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Going On A Bear Hunt  by Jay of Lasgalen 11 Review(s)
NilmandraReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/20/2005
Great story, Jay. Sorry I am so behind on reading (12 submissions in three days :P).

I like the close relationship your twins have, able to sense each other and know when something is wrong. I am also particularly interested to know how that novice managed to hit Elladan! Do they get demerits for injuring their instructors? This group seem quite able to injure themselves, though, too.

I hope this did well in the challange.

Author Reply: I'm not sure - no-one is - how that novice managed to shoot Elladan. It was a pure accident though, so he won't be penalised.

The twins' ability to sense one another when one is hurt is very useful here. It's just as well, considering how accident prone they all are.

Thanks for reviewing, Nilmandra!

KalimaReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/17/2005
Oh, thank you ! A perfect little story to play hookey on. (I'm supposed to be editing -- absolutely promised my mate I was editing while I read your story. I feel badly about that. I'll have to make it up to him somehow.)

I just can't pick up any long stories just now -- too swamped, so I appreciate this and the reminder about the contest. (I had forgotten.)

Author Reply: Don't feel too guilty about playing hookey - at least it's a short story!

I'm going to try to stick to shorter fics from now - the long ones are just too long, and I go for far too long between updates.

Thanks for reviewing - now get back to your editing!



LamielReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/17/2005
This is a nice adventure story. The action is mixed with just the right amount of humor and angst to make it really enjoyable. I also liked the added detail of Elladan and Elrohir being able to sense if something were wrong with the other. That's a documented ability among some close family members and even human twins, so I'm sure it would be even more so for Elves.

Author Reply: I've always written that sort of closeness between Elladan and Elrohir - I think Elven twins would have some sort of empathy with each other.

I wanted this story to be short, complete and light-hearted - as opposed to some of my other efforts with a long hiatus between updates! I'm glad you liked it.

KittyReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/17/2005
Another story I have enjoyed. I love the way how the twins are connected and Elladan knew instantly something has happened to his brother and Elrohir knew there would be help shortly. It must have been very relieving for them to know help is on the way.

And the thing with the arrow ... *grins* ... I've known the elves are excellent archers, but to shot in one direction and to hit a target in the opposite direction is quite impressing :-)

Author Reply: Well, it wasn't intentional to shoot in the opposite direction and hit Elladan! I doubt it would be possible for anyone, even an elf - but I needed a reason for Elladan to have to stay behind.

The bond between the twins is very useful at times like this - it makes rescue missions much easier!

Thank you for the review.

BodkinReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/17/2005
Poor Elladan for the embarrassment of being shot by a novice with no sense of direction - but what a good thing for the bear hunters! At least they knew that help would be with them rather more quickly than it would had he been with them.

And at least this cave didn't attack Legolas. Although Elrohir is seeming a bit accident prone at the moment. But if the twin-bond is to be really useful, I suppose it had to be him. And I love Elrond!

Author Reply: I suspect the backwards-shooting arrow is an impossibility - but who cares? I needed an excuse for Elladan to remain behind. If he hadn't, no-one would have known to go looking for them until nightfall at least.

As you say, it had to be Elrohir this time - and at least it gave Legolas a reprieve!

Elrond only had a cameo role in this story, but he made the most of it!

Thanks for the review.

ElvenesseReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/16/2005
I like the little things that you've added - like the novice who acted in a nice sensible manner and sent for Glorfindel. And how Elladan tried to reassure him, even though he was worried about his brother.

I found the stray arrow amusing (unlike Elladan :-)). That reminded me very much of the glee I felt, when watching my PE teacher move very fast to get out of the way of a javelin (not a very nice woman, and she was standing in the middle of the field - almost as if she was daring someone to hit her)!

The demonstration of their bond was good, although I suppose it might prove distracting in the middle of a fight. Then again, they're probably ready for it under those sorts of circumstances.

Is it just conscience, or is the story title based on a children’s story that starts: "We're going on a bear hunt. / We're going to catch a big one. / What a beautiful day! / We're not scared."

Author Reply: :) Was the javelin thrown at your PE teacher deliberately? :)

The arrow wasn't funny at the time, but I needed a good reason for Elladan to remain in Imladris when the others went off. I've always written that sort of link between the twins, and it was very useful here.

I think Elven youngsters would be fairly sensible, so even though the novices were worried by Elladan's sudden collapse, they handled it well.

You're right about the title of the story - when I decided they were hunting a bear, the title was inevitable! It was always a favourite with my class.

Thanks for reviewing!

paranoidangelReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/16/2005
I did like Legolas' hatred of caves constantly coming up. And the archer that managed to shoot backwards.

Author Reply: I'm sure it's not really possible for an archer to shoot backwards - but what the heck, it made a good line!

Poor Legolas really doesn't like caves, but at least he wasn't the one to get hurt this time.

Thanks for reviewing.

FaithReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/16/2005
love it! love it!:D




faith, the slightly obssessed fangirl


Author Reply: Thanks!

daw the minstrelReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/16/2005
I liked the switching points of view, Jay. You showed the connection between the twins very dramatically. And a lucky thing it is for Elrohir that it exists!

Author Reply: You know how I like to write about the twins! I always try to show that bond between them - and it certainly has its uses.

Thanks for the review!

elliskaReviewed Chapter: 1 on 2/16/2005
Well, Jay, I read the title and realized nothing good could come of a bear hunt and I was right:) I like the connection between the twins as you portray it (and the friendship between Aragorn, the twins and Legolas). Poor things, though. It's a good thing elves are tough. :) Thanks for another great story.

Author Reply: The connection between the twins is very useful at times - Elladan was able to raise the alarm much quicker than if they simply hadn't come back that night!

Thanks - I'm glad you liked this.

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