincere concern for him. You are so patient to research your story so thoroughly. | |
Lindelea | Reviewed Chapter: 2 on 3/11/2021 |
Again, nice job of gap-filling and building on the foundation of the original text. (Am I going to say that with every chapter? Please bear with me if I am repetitive.) I would be beside myself with worry about Legolas if you hadn't said something in the introductory part about will not affect canon beyond Lothlórien. Some of my hobbits are a bit more familiar with arrows and archery than yours, I think. (I write my Tooks as archers, an echo of the hobbit archers who went off to fight for the King against Angmar. When I first started writing fanfic, I imagined 100 Tookish archers marching to the Battle of Bywater, and now I don't know if that was in the original or if I extrapolated it from Farmer Cotton talking about the Tooks hunting and shooting ruffians for prowling and stealing. I'll have to go back and look that up. Ironically, perhaps, I write Pippin as a terrible shot with a bow but having good aim when throwing stones.) I find myself wondering when the scene with the mithril shirt happens. "Here's a pretty hobbit-skin to wrap an elven-princeling in." Nice touch, Gimli wondering at Aragorn's fall-back language when he's stressed. Makes perfect sense, with him being raised in Elrond's house, I should think? I forgot to mention, when Legolas smirked, I imagined he was thinking of the irony of scavenging the orcs' fallen arrows and shooting their weapons back at them with deadlier effect. So it will be interesting to find out more about that smirk. I'm so glad you provide translations for those of us who aren't familiar with JRRT's languages. His inventions are amazing - but so many of the words just refuse to take up residence in my brain. | |