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Once Upon a Meadow  by Grey Wonderer 9 Review(s)
PIppinfan1988Reviewed Chapter: Prologue on 1/18/2010
Dear Mr. Laaambert Woolrich,

I am so glad that you have warned us readers about the hobbits. It was very thoughtful of you. Who knew that hobbits would end up in this story? I suppose it was inevitable. My goodness, what will they be doing next -- going on adventures? Oh, but they are darling, aren't they? :-) Perhaps a young Tookling or Brandybuck won't go amiss. Please give my reagards to Cloud!

Author Reply: Dear Pippinfan1988,
I am very glad to see that you understand just how very sneaky hobbits are. I do wish they would go somewhere, even if it is an adventure of some kind, though I suppose if they do that, then someone will get the idea to write a book about them! We sheep just cannot win.

I shall tell 'Cloud' hello for you as soon as I determine exactly which of the Clouds you mean. That farmer's lass named about twenty of our flock Cloud. It is most confusing. Sometimes I believe that hobbits can't tell us apart.

May your meadow be filled with sweet clover,

Mr. Lambert Woolrich XVIII

PS I do like the way in which you wrote my name. It is very musical that way. Oh, and I see that whoever named you isn't very original either. I am number XVIII but you are number 1988! You must come from a very large flock.

Baggins BabeReviewed Chapter: Prologue on 1/17/2010
Dear Mr Woolrich,

I'm afraid you have discovered what many fan-fiction writers have learned to their cost. Hobbits will sneak in wherever they can, even into stories which should be solely about sheep.

Thank you for the warning, but I'm sure nothing will pull this reader's attention away from the true stars of the story. I have always found sheep to be intelligent and helpful creatures who tolerate the rudeness (and sometimes harsh treatment) of humans with more kindness than we deserve.

I remain yours respectfully,

Baggins Babe
Shire Chronicler & Historian

Author Reply: Dear Baggins Babe,

I am very glad to know that you, at least, will be reading this story with the sheep in mind. I am certain that you will find it more interesting if you just ignore the hobbits completely while reading.

Thank you for your kind words about sheep.

May you always have plenty of grass to eat,

Lambert Woolrich XVIII

Mum's the WordReviewed Chapter: Prologue on 1/16/2010
Dear Master Woolrich,

Thank you for your eloquent warning. We readers know that you and your flock would never try to pull the wool over our eyes.

I go now, fully forewarned and thereby forearmed, to read this tale.

Gratefully yours,

Author Reply: Dear Mum,

Your use of the phrase, 'pull the wool over our eyes' amused me greatly. : )

I thank you for understanding and for stopping by to read.

May your meadow be safe and filled with lovely grasses,

Lambert Woolrich XVIII

LarnerReviewed Chapter: Prologue on 1/13/2010
ONLY you can get me laughing as much at the introduction and disclaimers as at the story! I WAS drinking Dr. Pepper as I began reading, and had to grab a paper towel rather quickly, while my nose is still burning!

Author Reply: Sorry about the Dr. Pepper. I am glad this gave you a laugh though. Thanks for reviewing. Lambert will be pleased. : )

AndreaReviewed Chapter: Prologue on 1/13/2010
Dear Mr. Woolrich,

Thank you very much for the advice, but I can assure you it is not necessary for as a matter of fact I don't mind if one or two hobbits appear in my sheep story. Those little guys can be quite funny at times, you know.
After all, I know that the important characters in this story are the sheep!

BTW, I have a colleague who was named after you, Lambert, by his parents.

Yours faithfully,

Fan Fiction Reader

Author Reply: Dear Andrea,
I am glad that the hobbits are not a problem for you and I am very pleased that you know the value of sheep. That is always good to hear. So many people miss our importance.

Your colleague is very lucky to have been named after a sheep. Not many folks can claim that honour.

All the best,

Lambert Woolrich XVIII

PS Thank you for reading this very important prologue.

poppymuddyfootReviewed Chapter: Prologue on 1/13/2010
LOL! I haven't even got to the story yet and I'm laughing so hard my boss is getting worried. (Don't worry, I'm on my lunch hour, so I'm allowed to read fanfiction.) Just getting to read your introductions is a joy, and your stories are just icing on the cake.
I will review the story after I've read it, but I just wanted to let you know the creativity you use in your disclaimers in appreciated, too.

Author Reply: Thank you so much. Some time back I got bored with my disclaimers and since then I have tried to make them interesting and if not interesting, at least different. LOL
I am glad that this one won't be getting you fired. Thank you so much for reading and for this lovely review. It's always so nice to read that someone is enjoying these.

CeleritasReviewed Chapter: Prologue on 1/13/2010
Dear Mr. Woolrich,

Might I respectfully request that this letter is unnecessary on this website? I understand your concern; however, the fact that you are posting this tale on a Lord of the Rings fan fiction archive implies the preponderance of some non-ovine entity in this tale. I rather suspect that most people clicked on the story expecting to read something of Hobbits, or at least Men or Elves, or possibly even Dwarves (though what Dwarves would be doing on a meadow is anyone's guess!).

Perhaps you initially posted this tale at a sheep-fiction archive, and only posted here as an afterthought, merely copying and pasting the disclaimer from that site, as this disclaimer is most fitting for any audience expecting to read a tale about naught but sheep.

However, in the future (should this unfortunate circumstance happen to arise again), maybe you should tailor each disclaimer to the intended audience of the site. This is not intended to be offensive but merely a bit of constructed criticism.

I remain your humble servant,

Miss C. Sagitta
Shire Historian, 4th Age
Infernal Busybody

Author Reply: Dear Infernal Busybody,

A Sheep-fiction Archive sounds like a great idea to me. If you happen to start one or if you know of one already in existence, please send me the link to it. It would be a shear joy to find some well-written sheep tales!

I did *try* to tailor this disclaimer to 'the intended audience of the site'. I was going for a bit of humour on this one and so I tried to set that sort of tone with it. If it missed its mark, then I am very sorry. Sheep don't always understand what humans find amusing. Those who go about on two legs are often a mystery to me.

Thank you for your non-offensive constructive criticism. I shall file it away for future consideration.

Thank you for reading,

Lambert Woolrich XVIII

PS May you never be caught wool-gathering in unfriendly meadows and may your flock increase.

eilujReviewed Chapter: Prologue on 1/13/2010
"this story contains hobbits" -- Oh my! Thanks for the warning.... I'll be brave and persevere.

Author Reply: You are most welcome. : )
Thanks for reading in spite of the hobbits.

Lambert Woolrich XVIII

DreamflowerReviewed Chapter: Prologue on 1/13/2010
Dear Lambert:

(And may I say, you have a fine name! Very appropriate for a sheep!) I don't think you need to worry about the hobbits having wandered into your tale-- they simply lend a bit of flavor to such a wonderful sheep story! After all, it is by the contrast with the hobbits that the sheep are shown to be such intelligent and witty creatures, most especially those particular hobbits in that particular state make sheep seem positively brilliant by comparison!

Author Reply: Dear Dreamflower,

Thank you for your words of praise for my name. It has been in the family for many shearing seasons as you can tell by the number which follows it.

I can tell that you are a reader with an appreciation for sheep. It is very delightful to read your words regarding sheep. You are the very type of reader that I had hoped would find this story.

You seem very intelligent for a human and I hope that some of your future stories will contain sheep. You seem to understand us quite well.

All of the best,

Lambert Woolrich XVIII

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