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Serious Trouble  by The Karenator 10 Review(s)
LeawardReviewed Chapter: 6 on 3/6/2005
It's so nice to see Thranduil caring for Daeron -- stepping in for his father. What a lovely sight, especially the way he is often treated in fanfic.
And the tears rolled down my face again, but not from laughter this time. You really captured the emotion Daeron felt at hearing how his father died.

What a great writer you are!

Author Reply: Thank you for such a nice compliment. Thranduil thanks you too. He's nothing like he's portrayed sometimes!

In my world of Mirkwood, the royal family is tight. And there's a lot of love. Losing Tarondor was quite traumatic for everyone, but no one felt worse than Thranduil, I don't think. He gave the order to go to Dol Guldur. I imagine he carries a lot of guilt. But he loves Seregon and Daeron like his own sons. I decided that he took male role with Daeron, but he did not usurp Noreth. She's Daeron's mother. I think lots of family conferences go on around the palace. I also didn't think that Noreth would push Seregon to fill the father role. She just wanted Seregon and Daeron to be brothers.

I'm glad you found the scene moving. Especially since I was trying to write it from a child's perspective.

Thanks for all the kind words.

Karen

Hisie LomeReviewed Chapter: 6 on 5/1/2004
Karen,
I love having Saturday morning coffee and reading your tale. However, as I am prone to being a blithering idiot and having the grace of a drunk drawf prior to my daily ration of Starbuck's kicking in , if you recieve a very strange review that is only half way sensible, it is because I hit the wrong button and my last review disappeared.

Well, I will try this again...

As always, the Valar have the most interesting senses of humor in the morning and often test my metal to see if I will overcome this daily sleep haze and actually begin to function!


How do you get into Daeron's head and heart so well? I found it rather touching that he was tired of the constant adult attentions; yet, unknowingly this elfling craved the touch of his uncle and Seregon. ( Although- he still does not want anyone to know the role that the evil spider played in the whole affair.)

Also, that Daeron felt warmth by being called , "My child", by Thranduil was nice. Thranduil as "uncle" and not "king" was well displayed. THe fatherly Thranduil would try to give comfort to the children .The nightmares were to be expected, and for some time as well.

I thought it poignant that Daeron felt remorse about his role in the death of the man. These gray matters of morality take many years to sort. But that Aldamir's arrow was the needed was evident.

I also felt it funny about Thranduil never giving punishment, only consequences...I use that one on a daily basis. Lol! the king’s
son scrubbing ladies unmentionables and the new knowledge of botany seemed to be things that in the future a wise warrior simply would never admit to. The fact that Erelas recognized this consequence must give one the hint that he also has had some major errors in judgement in his youth....



Erelas being hurt was sad. So much angst for these young ones! What a retched person you must be....I had to actually get off my couch and get a refill of coffee just to not become upset! Actually, my coffee had gone cold and I was thinking of some rather unladylike terms to share with your muse about this most unfortunate event. But even then I was amused that Daeron was concerned
that Erelas had to drink that nasty tasting medicine.

Seregon's guilt over his adar's death was moving. One wonders just how much these feelings have shaped this elf. That Daeron would seek his brother and cry without fully knowing why again demonstrates how distraught and fragile the young one feels. That

Seregon had to reassure his brother that warriors try to be safe was most sad.

Yes, I think that Tarondor could sense his elfling's fea. Daeron just does not realize his adar's presense has always been a part of his life.


Thank you for all of your hard work....
Mina Sedth, Hisie Lome

P.S. Thanks for your email about "Forgotten War". I do not know if I ever actually sent your reply. Please forgive me if I was

remiss. I have had such a trail with technology this year (one stolen laptop, two major virus', and a failed hard drive on My Brand NEW was laptop)


So here the data you requested: with sourced information.
http://www.jrrvf.com/hisweloke/sindar/
http://www.rialian.com/quenya-english.htm#n
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Parthenon/2196/
http://www.uib.no/People/hnohf/qcourse.htm

Mina Sedth= Seek peace,
I believe that this is silvan and I took this from a tale about southern protol warriors. I can't for the life of me figure why

the ending would be "th", most often Sindar and Silvan end in "dh" . I may begin to just use the Sindarian spellings...Less

confussion.

