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The Circle  by The Karenator 16 Review(s)
TariReviewed Chapter: 1 on 7/30/2007
What a tantalising ficlet. "Tomorrow" made me wonder if there would be more coming. If so, this certainly is a delightful start. Ghosts in Middle-Earth? Why not.

Tari

grumpyReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/28/2006
I loved your story of the rangers, Elrohir, and whatever may have been clearing. Not only did Hurin hear it, so did Halbarad, bet he never admits it.
Halbarad and Hurin are wonderful, can not get enough of those rangers. I had to laugh at their cooking, they threw in even the bits that where unidentifiable, good heavens. Thanks for the great story.

Author Reply: Thanks, Grumpy. I agree that Halbarad will probably never tell a soul what he saw. He can't quite believe it himself. If there's not a rational explanation, he'll simply create one.

Being a good cook is an art, I think. It requires a lot of creativity and using what you have. I saw Hurin as being the sort of guy who was always turning things in his head, looking for new spins on old ways. He was used to eating at his mother's table, and the 'wild' fare of the rangers was probably a little strange to his palate. I imagine the rangers were used to making do with what they had, and Hurin figured there must be some way to make it taste better.

Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to review. I appreciate it more than you know.

DotReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/10/2006
*slinks back in, utterly shamefaced* So, where was I?

I’d forgotten what a delicious way you have with language. The descriptions all add so much to the story but are so natural and understated. How do you do it??

I love the background you give to Hurin. Those dreamy, writer types can be such a burden to their family ;-) You’ve created a very calm, familiar setting and Hurin’s entry is quite startling. It’s interesting to see Halbarad struggling to know how to treat him. I get the impression he feels he should treat him as he would any other boy of this age but he knows that this one is different. And not just because he’s his son. I bet another kid wouldn’t have been treated to the same patience if he rushed back with tales of ghosts. And yet, it seems that Halbarad himself wasn’t always a fearless ranger – I love the brief mention of his memories of his own first patrols. Not only does it give us a glimpse of him, but of the strength of tradition for the Dunedain.

Something I really like is the balance between Halbarad’s practicality and Elrohir’s… elvishness. I laughed at Halbarad thinking how he must ask Elrohir where the houseless elves were so that he could avoid them!

Not all Hurin’s dreams had been good ones. That line really stood out for me. I felt so bad for Hurin. He’s obviously a more sensitive soul than your average Dunedan and in the life he leads, some of the things he’s seen or heard must have played on his imagination.

I’m grinning at the conversation between Elrohir and Halbarad about ghosts and the wind. Of course Halbarad was going to find himself off on a ghost hunt! Don’t tell him I said this, but his irritation amuses me no end :-)

And there I was chuckling away at Brandol when he suddenly mentions that the place used to be inhabited and there are tales of the dead still lingering there. Now that sent a shiver up my spine! You do such a great job with atmosphere. I love the way you create the unsettling sense of something not being quite right and of all these rational people suddenly wondering if there’s something out there that’s a lot harder to deal with than Orcs.

I love the bit too about Hurin being a “thinker.” Halbarad can see the attributes that this boy will bring to patrol. He may be different than his brothers – and his father – but sometimes that’s a good thing. It must be hard for Halbarad to let this one grow up. Sometimes it’s hardest with the youngest, eh Karen? I was glad to see that he did well, and did what he was told, even though the first battle must be a horrific place to have to put training into practice.

Another thing I like (well, aren’t I a broken record! Must find new ways of saying “like” and “love”) is the trust that Halbarad has in Aragorn. He only briefly pops into his head, and yet Halbarad doesn’t even feel the need to question Aragorn’s secrecy about the Shire because he has complete faith in him. Hurin, on the other hand, is – quite naturally – inquisitive and probably has yet to learn implicit trust that’s not based on following orders. I did want to clap at his speech about doing the right thing, though! It really summed up these people so well. And it makes me smile to see Halbarad’s love for and pride in his son. It seems too that he’s learned the value of the type of person his son is.

And the end… well, wow. I glad, actually, that Halbarad saw the little girl. It seems to me that he’s allowed himself to become a little more open during the time spent with his son and perhaps that’s why he saw her now and didn’t the first time. It also appears to suggest the ties between past, present and future for the Dunedain and how it takes not just the strength that they all have but Halbarad’s faith and Hurin’s dreams and the hope in them all to achieve the future that they believe so strongly in.

