“It’s All In The Details”

“Why are you awake?” Pippin groaned turning over and hiding underneath the covers.

“It’s morning. That’s what folks do when it becomes morning,” Merry said brightly. “They wake up and greet the new day.”

“Greet it for me, will you?” Pippin muttered from beneath the blankets.

“I’ve a better idea,” Merry said sitting down on the edge of the bed next to the lumpy pile of blankets. “Why don’t you crawl out of there and greet the morning yourself?”

Pippin growled something that probably wasn’t repeatable in polite company but made no effort to get up.

“I don’t think that would be very pleasant,” Merry said. “Besides, if I were to attempt that I might injure myself and then you’d have to get up and go get a healer.” He reached over and poked the largest portion of the blanket pile sharply.

“Ouch!”

“Come on, come out of there,” Merry said poking at the lump in the bed again. This time Merry poked slightly harder.

“Go away,” Pippin moaned. “Leave me here and go greet the morning in whatever way that seems proper to you. I won’t keep you.”

“You’re wasting a perfectly good morning,” Merry sighed.

“And you are disturbing a perfectly good sleep,” Pippin grumbled pulling himself into a ball and tightening his grip on the blankets.

“Trouble?” Frodo asked as he leaned against the door frame and looked into the room.

“One of us is less than enthusiastic about getting up,” Merry replied reaching over and swatting what he suspected was Pippin’s backside.

“Go away, Meriadoc,” Pippin growled. “Frodo, make him go away.” This last was said in a pleading tone designed to gain sympathy.

Frodo chuckled softly. “You know, I seem to recall you being an early riser, Pippin. In fact I am recalling some of your other visits to Bag End and it seems to me that you were usually the first one awake.” Frodo winked at Merry. “I’m not wrong about that am I?”

“No, I recall the same thing, Cousin,” Merry said. “In fact when Pippin used to visit Buckland he was always awake before I was.”

“Was he?” Frodo asked sounding as if this were news he’d never heard before.

“Oh, yes,” Merry said warming to the subject. “I can remember being sound asleep in my warm, comfortable bed dreaming pleasant dreams without a thought of rising and there would be our little cousin, Pippin up and ready for the day.” Merry patted the lump on the bed. “He’d come into my room wide awake and leap onto my bed and see to it that I was wide awake too.”

“That’s exactly how it used to be here as well,” Frodo said walking over and standing at the foot of the bed. “I would be sleeping so soundly that Peregrin would have to bounce on the bed in order to wake me.”

“And I suspect that he did bounce on the bed,” Merry said.

“He did so most enthusiastically,” Frodo nodded. “Why sometimes he very nearly bounced me out of the bed in his effort to wake me.”

Pippin groaned and shifted slightly. “Go away, please?”

“There was absolutely nothing that Pippin wouldn’t do to see to it that I was awake and that I didn’t miss a second of the morning,” Frodo went on as if Pippin had not spoken. “I remember how determined he was.”

“Determination is important,” Merry said tugging at Pippin’s blankets lightly. “You have to be determined if you expect to get anywhere at all in life.”

“I can remember wanting nothing more than to sleep for just a few more minutes,” Frodo sighed. “I believe I even requested that I be allowed to do so on more than one occasion but Pippin was so very persistent.”

“He can be, can’t he?” Merry said. “I can recall any number of quiet, early mornings when I might have wasted my time sleeping and instead Pippin saw to it that I was up and dressed and engaged in some sort of activity before I hardly had a chance to gather my wits.” Merry bounced a bit as he spoke.

“One time,” Frodo said raising the rather large bucket that he had been holding throughout the conversation. “I was being more than a bit reluctant about greeting the day. It was just a bit before dawn actually and so naturally I was fighting to remain asleep.”

“You do like to sleep until it becomes light, don’t you?” Merry said grinning broadly.

“It’s a weakness,” Frodo said.

Pippin muttered something about evil older cousins and made another impossible suggestion having to do with placing a large object into a certain orifice and kicked a foot at Merry who responded by bouncing a bit harder on the bed.

“Sometimes someone else has to see to it that you don’t fall victim to your own weaknesses,” Merry said.

“That is exactly what Pippin did for me, Merry,” Frodo said. He shifted the bucket slightly and moved up to stand beside of the bed.

“How did he do that?” Merry inquired looking wide eyed with interest.