Minna (sindar) = enter
Sidh (sindar) =peace

Cundunya= Prince Mine, Quenyan and is very formal.
Cund (sindar)= prince
Nin (sindar)= of me or mine

Cundu (quenya)= prince
nye (quenya arct) for me
nya (quenya)= me, mine

It is a term of respect, yet also implies a strong sense of brotherhood (and ownership)....Yes, you are my prince, but only because once again I have pulled the arrow out of your side, stitched you up, and managed not to strangle you for all of your foolishness-AGAIN! When I TELL your father.....he will not be amused.

Minna Sedh, Hisie Lome




Author Reply: Hi Hisie Lome,

It's so good to hear from you. And you're still a trooper! After all the trouble you've had with your computers and then to have another review vanish into thin air...well, I can'tell you how good it makes me feel that you go to the trouble of doing it again. I truly enjoy them.

Daeron really likes having the father-figure in Thranduil, but I think it also magnifies the loss of his own adar sometimes. Up until now, he's probably missed his adar, but he's facing making big decisions in his life (like becoming a warrior) and we all know how the transtition from child to teenager to adult can try even the most patient, so he's become acutely aware of not having his adar there with him. Now that Seregon has finally admitted to himself the demons that have plagued him, I think he'll be more available for Daeron. Daeron finds he likes this caring side of Seregon.

Consequences...yep, me too. I'm an expert punishment-wielding nana, and I call it consequences, too. I learned that from Thranduil. I imagine that Erelas spent some time dipping out wash pots himself. He's pretty knowledgable about how the whole thing works. Thranduil knows what a gem he has in the laundry in Morwen. She can make the importance of the forest and the wood elves' lifestyle come alive in her tales.

I think the time will come when Daeron recognizes his adar's presence has always been with him, too. It may take some time and maturity before this happens. And I think it'll take something important to jar him in suddenly realizing this.

I'm certain you will find support that I'm a terribly wretched person. Just ask my sons...the ones who know all about consequences. Yes, Erelas met up with some nasty blade wielders, and they did some damage. It's another reality that has come home for the little guys. It's dangerous out there. But I'm glad you recognize that it's my muse and not me. Feel free to let him have it anytime you wish. I do so regularly. He's one of the 'little people'. His name is Elendv and since he's so short, I'll hold him for you. :>)

Thank you for all the reference pages. I can't wait to zip over and look at them. I've not been able to find any I thought were very helpful and these look promising.

Thanks again for reading and reviewing. I'm so please you hung in there with me during my 'silent period'. I hope the last chapter won't take me so long to get up. Karen

meckinockReviewed Chapter: 6 on 5/1/2004

FQK -
Sorry about the review delay - it's just lucky I had to check in at Chaos Central today or it might have been Monday before I got this out! I should also mention that our building is conducting a test of the intercom system today so I've been listening to some guy count to 20 repeatedly since about 6 AM - in the likely event that this ends up being completely incoherent that's my excuse...

The thing I always enjoy about your writing is the effortless transition between wise-cracking humor and in-depth character analysis. The character relationships and thematic elements are subtly woven into the plot developments and are as complex, contradictory, and constantly evolving as are real life ones. This is Daeron's story; but Daeron is far from the only character to gain a new awareness of himself, his family members, and his place in the scheme of things. I think a lot of people would have doubted that anyone could produce such a multi-layered, complex character piece from the mouth of a smart-ass pre-adolescent narrator, but my lady, you nailed it! The care taken to flesh out villains as well as heroes; minor characters as well as major ones, is impressive, as was the attention to minor details. I was personally struck by the realism of one casual moment between Aldamir and Seregon upon receiving the news of Erelas's injury; Aldamir wordlessly tilts the letter so Seregon can see it even before showing it to Thranduil. This such a realistic, understated, and matter-of-fact gesture for close comrades to make, yet so fleeting in the face of the overwhelming gravity of the situation that it would have been overlooked by many writers. I would love to see more of these two in action, by the way!