I’m sure I’ve left out loads but this was a truly excellent little tale. I hope we see more from you soon :-)










Author Reply: Gosh, Dot, I'm sorry it's taken me so long to reply. I've read your review over and over, thinking each time if my stories were half as good as your reviews, I'd be thrilled. You are such a good reader and reviewer. I love how sensitive you are to little nuances and themes.

It also appears to suggest the ties between past, present and future for the Dunedain and how it takes not just the strength that they all have but Halbarad’s faith and Hurin’s dreams and the hope in them all to achieve the future that they believe so strongly in.

This sentence sums everything up just beautifully. If I ever need a synopsis, I'm hiring you!

Hurin is a tad different than the ordinary ranger, though I suspect many of them have hidden talents rarely revealed on patrol. But Hurin is still young, wet behind the ears, and still trying to figure life out. He's eager to do his duty, but he's got to have everything straight in his head. He doesn't seem to be a simple follower, but the sort of guy who ponders reasons for actions, right and wrong, and the big picture. From the moment I read Meckinock's description of him, I was intrigued by him. I couldn't help but wonder how Halbarad, an infinitely practical guy, would handle a kid who is more dreamer than hard-boiled ranger. My hope was for Halbarad to see that dreamers like Hurin have a place.

Elrohir was a little more willing to accept that Hurin had something strange. Elves live for so long, I guess there's not much they've not heard about or seen with their own eyes. He knows about lingering memories, imprints made on geographical places by the people who once lived there. I remember Legolas on the Quest talking about the stones of Hollin still remembering the elves who had once lived there. It's not much of a leap from memory to ghost sightings. At least, it's not for me. :>)

I've always wanted to write a ghost story, but nothing came together. Hurin was the only character I could find willing to turn up blue in the face with fright. It's a testament to Meckinock's skill as a writer that she created such a whole character in Hurin without him ever being present in her stories. I may not have written him exactly as she would have, but I appreciate her creative depiction of him and tried to work with that. I think I've just written a story that's fanfiction of fanfiction. :>)

I wanted Halbarad to see the little girl for several reasons. First of all, it brought things full circle. It also (I hope) showed that Halbarad had grown or changed in how he viewed his son, and he was open enough to see what his son saw. His son's 'visions' were important. The past, the present, and the future came together. You hit the nail on the head in your review!

Dot, thank you so much for this wonderful review. Your reviews are always a delight to read. This one was no exception. You know how to make a girl feel good. Thank you.





elliskaReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/7/2006
Catching up...sorry for being late. I am being a bad girl and reading at work rather than working. Wow, this was great! The ghost story really piqued my curiosity and had me reading fast to see what they would find/say. And when Halbarad was fighting back the lump in his throat I had tears in my eyes. What a great portrayal of Hurin and Halbarad seeing his son grow up right before his eyes. And I loved that Halbarad saw a ghost child at the end. That made me so happy for some reason. :-)

As usual I loved your dialogue in this--you do such an amazing job of showing so much about the characters through their speech.

This was great Karen! Glad to see you. :-)

Author Reply: Thank you, Elliska. I'm so glad you liked my ghost tale. Hurin showed up one day with his hair standing on end, and I thought he was adorable. I love this character even though we've really not met him yet. I hope Meckinock will include him in a chapter, even if it's just for a glimpse. I'm impressed that she's created such a complete character, and we've not set eyes on him.

I love a good ghost story. Not gory ones, just the Casper type ones. Being a mountain girl yourself, I'm sure you've heard your share. My great-grandmother and my grandmother collected ghost stories to tell me. They, the stories and my grandmothers, were such fun. Most of the h'aint tales were regional.

So...how, then, to incorporate a mild ghost tale into Middle-earth? I actually had a theme about the whole circle of like stuff and the past, present and future. Then hoped Tolkien wouldn't see the need to haunt a fanfiction writer.

In my mind, Halbarad was a good father. Tolkien didn't tell us anything about his personal life so I felt free to dream. And if Dr. Jung happened to be around, he'd probably point out that my baby just graduated from high school, and I'm working through this 'boy to man' scenario with Halbarad. The ghost started the story, and I thought it appropriate to let her end it. Besides, I wanted Halbarad to see her too. :>) Hurin sure felt better about his sighting.

