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| Runaway by Lindelea | 3 Review(s) |
|---|---|
| FantasyFan | Reviewed Chapter: 30 on 1/11/2004 |
| I wonder if the appelation 'devious' ought to be applied to Ferdi instead of Pippin? Clearly he didn't drink the sleeping draught, but poured out almost all of it while Nell's back was turned, leaving just enough for show, or perhaps just enough to dull the pain. His plan was to get rid of the healer and then have time to explain what happened to Nell? Plans don't always work out - he ought to know that very well right about now. That is one of the fastest births I've ever heard of. I know that she had been staving off labor for a while, and even on bed rest she probably had been progressing a bit. I've heard of many women walking around for a couple of weeks dilated to a few centimeters. And Nell has had a number of children (I really don't have a good idea how many, but at least four?) so she's not going to linger in the early stages, but this sounds like the entire labor is about ten minutes long. You labeled this a draft - if you're planning to revise it more, perhaps you could throw a contraction to two in the earlier part that Nell can ignore, or even at the end of the previous chapter, to make the labor ongoing? It would give Ferdi a very good reason to dispose of the sleeping draught too. Or was that the thought all along, he saw what was happening and didn't want to miss another birth? He is very observant, though not as much so when his head is splitting. Author Reply: Well, we had a birth locally during the big ice storm, and the normal 8 minute time for paramedics to arrive at a certain address was doubled. From the time the mom went into the bathroom and realised she was in labour until the baby was born was about 10 minutes. The grandmother did the actual delivery while a 9-1-1 operator talked her through it. They used a shoelace from the grandfather's running shoe to tie the umbilitcal cord! All in all an amazing story. Nell has been in labour for days, and is probably getting pretty good at ignoring the contractions until she cannot ignore them... Anyhow, have inserted a warning cramp right after Nell soothes Ferdi to sleep (at least, temporary sleep). Does that help the credibility? | |
| Lyta Padfoot | Reviewed Chapter: 30 on 1/11/2004 |
| Pippin was VERY lucky Pimpernel gave birth before she really got started into him! Glad Ferdi didn't miss this one. Author Reply: I'm glad, too. | |
| Grey Wonderer | Reviewed Chapter: 30 on 1/11/2004 |
| Very nice chapter. Pippin is in trouble now, but he got very lucky that the baby decided to show up when it did. A very big distraction I'd say! LOL Author Reply: Yes, talk about saved by the belle! | |