If you don't hear from me before Monday, blame AT&T!
mrk

Author Reply: Wow! Ranger friend, what a nice review. I'm glad Chaos Central is on-line so you could drop in. I'm pleased that Daeron's mouth hasn't stopped him from seeing some of the 'bigger picture' of life. He's still young and all of this new found knowledge might take a little while to sink it, but at least he's paying attention. I think Aldamir and Seregon are very close...as close as their younger brothers, but with a lot more time under their belts. I think they can read each other like books. I wasn't sure exactly when to have Aldamir show the letter to Seregon. It seemed the king should be informed first, but I couldn't see Aldamir just sitting there next to Seregon and not clueing him in. Seregon is Aldamir's second in command after all, and he should be right at the top of the list of who gets told quickly. It seemed natural for Aldamir to just simply tilt the note so that Seregon could see it. They are the ones who deal with the every day command of the troops, and it was a military matter...as well as a family matter. I'm glad you found this realistic. I hope we'll get to see these two in action in the next chapter, though it's sort of 'behind closed doors', and we might just have to use our imaginations a little bit...okay, a lot. However, I think these two are a formidable pair, and I'd love to see them loosing arrows and wielding swords, too. I have to run the next chapter by my beta plot hole detective first--I think you know her. She knows a lot about these things, you see.

Really, Ranger, this was such a nice review. If this story is anywhere near as well done as you say, then you should take a bow. I could not do it without your input and support. You keep me focused and not off chasing wargs. Thank you for all your help. And thank you for taking the time go over this thing...again and then review. Above and beyond the call of duty, if you ask me. BTW, I think Aldamir has his eye on you. He's says it's strictly a professional interest, but I saw the way he looked at you....

Thanks again for everything, Karen

Maeglin the TraitorReviewed Chapter: 6 on 4/30/2004
Most honored Queen Kaladriel,

I have but a short time before I must ride out with Lalaith the Avenger. I take quill in hand to review this last chapter before I depart. Have also penned a note to my next of kin, always a wise precaution I find when accompanying Lalaith.

What an intense chapter! It lulls you into a certain sense of peace and "it's over" and then grabs you by the throat yet again. The entire segment with the wounding of Erelas was beautifully done. The moment when Lalaith grew pale broke my heart with only a few simple words of description. You have a talent for conveying much in very few words. I loved also the small question Legolas breathes to Daeron, "what if he dies?" as summing up all of the elfling's terror in four small words. I also loved when Daeron and Legolas are being taken to Erelas' room and Daeron says, "I simply did not seem to be getting enough air as I wrestled with my fear of seeing Erelas wounded, and my overwhelming desire to see him." Perfect. A child's reaction coupled with the beginnings of adult courage.

Loved the scenes where Daeron questions Seregon about the death of their father. Seregon's character is becoming increasingly layered as you continue the story. The almost too perfect warrior is revealing the conflict he has lived with, his father dead because of him, his little brother bereft of the father he knew. It is a heavy burden, but he shows signs of finally accepting it and moving on to be the support his little brother needs.

I hear Lalaith summoning me and she is not patient as we both well know. I bid you a fond farewell, my lady, until your next chapter.

Maeglin the Traitor

Author Reply: My sweet elfling,

What patience you have. Lalaith is so...determined when she sets her mind. I think I have calmed her for the time being. Let us hope that no further news come to her ears that will upset her. Do keep your eye on her...the frog thing, you know. It just fuels that 'elf-witch' thing.

I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter. I think I enjoyed most trying to let Seregon uncover his innermost fears and give Daeron a glimpse into what has driven him all these years. I'm not sure Daeron completely gets it at this point, but he has the beginnings of an understanding about his stern older brother. I think Seregon is finally beginning to face it himself. Guilt is a heavy burden. I also think Seregon would be most pleased if Daeron decided to not be a warrior and decide instead to grow daisies or something less dangerous. He just realized how frightening it will be to have his brother face danger.

Legolas and Daeron have had a lot to deal with. Things have really gone to pot, and the little guys are being exposed to such difficult issues for the first time. I doubt that Mirkwood has been sailing along without any bumps before this, but these two have been too young to know exactly what was going on. When they got into the thick of things this time, they got in head first.

Thank you for reviewing. I know Lalaith keeps you busy, but you are always such a wonderful support for this queen. And I want my time with you, too!