I had such fun writing this. It was nice to jot something down again even if it did take me quite a while to get it done.

Thank you so much for the kind words. But most of all, I'm glad you enjoyed it. That makes my day.

DotReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/3/2006
Oooh... spooky...

This was fantastic, Karen. Just to let you know I'm a tad behind at the moment but I will leave a decent review soon. Great to see a story from you :-)

Author Reply: Thanks, Dot. I know all about being behind, so believe me, I understand. I'm just thrilled to know you enjoyed it.

perellethReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/3/2006
Hey! Soooo good to have you back even for one shot! This was great! man, I knew i missed your sense of humour and your wonderful sentences!

I loved this piece. Hurin is a lovely boy, and it is such a fine contrast to his father that it makes them both doubly endearing! Halbarad with a poet, dreamer, ranger and cook of a son! I really liked the pride that Hlabarad takes in his son as he sees the change he's going through and admits that, different to him as Hurin may be, he'll be a fine man, with much needed talents. There is much hope underlying this moment in time.

I loved so many things in this, but the opening paragraph almost stunned me. boy it was short, precise and shocking. And, of course, colourful, even in muted blues and dark shadows! Great couple of sentences! Halbarad's mild annoyment and Elrohir helpful, half teasing interest are a delight to read, and the whole tale about vanished settlers is very intriguing and unsettling.

he’d been through this section of Eriador more times than a dog scratched his fleas in a day Lololol! great, as always. Could we hope that RL will allow you to indulge in more writing? Hope so.

BTW, apologies for the delay, i've been out of town for some time...



Author Reply: Thanks, Perelleth! Welcome home! I'm so glad you enjoyed the story. RL has kept me out of the loop for a while, and it was indeed nice to get back in the saddle.

I feel in love with Hurin the first moment Meckinock mentioned him. Even though he's not really had a appearance--that I recall--she's created a memorable character I can see. Now, how close I am to her vision might be debatable, but I sure had fun rambling around the wild him and his dad.

And thank you for the kind words about the opening paragraph. I keep reading and hearing all about how you've only got a few sentences to hook your reader. That was my practice run. I'm so glad to hear you thought it worked.

I'm trying to keep up with a little reading...I'm way, way behind on reviews, and I'm trying to write some. I hope things will slow down a bit as the summer wears on, but even if it doesn't, I'm not giving up!

Thank you again. You're review means a lot to me.

ElflingimpReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/2/2006
That was simply wonderful.

Author Reply: Thank you, Elflingimp! I enjoyed writing it very much. And I appreciate your review. Thanks again.

meckinockReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/1/2006
Wow, I can't tell you how cool it is to read a story with my own OCs! I just love the way you've portrayed Hurin. This is exactly how I see him - brave and eager to please his father; a dreamer, but a purposeful, thoughtful dreamer, with jutting hair and all (that part's not mine, but I might have to borrow it). And his father is very patient with him, for a hard-head :-) It really shows here that you've raised two boys of your own. I love Halbarad's weary, "I believe you" when Hurin keeps pestering him about the ghosts.

Now, your Fair Southernness, I have to note the not-so-hidden meaning in the birth on the 29th of the fifth moon cycle and being fat, late, and distracted. The jeans joke is over, heah? I like Elrohir hanging with the Rangers, though. You know how in my take on E2 it's Elrohir who seems closer to Halbarad, so I liked him here, bantering with him and lightly taunting - True, if you were going to get any. And your way with words! - charming, as always - tighter than honeysuckle on a decayed fence.

Now, I cheered when Brandol showed up of course. I love that crotchety old coot. Well, he's not really that old, you know, he just likes everyone to think he was born that way. He gets some great lines, too - For what? There's a watch posted, you know. Love the cranky banter between him and Halbarad.

Of all the characterizations you nailed in this story, the one that could slide right past if you're not looking tickled me - Halbarad musing that his father was not one to repeat fanciful stories. That's exactly how I picture him - there was a man who did NOT have a dreamer gene.

The orc fight was great. I liked the assessment of the odds - Twenty would be crowded, but not impossible - and I loved Halbarad's deliberately low-key approach to readying his son for battle, and his balancing of his responsibility as Hurin's father with his responsibility as the leader of the patrol. His struggle to fight the fight while keeping an eye on his son without becoming too distracted to be effective was nail-biting suspense, and at the end of the fight, I love his understated reassurance. Yup, he'd done that a time or two himself, indeed. Real guys here! Speaking of which, I love the reaction to Hurin suggesting that he learn to cook to improve the Ranger's field rations.

