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| The Wars of the Valar by Fiondil | 559 Review(s) |
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| Aglarendis | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 7/31/2007 |
| Greetings Fiondil! Ah, so quickly read, and already I suffer for lack of knowing what is going to happen next! It's comforting to see Namo as young, uncertain, hesitant to step into the discussions of those older than he is. It helps to know that those we might consider to be wise were not always so. He shows such confidence, such imperturbability in other stories, but I like seeing him as his confidence is tested and gained. My respect and love for Manwe only increases as I read this. I especially like the way he dealt with the crisis while still being aware of Namo's needs and fears. That is the sign of a good leader! So Varda has a temper, does she? A part of me wanted to think that she never would have said what she did, but she, too, is still relatively young as compared to how she would be now. I'm glad you showed Manwe comforting, and perhaps confronting her also. I hope we see the apology she gives to Namo. I particularly liked seeing Namo with his own mayar. I hope he gains more as his role is made clear. It was good to see that he has those whom he leads, those who love and serve him without question. I would like to encourage you to put the meanings of names such as Tindomerel at the ends of your chapters. You always make such good names, and I would like very much to know what they mean. I know you said you would not be regularly updating this story, but I do hope you realize that I will continue to harrass you until more chapters come forth. This story has me firmly in its grasp! Author Reply: Hi Aglarendis. Thanks for your review. I may put in a character list at the end with the meaning of names. Many of the OC Máyar here can be found in my story 'Elf Interrupted', although I am adding some more here that don't show up in the other story. While some of my characters' names are created, many are sinply lifted from Tolkien's Legendarium as names of characters he later discarded. While the Ayanumuz are still relatively young at this point compared to when we meet them in the 'Silmarillion', we see glimpses of what they eventually will become. Manwë is definitely the leader of the group. Varda may have a temper, but she knows her business. Even Námo, young and uncertain as he is, can rise to the occasion when called for as we see how he handles his Máyar during the Song, keeping them in line yet at the same time comforting them, even apologizing to them for what he had to do. I'm sure that some of the Máyar who have attached themselves to the other Ayanumuz will drift into Námo's camp eventually, and of course, when he and Vairë are joined, her Máyar will then become his as well. | |
| Agape4Gondor | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 7/31/2007 |
| It is a real shame that - at the very beginning of all things - they are already having to be concerned (besides with Melkor) that others might not be loyal to Eru. *giggles* - 'He nodded. "Very musical, but not as... as musical as you... I mean when you sing," he said wondering if he sounded as idiotic as he felt.' Poor Namo - he's stuck making pronouncements that he doesn't even comprehend and then has to 'endure' the 'looks' of those about him! 'Námo nodded. "The tenth dimensional field will prove important for us in the future."' Author Reply: Yes, it is a shame that they must deal with the fact that others of their kind will turn away from Eru to follow Melkor, but of course, that's what happened even though some, like Sauron, did not declare themselves until much later, acting, as it were, as moles, feeding information to Melkor about the doings of the Valar. Námo is still quite young (as is Vairë) and so their courtship is bound to be delightfully adolescent in scope. Vairë already knows she wants Námo for her spouse, but Námo is still clueless, as the male of the species usually is about such things. *grin* I'm sure that after awhile the others will come to accept Námo's gift of prescience and take it in stride, knowing that it's for their benefit as well. | |
| Agape4Gondor | Reviewed Chapter: 2 on 7/31/2007 |
| I liked the Song continued. It seems only logical that the work of the Valar in this particular instance would never really stop, would it? And Namo's tricking Melkor - you go!!! Manwe to Namo - 'you forget nothing' - definitely a talent he will need as he leads folk through Mandos! Eru and Namo - beautiful moment - I'm glad you shared it with us! Author Reply: In the "Silmarillion" it is said that Námo forgets nothing, which is a handy gift to have sometimes and that makes him the logical choice for remembering the equation to change the variable. It seemed logical that the Valar would continue to Sing creation into being as they went about the business of building Eä. There would be no reason why they wouldn't since it was the Ainulindalë that brought it into existence in the first place. I hope to share other moments of Eru and Námo talking in subsequent chapters, thus, giving us a glimpse of the Timeless Halls as well. | |
| Agape4Gondor | Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 7/31/2007 |
| SORRY - my review under the Prologue chapter should have been for Chapter ONE... I guess I got too excited at the prospect of another tale! Author Reply: That's okay. I figured you weren't paying attention to which chapter you were reviewing. *grin* | |
| Agape4Gondor | Reviewed Chapter: Prologue on 7/31/2007 |