“Why he took that extra step,” Frodo said. “He didn’t let a simple thing like the fact that I was completely exhausted stop him from seeing to it that I enjoyed the early morning hours. Why he thought quickly and he reached over onto my nightstand and he picked up the glass of water that I always keep there.”

“Why do you keep water next to your bed?” Merry asked poking at Pippin again.

“In case I get thirsty in the middle of the night,” Frodo said. “I don’t have to get up and go into the kitchen to get a drink. I just reach over, get my water and have a drink. Then I can roll over and go back to sleep again.”

“No feet on the cold floor in winter,” Merry said. “That’s very clever of you, Cousin.”

“Brilliant,” Pippin muttered. “Go be clever somewhere else, will you?”

“Come on, Pip,” Merry objected, poking Pippin a bit harder. “Surely you see the advantage of keeping water near the bed. Why for example, this morning it’s cold and no one has taken up the task of lighting the fires yet. Right now if you were thirsty-“

“I’m not!”

“But if you were, you’d have to go to the kitchen for water,” Merry said.

“No he wouldn’t, Merry,” Frodo said.

“He wouldn’t?”

“No, it just so happens that I try to be prepared for every eventuality when I have guests,” Frodo said.

“You are known throughout the Shire as the perfect host,” Merry said.

“Well, that is because of the little things,” Frodo said. “Details, Merry. It’s all about the small details. A good host knows that details are important.”

“A good host lets his guests sleep,” Pippin mumbled reaching one hand out from beneath the covers and making a grab for his pillow, which Merry snatched and tossed onto the floor by the bed.

“Now, Peregrin,” Frodo said a bit sternly. “What kind of a host would I be if I broke my word to you?”

“Huh?” Pippin whined.

“I used to promise you every single morning when you woke me that if you were ever to be unable to get out of bed in the morning I would be there to assist you just as you had assisted me all of those, cold, dark, mornings,” Frodo said taking one foot and shaking the bed with it while balancing the bucket.

“I don’t recall,” Pippin grumbled sleepily.

“Let me refresh your memory. It is likely just addled by sleep,” Merry offered. “I used to hear Frodo promising you that very thing from several rooms away and I recall promising you that also. Frodo would say something like, ‘One of these days, Peregrin Took, you are going to realize that the day does not have to begin before the sun rises. One of these days you are going to learn that sleeping can be enjoyable.’” Merry stood now and begin to speak in a much louder voice. “One of these days you will come to know that a few extra hours spent sleeping in makes the day all that much brighter. It is on that very day that I will come into your room and see to it that you don’t get to sleep any longer.”

“But you never seemed to listen,” Frodo sighed. “Finally you actually resorted to picking up my glass of water and dumping it on my head!”

“He didn’t!” Merry said looking astounded.

“Oh, but he did,” Frodo said.

“I was twelve,” Pippin moaned.

“You were fourteen and I had a dreadful hangover at the time,” Frodo said.

“Get over it and move on,” Pippin growled reaching his hand up to try and locate his pillow. Frodo and Merry exchanged glances as Pippin’s hand patted the bed searching for the missing pillow.

“It was winter and that water had ice in it from sitting on the night table all evening long,” Frodo said.

“That must have been dreadfully cold,” Merry said.

“It was,” Frodo replied. “It was a large glass too and so I was quite soaked.”

“Was it as large as that bucket that you have there, Cousin?” Merry asked.

“Well, no. It wasn’t that large, Merry but I do tend to do things in a very big way. It’s the details that are important,” Frodo said.

“Bucket?” Pippin murmured from beneath the blanket.

“I suppose that there is water in that bucket,” Merry said.

“There is.”

“Water in a,” Pippin shifted slightly and pulled his hand back underneath the blankets. “What bucket?”

“But I guess that it isn’t all that cold, is it?” Merry asked.

“You’d be mistaken on that, Meriadoc,” Frodo said. “It’s the little details that separate a good host from a great host and I am a great host.”

“Great annoyance,” Pippin muttered.

“You see, I was thinking ahead,” Frodo went on. “I saw a need for icy water and so I filled this very bucket that you see here in my hands-“

“You do not have a bucket,” Pippin growled.

“Want to place a small wager on that?” Merry asked.