Kaladriel

Orophins DottirReviewed Chapter: 6 on 4/30/2004
*Lalaith struggles back to consciousness as Maeglin continues to pat her hand in concern. She glares at all of Arda.*

"Whoever did this to Erelas will have Lalaith to deal with! Maeglin, saddle horses and forget about a palfrey for this Queen. Bring me Fuin and tell that horse not to give you an argument! *Starts looking around for that battleaxe Gimli gave her this past Yule. She knew it would come in handy.*

Sister, an excellent chapter! What is that dreadful Chinese curse, "may you live in interesting times"? Seems to have descended on us in Mirkwood.

Dear, no offense but, if you continue to describe Thranduil so appealingly, he will start to receive missives from fangirls, and I may be forced to take steps. Turning elleths into frogs does get one such a reputation, however much the little twits may deserve it!

I do love the character of Morwen. So much so that I shall inevitably have to "borrow" her one day! Warm, wise and shrewd. I can well see Queen Luinil being close friends with the head of the laundry.

Your "minor" characters are always quite fine. In this chapter, I love how Borgil, the dour and stern tutor, shows a gentle side while keeping the worried elflings distracted. Even the not too introspective Daeron seems to have a glimmer of what Borgil is doing. Daeron's not perfect perception of Borgil's actions was a delicate and lovely touch to your story. Our little scamp is indeed growing up, perhaps faster than we might wish.

Well, I see Maeglin is bringing the horses, so we must be off now. Sister, you will understand if I am forced to obliterate whichever of your characters harmed my son?

Ever,
Lalaith


Author Reply: Maeglin, my sweet elfling, take the horses back to the stable. Maeglin huffs and turns around to lead the horses back from whence he came.

Lalaith, dear, the vile creature who harmed your son is already deader than a doornail. Your son needs you at his side, not off chasing corpses. The king's border patrol is more than capable, Sistah. Calm yourself. Put the axe back in the corner. Slowly, Lalaith, slowly.

And no more frogs! Lalaith, my dear sistah, you cannot continue to turn every elleth who looks upon your husband into amphibians. The king has eyes for no one but his beautiful lady wife. Whew....I am growing weary here. I think I shall just sit down for a moment. Too much excitement. Turns to a servant who has the misfortune to be passing, "Fetch some of the king's finest red for two overwrought queens. Will you, dear?"

I like Morwen, too. I think she was not just an accomplished lady with thread and cloth, but a very good friend for the queen. I think she would love an expanded role. It gets tiresome just sitting around the laundry.

I'm so glad you like the minor characters and their roles. Borgil's not a bad guy. The little guys just see him as a stern taskmaster, but he's a very caring and kind Elf. But you know how hard it can be to keep those little minds on the task at hand?

I so appreciate the review. I know it's upsetting to you to see your beloved child harmed, but the healers are confident that he will be well soon. Look, there comes the servant with your glass of Dorwinion. Now sit here next to me and tell me if you've heard any new gossip.

Your loving sistah, Kaladriel

FirnsarnienReviewed Chapter: 6 on 4/29/2004
OMG! The Karenator! I'm so glad you're back! I didn't know if you were gonna write more to the story or not! I'm certainly glad you did!

This chappy was incredible! From the top of my head to the tips of my toes! Awesome! There were so many beautiful moments between the brothers, it just brought tears to my eyes and made my heart smile!

Hmmm, let's start at the beginning...I really liked how you made Daeron so uncertain of what he'd like to talk to his uncle about. It shows how young that Elf truly is that he doesn't fully understand his emotions.

I loved the way Seregon crept into Daeron's bedroom early in the story and just cuddled his little brother. *sigh* That was just so sweet! The comfort he gave Daeron comforted me! LOL It was interesting to see how much Daeron's changed from someone who liked to aggravate his older brother to someone who realizes how dear he is to him and how he'd never like to hurt him again. What a revelation that little Elfling has had from this horrible encounter with men. Ah, and the nightmare, perfect touch, just perfect! *another sigh* Oh, and that little scene between them at the end...oh...Daeron's fear for his brother really hit home there! Seregon comforted him beautifully and every little part of that scene was written so beautifully and so believably! Alas, too bad brothers aren't really like that (at least mine isn't!). :( *sigh*

LOL That little scene in Thranduil's office even had me curling my toes in dread! LOL The way Daeron was praised was great, but I love how both him and Legolas were punished as well! Silly Elflings!

