October 7th, 2986 T. A.

---

Two riders are nearing the gates of Rivendell. They cloaks are muddy, and their shoulders slumped. The twins return to the house of their father – with their hands empty, and their hearts heavy – they didn’t find the one they were looking for. Their posture, the way how they lead their horses to the stables, how they slowly walk to the gate... everything expresses defeat. I cannot help myself but smile when I think of the surprise that awaits them…

It takes them too long… Slowly they wash, and change their clothes. They eat in the kitchen, and send away everyone that wants to tell them the good news. They want to be alone… Ah, it takes too long! I cannot look at them, in their dark mood. Go upstairs finally! If you only would see yourself, the expression of serious sadness, the heavy silence between you; as it envelopes you like a cloak… I cannot look at it any longer! Go and see!

There comes Glorfindel. With the authority of your teacher and mentor he breaks through the veil of silence enveloping you. The expression in his face is unreadable. “Your father wants to see you immediately. In Estel’s room…” is the only thing that he says. Ah, he plays my game with the surprise! I would pat him on the back if I could… Even the tone of his voice says that you should better obey. Now.

And it works! Quickly you look at each other, and then turn, and slowly head upstairs. The same frowns are on your faces, the same dark thoughts are running through your mind. I know the thoughts, my grandsons. How will you tell it to your father? How will you come before him with empty hands? How will you face him – and even in this room… Failure. Defeat… You do not look back. Only I see the spark in Glorfindel’s eyes…

You hesitate before the door, and look at each other for encouragement. Come on, brave warriors! You have faced orcs, beasts and men, and you didn’t waver! Finally you open the door, although the expression in your face is not very brave. Oh, but I understand… My heart would be as heavy as yours, if I didn’t know what you will find behind that door…

You see. Ah, what a sight! They still lay in one bed – Aragorn, sleeping now deeply and peacefully after his ordeal, and Elrond, embracing him protectively in sleep as he dozed off again, tired after the many hours of holding watch at the sickbed. But that is not the sight that I mean. If you only could see the look in your faces, my grandsons! Confusion, surprise, disbelief, wonder… You don’t look very bright as you stand like frozen in the door and stare open-mouthed… If only Glorfindel could see it… But I suppose he can imagine…

Then, as if some spell holding you passed, you move. Relief… Overwhelming relief pushes back all other emotions. I smile with you. With you, not at you. I never meant to, and I’m sure Glorfindel didn’t either. After all the worries and tension of these days, we both needed a respite, I think. And I’m so glad that your worries lifted, too, and the cloak of dark thoughts dissolved in the golden light of fire in this room. For a moment I wonder why my own mood is so bright today. It is an unusual feeling. When did I last feel true joy? No, I don’t remember. It is too long... But, for some reason, I want to laugh today; I want to embrace the whole world. I want to embrace you, my grandsons...

Before you even reach the bed, Elrond wakes. For a moment you look at each other. He smiles. “You are late, my sons…” I see the echo of my joy in his eyes.

“Adar… How? When?” is your first question. He motions for you to sit down, and then he explains, shortly and quietly, to not wake the one of his sons sleeping in his arms. He does not mention the light that guided him. It is not the right time yet… For a moment silence veils the room. The joy is still in my heart, but it becomes more solemn, and quiet. It is the joy of being able to help...

“Oh, little brother…” you whisper in a choked voice. He does not hear you. He sleeps. A much deserved sleep… He looks so frail, so weak. The unshed tears in your voice discern how close you were to losing him. Oh, little brother… But it is over, and he is safe. Rojoice with me, my grandsons! No, you can't yet - there is still a trace of shadow in your heart, the thought on what he had to go through while you couldn't find him...

“Please, get some rest, Adar. We will stay with him,” you say, and Elrond hesitates. I know… the look of panic in Aragorn’s eyes when he wanted to leave is still fresh in his mind, as is in mine. He looks at you, a long look, and then he nods slowly. I watch you too, and I see what he does: the relief of an unexpected finding after a futile search, but beneath it, a hint of failure – it were not you who found him. And desire to amend the supposed mistake, to be useful, to be able to help... Oh, I understand...

“Maybe I should,” Elrond says finally. “He may need me later… But…do not leave him alone.”

Your faces brighten a bit, almost offended for the thought of leaving your brother. Elrond guessed correctly... I smile. Yes, he knows his children... as I know mine. He loosens his embrace reluctantly. Aragorn stirs, and moans from his sleep, but he doesn’t wake, and soon his breath evens again. Elrond lingers for a while longer, but then, with many instructions, and one last long look, he leaves.

