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|The Eagle on the Ramparts by Canafinwe||7 Review(s)|
|obsidianj||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/28/2015|
|Petty indignities indeed. The guards have way too much fun at the expense of Thorongil. I have the feeling morale within the troups is kind of low, when they have nothing better to do than gawking at the newcomer. To generate that much interest, new recruits coming because of Ecthelion's policy have to be pretty rare. If there would be new people every week the soldiers would loose interest. |
I'm not sure that letter will do Thorongil much good. It just seems to pick the interest of Denethor in a bad way. I come to dislike your Denethor heartily, but I like his secretary who is not afraid of him and tells him as it is.
|quodamat||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 10/29/2015|
|Indignities indeed! Yikes. You certainly captured the extreme awkwardness of the "strip and let us poke at you" aspect of proceedings: I was shuddering and twitching just reading it! I was very struck by the contrast between this scene and the post-journey check-up from Elrond near the end of "A Long and Weary Way." What a difference compassion makes!|
Speaking of which, something I deeply appreciate about your writing is the empathy for suffering and (for lack of a better term) downtrodden people that is woven throughout your stories. For example, Thonongil's thought about how awful this ordeal must be for those who don't know the language was very poignant. I've sometimes thought along similar lines when dealing with things like airport security and customs/immigration processes: things that are stressful and sometimes confusing for me, though they're in my native language - I can't even imagine how gut-wrenching the same things must be for speakers of other languages. I find it very humbling. Anyway, thanks for writing stories with a moral dimension that make me think and reflect on real life.
Author Reply: It's good to know I captured it, unpleasant though it was, and that the contrast struck you. Most of all I appreciate your lovely comments about the underlying moral reflections in my work. Thorongil's empathy extends far beyond his own folk; that is one of his greatest strengths, and one that in the end proves almost more important than any other to his early contributions to the Quest.
|Celeth||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 10/29/2015|
|"More fodder for the Enemy's vanguards" indeed! What a heartless way of looking at the poor weary soldiers who stand between Gondor and its Enemy. And so sad that some leaders, even today, have this attitude. So starkly different from the compassionate way that Aragorn treats everyone, even his captives. And speaking of Aragorn...too bad Denethor doesn't have a dash of the foresight that is one of the gifts of the children of Luthien. Then again, it was fortunate for Aragorn that Denethor didn't know who he really was at this point. |
Poor Aragorn, having to undress before so many people, and in such circumstances. I hate doing it in the relative comfort and privacy of the doctor's consulting room. Having to do it in front of an indifferent Captain and so many prying eyes would be a hundred times worse.
I am sorry if I sounded impatient for the story. If you must know, I check this website about two or three times a day, hoping for a new story, or even better, a new chapter of my favorite stories =)
Author Reply: Don't worry about sounding impatient! There's nothing quite so motivating as hearing from readers who are clamouring for the next instalment. It's VERY encouraging!
Happily this is not Denethor's universal sentiment towards his soldiers, but he is very scornful of his father's foreign recruits. The stark difference is important, of course: what is Denethor in the Book but a foil for Aragorn? (and a tiny, tiny glimpse at a worst-case scenario...)
The search serves a greater purpose to the story, though in context it was completely unnecessary. Familiarity has numbed me to the consulting-room shyness, but well do I remember the days!
Thank you for the wonderful feedback. It's hugely appreciated, and makes posting a joy!
|Larner||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 10/28/2015|
|I do hope that Denethor does not withhold the letter overlong. As for the treatment offered to Thorongil--it is rather shameful, if at least somewhat understandable. But I agree--not to bring his own sword when offering to become a mercenary is unusual!|
Author Reply: I am glad it makes sense. The story of the missing sword is in the next chapter -- because of course he possessed one in Rohan. As for the letter... *noncommittal shrug*
|UTfrog||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 10/28/2015|
|So Denethor besides disliking sell swords on principle also is suspicious of Throngil due to the letter. Poor Throngil can't catch a break. I do hope he gets breakfast soon. Thank you. |
Author Reply: So many folks rooting for Thorongil to be fed! It's very endearing. As for Denethor... yup. Yup.
|someone||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 10/28/2015|
|I've been waiting for Thorongil and Denethor or Ecthelion to meet for a while now, and will apparently have to wait a chapter or three more. It is realistic that a strange wanderer is not brought to see the Steward at once, but just a little bit frustating for a reader! Anyway, I'm looking forward to what is in the letter (perhaps that will bring Thorongil to the citadel...) and seeing if Thorongil's new comrades in the Tenth Company are as pleasant as the soldiers in Rohan.|
The chapter title was very fitting. There was no reason to humiliate Thorongil in front of the soldiers, and there was no real need to send the Easterling's company away from the city. I'm quite surprised that Thorongil is not even more upset, but, as you said before, he is a patient man. Even when he is suspected of stealing silver spoons. It must be quite different from life in Imladris and among the dunedain.
Telpiriel sounds like an interesting woman, and I have suspicions that we are going to see more of her and her unborn baby in the future.
Poor, hungry Thorongil. Are you going to feed him soon or will there be more petty indignities before that?
Author Reply: I *am* trying for realism. ;-) Still, I can definitely see the frustration! Thorongil is beginning to share it...
Feedback on chapter titles is always appreciated! Sometimes I know when they're 'just right', but more often I wonder! The indignities stretch a little further, too: Telpiriel has her own in her enforced inaction, though the family is trying to make light of it.
I couldn't resist the spoon-thief allusion. Sometimes you just *have to* do these things!
I can't tell you Thorongil's feeding schedule, I'm afraid. He hadn't counted on being detained, that much is certain..
|Matt||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 10/28/2015|
|Wow, nice story and moving forward rapidly at least where posting is concerned. I think you overplay thorongil's lowliness at first, something which I believe is at least partially fanon, but you do soften it with the letter he carries. Given the way you have him arrive, his treatment seems very "reasonable" given the time and the kind of people our mysterious sell-sword is dealing with. Thanks for your hard work on this, looking forward to future installments.|
Author Reply: Thank you for the lovely feedback! I love to linger in story-time, so I try to make up for it with frequent posts. ;-)
I greatly appreciate the constructive comment, too! Unfortunately I use all of my screentime for writing, so I know very little what is out there in terms of 'fanon'. I chose this route because it seemed fitting for Aragorn's character: to desire not only to learn what the lowly experience, but to gauge also the mettle of his Steward.
Again, I thank you! I'm glad you're looking forward to more.