Good grief, when I read that Erelas had been wounded, I grew as pale as Legolas and my heart started racing! And the further I read, the more pale I got! I thought you were gonna kill him! :( I sure couldn't take that! I think my heart would break for sure!! *sob*

Watching Daeron go through that little breakdown sure made me feel that at any moment, Legolas go through one of his own! I swear, I even half expected for Leggy to break down when they were in the laundry room! LOL And throughout this whole chapter, I kept expecting for him to fall to the ground in a dead faint, or break down in tears, or start screaming or just go quiet and numb! Hmmmm, any plans for Daeron to witness that? I think we need some more serious Legolas angst now that we've gotten a big, beautiful, heaping spoonful of Daeron angst! ;) *yet another sigh* :)

Ok, I've blabbed enough I think! LOL I'm so glad you didn't abandon this story as I feared! I can't wait for another installment! :) You *do* plan on another one, don't you? ;)

Author Reply: Hi Firnsarnien,

Goodness, I wouldn't leave the poor little elflings out on a limb! I got in a time crunch and just couldn't seem to get this chapter to postable form.

I think Daeron was a little overwhelmed by all that's happened and not quite mature enough to sort it all out. And you're right; he wanted to be left alone and to be comforted all at the same time. Seregon is learning about himself, too. I don't think he's been able to be very available for his younger brother. He's carried a lot of guilt about his adar's death and through no fault of Daeron's, Seregon looked at him and was remined of his father's sacrifice. Their relationship has been uneasy at best. Almost losing the littel squirt has made Seregon re-evaluate his own feelings, I think. Before you go hating your own brothers for being such...well, brothers...remember the age difference in these 'older' brothers and the elflings. Seregon and Aldamir especially are a lot older. Their relationships are more adult-like than mine or your brothers. We've had to put up with the growing up years! :>)

Poor Erelas. Don't worry, the healers assure me that he'll be fine. He just needs a little time to recover. I'm sure there are a few little guys around the palace who will gladly entertain him during his convalescence.

I imagine Legolas has had his moments of delayed stress, too. I think he would have kept it to his bedchambers, too. In my mind, one of the reasons Thranduil 'knew' Daeron would be needing to talk about this, was that he had already held a disturbed little blond in his lap and listened as he poured out his heart. I'm not sure Legolas and Daeron would 'break down' in front of each other or in the presence of anyone but Adar or Seregon. You know how guys are. And Daeron knows better than to give Legolas any ammunition...don't forget the dining room spider episode. :>)For right now, I'll let you use your imagination for Legolas's little breakdown. I'm sure it would better than mine anyway.

You NEVER blab! I love your reviews. They're so much fun for me to read. I can't tell you how much I appreciate them. And yes, there will be at least one more chapter. I've still got to explain those mysterious men. I hope you'll stay with me. Thanks again.

Karen

NilmandraReviewed Chapter: 6 on 4/29/2004
Well, I should think that Legolas would be comforted by the knowledge that his brother had done time in the laundry as well. That is one interesting thing about the long gaps that could occur between children - the younger don't know what mischief the older got into. :D.

Daeron suddenly sees his brother in a new way, and realizes how much he loves him. That was nicely shown - and also Daerons' wondering how Seregon dealt with knowing his father died to save him. I think Daeron is coming to understand that Seregon would do the same for him.

Poor Erelas, the life of a warrior is dangerous. I hope these young ones aren't about to get a lesson in the separation of hroa and fea. :(

Author Reply: Hi Nilmandra,

I think the little ones have rarely thought their older brothers were ever young enough to get into a little trouble of their own. I imagine they all put in their fair share of laundry duty, too. Morwen is the main attraction there. Thranduil is wise in sending his troublesome offspring and nephews to her. She knows the history of 'why and where' and imparts a love of the Greenwoods that only she can share.

Daeron and Seregon have both come to view each other in a new light. Seregon carries a lot of guilt, I think, and Daeron has been too young to know the truth about their ada until now. They have met on the common ground of where their lives and love intersects. And yes, Seregon would place himself between Daeron and anything or anyone who sought to harm him. We even see the beginning of such understanding of what Daeron would do in a similiar situation, too.

No, I don't think we'll see any lessons in death. I learned my lesson when that sneaky minstrel tried to kill off Eilian. The village uprising was more than difficult to put down that time! If it had not been for you, my sweet, adorable child, staying her hand, we would all still be in mourning.

