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| A Brandybuck Turns Baggins by Iorhael | 49 Review(s) |
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| JULES6 | Reviewed Chapter: 8 on 1/9/2004 |
| I read this paragraph and was just cheering for the dear old hobbit: “I refuse to hear such silly excuses!” Bilbo pronounced his words clearly and even more loudly. “Frodo is under your care as long as he’s here no matter what! Don’t give me ridiculous stories of someone forging my writing only to fool him and make the lad run away. Frodo is not that foolish. And it is your job to make sure something like that does not happen. How can Frodo flee from under your nose without you knowing it!?” GO GET EM BILBO - but then I remembered it was Merry and didn't want anything too bad to happen to him - maybe just a few angry words from Frodo and Bilbo - his actions were driven by his sense of despair of losing Frodo as a friend. JULES Author Reply: Yes, yes. MBradford my beta reminded me the things Bilbo might do to Merry, considering how Merry and Bilbo are like. It's not likely that Bilbo will be so harsh because of the reasons you wrote and Bilbo's character itself. | |
| JULES6 | Reviewed Chapter: 7 on 1/9/2004 |
| This paragraph just made you feel butterflies in your stomach it was so good and angsty. Through the wet surroundings, soggy land, leaves with water clinging on their pointy tips, and damp yet refreshing air, the hooded figure was carrying Frodo along through the night. Sometimes cradled in the man’s arms and at other times draped gently against his shoulder, Frodo was warmly wrapped in the human’s spare blanket, leaving only his face unhidden. I like the dream sequence where Frodo thinks he is back with his parents and then that dream is shattered in the blink of an eye - just adds to the tension he is feeling and the cautiousness when he wakes in an unknown place with strangers at his door. JULES Author Reply: And butterflies in my stomach to read such thorough reviews. I remember when thinking about what I wanted to write in this chapter, I closed my eyes and really wanted to feel how Frodo actually felt. And I did that in a cab on the way to work. ^_^ | |
| JULES6 | Reviewed Chapter: 6 on 1/9/2004 |
| I just love this paragraph: Apprehension was clear in his face. Sara seldom gave him any punishments, but once he did, Merry had not been able to sit for days. And child? That was not a good sign. It's like when you got called by your full name when you were a kid - you knew you were in trouble - now I do it to my own kids. You can really feel the pain that Frodo is in and the misery he is experiencing walking until exhaustion in the rain. Bilbo's new mission has a sense of urgency about it without him even being aware yet that Frodo is missing and hurt. Just love it - great stuff. JULES Author Reply: O-oh, you've your own kids? And all this time you're a teenager or tweenager. Sorry! :) I'm so glad you love it. I can't help it making Frodo in misery. He's just so great in that kind of stories. | |
| JULES6 | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 1/9/2004 |
| It took a until the third time I read this to realise that it was Merry who wrote the letter that Frodo read - just me being a dodo - but I loved it all the same. The whole idea of Frodo walking alone in the pouring rain and storm is just great - for me anyway. Hope that ankle isn't too painful for our dear hobbit. I also like where he is wondering if Bilbo will change his mind if he turns up at Bag End - could you imagine the look on Bilbo's face - now I am giving myself ideas - tsk tsk. Keep the great writing going. JULES Author Reply: I'm trying to do justice for you by replying your reviews one by one as you've been so kind as to leave me so many words. :) Oh! I wish I'm not unclear about Merry being the letter forger. I know sometimes I'm not that sharp about writing anything. And about the twisted ankle, thanks for mentioning it! You might not believe me but I almost forgot about it. :) I wrote too many things. Ha ha. | |
| JULES6 | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 1/8/2004 |
| I love this chapter - the whole idea about if the going gets tough - then runaway. Not that I recommend that - but for Frodo - it is perfect. The fact that you added a storm, rain and his sense of self-doubt just add wonderfully to the angst. Great work. That's the evil person in me talking. JULES Author Reply: JULES... JULES... JULES... JULES... Four times pay for all, I wish. LOL. But great thanks for all the lovely words from you. And the time that you spared me. Thanks, thanks, thanks. I'm just so in love with Frodo. He inspires me so much that I can come up with all my stories. Keep writing yourself, girl. I'll be waiting for your tales. Shinta | |
| JULES6 | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 1/8/2004 |
| I really like this passage in this chapter: Frodo sighed again when he came to the library’s closed door. He would rather hide himself again behind the piles of books than face the aggravated eyes of his uncle or the leering faces of his cousins. Frodo felt somewhat tired of facing them all, tired of feeling hated, abandoned, and tired of feeling – alone. And I think that in the beginning of his life - this was very Frodo like - to shut himself away if he felt threatened or the walls closing in around him. He would prefer to experience the pain alone than to share it with others. As his journey progressed then we see a little stubbornness and self-worth creeping in at various intervals in small quantities - just enough for us to see that this usually passive and generous hobbit who grew so much because of what was happening around him. I love any references to Farmer Maggot - I am going to have a scene in my story revolving around the corn fields from the movie and having reference to him also - I love the idea of the angry farmer chasing the hobbits through his fields. Onto the net part. JULES | |
| JULES | Reviewed Chapter: 2 on 1/8/2004 |
| I have to agree with Frodo - if there is one theme throughout most writers personification of Frodo it is that he is the most unselfish of all hobbits. The fact that you had Merry calling him ungrateful would have really hurt him. Frodo was never one to speak out and demand anything from anyone, or so people would like to think. I love that the anger from Merry continued from the first chapter and then escalated as soon as the next chapter began. Frodo doesn't realise that Merry is hurting almost as badly as him, but for different reasons. Looking forward to the next part. JULES | |
| JULES6 | Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 1/8/2004 |
| Hi Iorhael, I really like the idea that Merry was feeling a little more than sad about Frodo leaving Brandy Hall. The emotions were well described - from Frodo's excitement and anticipation to Merry's thoughts about what his cousin had missed out on in Brandy Hall and towards the end - a little anger starting to creep into his reply. Very nicely done part to open with. JULES | |
| Grey Wonderer | Reviewed Chapter: 10 on 1/7/2004 |
| Leave me with another cliff-hanger! Ahhhhhhhhh! The waiting may kill me. Love Merry with Bilbo. I felt so sorry for both of them. And poor Frodo! So much to work out here, you better stop reading this and write more chapters. LOL Author Reply: Okay, okay. He he. But I have written more. It's just, psst... it's still with mu beta. :) So I hope you'll be patient and how about if I post another of my stories? | |
| JULES6 | Reviewed Chapter: 10 on 1/7/2004 |
| Hi, I haven't reviewed the previous chapters yet - but I will. I really like the angsty moment at the end of this chapter. Love that Frodo didn't think Finbar knew he was pretending and then gave himself away. I am enjoying this story very much - like I said - I will go back and tell you what other parts I liked as soon as I can. Keep up the great work. JULES Author Reply: I'm just so honored by this review though your others of course will not be warded off. ^_^ Hey, I like your story too! Author Reply: I'm just so honored by this review though your others of course will not be warded off. ^_^ Hey, I like your story too! Author Reply: I'm just so honored by this review though your others of course will not be warded off. ^_^ Hey, I like your story too! | |