Chapter 30.  Breaking Point

 “Are you sure there will be enough room for all your people?” Aragorn asked his two friends with some concern as they discussed their plans over breakfast the following day. It was actually more of an early lunch for Aragorn and Gimli, who had both slept well after a rowdy evening at the tavern. Legolas, as was his habit, had been awake since dawn.

Gimli and he had spent the night in guest chambers in the King’s house, but Tathar and the rest of the revellers had set up camps outside the gates. Despite assurances that Elf and Dwarf alike were well accustomed to sleeping under the stars, and in fact preferred it to the strangeness of a human city, the King had felt rather remiss in not providing better accommodation. His suggestion that the two groups of restorers should use the large house in Minas Tirith that had been home to the Fellowship during their stay after the Ring War as the headquarters from which to organise the repair work, was met with delight by Legolas and Gimli. The house held many fond memories for them both, memories of pleasant evenings by the fire, where they would sing, laugh at the merry banter between the Hobbits or tell each other tales both true and tall.

“There will be more than enough room for those staying behind when we leave tomorrow.” Legolas assured him

“Why are you leaving so soon?” Aragorn stared at his friend in disbelief as the Elf made the casual announcement.

“I can not speak for Gimli, but now that we have paid our respects to you, my folk and I are eager to travel to Ithilien and find a suitable location for our settlement,” replied Legolas as he exchanged glances with the Dwarf who nodded his silent accord.

 “Aye, we are of like mind, Master Elf. My kin and I are also eager to travel on to Aglarond,” confirmed Gimli.

“What of the restoration work you promised?”  Aragorn protested with a frown of disappointment and a hint of anger.

“Several of my friends will remain behind to begin the work and Tathar is arranging the first work group even as we speak. Both Gimli and I will be frequent visitors to ensure that all is going as planned.” Legolas’s quietly spoken words of reassurance mollified the King’s anger and it was replaced with curiosity as Gimli asked the question he had not yet thought to ask.

“Tell me Legolas, do you favour any particular part of the forest in which to make your new home?”

“My friends prefer somewhere with close access to the Anduin, and being unfamiliar with these woods, I was hoping to ask Faramir for his assistance in selecting a suitable site. He knows Ithilien’s forest better than most. Is the Steward expected in your court today, Aragorn?”

“Indeed he is, for he is escorting Arwen back from a visit with Éowyn.” A soft smile of anticipation played on his lips as he spoke his beloved‘s name. Arwen had been gone for over a month and he missed her terribly.

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To everyone’s surprise, Faramir had already given much consideration to locations that might appeal to the Elves, so delighted was he to have them in Ithilien, and he eagerly escorted Legolas, Tathar  and the others who were to begin the task of building the telain to the site he favoured. There were many sturdy tall trees in the heavily wooded area that was but a short distance from a wide stream that flowed into the mighty Anduin. Legolas was delighted that the site was exactly as he had envisioned it should be and reluctantly returned to Minas Tirith to oversee the work there, leaving Tathar in charge of the settlement. The Rangers of Ithilien offered their assistance in building the new colony and as the friendship between the men and Elves grew, so did the village in the trees. When Legolas returned several weeks later for a brief visit to check on the progress being made he was astonished to find the telain almost completed.

“Welcome to your new home,” said the Captain of the Rangers in slightly shaky Sindarin as Legolas strode gracefully into the small clearing that housed the communal kitchen and dining hall.

“You have learned our language,” he said with surprise as he suddenly realised that many of the Rangers were now conversing freely in Sindarin.

“Ai, we initially found conveying ideas to be a little difficult, and so offered to teach them a few words in payment for their wondrous aid,” explained Tathar with a bow to the Captain.

“It has been our pleasure. We are more than grateful to see the beauty of the forest begin to flourish with life once more .There is such a warm feeling in the air,  it seems as if the trees are… happy,” he said hesitantly as he looked up into the rich green canopy above.

“They are, their spirits sing with joy,” Legolas confirmed softly and with a hint of sadness that only Tathar could detect. He studied his friend closely, but made no comment at the restlessness he saw in the depths of his eyes. Neither Elf noticed when the Captain of the rangers answered a summons from one of his men, leaving them on their own.

Eager to prevent his friend from slipping into a melancholy mood, Tathar insisted on showing Legolas what had already been achieved, beginning with the talan they were to share. It was high in one of the trees near the edge of the village, and thus had a view that encompassed both the forest and the silvery Anduin that flowed majestically in the distance.

“This is a breathtaking view,” commented Legolas when he had had his fill of the sight. “I suppose this is your room?” he enquired, remembering the elder Elf’s playful threat to take the one with the best view. Tathar laughed at the disappointed look on his friend’s face.

“Nay, this is far too large for one room, but we are standing in your half.  I have yet to build the dividing wall, but when I do, we will both have the same view from our common balcony,” he explained. Legolas liked that idea very much and offered Tathar a brilliant smile that was returned in kind. “Come, there is something else you need to see,” he said mysteriously as he grabbed Legolas’s hand as he had often done when they were children excited about some adventure, forcing him to follow. They walked through the densely growing trees, finally stopping at a clearing that appeared unexpectedly in the midst of the forest. It was large, and almost circular in shape, but the trees were spread so far apart that the stars would be able to watch the merrymaking with an unobstructed view.