| Your first paragraph really sets the stage for a great chapter. I loved the wording, esp. 'he had timed it just right.' I immediately wondered what on - well there is no Middle-earth yet, is there! I just wondered what the Vala was going to do! Great line here - 'It was glorious and Námo exalted in the fiery death of one of Varda’s creations even as he mourned the destruction that would follow.' This definitely sounds like a fun new sport! 'He rode the wave, allowing himself to be swept across space.' But to have it end with Melkor *shivers* He is an incredibly evil thing! Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww - '"Did you enjoy your ride, Little One?" Melkor asked condescendingly.' And then - YIKES - 'A dark thrill coursed through him and he shivered involuntarily.' Forgive me - it might not be your intent - but this whispering of Melkor's and Namo's fighting it with such difficulty reminded me of Boromir and the whispers of the Ring. I'm glad Namo had someone near who could help him!!! This is fun to see - the Valar having a good time - 'Ulmo and Aulë were idly jumping off the rings... riding the air currents. Oromë and Nessa were racing each other around the rings while Irmo, Estë and Vairë were tossing ice shards at one another...' I love the hint of Namo's future greatness in this chapter and the 'gift' he has already received. Very nice chapter indeed! Author Reply: Thanks, Agape. I'm glad you liked this chapter. The image of Námo standing on the moon waiting for the supernova is the first image that came to me when I was thinking of writing this story and so, that is the starting point from which all else flows. Most of this story I think will describe the interaction between Melkor and Námo. In many ways they are alike but there is enough of a difference in character that Námo stays true to Eru. Yet... one shudders to think what he might have become had he joined with Melkor. The Valar here are still young, unweighed by the cares which assail them by the time we meet them in the Silmarillion, so there is still a sense of play about them (though that never fades since play is an integral aspect of all sentient beings, however old. We see that even in "Elf Interrupted" with Námo and Irmo making bets.) | |
| Nieriel Raina | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 7/31/2007 |
| What another wonderful chapter! I love how you weave physics throughout this ans have set the Valar as Scientists. It is done so well! *applause* And I am truly loving Námo and seeing him younger and not very self assured. I am looking forward to seeing more of his courtship with Vairë too. They are quite sweet together. Manwë and Varda... it was interesting to see them a bit at odds. Nicely done! But I think what I liked most about this chapter was Námo's care for his Mayar. You are painting such a great tale, and I am loving every minute! *holds out plate* More, please? NiRi Author Reply: Thanks NiRi. This was a hard chapter to write, mainly because of the physics and how the Ayanumuz would respond to the latest threat from Melkor. Námo is fun to write at any stage of his existence and I am enjoying seeing him and Vairë discover one another. And as with any married couple, there are bound to be times of discord and Varda is reacting somewhat emotionally to the situation, rather than attempting to find a solution to the problem. Námo may not have as many Máyar in his service, but the few that he has are fiercely devoted to him and he to them. There is much love between them and I think that is what attracts Vairë to him, that he has such love for others in spite of his (present) insecurities. Don't worry... there will be plenty more to come, just be patient. *grin* | |
| Stefania | Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 7/26/2007 |
| Hi Fiondil - This is my first venture into one of your stories and I can't wait to see what you do with it. I always felt myself some sort of weird geek for loving Tolkien's creation myth in the Silmarillion--the King James Bible meets the Greek pantheon! Thank you so much for so ably doing the job of fanfic--giving us more of something we already love. I'm particularly tickled by the innocent, SciFi spin of this first chapter. - Steff Author Reply: Hi Steff, I'm glad you found one of my stories and found it to your liking. Hopefully you will continue to do so. I hope in the meantime you dip into some of my other stories, especially those that are complete. I look forward to seeing more comments from you in the future. Thank you for reviewing. | |
| Radbooks | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 7/25/2007 |
| Sorry it's taken me several days to review this but I had to gather my thoughts - not that I'll be any clearer today than I would have been the first time I read this chapter a couple of days ago. Like one of your other reviewers I had to read it several times and the only words I can come up with are... brilliant and revolting. Brilliant because it was as wonderful written as your other chapters and stories. I could just see Namo and Orome searching for Melkor across the universe, I loved the colors of the Valar and how Namo's violet was soothing which so fit his future role as comforter. I was as startled as Namo and Orome were when Melkor appeared above them, I thought they were going to confront him and I was wishing they'd call for back-up. I absolutely loved Manwe's embrace and love that he gave to a very frightened and embarrassed Namo... that whole scene was great. You know what the revolting part was, don't you? :) It was also brilliant or it wouldn't be revolting! When Melkor was seducing Namo it made my skin crawl. I felt so sorry for Namo and was so glad when Orome rescued him from Melkor. I do hope that Namo remembers that he is NOT the only one that has been tempted otherwise he'll really start doubting himself. Very well done! Author Reply: I told my beta-reader that even as I was writing that seduction scene I felt as if something slimy were slithering across my soul, leaving me feeling slightly soiled. But that's what evil does (and why I upped the rating because I have a feeling this won't be the last such scene with Melkor). Luckily, Oromë kept his head and was able to effect a rescue and call for help. Whether Námo remembers that he's NOT the only one so tempted by Melkor remains to be seen. His self-confidence has been shattered and it will take some time for him to regain it. In spite of the revolting part, I'm glad you found the chapter brilliant otherwise. Thanks for reviewing. | |
