Disclaimer:  see chapter 1

Author’s note:

Again many thanks to Erulisse and to Selene Aduial for beta reading this story for me. 

Chapter 14:  forgive me

After Elrond had left, Thranduil looked at his wife questioningly. “I had no idea that this procedure would drain him to this degree, least of all be dangerous for him,” Elarinya said with a guilty tone. Directing her gaze toward her son still lying completely still on the bed she dropped her voice to a near whisper. “Nonetheless I’m grateful that he did this.”

Not sure how to respond and still irritated over the accusation he had seen in Glorfindel’s eyes the King stepped behind his wife and encircled her with his arms. Together they watched the slight rise and fall of their son’s chest. However, the King could not detect any other improvement.

Sitting down on the bed Thranduil took Elarinya’s hand into his. “It’s my fault,” he said suddenly while still gazing at the pale face of the young elf. “I’ve treated him unjustly. He was right to call for Elrond. I see this now.”

Turning so she could look at her husband Elarinya took a deep breath. “You could not have foreseen this, but we should have guessed. Galadhion was always very determined to please you and to get your approval.” The King nodded. He hoped that he would have the chance to set things right.

Thranduil looked up startled when the door opened, and Thornil stepped inside after he had left the parents just a few moments before. “Do you need a distraction?” he asked quietly while motioning for the royal couple to follow him. The King and Queen furrowed their brows while an apprentice healer hurried over to take their place watching over their son.

Reluctantly Thranduil and Elarinya followed the healer down the corridor and a small smile crept over the Queen´s face when she noticed where they were heading. Thranduil had also noticed which way the healer was heading.

When they reached their goal the healer stepped aside and the parents rushed past him and opened the door to the room of their youngest. The sight that greeted them lifted their downcast moods almost immediately. Saeron was sitting on his bed and let out a shriek of delight in seeing his parents rushing toward him and enveloping him in a tight embrace. Thornil closed the door with a relieved smile.

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After Thranduil had convinced his lively elfling that he had to stay in bed a few days longer and Elarinya had promised to stay and read to their son, the King left the chamber quietly. With a sigh he leaned against the corridor wall next to the door for support. The emotional ups and downs were sapping his strength. He could not remember when he had last eaten or slept properly, but this, he realized with a grimace, was true for many others around him too.

He was of course overjoyed that Saeron was progressing so well. Children were amazing. A few days ago they were not sure if the elfling would survive and today he had already demanded to be allowed outside. Relieved from this worry, what was left was his concern about Galadhion. Yes, the injuries of the young elf were grave, but they should not have been life-threatening to this degree. And on top of everything else was his concern for the many sick children in his realm.

Thornil had briefly informed him that the distribution was going well and nearly everyone had been provided with the antidote by now. However, even the King knew that this was no guarantee for the childrens’ survival. If the illness had advanced too much the antidote would come too late. He was still receiving reports about the death of sick elflings at various villages. Tomorrow he would inspect the process of delivering himself and he hoped his presence in the cottages further away would stir hope again. The deaths he could not undo, though, and a thick cloud of grief still hung over the great forest and would continue to for a long time.

When he heard someone approach Thranduil straightened up and tensed when he recognized the Balrog-Slayer coming down the corridor carrying a tray with a bowl and several towels in his hands. The scowl was still in place on the blond´s face and it had, if this was even possible, intensified. The King furrowed his brow. He did still not know why Glorfindel was so furious. Never being one to back away from a confrontation, he stepped away from the wall and into the warrior’s path; not that Glorfindel had not already spotted him.

Briefly Elrond’s advisor glared at him but at least he stopped. He looked at the King questioningly. “May I have a word with you?” Thranduil asked still not sure what to make of the other’s demeanour. Considering the request and rebalancing the tray in his hands Glorfindel nodded and Thranduil motioned to a door on the opposite side of the corridor, a small office he used occasionally.

