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Till We Have Faces  by Antane

A couple weeks after the birthday celebrations, Bilbo watched Frodo closely one day in particular. He thought on the 22nd he had received all the confirmation he needed that his heartson’s healing was complete, but then he realized there was one more sign that he noted from its absence rather than its presence which truly showed his beloved one was forever beyond the reach of the Shadow that had so long overhung him.

Frodo was full of light and joy the whole day. He and Bilbo walked slowly in the garden as the sun was setting. “Do you realize what day this is, my lad?” the ancient hobbit asked.

“No, all of them seem to blend into each other here.”

Bilbo smiled. “It is October the sixth and this is the first time in years you have not spent it on Weathertop.”

Frodo startled then a huge smile broke out on his fair and shining face. “And I am still here and not there!”

As Gandalf and Celebrian watched from a distance the light of Frodo shine out into the evening, the Maia saw the fulfillment of the vision he had seen in Rivendell. “A great Shadow has departed,” he murmured in soft and reverent awe. “He has come through fully at last.” He praised the Powers and the One above them for the gift of such a sight.

Bilbo stopped and sat slowly down on a bench. He took Frodo’s hand as the young son of his heart joined him. “Long years ago, I remember the talk in the Shire about how much of a nuisance Gandalf was and how he ‘encouraged’ me to remain adventurous after my return from my great journey. I was accused then of ‘encouraging’ some of my Tookish relations to become so themselves. You were the most thoroughly encouraged one, my own self. I could look at you and see who I had wanted to be in my youth with all my mad dreams of venturing out beyond the Shire. But I allowed all that to be buried until Gandalf practically pushed me out the door to embrace the dreams I had never forgotten. And he was there to aid you and guide you on your own adventure. I believe there is much more to him than any Hobbit, Man, or Dwarf ever guessed. I think the Elves may suspect something.”

“What are you getting at, Uncle?”

Bilbo’s hand tightened around Frodo’s and Frodo’s around his. “I am ready for my next adventure, my best beloved. Did you read in all my writings about the Gift that was given to Men?”

“Yes, that they could choose the time of their own deaths. In my darkest hours, while Sam slept contentedly with Rose, and I stared into the emptiness inside me and felt it crush me until I could hardly breathe, I thought of that choice. I thought of the knives in the kitchen and the Elven rope that Sam had brought from the Golden Wood and of Sting. Then I would hear Sam’s gentle snores and I knew I could not do anything to bring that choice upon me in such a way. If I had done it then, in an evil mood, I do not think it would have been a Gift to me, even though the tempting voice inside of me presented it so. Imagine how something as simple as a snore could rescue me for a moment and show me there was love and life beyond my prison and it could still reach me.” Frodo looked at Bilbo. “Do you now wish to accept the Gift as it was meant?”

Bilbo returned the look with tears in his eyes and reached out to hold him tightly. “Oh, my dearest boy. Will you ever forgive me?”

Frodo held him just as tightly and then reached up to dry Bilbo’s tears “There is nothing to forgive, Uncle. You did no harm to me. If you accept such a Gift now, then I know it is mine to receive as well. As much I would like to join you on your adventure, I want to stay here and see Sam. I do not want him to make such a long trip for naught, knowing how much he hates the water.”

Bilbo smiled through his tears. “And how much he loves you.”

Frodo kissed his uncle’s head. “Go, my dearest Bilbo, and have your adventure. I will tarry here and then Sam and I will join you, and we shall be merry once more.”

With such a blessing, Bilbo knew the day had come. He turned back inside as the last glint of light disappeared from the sky. He settled down on his bed and Frodo and Boromir sat at his side. The younger Baggins took his uncle’s hand again and looked into those dear eyes one last time and saw them look into his. Bilbo reached up to touch Frodo’s cheek and smiled. “My bright and beautiful boy, so dearly loved, my heart’s own mate and mirror.” Frodo smiled bravely back. Tears pricked at his eyes but he willed them not to fall, not yet. He kissed his uncle’s brow. “Go on, my dearest. I will follow when I may.”

“I’ll be waiting for you, my lad, for both my lads,” Bilbo said with a smile at Boromir. He tightened his grip on Frodo’s hand, then closed his eyes and surrendered his spirit. His last breath came out as a sigh. As his hand relaxed in Frodo’s, there was a great silence, then the Ring-bearer hung his head and wept. Boromir placed his hand on his little brother’s shoulder and after a while, Frodo sought the comfort of his arms.

The next morning, Gandalf and the Elves accompanied Frodo and Boromir as they buried Bilbo with his head closest to the Shire and his face facing toward Elvenhome and the adventure beyond that the hobbit was now experiencing. Frodo spent some time sheltered in the arms of Gandalf and also accepted the embraces of Elrond, Galadriel and Celebrian. It was a sad time for them all but a blessed time to be together and to have known such a rare hobbit.

Later in the afternoon, Frodo and Boromir stood at the edge of the Sea. The hobbit looked up at the man. “Can you carry me out, please? I can make it further with you than I could on my own.”

Boromir looked down at his beloved friend and smiled. For the first time since the Quest and their first meeting, Frodo reminded him of a child, though he knew the hobbit was older than he was. “Of course, little brother.” He bent down to take Frodo onto his shoulders, as he had done with Faramir a lifetime ago, and waded into the water until it nearly covered the top of his chest. They stood there for a long time to be closer to the land and kin they had left. The tears that fell into the water Ulmo blessed and cleansed, so when they reached the Shire, they were received as a gift and mixed with Sam’s own tears, as he knew their cause. Yet, it was not completely in sorrow that the hobbit received them, for it meant his master lived still.





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