I love how you've portrayed Hurin's thoughtful nature. The line of discussion about the Shire explored a lot of unanswered (to Halbarad, at this time, anyway) questions. I like how this dovetails with the events of "Hands," when Halbarad's willingness to blindly trust Aragorn in this regard wavers and then is reaffirmed. And this line from Hurin almost leapt out of my next chapter - I don't think it's ever wrong to do the right thing, and it is the right thing to help people who need it. ( I should have just let you write it; it might have been done by now.)

Most of all, I love the relationship between Halbarad and Hurin. This is the kid that isn't like him (much); this is the kid who makes him wonder what might be in himself that he didn't know was there. I like seeing that Halbarad realizes dreamers are important. I think sometimes there's a sense that parents can't appreciate a child who's of a different temperament from themselves, and this story is a wonderful reminder that that doesn't have to be the case. I really like, too, how Hurin is complex and multi-dimensional. He's a dreamer but not a Central Casting one - he goes willingly into his first battle and proves himself capable and brave. And I also like that as much as Hurin learns from his father, Halbarad learns from him as well. I like to imagine that it was the influence of this different, dreamy son that allowed Halbarad to finally see the apparition in the circle.

This was a wonderful, wonderful gift, Karen, and to answer Bodkin and a few other people, I would eagerly schedule another birthday for more of this.



Author Reply: with jutting hair and all (that part's not mine, but I might have to borrow it).

I don't think you've given us a description of Hurin yet, have you? He's not even been present, only discussed, right? And feel free to give him wild hair, but remember, he had been running in the other direction from the shadowy children. That'd make my hair stand up too...that and humidity.

The, uh...reference to the chubby baby was not intended to be you...I'm mean, not really. Most babies are kind of chubby, especially the late ones. They just hang out and grow until they can't avoid the whole birthing thing anymore. I pictured Hurin as being a content child, lost in his own world and mostly happy. But he does want to please his father. Alagos, according to his creator, was born with a sword in his hand. Hurin must have felt pressured to live up to his brother's standards, but Hurin was still himself, calm and analytical.

Characterizing Brandol was a little harder. He's not been around much either so I made up the part about him being a tad clumsy at times--except when he had a sword in his hand. My plan was to show that Halbarad really liked and respected the old goat, but was amused by him at times. And if I'm way off in the characterization, remember that was Cranky! Halbarad's opinion on that night. Not necessarily reliable.

Of all the characterizations you nailed in this story, the one that could slide right past if you're not looking tickled me - Halbarad musing that his father was not one to repeat fanciful stories. That's exactly how I picture him - there was a man who did NOT have a dreamer gene.

I'm so relieved that was on target. I went back and added that part in and I had a few other lines about Halbarad's dad that I took out because I thought it slowed the story down too much. Father/son relationships was a theme, but the two times I mentioned Halbarad's father I thought--hoped--gave the reader enough to get a picture of Halbarad's father and how he had influenced Halbarad. What that influence was, I guess is up to reader interpretation.

The orc fight was a little short, but what else was there to say but the rangers won? :>) I didn't have any rangers to spare so they had to. I've never seen real battle, obviously, but I would think the carnage would be difficult to see even if the dead guys were the enemy...and orcs. Still seems to me that it'd be awfully nasty. I can see where it might a fellow a tad queasy. I figured Halbarad could identify with that. And yeah, I don't think Hurin is going to turn the rangers into galloping gourmets. But I'm sure they'd be fine with him doing the cooking.

I've loved Hurin since the first moment you mentioned him in your story. I got visions of this delightful kid with a smile on his face and an intelligent, thoughtful nature. A ranger philosopher in the making. I also wondered if Halbarad was somewhat stymied by him, proud of him, but a little bewildered by where this kid came from. (We know now where Hurin got his dreamer genes. Maybe.) At any rate, I enjoyed exploring Halbarad's relationship with him. I hoped to take Halbarad on a journey on discovering his son going from 'a boy' to the first days as a 'young man' and learning to not only recognize Hurin's differences, but to also value them.