“I found this yesterday, and think it is a perfect place for our feasts,” he said. “Shall we try it out tonight?” Legolas agreed it was immensely suitable but merely cast a sceptical glance at his friend.

“Tathar, how can we have a feast? Our supplies are only basic until we can establish crops or trade with the city for our needs.”

“True, but do not forget that our beloved King ensured we had sufficient coin to pay for what we will need until that time. I travelled to Osgiliath yesterday and made a few purchases, and the rangers who accompanied me have secured one or two barrels of a wine that is really quite good. It is high time we celebrated our arrival, and properly thanked our new friends,” he said, daring Legolas to object. The younger Elf smiled at his friend’s determination and was wise enough not to waste his breath.

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Legolas had to admit that the feast Tathar had prepared from the simple that he had acquired, with some fierce bargaining, according to those he had travelled with, from the markets at Osgiliath was one Tariel would have found little reason to fault. One of the rangers had acted as assistant cook, and there were dishes to please both Elf and Man, and the wine was every bit as excellent as Tathar had claimed. A mixture of musicians from the two Races provided music for the singing and the few elf maidens in their number were soon danced off their feet.

Yet in the midst of all the gaiety and frivolity, there was one whose smile did not reach his eyes. Tathar had been surreptitiously watching Legolas all night, and suspected that his enjoyment of the evening was mostly a façade. He was certain of it when the younger Elf was startled when he placed an affectionate hand his shoulder.

“What disturbs you thoughts, mellon nin?’ he asked gently, as he directed Legolas to a more private spot where they could talk without interruption. “Is the work in the city the cause of your concern?” Eyes filled with sorrow met his for a brief moment, and then Legolas shook his head.

“Nay, other than a few disagreements about the need for sturdy stone structures where grasses and flowers now grow, all is well.” Tathar laughed as he imagined the friendly rivalry that surely plagued the dwellers in the city. Even before he had left there had been a shocked silence from the Dwarves as he refused their help to draw up plans, saying the Elves would plant new life wherever the fancy took them, and that they needed no parchment to guide their designs.

“Then tell me why your heart is in turmoil.” It was a tender demand designed to force Legolas speak of his sadness as Tathar knew he needed to do.

“I do not think I can keep my promise to Aragorn.”

“To restore the city?” asked a confused Tathar.

“Nay. To stay in Middle-earth until he is King no more.” Legolas’s reply was choked by the tears he was desperately trying not to shed.

“The sea calls to you.” It was a simple statement with a depth of meaning that Legolas knew Tathar did not really understand.

“Ai, I want so desperately to go home, to sail the Straight Road In my dreams, Nana stands on a beautiful white shore and calls to me with open arms, and I run to her, all thoughts of those I leave behind nothing but a distant memory.”

“Then why fight it, do as your heart desires,” suggested Tathar.

“That is the problem, I can not. I have never broken an oath, and it would grieve me sorely to do so, especially when it is an oath to Aragorn. But more than that, my love for my friends will not allow me to cause them pain. Yet even now, part of my heart tells me I am deceiving myself, it scorns my friend’s love for me, laughs at my foolish attachment to those who have other loves and mortal lives. Aragorn does not need me, he has Arwen and his Kingdom, Gimli has his kinfolk Aglarond. Sometimes I do not know what to believe in anymore. I feel that if I do not heed the call of the sea I will fade, just as I will if I leave my friends.  Tell me what I should choose, Tathar?” he begged, the anguish in his voice tearing into Tathar’s own heart as he took his now sobbing friend into his arms.

“As much as it hurts me to say this, mellon nin, I have no answer for you. I can not speak for your heart, but I can speak for mine. You are like a brother to me, and  whatever path you choose, you will always have my love,” he said his voice filled with frustration at his inability to ease Legolas’s pain.  “Let me be your strength, for you do not have my permission to fade.” To his relief, Legolas managed a weak smile at such an outrageous command.

“I love you too, my brother,” whispered Legolas as he placed a chaste kiss on Tathar’s cheek. The feast now long forgotten, they sat in silence until they both eventually drifted into sleep, still tightly enfolded in a comforting embrace.

When they awoke early the next morning, Tathar was pleased to see Legolas was back in good spirits.

“I wonder what our ranger friends will think, for surely they noticed our sleeping arrangement,” Legolas mused, sparing his friend a wicked grin as he slowly disentangled himself from the arms that held him close.

“I am certain there will be a few raised eyebrows, but let them assume what they will, I care not,” he replied dismissively. “I am more interested in how you feel.”

“Much better, and although my inner conflict remains unresolved and the sea calls me as strongly as ever, I am certain my control has returned.” Tathar was sceptical for Legolas sounded anything but reassuring; however he trusted his friend, and decided to accept his word, at least for now.