91: Finrod Behind the Wheel

Gregory Sanderson returned to Fairbanks on Monday with the good wishes of the Elves. He spent part of Sunday speaking with the Wiseman Intelligence Agency, discussing ‘spy stuff’ as Derek put it. Sanderson assured them that he would make discreet enquiries at the Agency to determine if orders for the bomb-planting had originated there.

“I know from what Maddy has told me, the higher-ups aren’t too happy with what happened with Mark Farrell,” he told them. “As it is, they’re determined to get the other men released from prison as quickly and as painlessly as possible.”

“To which we have no objections,” Amroth said. “The less notice the outside world takes of us, the better.”

To that, they all agreed.

Erestor and Lindorillë began renovating the clothing store on Monday as well with the help of others, both Elves and Mortals, using start-up money lent to them by Glorfindel.

“We should be ready to reopen by the summer,” Erestor announced. “We’ll still sell apparel and apparel accessories, but we’ll have a section where our crafts can be sold as well. Linda thinks she can also find better sources for our stock than what Jacob was using and for a lot less.”

“What are you going to name the store?” Derek asked.

“We haven’t decided yet,” Erestor replied. “I’m leaning towards Linda’s myself.” He gave his wife a loving smile while she blushed.

The sixth of April came and went with the Elves celebrating their own New Year quietly while the Mortals around them concentrated on their particular religious holidays. As the northern hemisphere warmed, the snow began to recede and by mid-April spring finally came to Wiseman. Winter coats and boots were put away and people began reclaiming their gardens and the days lengthened.

One evening as the Elves were enjoying dinner around the campfire in the woods, Glorfindel turned to Finrod. “Still interested in learning to drive?”

“Of course!” Finrod answered. “We all are.”

“I’ve downloaded the driver’s manual from the Department of Motor Vehicles. You need to study it and then take a written test before you get the permit. I’ll go tomorrow and get the application form, since that can’t be downloaded. Once you pass the test, then I’ll start teaching you to drive.”

“What about the rest of us?” Valandur asked.

“Hey, one at a time,” Glorfindel said with a smile. “Actually, I think it would be better if you sign up with the driving school, but any of the Wiseman Elves can offer to teach you as well. I’ll pick up application forms for all of you and you can study the manual after Finrod. When you’re ready to take the test, just let us know and we’ll make the arrangements.”

“You’re going to get gray hairs, Loren, teaching Finrod to drive,” Vorondur said with a grin. “If you need any valium, just come to me and I’ll write out a prescription for you.”

“Thanks, Ron,” Glorfindel said while others chuckled.

“Why would you get gray hairs?” Finrod asked, apparently sincere.

“How many near heart-attacks did you have when you were teaching Finda, here, how to shoot a bow?” Glorfindel asked in return.

Finrod blinked while Findalaurë blushed. “That bad?” he finally asked.

“Oh, by a factor of a thousand,” Glorfindel replied in all sincerity and the other Wiseman Elves nodded in agreement, chuckling and taking turns regaling the Valinórean Elves with tales of their own misadventures while learning to drive for the first time.

“Brake? There’s a brake? Where?” Barahir said laughingly, miming driving with his head bent as if he were looking under the steering wheel so his eyes were definitely no longer on the road and the others joined in.

“It’s really not as easy as it looks,” Daeron assured them all.

“Well it will be good not to be dependent on others for transportation,” Finrod said. “I think I will look into purchasing horses as well.”

“Why?” Alphwen asked in confusion. “They’re even more expensive to maintain than a car.”

“Because we may need them if it becomes difficult to find fuel for the vehicles,” Finrod replied. “I have been watching some of those… ah… post-apocalyptic movies that seem to be rather popular. It is possible that when the war does come, we will encounter similar situations. Horses do not depend on fuel to operate.”

“That’s really not a bad idea,” Amroth said, “although I’m not sure how practical it will be to have horses here. Summer is not a problem, but winter will be. Conditions here are too brutal for most breeds to survive.”

“There are the Yakut,” Gilvegil said. “They are the only breed that can survive within the Arctic Circle as far as I know.”

“Yakut,” Glorfindel said, trying out the word. “Never heard of them.”

“We encountered them when we were living with the Sahka in Siberia back in the, what, fifteenth century?” Gilvegil turned to Barahir for confirmation.

Barahir nodded. “They’re a small horse, almost like ponies, very hairy. They are bred by the Sakha. They would be perfect for here, assuming we can buy any. The transport cost alone would be prohibitive, though.”

“Surely, some of them had to have been brought over here when Alaska was owned by Russia,” Daeron said. “It would be worth checking into.”

“Do that,” Glorfindel ordered. “In the meantime, we’ll start getting you all up to speed with driving.”