After he had closed the door and Glorfindel had set the tray on a nearby shelf Thranduil stepped in front of the other elf and looked him in the eye. Glorfindel looked back at him levelly. Taking a deep breath and reigning in his rising anger Thranduil took a step closer. “Glorfindel, I have still not really comprehended what happened earlier. Elrond poured healing energy into my son’s body; that much is clear to me. But why is he so weakened and, most of all pray tell me, why are you so furious? Are you angry that my son will survive?” he asked challengingly, hoping to draw out the warrior.

With an angry glare Glorfindel stepped back. “Of course not,” he shot back. “But you have not once asked about Elrond nor have your healers had the grace to ask if we might need something, thank you very much.”

This time it was Thranduil who stepped back with confusion. What was going on here? What had he overlooked? Why should his healers look after Elrond? A very bad feeling began to spread in his stomach but he did still not grasp the meaning. Still irritated by the warrior’s attitude Thranduil took a deep breath. “I would be very glad, if you would tell me now where the problem lies”, he declared the irritation clearly visible in his voice.

Glorfindel narrowed his eyes. “Then I will tell you. Elrond was beyond tired and drained from the long hours of preparing the antidote and caring for the elfling and he was by no means in any condition to perform a healing trance. He has widely overstepped the border where the procedure would endanger his own life!”

Thranduil stared at the golden warrior in dismay. This he had not known. How could he? He had never seen the healer in action before and knew nothing about the after-effects of such doings. Seeing the King’s stunned expression Glorfindel´s anger vanished as quickly as it had flared up. He knew that the King was not really the target of his anger, besides anger was not the right word. Concern…the feeling of helplessness and fear for his friend’s life described it much better.

“I’m sorry Thranduil, I did not mean to vent my anger at you, I only…” he trailed off and sighed. The King swallowed. The many days of emotional strain had left them all on edge. He stepped closer and laid a hand on the other’s forearm. “No, Glorfindel, it is I who has to apologize. I have not thanked Elrond for rescuing my youngest and now I’ve made the same mistake again with Galadhion; not to mention my not having thanked him for the help he has given all the other elves in my realm with the antidote he developed.” Thranduil lowered his eyes. “I have not even thanked you for coming with me to help rescue the patrol.”

Hearing the real regret in the King’s voice and seeing the remorse in the green eyes Glorfindel let out a deep breath. “We are all emotionally drained at the moment. Now, I must go and look after Elrond.”

Hearing the deep concern in the other’s voice the King looked up. “Can I accompany you? I would very much like to speak to him.” Looking at Glorfindel and expecting a confirmation Thranduil frowned again at the bewilderment he could see back on the warrior’s face.

“You can come, of course, but when I left him he was unconscious.” Without a further word the Imladris elf turned, took the tray off the shelf it was on and was out of the door before Thranduil could even blink. Now understanding the other’s anger and concern Thranduil let out a breath. Closing his eyes briefly the King followed the blond elf determined to begin setting things right.

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When Thranduil reached the dimly lit room shortly after Glorfindel he hesitated before he stepped over the threshold and closed the door quietly. He did not know if he should intrude here. He was a very private person himself and treasured nothing more than keeping his privacy. But Glorfindel had not objected and he wanted very much to speak with the half-elf.

His gaze travelled around the room and he looked surprised at the still figure on the bed. Glorfindel had not exaggerated. The healer was really not accessible. Feeling all the more awkward now he turned and was about to leave when Glorfindel called him back. “Please stay Thranduil. He’s close to waking. Maybe you two should talk.”

Not knowing how Glorfindel could say that Elrond was waking from his unconscious state, Thranduil nodded nonetheless and turned back to sit in a chair opposite the bed. With bewilderment the King watched when Glorfindel took his hands from the sides of the healer’s face and called softly to him.

Not long after that the half-elf began to stir and opened his eyes. A smile broke over his friend’s face, even if the lines of worry did not leave his features.

“Welcome back, my friend,” he said softly all the while watching the dark haired elf closely. “How do you feel?” Blinking several times the half-elf tried a smile. “I’m alright Glorfindel. Only a bit tired that is all. Now move aside so that I can stand up.”

Snorting but relenting the blond warrior moved aside and reached out a hand to help his friend sit up. Thranduil averted his eyes. The healer did not only look tired he looked outright drained; exhausted, and ready to break down again.