| Larner | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 7/23/2007 |
| A horrible confrontation, and I, too, am glad Orome was there to draw Namo away before Melkor could take from the young Vala what he wished of him. Now, where indeed are the guards? Author Reply: Where indeed? We will discover that and what trouble Manwë must see to in the next chapter. Stay tuned. | |
| Edlyn | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 7/23/2007 |
| Whew! That was a ride and a half, meldonya! I've read the chapter three times since you posted it and it STILL grabs me and won't let go! All right, here are my thoughts and comments starting with the beginning of the chapter: Brrr! I'd shiver, too, to find that Melkor was waiting for me! I definitely liked meeting Oromë and finding out more about him. I liked his explaining that he didn't disapprove of Námo riding the plasma wave but that he really would prefer not to have to hear Varda going off about it. Oromë's comment about Námo's strange tastes in entertainment and Aulë's heavy-metal collecting reminded me of hearing one of my older relatives commenting on a cousin of mine whose favourite leisure activity is skydiving and base-jumping and my youngest sister who for many years collected beer cans. So Námo is an adrenaline junkie and Aulë is a collecting geek "Vardium" LOL! I find it interesting that Námo's favourites all have to do with things that involve high degrees of energy; supernova plasma waves, very radioactive elements and the like. There's a lot of power in both of them and I wonder if part of what makes Námo so vulnerable to Melkor is his attraction towards things of high energy and therefore great power. The thrill of balancing on the very edge of life, death, disaster or whatever else is addictive, so it seems to me that Melkor is offering the ultimate thrill to Námo, feeding his addiction, so to speak. *"Or perhaps he set off this supernova for the explicit reason of luring you here for your little... chat."* Oh, that was an absolutely terrifying sentence. And it not only made Námo angry; it certainly had to have made him feel guilty, especially as there had been life developing on one of the destroyed planets. Which goes to show just how thoroughly nasty Melkor is. He could have chosen a system that had no burgeoning life on it to destroy if all he wanted to do was to get Námo in a particular place at a particular time. But he had to have selected this one on purpose, perhaps knowing that the guilt that Námo would feel could be used to drag him into such despair that he'd stop fighting the temptation and join with Melkor. Again, brrrr! If I needed any further proof that Námo is still a youngling, it was his surprise when Oromë told him that Melkor had tempted all of them and that more than once. Younglings are self-centered by nature and part of growing up is the realisation that others experience similar, if not the same, temptations and troubles as they do. I'm certain that each of the Ayanumuz have flaws that Melkor is using when he tempts them. Hmmm, it would be interesting to try to figure out just what Melkor was tempting each of them with... No, I shouldn't go there, I have enough plot bunnies running around bitng my ankles without letting more into the house. Oh, my! What IS Melkor doing to the stars? I'm sure we'll find out, eventually. I was surprised to find it was the elder of our two hunters who needed to be reined in from disobeying Manwë's orders, typically one would think it would be the younger who would be more likely to do that. *"When you have finished discussing how you will stop me, why don’t you come out from behind that star and join me?"* I about had a heart attack when Melkor said that, thank you very much! If the Ayanumuz can have heart attacks I'm sure Námo and Oromë would have just about had one, too. Melkor's attempt to take Námo and the aftermath was so emotionally overwhelming (I was literally shaking the first time I read it) that it has taken three readings to be able to get my thoughts in any sort of order regarding it. Frankly, the first thing that came to mind was that what Melkor was doing was tantamount to rape. And Námo's reactions were right in line with those of a victim of rape; shock, shame, anger, hate, withdrawal, assumption of blame, guilt, grief, residual fear... Thank Eru that Oromë was there! I shudder to think of what would have happened if Námo couldn't have gotten away from Melkor. No, I'm not going there, either. The healing of Námo's fëa was lovely and perfectly balanced the terror of the preceding paragraphs. I was crying when I read **You are my best beloved, with whom I am well pleased.* Love is SO very tangible in those words. And then you gave us a little humor to lighten things up a bit though the situation they are in is serious. Námo's interaction with Vairë was sweet and I have to admit her *"Do I look like moondust to you?"* was absolutely priceless. I'll be emailing you privately with any further thoughts because I don't want this review to be longer than the chapter Hugs, Edlyn Author Reply: Thank you for your comments, Edlyn. That you had to read this chapter three times in order to do write any comments stuns me, though I am grateful. I will not overburden the system by commenting on every part of your comments except to say that my beta-reader described what was happening to Námo with the same words you did: rape. Spiritual rape, yes, but rape nonetheless. Because of the intensity of this one scene and the possiblity of future scenes of a similar nature where Melkor is concerned I decided to up the rating of this story to PG-13, just to be on the safe side. Luckily Oromë was smart enough to call for help rather than try to handle Námo himself, and Vairë insisting on coming along with Manwë shows that her concern for him is more than just what one would have for a fellow Ayanuz. | |