The little girl, Annie, I like to call her since I expected her to break out into the chorus of 'Tomorrow' any second, was the full circle. (When she finished 'Tomorrow', she could offer her rendition of 'The Circle of Life' from the 'Lion King'. I hear she's appearing weekends at the Prancing Pony.) I think you're right though that Halbarad would never have seen her, or even known about her, had he not been so open at that point to Hurin's dreamy nature. Halbarad was back where he started--at the stream--but he was a different person.

I'm so glad you liked the story. It's odd to take someone else's characters out to play. (At least we don't have to worry about Tolkien unless he shows up in the circle with Annie.) I have to say it was a lot of fun. I've been in love with your Halbarad since the first line of 'Hands' and my fondness for him has only grown. Thanks for not sending me to my room for abducting them without permission.

Happy Birthday to Ray's Dog's favorite ranger. I like you pretty good too. :>)

daw the minstrelReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/1/2006
I don't know what Meckinock thinks, but I think you've caught the tone of her Halbarad quite nicely. (Being skewered by an arrow would not improve his mood.) And Elrohir is nicely fey. But what I particularly liked is the way you have with words, Karen. I'm deeply jealous.

Look at this description:

In the light of the full moon, his skin paled to a muted blue and the hollows of his face were dark shadows. His hair jutted in all directions, spiked by sweat and haste

That's wonderful! It's telling and it's not overdone. I like the verb 'paled' and unusual and accurate observation that in the moonlight Hurin's face is a 'muted blue.'

And this little fact:

When he was born, he had arrived late and fat and content to start a new life in the world.

Even little phrases like this:

the old and odd

I moaned with envy.

Lovely, lovely story.
It tells us so much about this boy and does it quite subtly.

Author Reply: I don't know what Meckinock thinks, but I think you've caught the tone of her Halbarad quite nicely.

Oh, thank you! No one does Halbarad as well as Meckinock, but if I was able to give just the slightest hint of recognition of hers, then I'm thrilled beyond reason.

I'm so pleased that you liked the story. Hurin simply showed up one day with his hair standing on end and looking like a wrath himself, so....I ran with it. He was looking a little blue around the gills. I'm so glad you thought the description worked.

And you do too have a way with words. A wonderful way. Let me just say here and now that you have been a big influence on my writing--the positive things. I'll claim the crap. I've learned so much from you, Nilmandra and the ranger. I don't know what I'd do without all of you to cheer me on and to help me 'fix' the errors of my ways. To have such kind compliments from you means a lot to me. Thank you and thank you again. You're a darn good beta and a darn good friend. All of you are. And Meckinock is probably so glad you got stuck with the beta duties for this story. :>) She got a break.

Again, I'm glad you enjoyed the story and I'm particularly glad that Hurin came through to you. I just LOVE him. The ranger created a wonderful character in him.

Thanks again.

French PonyReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/1/2006
What a wonderful story! I think this is one of the more absorbing things I've read in a long time. I love the way it melds the idea of a ghost story and a little slice of life, and it just seems perfectly natural to be that way. You get a real feel for Halbarad, both the thoughtful man that he is on the inside, and the slightly rougher, gruffer exterior that he shows to others. And I like the glimpse we get at how young Rangers train. Hurin has so much personality, he really seems like a real boy here.

And then there are the ghostly children. It's just like Middle-earth to have more to it than meets the eye. And not even the Elves can explain all mysteries. Some things just Are.

Author Reply: I think this is one of the more absorbing things I've read in a long time.

Oh, wow! I'm floored. Thank you.

You get a real feel for Halbarad, both the thoughtful man that he is on the inside, and the slightly rougher, gruffer exterior that he shows to others.

I think there's a Bob Pearblossom in Halbarad trying to get out, but he shoves the poor guy back in with his rough exterior. :>) One of things I hoped to capture with Halbarad was his role as a father. In my mind, he's a good dad, but he didn't relate quite as easily to Hurin as he did the older two kids. I also wanted to allow Halbarad to see Hurin in a different light, not just as a dreamy youngest son, but as a unique person with something important to offer. Intellectually, I suppose we know that about children, but going from seeing offspring as a child to seeing them as growing up is an adjustment that comes over time and sometimes in short burst of insight. Halbarad does have a lot to proud of in Hurin.

And not even the Elves can explain all mysteries. Some things just Are.

That was kind of fun, wasn't it? Even Elrohir was stumped.

Thanks, FP. I greatly appreciate the review and your kind words. Made my day, you did.


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