I see him standing beyond the door with a thoughtful look. Then he looks at me - and smiles, shrugging his shoulders. "Could I do something else?" tells his look. I laugh. No, my son, you couldn't. But they are right in one thing: you should get some rest... Aragorn is in good hands.

***

The twins sit at each side of the bed, silent and watchful like two sentries. Not minding that they are home, their faces promise punishment to everyone who would want harm to their little brother. As if they wanted to compensate that they couldn’t protect him before…

The hours pass, and they almost do not move. The silent guardians… And then: Aragorn wakes. In a moment they are at his side, and lean over him. He tries to focus his eyes. “El…?”

“Yes, little brother, we are with you. How are you?” A pause.” I thought you would be able to discern us after all this time…”

He smiles, and, for a moment, the lines of suffering in his face fall away. “Of course, El…ladan. I’m glad… you’re here…”

Elladan nods with a smile of his own. "We are. But you should come home more often..." But there is concern behind that smile. "Are you in pain?" he asks.

"It's... much better now..." Aragorn reaches to him weakly, and Elladan takes his hand. It is so thin and bony… Elladan frowns. “How long since you’ve last eaten, Estel?”

“I… don’t know…”

Oh, but I do, I do. Too long…

“Oh Estel… I will bring you something from the kitchen.”

“…and I will stay with you while Elladan is away,” adds Elrohir almost immediately.

Aragorn smiles faintly, and curls in the bed. So he already knows, and feels, that this time Rivendell is no illusion. That is good… With such guardians, everybody would feel safe...

“Are you thirsty?” Elrohir asks, and Aragorn nods.

“Good, because Ada left here some tea, in case you wake….”

Aragorn moans.

“He was very insistent in his orders…” Elrohir continues sympathetically.

Aragorn sighs resigned. “Do... what you must... brother…“

Elrohir laughs. “I really must. But I’m sure that Elladan will bring something tastier, so hold on for a while. But until then…” he says almost apologetically.

From the look in Aragorn’s face I see that I really should be more careful about promising tea to someone, when Elrond is involved… But it helps, and that is what matters. Already his eyes are brighter, and the pain lessened. I know it, and he knows it too. And so he drinks without complaint. Soon Elladan comes with a bowl of steaming broth. Yes, that is what I had in mind when I promised you warmth and safety for that few steps. It feels so unreal now… But oh, it was real then. Too real.

Aragorn smiles, and Elrohir helps him to prop on the pillows. He even reaches for the spoon with the bandaged fingers. The tea really helps, it seems. But his hand trembles too much. He is too weak yet. Without a word Elladan takes the spoon from him, and begins feeding him gently. A true big brother… It will take much more meals to fill the sunken cheeks, but it is good to see the beginning.

After the bowl is almost empty, he helps Aragorn to lie down again, and strokes his hair. For a moment he is quiet. He looks out of the window, to the mountains. “It is good to have you home…" he says finally. "We thought you lost. We looked everywhere, and we couldn’t find you….” His voice trails off, as he beholds the sudden look of pain in Aragorn’s face, the look turned to something that they can’t see. I am the only one who understands. I have seen…

For a moment he is back in the valley, and the sounds of battle sound in the brisk air – the voices of his brothers, mixed with the clang of steel and cries of orcs. He calls – but the wind tears the cries from his lips, and makes them a part of its howling. He tries to rise – but his strength betrays him. The sounds of battle silence. The receding hoof beats. Quiet… They left. Nobody will help him now. There is no reason to fight anymore…

“Estel? Estel!”

His eyes focus on his brothers’ faces again. He shivers.

“Estel, what is wrong? Should we call Adar?”

He shakes his head, as if waking from a bad dream. “No. No… it’s nothing. Just… a bad memory. I’m glad… you are here…” he smiles slightly, but I can still see the echoes of the memory in his eyes.

“Shhh, little brother. It’s alright. Nothing can harm you here. It’s over…”

He nods, and closes his eyes tiredly. Oh Aragorn… You will not tell them. You will not tell them how close they were. You will not tell them about the pain and despair of their leaving. They would never forgive themselves… you know them too good. It’s better if they do not know… Even now, under the weight of the memories, you care for them more then for yourself… Who are you, Aragorn? You are like a memory of old times and noble deeds. You are like an echo of Elros’ and Elendil’s voice, like a kingly blade that was tried by the fire, and reforged for great deeds. Rest easy, my child. Your brothers watch over you… And I watch over you all…