Finrod spent the next several evenings reading through the manual with either Glorfindel or Daeron quizzing him. By Thursday evening he felt he was ready to take the written test.

“It’s not too difficult,” Glorfindel assured him. “It mainly tests your knowledge of the rules of the road, what the various road signs mean and all that. I think you’ll be fine. We’ll go tomorrow. Once you have your permit, then I’ll give you your first lesson.”

Everyone wished Finrod good luck when he and Glorfindel set out the next morning for the DMV office, a tiny cubicle on the first floor of the town hall. Glorfindel allowed Finrod to handle the application process, the ellon proudly paying the fifteen-dollar fee out of his own pocket. The clerk handed him the test and a pencil, explained how to fill in the answers and then directed him to a long table on the other side of the office.

“When you’ve completed the test, bring it back,” she directed and Finrod nodded, going to the table where two other people, teenagers actually, were also taking the test under the watchful eyes of their parents. Finrod nodded to them as he took a seat and then concentrated on the test. Glorfindel, meanwhile, was seated in a chair nearby, reading a mystery.

Twenty minutes later, Finrod stood up and went back to the clerk, who was just finishing up with another customer. As he stood there waiting his turn, he reflected on the fact that even his atar would be appalled at the idea that his son would have to stand in a line, waiting to be served. He smiled to himself as he imagined the expression on Arafinwë’s face.

“Finished, then?”

Finrod blinked, realizing that the clerk was speaking to him and he stepped up to the counter, handing her the test. The clerk nodded, took what appeared to be a blank sheet full of holes in random spots, laying it over the test. Finrod could see that the holes corresponded to the answers he had filled in with the pencil. None of the holes were blank.

“Very good, Mr. O’Brien,” the clerk said, as she went through the test, making sure all the answers were correct. “Now we just need to have you take this eye exam and we’re all set. Just look into this and tell me what the numbers are.”

Finrod complied and saw a picture comprised of green dots with red dots forming the number nineteen. He dutifully told the clerk what he saw. Then the picture changed to another number in a different color. There were a few more like that and then he was asked to read as far down a chart of letters as he could where each row was smaller in print than the one above it. Naturally, he rattled off the letters on the very bottom row. Looking up he noticed the clerk giving him a stunned look and smiled. The Woman visibly gathered herself together.

“Ah… that was… um… fine, Mr. O’Brien. We just need to have you step over here for your photo and then we’ll issue you your learner’s permit and you’ll be all set.”

Twenty minutes later, Finrod and Glorfindel were stepping out of the building with Finrod clutching the laminated license in his hand, staring at it. “I do not care for my photograph,” he said as he and Glorfindel reached the van.

“No one does,” Glorfindel said with a chuckle as he climbed into the driver’s seat. “How did it feel, taking the test?”

“I have never taken a test before,” Finrod replied. “And I was thinking how appalled Atto would be if he ever learned of it.”

Glorfindel chuckled. “Okay, I’m going to take you over to Nolan for your first lesson.”

“Why there?” Finrod asked.

“For one thing, it’s a smaller community, so there’s not much traffic, and for another, there’s an airfield not far from there. We’ll use it so you can get a feel for driving without having to worry about traffic.”

“I did not know there was an airfield closer than Bettles,” Finrod said as Glorfindel maneuvered his way through Wiseman, picking up the narrow road that led to Nolan.

“It’s a private airfield for people with their own planes,” Glorfindel explained. “Originally Wiseman had an airfield and it was really the only way in and out of here until the access road was built connecting the town to the highway. Once that happened, the town pretty much grew so they moved the airfield to Nolan.”

They passed through Nolan, which was pretty much a single street with a few businesses and perhaps a dozen or so houses, but not much more. Glorfindel continued north past the village square and then took a side road to the east. About two miles further on, they saw a couple of large barn-like structures that Glorfindel identified as hangars. There did not seem to be anyone around and the tarmac was empty of planes. Glorfindel stopped at one end and turned off the van, removing the keys and handing them to Finrod even as he was undoing his seat belt.

“Okay, Bookstore Boy, we’ll start from the beginning. Let’s change places.”

“I do wish you would stop calling me that,” Finrod said amiably as he undid his own seat belt and opened the door to climb out.

Glorfindel just grinned as they got back into the vehicle with Finrod now behind the wheel. “Your own fault, calling Ron Captain Underpants. Okay, now let me explain what everything is. You see those two pedals on the floor? The right one, when you depress it with your right foot, puts the van in motion. The other one is your brake. You do not need to floor it, I mean, don’t put the pedals all the way to the floor. You just have to press down slowly. Here is the shift. ‘P’ is for park, like we are now, and ‘R’ means reverse. We won’t worry about ‘N’, which stands for neutral or these three numbers. ‘D’ is for drive. Turn the key away from you. Don’t press either of the pedals. That’s it. Hear the engine turn over? Let go of the key now. Good. So, the dashboard gives you all the information you need for driving. That’s your speedometer, letting you know how fast you are going. You’ve seen speed signs around town.”