Thanks for reviewing. I always love to hear from you. Karen

Kitt of LindonReviewed Chapter: 6 on 4/29/2004
I love the family relationships shown here.
Very interesting about Legolas' grandmother and grandfather. Most authors seem to shy from the fact that Oropher must have been married to someone. Heh, I've always wanted to write the story of the Sindar's coming to the Silvan Elves.
And, oh, I was worried for Erelas, certainly you won't kill him?
That must be aweful for Daeron and Seregon. Daeron hopes to be a warrior to find a bond to his father. And his father died for Seregon! So sad.

Author Reply: Hi Kitt,

The coming of the Sindar to the Silvan Elves 'is' an interesting point to ponder. Meckinock and I have batted around this problem for some time and we, being the ornery old cusses we are, cannot see the Sindar just riding in like the cavalry and saying to these proud, independent Silvan Elves, "Hey! The superior Elves are here now, so we'll just take over." There had to be some logical explanation for why the Silvan folk would accept the Sindar as rulers. The best I could come up with was that it was the decision of the Silvans themselves to make Oropher king. I think you should write your story! Inquiring minds (me!) want to know what you think happened. I'd love to read it. Since it's a fill-in-the-blank story that Tolkien did not delve into, you can't get it wrong!

Daeron is just beginning to stick his big toe over the threshold of leaving the complete innocence of early childhood. Learning how the world works still shocks me most days. But he and Daeron have some very good help in getting through the next rocky stages of growing up. And even Seregon made some important discoveries. (You have to discern his from his behavior since Daeron really can't tell us what's going on in his brother's head. :>) I really like Seregon. He's had a lot to work through himself. He and Daeron will come out much stronger from all this.

Thanks again, Kitt.

Karen

BodkinReviewed Chapter: 6 on 4/29/2004
Some of my favourite lines from this chapter -

'I became the butter, and I only wanted to melt into him'

'Legolas frowned as he thought this over. "How do you know this?"
Erelas laughed aloud. "We have met." '

'Now, this was a piece of information I could have lived without all the way to the Undying Lands and never missed.'


'She could even best your grandfather in a match and did so at every opportunity. She said it kept him humble.'


'"Listen to your brother, Erelas," I whispered. "He is wise beyond his years."'


This is just chock full of the most beautiful and amusing lines, elegantly counterpointed with sadness. I'm looking forward to more.

Author Reply: Gosh, thank you, Bodkin. I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter. It took me a little longer to get it up than I had planned, so I'm grateful anyone remembers it!

One of my favorite places was when Erelas admitted, without really admitting it, that he had 'done time' in the laundry, too. I think Thranduil was wise in his choice of consequences for his sons and nephews. I think Morwen is the reason he sends errant little princes over there. She is living history.

Thank you again for reading and reviewing.

Karen

daw the minstrelReviewed Chapter: 6 on 4/29/2004
I cheered when I saw that this story was continuing. Daeron is certainly learning some hard lessons, and I don't mean how to do laundry. I've wondered about that bond to a parent too. Perhaps Daeron feels it but doesn't know it because he's never been without it. Maybe it's like feeling your heart beat. A spouse is different because the couple forms that bond, and the same thing with the bond of the parent to the child. The parent feels the difference when it starts. But the child has always had it.

Author Reply: Hi daw,

Doesn't this seem weird? Our roles have reversed.

I'm glad you were pleased to see that Daeron has a few loose ends to tie up and joined him. He has learned a few things on his journey, or at least, I hope the rascal has learned something. Seregon is coming to terms with some of his inner demons, too. He and Daeron are learning to truly be brothers. The parent-child bond is interesting. You made some very good points and your thinking is very similar to mine. I think Daeron 'is' connected to his adar, but he simply doesn't know how to find it. I was also thinking that because he doesn't remember his adar, he can't connect to how to recognize that it has always been with him. He just doesn't know what it is. In my mind's eye, I see Tarondor knowing his connection to his wife and sons very strongly, and he knows Daeron has no memories to recognize his bond with him, so I think he's constantly trying to figure out how to get Daeron's attention. IMO, when Daeron gets a little older, he'll suddenly realize that his adar has always been with him.

Thanks, daw, for your review. I appreciate you taking the time to read and leave a review. It's always a treat for me to hear from you.

Karen

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