“This bucket, that you see here in my hands,” Frodo repeated as if ignoring both of them. “I took it and filled it with water and then I had the foresight to set it out on the stoop all night so that it might be nice and cold this morning. You don’t think I would over look a detail like that, do you? I mean the icy temperature of the water was exactly the thing that made it impossible for me to remain in my nice, warm bed. I had to get up and change and build a fire and make tea and all sorts of things.”

“I should imagine so,” Merry said. “But an entire bucket?”

“There is no bucket,” Pippin muttered.

“Well, I suppose that would make an even larger mess,” Frodo said. “But I do like to repay my guests in kind, Merry. I enjoy being a good host and providing more of everything is one of the details-“

“I am so sick of details,” Pippin groaned.

“He’s right, Cousin,” Merry said. “Time is wasting. You should get on with it. There will be plenty of time to reflect on the details later.”

“If you’re certain,” Frodo shrugged.

“Reflect later,” Pippin growled.

“You heard him,” Merry grinned backing up.

“Very well,” Frodo said and with those two words he proceeded to raise the bucket up over the lump in the blankets and dump the freezing cold water out.

There was a howl from beneath the blankets that was most likely heard in the far corners of the Shire and maybe even as far away as Bree. This was followed by a desperate effort by the soaking wet occupant of the bed to untangle himself from the now freezing cold bedding. Blankets shifted and twisted and profanity was hurled about the room between the chattering teeth of the formerly motionless lump on the bed as Merry and Frodo stood back and watched with a vast amount of amusement. Finally, after what must have seemed like a very long time, the head of Peregrin Took emerged from the covers and he glared at both older cousins.

“Good morning, Pippin,” Frodo said smiling and patting the bucket with one hand. “Sleep well?”

Pippin proceeded to instruct Frodo on an interesting use for the bucket while climbing out of the bed in his wet night shirt.

“There’s a interesting idea,” Merry said. “Painful, but probably interesting.”

“I believe it is impossible though,” Frodo said.

“Folks would pay to see it done,” Merry said.

Pippin shivered. “Don’t just stand there! Build a f-f-fire!”

Frodo yawned. “You can if you’d like, Pippin. I think it’s warm enough in here. What about you Merry?”

“I’m fine,” Merry smiled. “Don’t trouble yourself on my account.”

“Evil, s-sick, t-twisted, nutters,” Pippin shouted as he looked about the room for something dry to put on. He stomped one foot in the puddle that had formed around his bed and glared at them. “I-I was t-t-twelve!”

“Fourteen,” Frodo smiled.

“Details, details,” Merry said. “Let’s go some place dry, Frodo.”

“I h-hope you b-b-both are h-happy now!” Pippin shouted after them. This was followed by more profanity.

“So, are you happy?” Merry asked as he and Frodo entered Frodo’s bedroom and shut the door.

“I am,” Frodo grinned.

“That was wicked of us, wasn’t it?” Merry laughed.

“Yes,” Frodo said, sitting the bucket down on the floor and pulling the bolt across his door. He yawned and stretched. “It has taken me ten years but I have finally got my revenge.”

“I have to hand it to you, Cousin,” Merry said. “You were very patient.”

“Yes, well, you can’t dump freezing water on a child,” Frodo said. “No matter how much you might enjoy it. You can’t do it.”

“It will take him hours to clean that up,” Merry said walking over and stretching out on the bed.

“And even longer to get warm again,” Frodo said coming over and stretching out on the other side of the bed. “Then he’ll likely be wide awake.”

“That bolt that you put on your door was inspired,” Merry said. “I know someone who will be looking for an opportunity to repay your kindness.”

“Yes, I suspect that he will be wanting to seek revenge,” Frodo said. “He won’t have to wait for me to become old enough to repay. He will be at liberty to get even whenever he feels the time is right. That is exactly why I installed that bolt before doing anything else.”

“Always seeing to the details, aren’t you?”

“I try,” Frodo said. “I’ve been waiting for just the right moment to repay Pippin for all of those early morning visits.”

“As have I,” Merry said.

“I suppose we should get some sleep now while Pippin is busy,” Frodo said pulling up the covers on his side of the bed.

Merry yawned. “We should. It’s a shame that we will have to miss the rest of the show. The really entertaining part of all of this is going to be when he realizes that it’s only one in the morning and he is wide awake.”

They both laughed for some time and then Frodo put out the lantern and each of them turned over and covered up. From another part of Bag End they could hear Pippin storming around cursing but it didn’t keep them awake for long.

The End

G.W. 09/10/2006