“Yes, and I notice few people actually obey them,” Finrod interjected, “including you.”

Glorfindel shrugged. “After a while the signs are more suggestions than absolute rules, but as a learner, you are to obey them religiously. Do not go over the speed limit. The next thing is to check the mirrors. You and I are about the same height, so the mirrors should be set okay for you.” He explained what Finrod should be able to see with the mirrors, warning him about the blind spots. Finrod adjusted the rearview mirror slightly, but the other mirrors he left alone.

“So, ready to give it a whirl?” Glorfindel asked once he had gone over everything. At Finrod’s nod, he said, “Press down on the brake all the way with your right foot…Yes, you’ll always use your right foot for both pedals. Now move the shift from P to D… Very good… we’re going to go straight down the runway … press down on the accelerator… Whoa! Not so fast!”

Glorfindel clutched the dashboard with both hands as the van practically leapt from zero to fifty almost immediately. “Slow down, slow down! Take your foot off the pedal… No! Don’t brake!” But it was too late. Finrod, panicking a bit at the unexpected speed in which he was driving, slammed the brake on and the van came to a screeching halt with Glorfindel swearing. Finrod looked a bit pale and he had to gulp air a couple of times before he got his breathing under control.

“Did I not tell you to press down slowly?” Glorfindel said between gritted teeth, pushing his hair out of his eyes.

“Sorry,” Finrod said abjectly as he put the van into park. “I… I did not realize it would not take as much pressure as I thought it should.”

“Oh, okay… didn’t think about that. My fault. So now you know. You really just need to press gently. The van will start moving. Keep your eye on the speedometer without taking your eyes off the road. When it gets to thirty, just ease back on the pedal a bit without taking your foot off. Eventually, you’ll know how much pressure you need to exert to regulate your speed. Right now, I know it’s difficult to gauge it. Ready to try again?”

Finrod nodded, took a deep breath and moved the shift to drive. “That’s it… nice and easy does it… Okay, now you’re going to ease off the pedal and press down on the brake to slow down but not stop and then turn the wheel to the right — SLOWLY! … Yep… good… speed up again… Now try turning it to the left…Excellent. Okay, we’re coming up to the end of the runway, so you want to turn around and go the other way… good… now pretend there’s a stop sign just where that door is. Come to a full stop… that’s it. What do we do when we come to a stop sign?”

“Look all ways,” Finrod dutifully answered.

Glorfindel nodded. “Let’s just pretend that we’ve come to an intersection with a four-way stop and another vehicle has reached the intersection on our right at the same time as we have. Who goes through first?”

“The person on the right,” Finrod replied, “but what if four of us arrive from all four directions at the same time?”

Glorfindel grinned. “Then you sit there staring at one another, waiting to see who’s brave enough to make the first move. But in actuality, that rarely happens. Sometimes when no one is entirely sure who got to the intersection first, someone might wave at you to go or you might.”

Finrod nodded.

“Okay, so now we’re going to speed up a bit,” Glorfindel said. “There really is nowhere around here where you can actually go fifty or sixty miles an hour, but I want you to get the feel of going that fast, to learn proper control. I’ll also give you directions, like turn right, turn left, that sort of thing. So, if you’re all set…”

They spent a good hour going up and down the runway. Finrod began to relax a bit more, though he complained at one point that he had difficulty keeping his eye on the road and on the speedometer at the same time, and Glorfindel assured him that with practice he would be able to do so without thinking about it. They also practiced going in reverse and Glorfindel taught him how to parallel park and do three-point turns.

By the time they were finished, it was going on lunchtime, so Glorfindel suggested they head back to Wiseman. “I’ll let you drive, but we’ll stop just before we get to town and switch. I don’t think you’re quite ready to drive through Wiseman yet. Today was a good start, but only that.”

“How long will it be before I can take the road test?”

“If you were a teenager, six months, but as an adult, I think it’s shorter. I’m going to have you sign up for driver education along with the others. It’ll just be a few lessons from a certified instructor who will be a better judge of whether you’re ready to take the road test or not than I am.”

Finrod nodded, concentrating on the road back to Nolan. There was little traffic, but there was traffic nonetheless and Finrod felt his hands tightening on the wheel as he saw other vehicles either approaching from the other lane or ahead of him.

“Relax,” Glorfindel said quietly. “Just remember to stay on the right side of the centerline.”