Having sensed another’s gaze the healer looked toward the chair and raised one eyebrow. Seeing the guilt and anxiousness in the King’s face he directed his gaze back at Glorfindel. “How long have I slept?” he asked, feeling that he would not like the answer.

Sighing Glorfindel filled a glass with water and handed it to him. “You have not merely slept. You were unconscious after you collapsed. That was yesterday,” Glorfindel answered, his irritation still evident in his voice.

Before Elrond could respond, Thranduil stood and walked toward the bed. Elrond in the meantime had managed to stand despite Glorfindel’s protests. Taking a deep breath the King gathered his thoughts.

“Elrond,” he began, looking straight at the healer, “I did not realize that you were endangering your life to help Galadhion. Although I’m very grateful for what you did, I’m not sure if I will allow you to do that again. I had no idea that a healing trance would weaken you to this extent. I can only thank you and know that it will never suffice.”

Hearing the worry and real regret in the King’s voice Elrond’s features softened in sympathy, which made him look all the more tired. “No need to apologize, Thranduil but I think you thanks are misplaced. I could not really reach your son yesterday.”

Thranduil´s head snapped up at this announcement. What was this supposed to mean? The healer had clearly saved his son’s life, had he not? Remembering that he could detect no real improvement after the healer’s ministrations, save that his son’s heart did still beat, Thranduil blood ran cold.

Narrowing his eyes he looked directly at the healer hoping for some explanation. “What do you mean by that?” he asked with a careful controlled voice dreading that he would not like the answer.

Feeling his knees weaken Elrond gestured toward the small table standing beside the window. “Please sit Thranduil. I will try to explain to you why your son is still living but not really recovering.”

His frown deepening the King sat himself opposite the healer while Glorfindel stepped behind Elrond in case his friend would need his help. When the King’s patience was used up Thranduil hit his fist on the table.

“Elrond, say it plainly and simply. What’s wrong with Galadhion?” The King nearly let out a laugh when he heard himself ask that. His son was laying there a few rooms down the hall, motionless, gravely wounded and he was asking what was wrong?

Not reacting to the outburst Elrond leaned forward and looked the King directly in the eye. “Thranduil, when I poured healing energy into your son’s body I could strengthen his hroa but I could not reach his fea. He will not survive for long in this condition. He has lost his will to live!”

Thranduil jumped up with a cry of dismay. What was the healer telling him? That his son had no wish to live on? This was ridiculous! Galadhion had always been a young elf with a deep love of life, for finding the little joys in every step he took. He loved his family deeply and was loved in return. What could possibly have brought him this low that he denied returning to this life?

But as soon as these thoughts had crossed his mind, he staggered back with a moan. This was his fault entirely. He had rejected his son at a time when they had needed each other the most, when Galadhion had needed his support, not his denial.

With a pained gaze he looked at Elrond. “What have I done? With my behaviour I’ve doomed my child to death.” With a ragged breath Thranduil was grateful for the wall against his back for support.

Their victory over the plague would be a defeat if Galadhion died because of his stubbornness. How could he ever explain this to Elarinya? How could he ever look her in the eye?

Seeing the pain in the King’s eyes Elrond rose and walked toward his old friend. He laid his hand in sympathy on the other’s arm. “It’s not too late yet, Thranduil. I can try again to get a connection to your son’s fea, but I will need your help. He will not respond to me, only to you.”

Looking doubtful and hopeful at the same time the King directed his gaze first at Glorfindel and then back at Elrond. “I will do all you will ask of me, but how does this work?”

Elrond sighed and after a warning glare from his advisor he explained. “I will need a few hours rest and then I will attempt to connect with your son’s mind. I will take you along. It’s too complex to explain, you must trust me Thranduil.”

A wry smile crossed the King’s face. “What other choice do I have, but I fear Galadhion will not listen to me.”

Now Elrond smiled. “All will turn out well, you will see.”

Not really convinced Thranduil nodded anyway. After wishing Elrond a true rest he left the room in search of his wife. He anticipated a long and complicated conversation.

To be continued……………………………