“What if there is no centerline?”

“You still stay on the right, using the shoulder as a guide. You’re doing just fine, gwador. Nice and easy. Trust me, this time next week, you’ll be driving like a pro. Just remember, you need one of us with you, but we’ll give you every opportunity to drive. Okay. Pull over here and we’ll switch.”

Finrod did as he was bid and soon they had exchanged places. Glorfindel gave him a warm smile as he pulled back out onto the road. “So how do you feel, Bookstore Boy?”

Finrod laughed. “As soon as my stomach stops fluttering, I’ll let you know. I’m shaking like a leaf.”

“Yeah, I know. Don’t worry though. It’ll pass.”

They fell silent as Glorfindel made his way along a variety of streets until he reached Kodiak and then when he got to Sycamore, he pulled over, putting the car into park and giving Finrod a conspiratorial grin. “Want to take her in?”

For a second or two, Finrod wasn’t quite sure what his gwador meant and then nodded. “Thank you. I would like that.”

They exchanged places once again. Glorfindel pulled out his phone and after speed-dialing a number, spoke in it. “We’re a couple of blocks away,” was all he said before turning the phone off. Finrod put on the turn signal and carefully looked to see if there was any traffic before pulling out and going the two blocks to the entrance to Edhellond where they saw several people standing outside watching. Glorfindel directed him to park before the front door and Finrod nervously complied, his lips tight as he concentrated on not running anyone over.

As soon as he brought the car to a halt and turned off the engine, the onlookers all applauded. Finrod exchanged grins with Glorfindel who clapped him on the shoulder before they exited the van. Everyone surrounded Finrod, asking how it went. He proudly pulled out his learner’s permit from his wallet and everyone admired it. Then they trooped inside with Daeron stating that lunch was available if they wanted any.

Both Finrod and Glorfindel nodded and everyone headed down the hall to the kitchen but Glorfindel stopped dead at the doorway, his eyes widening.

“What the hell?” he exclaimed and all the others started laughing at his nonplused expression.

“What is it?” Finrod asked from behind.

Glorfindel stepped further into the room so Finrod could see.

“Good lord!” was the ellon’s reaction as he stared at the transformed room.

Sitting on almost every available counter space and on the table of the breakfast nook were stuffed rabbits, all of them with grayish fur, in all different sizes from hand-high to thigh-high, most of them decorated with bows, pink and yellow predominating. One of the larger ones even sported a small Easter basket though it was empty.

“What’s this?” Glorfindel demanded.

Elrohir, who happened to be there, snickered. “Gray hares, of course. Didn’t Ron say you’d get them teaching Finrod how to drive? Well, there you go.” He gestured to the stuffed toys and everyone started laughing again. It took a moment for Finrod to catch on and then he was giving Glorfindel a merry look, reaching out to take one of Glorfindel’s golden locks and pretending to examine it. Glorfindel laughingly pushed him away.

“Cute,” he said when everyone calmed down.

“So, gwador, what will you do with all these… um… gray hares?” Finrod asked.

Glorfindel shrugged and then as an idea came to him, he chuckled. “I think I’ll keep one as a memento but I’ll give the rest to Amroth and Della.” He paused, giving them all a wicked grin. “After all, they’re breeding like rabbits.”

The laughter at that was long and loud and there were several rather crude but pointed jokes passed between them. Someone suggested perhaps sneaking over to Edhellond-two in the middle of the night and planting the toys on the front lawn with a note about breeding like rabbits and everyone enthusiastically agreed to the plan, offering up suggestions as they cleared a space at the table so Finrod and Glorfindel could sit while Daeron ladled some bean soup into bowls and put a plate of sandwich meats and cheeses on the table along with some bread for making sandwiches.

****

An hour after dawn, the front door of a house on Evergreen Drive opened, the owner wishing to retrieve the morning paper.

“What the hell!” Amroth exclaimed in surprise at the sight of all the stuffed rabbits littering the lawn. The largest one stood on the stoop facing the door, a piece of paper rolled up and tied with a blue ribbon and shoved in the little Easter basket it carried. Amroth pulled it out, unrolled it, reading its contents. “Why those devious little… Della! Come see this! You’re not going to believe what Loren’s pulled now.”

Curious as to what Amroth was going on about, Vorondur and Ercassë joined Nimrodel as she went to the front door. When Vorondur fell to the floor laughing, having immediately gotten the joke even before Amroth showed them the slip of paper, the other three just stood there staring at him in disbelief.

It took some time before Vorondur could get himself under control.

****

Notes:

1. You can learn more about the Yakut at www(dot)lrgaf(dot)org/articles/yakut_horse.htm

2. My thanks to Ellie for giving me the idea for the ‘gray hares’ joke.